Title: When You're Gone
By: Fran Holland
Pairing; Gil/Nick
Note: *I heard the song "When You're Gone" by Avril Lavigne and this little scene flashed in my head, so I had to jot it down. Hope you like it.

Gil woke up with a start. He lay on his stomach for a few seconds, letting his mind clear of sleep. He looked up at the digital clock by his bed. Four thirty. He rolled over on his back and looked over at the still made side of the bed. Nick's side.

He really didn't think it would hurt this bad. Then again, he'd never really been in love before. He wondered if Nick realized how much Gil needed him. He had heard people talk about being in love. They described it as an actual pain in the chest. Gil was experiencing that now. He felt as if his heart was in fragments.

Gil swung his legs over the side of the bed and stood up. Catching a glimpse of himself in the mirror, he groaned. His hair was standing on end, there were dark circles under his eyes and his beard really needed to be trimmed. Nick would have commented on it with one of his beautiful smiles.

When Nick walked out of his house three days and eight hours ago, Gil had watched from the front window and found himself counting each of Nick's footsteps has he walked to his truck. God, how he missed him.

After using the bathroom, Gil started the shower. Once the water was hot, he pulled off his boxers and stepped under the spray. How had he gotten to the age of 54 without being really in love? He really didn't like this feeling. For the entire time that Nick and he had been seeing each other, he'd been leaving the lab at regular hours, eating regularly and even relaxing. Catherine and Jim were even beginning to look at him strangely.

Gil shut off the water and pulled the shower curtain open. The mirror had fogged up and Gil's heart lurched. The memory hit him hard. He had been in the shower after a long shift and when he had stepped out he saw Nick's writing on the steamed up mirror. 'Blowjob?" Gil had laughed and when he walked into the bedroom, Nick was sprawled on the bed. He had been completely naked and his hand was wrapped around his hard dick.

Shaking his head to clear the memory, he finished drying himself. He trimmed his beard, combed his hair and brushed his teeth. Making his way back into the bedroom, his gaze fell on the dirty clothes hamper and he saw a splash of red. Gil didn't own anything red, so he moved a few items of clothing and found a pair of Nick's boxer briefs. The red ones that Gil loved so much. He picked them up and held them in his hands for a few seconds and then lifted them to his face. They smelled like Nick. Feeling like an idiot, he flung the offending piece of clothing across the room.

Dressing in record time, Gil raced down the steps and opened Hank's crate. The exuberant dog wiggled all over and after greeting his master, he headed for the back door. Nick had spoiled Hank by letting him sleep with them. The past three days, Gil had made Hank stay in his crate while he slept.

After letting Hank out into his fenced courtyard, Gil stood at the back door looking at the dog run around from bush to bush. Nick had taken him shopping at the local home and garden store and talked him into buying a bistro set with an umbrella and a new grill. They had spent the Saturday before Nick had left grilling steaks and drinking beer. It had been nice sitting out under the stars and watching the fireflies. Lampyridae. Gil have given Nick a brief lesson and Nick had told Gil about the time he and his sisters had collected over fifty of the little insects in a jar. Nick accidently broke the jar in the kitchen his mother had a fit. He told Gil that he and his sisters were on restriction for two weeks after that incident.

Finally, he couldn't take it any longer. He grabbed his phone and punched in the familiar number.

"Stokes."

"Nick, it's me."

"Hey, you." Gil could hear the smile in Nick's voice.

"I need to talk to you."

"Oh." Nick suddenly sounded wary.

"I've been doing a lot of thinking...and I really don't like this....feeling. I miss you...and I....I'm not sure...but I think...we need to discuss.... youmovinginherebecauseImissyousoGoddamnmuchandIthinkI'mfallinginlovewithyou."

Gil inhaled sharply. He had sounded like a total idiot. And Nick wasn't saying anything. The silence went on for a few seconds, but Gil felt it was hours.

"Gil, I miss you too. I'll be back tomorrow and we'll talk. Okay?"

Gil wanted to sob, but kept his cool. Nick had not said anything about loving him.

"Yeah, yeah, fine. We'll talk when you get back. How's your class going?" Gil changed the subject quickly.

"It's been pretty good. I could learn more from you though. Why can't you teach our continuing education classes, that way I wouldn't be stuck in Los Angeles in all this smog?

"Well, I guess I'll see you tomorrow night." Gil said softly.

"My flight gets in at 10:30 in the morning, Gil. We can see each other before work, can't we?"

"I just thought you might want to..." Gil didn't get a chance to finish.

"I want to be with you." Nick whispered.

Gil sighed. He supposed Nick would want to have sex. Maybe it was all about the sex for Nick. Then again, Nick was young and beautiful, he could be having sex with any number of people. Men and women.

"Gil? You still there?"

"Yes."

"So, do you want me to come to your place?

"Sure, Nick. If you want to."

"Gil, is something wrong?"

"No. What could be wrong? I'll see you tomorrow then."

"I love you."

It took Gil a few moments to register those three little words.

"Gil, did you hear me?"

"Oh God, Nicky. I love you too. So very much."

Gil knees were suddenly too weak to hold him up and he sank to the floor. His hands were sweaty and he felt light-headed.

"I'll be home soon. Bye, babe."

"Bye." Gil clicked his phone shut and grinned.

"He loves me." Gil said to the empty room. He got slowly to his feet and opened the the back door. Hank rushed in.

"I love him and he loves me." Gil told the dog. Still grinning, Gil went to his kitchen and fed the dog and made himself a sandwich. He flipped on the stereo and hummed along with the country song. For once, not caring that Nick kept changing his stereo from the classical station he prefered to the country station.

The End.