Title: Frequency
Author: Dee
Rating: R
Word Count: 1820
Pairings: Gil and Nick
Characters: Gil Grissom, Nick Stokes and the gang!
Warnings: Fluff
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: In my dreams they are like, totally mine!
Beta: jayceepat and podga for their invaluable help in the Americanisation of the fic and their insightful comments. I thank high_striker for his wonderful icons. I am indebted to them all. Any errors are mine.
A/N: Totally made up data….so don’t get any ideas…….


“…. and you should ask him ‘cause you’re his best buddy and…..”

This was the snippet of conversation that Gil heard as he entered the briefing room to hand out assignments. Greg stopped speaking, abruptly, as he saw Gil enter.

“Ask whom about what Greg?” he asked.

“Oh, nothing of any interest boss.” Was the immediate response.

Naturally Gil assumed two things from this ‘evidence’ – it was not ‘nothing’ and it was of ‘interest’, ‘Oh yes,’ as a third point it was probably about him. Was he paranoid – not particularly - but what did Nick call it, ‘spideysense’, when you knew that there was something afoot!

“Where’s Nick?” he asked instead.

“Taking a call from a lab in Canada about some evidence tracking on a case.” Replied Warrick, to whom Greg’s overheard statement, had been addressed.

“Right then…….” And Gil handed out the fairly mundane assignments for his team. He had intended pairing Warrick and Nick up together, but he had an inkling that he needed to forewarn Nick about…….whatever.

“Okay, that’s it; I’ll do the murder - suicide with Nick, when he’s ready.” All the team looked at him, not exactly strangely, but suspiciously, yes, that was it. While he rarely accompanied Nick to scenes, since they’d been out in the open about their relationship, he still did on occasion. This was going to be one of those occasions.

With good cause, he thought, as he took in the feel of the room following his pronouncement. At that moment, Nicky strode into the room and plonked himself down on a seat. “Sorry about that, them there ‘Mounties’ lost their man!” and he looked around and in an instant was in tune with Gil – something was not quite right here.

“You’re with me Nick.” Gil said in a matter of fact tone, rather pleased that Nick looked quite as if it was the most normal occurrence in the lab.

“Okay, your truck, my truck, both trucks?”

“Yours, I’ll need my kit though and I’ve a call to make and an e-mail to answer before we go.”

“Need any help – I can do one or the other for you?”

“That’s good – you could do the call.”

Both men became aware that their very ordinary, work related, verbal exchange was being carefully monitored by the rest of the team.

“What?” Nick enquired.

To blustery ‘nothings’ and ‘lets get on the road’ to ‘see you guys’ they were gone, leaving Gil and Nick looking at the door through which they’d all just exited.

“Well….according to Greg, there’s nothing going on here Nick, what do you think?”

“Not ‘nothing’ Gil, that’s for sure; what do you know?”

Gil related what he’d heard and more importantly to Nick, who liked the idea, what his spideysense had gleaned.

“….so I didn’t want you going out with Warrick to face a barrage of questioning about ‘it’ without being warned….and without our stories being synchronised.”

“Are you living on Paranoia Street, Gil?” Nick laughed at Gil.

“No! It’s you and this ‘spideysense’ thing, you’ve got me imagining all sorts of scenarios, but you can’t deny there’s a funny….undercurrent…. or something going on.”

“Okay Peter Parker I’ll go with that! Come on lets do your biz, so we can get on the road.”

Twenty minutes later the call and e-mail were completed and the men were on their way to the scene.

The next time they all met up was at the end of the shift and a very successful one too, all matters had been tied up or were on the way to being tied up. Catherine suggested a breakfast buffet and all of them made their way to the ‘Luxor’, which had the cheapest buffet around at that moment.

Eight of them found themselves around a table with food and drinks piled up with not a hint of a healthy option in sight. They talked about the cases they’d had and a funny story about Warrick and a parrot at his scene, scaring the living daylights out of him by speaking in an inhuman voice – and ‘yes‘ he’d pulled his gun. Luckily Sofia had witnessed this and promised to tell everyone - she had now fulfilled that promise.

They all laughed with Warrick, who took it with good humour – after all, it had been very funny – after the event! When the laughter died down there was a lull in the banter between them and Gil and Nick, so acutely tuned into the group dynamics knew there was something, something bubbling under the surface.

Greg was eyeing Warrick who looked uncomfortable and was clearly not going to do whatever it was he was being urged to do. Catherine was pretending disinterest and Sara was grinning. Jim and Sofia had no idea, at all, what was going on.

Nick took the proverbial bull by the horns, “What’s going on here? Greg, man, you’re just itching, what’s going on?

”Nothing!” Greg’s crimson blush, and wide eyed innocent look, placed him at the scene of the crime.

Warrick shook his head and Catherine again was trying to distance herself, but it was Sara who spoke.

“Greg read somewhere that gay men had more sex than any other type of coupling, including heterosexual married couples – he wanted to know if you two could confirm it.”

Nick’s mouth fell open and it was his turn to give the wide eyed look. Gil also had his mouth drop open, but only metaphorically, HE wouldn’t be seen ‘dead’ looking like a fish out of water. But, he couldn’t speak, he was…..just….staggered…. at the audacity.

Gil‘s immediate thought was that whatever Greg wanted to know, and he could be a pesky little creature, it was the manner of Sara’s delivery that had caused him the most shock. He knew, just knew, that she was hoping to elicit some angry response from Gil about the relationship; she would never forgive him for passing her over for Nick.

Unfortunately for Sara she hardly knew Gil at all, although she thought she knew him intimately. Once the shock had faded it was all Gil could do not to laugh and he thought, ‘wouldn’t they like to know how much life there was left in this old dog’!

It was Nick who found his voice first, when the occupants of the table were silent, probably expecting Gil (?) to throw some sort of fit at the intrusion and private nature of the question. “I can hardly believe that you would read that sort of garbage Greg and that y’all would be taken in with it.” He wasn’t angry either, because he actually did have Gil, ‘so there Sara’.

“Hold on a minute there Nicky, there’s a valid point to be made here. I mean, I can see the scientific reasoning behind the statement.”

“You can?” Nick asked incredulously and all eyes held that same incredulous look and Sara’s grin had been wiped away.

“Of course, there is a lot of speculation about the nature of relationships and how they develop, heterosexually speaking! There is always some commentary ongoing about why, particularly after marriage, the sex drives of men and women appear to diverge. Think about the old jokes about ‘headaches’, it’s always the woman that would appear to find such an excuse, therefore one could speculate that where two men were in a relationship that so called ‘divergence’ or ‘headache’ would not be a problem, and as a consequence would have more ‘frequent’ physical relations. I think it may well merit some serious scientific study and data collection.”

Just a few words into this little lecture Nick knew that Gil was ‘winging it’ – he had a certain ‘dry’ delivery that Nick could detect, and maybe Catherine too on a good day, but as far as he could see on the faces of his friends, sitting around the table, they’d been sucked in.

Greg was open-mouthed, Warrick and Catherine, Sofia and Jim all looked somewhat shocked. Sara, her plan foiled, looked evil!

“When you put it like that Gil, you’re absolutely right.” Nick was going to milk this as much as he could. “It would explain our situation and possibly why we’re so damn tired all the time.”

“It had just not occurred to me before Nick, but to ease the situation in respect of the ‘frequency’ I think that one of us is going to have to assume the role of the wife….”

“Or we could alternate?” Nick intercepted.

“That sounds like a plan Nicky. When should we start?”

“Well…..I suppose it depends on who’s going to bot……” Nick had never intended to finish the word hoping that he would be stopped. He was.

“TOO much information Nick!” As Nick had expected, it was Warrick. Nick was far better than any of them knew at reading them and he knew their individual traits inside out.

“But, I thought it was your intention to elicit the frequency of our physical activities, for a scientific study Greg, and I’m all for scientific advancement, you know me.” Gil was still deadpanning at the audience but they’d caught on now. Greg felt very nervous and Sara was ready to test how much pressure was needed to strangle someone, although she was undecided as to who her first victim would be – maybe Greg, but probably Nick – he’d stolen Gil from under her nose, after all.

Sofia and Jim led the laughter and Jim admitted that Gil had had him fooled there for little while and that he thought Gil was about to spill the beans about his and Nick’s sex life.

“What is there to tell Jim, you’re a cop, and you guys are all top notch criminalists, can’t you tell?” They all looked between the two men.

One by one they came to the same conclusion, Nick and Gil looked wonderful, ‘bright eyed and bushy tailed’ Sofia’s Mom would have said. Catherine knew that Gil was more relaxed and content than she’d ever seen him in the…..fifteen, or more…….years she’d known him.

Warrick grinned, he actually did know a bit about their sex life, gleaned from some throwaway comments from Nick. Greg was mortified; he was expecting a transfer to days.

Sara was ‘clenching’ beneath the table, how could those bastards turn it around and make fun of themselves at the expense of everyone else. If that’s how they liked it they were welcome to it – she’d never take it up the ass, even for Gil Grissom.

Gil and Nick smiled at one another, both knowing full well that neither man would ever need to feign a headache, or pretend to be a ‘wife’. They were very happy indeed with their frequency, Gil especially, because he had no problem at all keeping ‘up’ (as it were) with his younger lover. He thought, ‘didn’t someone say, ‘the more you do it, the more you can do it’’ – or was that just me!’

The End