The Secrets We Keep

Title: The Secrets We Keep

By: Cosmorain

Disclaimer: I do not own them, I'm just playing with them (insert evil laugh)
Pairings: Nick/David
Spoilers: Grave Danger (It's been a while sine I have seen it so I could be wrong about the details.)

Summary: During Nick's abduction some secrets come out. This is my first CSI fanfiction, and the first fanfiction I have written in years. Be gentle, No flames Please.

It was a secret.

A secret they had kept for two years. It wasn't that they were ashamed. Who would be ashamed of loving Nick Stokes and having that love returned David thought. They were just cautious. The only one who knew about them was Nick's family. Who they had told last Christmas. David had been apprehensive about meeting Nick's family but in the end it had all worked out. Nicky's father was confused, wasn't his son a football player, a ladies man? The coming out had caused Judge Stokes to do some soul searching on the stereotypes he placed on people and by the end of their visit he was, if not comfortable with his son's choice of lifestyle, he was well on his way too it. Nick's mother had just laughed and hugged Nick fiercely saying she was proud her son had the courage to tell them what she had suspected for years. Nick had been gob smacked staring at his mother his mouth gaping open. His mother had laughed again, bright and loud and was music to David's ears. She had nudged Nick's Mouth shut with a shake of her head.

"I'm your mother Nicky. Mother's know their children." She had said nodding wisely.

It had been so simple and so beautiful. Nicky's face had lit up and all his sisters who had been sitting by watching had pounced on him dragging him to the floor, taunting "Nicky's got a boyfriend! Nicky's got a boyfriend!" over and over again as they began a massive pillow fight war. David had stared amused to see the manly Nick Stokes conquered by a group of giggling girls.

He had tensed a bit when Gillian, Nick's mom had come to sit beside him on the couch.

"Hello David. Are you having a nice time in our home?" David nodded with a smile and Gillian took his hand giving it a gentle squeeze as she asked if his family was missing him this Christmas. When David had come out in his years at college he had been disowned by his own parents. His father had gone so far as to punch him and had physically thrown him from his childhood home his mother watching with hatred in her eyes. They had cut off his college fund and David had to work two jobs just to make it.

He hadn't meant to tell all of this to Nick's family but the years of holding it in had taken their toll and the story had come out spilling onto the floor ugly and shameful. There was quiet for a few moments after he finished and David not taking his eyes off of the floor the whole time he was speaking was startled when soft arms wrapped around him and he felt tears on his shoulder. When he looked up he was staring at the warm brown eyes of Gillian Stokes, eyes that Nick had inherited.

"We are your family now David." She whispered and looking into her honest eyes he couldn't help but believe her. That Christmas was the best one David had ever experienced. He had gained something he thought he had lost a long time ago.

A family.

And that's why it hurt. They were a family him and Nicky, his sisters and Nicks parents. It hurt that none of their friends knew. They had planned to come out slowly, but here he was sitting with his head in his hands the last one to know that Nicky had been abducted.

No one had told him. He hadn't found out until they had brought him trace, and then even after the incident with that delivery man, that damn delivery man who he could have killed, no one knew. He hadn't even got to call Nick's parents. He was lost and no one knew NO ONE!

xxxx~!~~!~~!~xxxx

Catherine Willows was a smart woman, but the sight of a distraught Hodges was not something she could get her head around, but she supposed that Nicky's abduction was getting to all of them. She had just been paged by Grissom. Nick's parents had arrived and she was needed to help in breaking the news and calming what she knew were soon to be distraught parents.

When she arrived Judge Stokes and his wife were sitting in front of Grissom's desk. Judge Stokes was holding back his tears and holding his wife's hand trying to comfort her. She watched as Grissom explained what happened and when he was finished she updated them on what they were doing to find Nicky. As long as she lives Catherine will forever remember the haunted look on Gillian Stokes face, and as a mother to a little girl growing up fast in a dangerous city she prayed it was a look she would never wear.

Gillian straightened and spoke.

"Where's David?" She asked a hint of desperation in her voice. Catherine shared a look with Grissom and he shrugged he shoulders.

"Where is David?" She asked again. "I want David! I want to see David!" Gilliam stood up agitated and began pacing the office."

"Who are you talking about Mrs. Stokes? Who is David?" Grissom asked calmly. It took Catherine two seconds to put it together.

"You mean David Hodges?" Catherine asked. Gillian stopped her pacing and turned to Catherine.

"Of course I mean David Hodges." Gillian said irritated. "Bring me my son- in-law NOW!"

Greg Sanders stood in front of Nick's locker debating.

He knew about David and Nick. Neither one had told him. It was just a coincidence that he had found out they way he did.

It had been about a week ago, it was supposed to have been Nick's day off but graveyard needed help on a big case and he was called in. More like ordered in, in a get here as fast as you can kinda way. So Greg had walked by the locker room when he had caught Nick removing a gold band from his left ring finger hastily as if he had forgotten it was there, before storing it in a black velvet box which he placed near the back on the top shelf of his locker.

Now Greg may have been the youngest CSI, he may have had an out of control wardrobe, and he may be the worst speller in the whole Clark County crime lab, but he knew a wedding band when he saw one. He also came to the conclusion that Nick was trying his best to hide the ring as he still had on his Texas A&M ring so it wasn't that he was scared of it getting damaged. No Greg thought, he's definitely trying to hide it.

"Hey man!" Greg exclaimed bouncing into the locker room. Nick jumped startled and slammed his locker shut twisting the combo in rapid succession. Greg couldn't help but be amused, it wasn't everyday he got to startle Nicky. Nick took a deep breath and smiled at Greg.

"Hey G. What's the situation tonight." Nick sat on the bench tying his work shoes as Greg watched him with a playful smile on his face.

"There was a shoot out behind the Tangiers. It looks like it might be gang related, and with Sophia out of town we need help, hence why you were called in." Nick shook his head in understanding tying his other shoe.

"Where's Grissom?" Nicked asked.

"He's on his way to the scene. I'm only here to get you and fill you in on the details." Nick stood, nodded, and started to walk out.

"So Nicky." Greg said following after Nick out the door. "How does your wife feel about you getting called in on your day off." Greg smirked as Nick stiffened and turned back to the young smug CSI.

"I don't have a wife G." Nick said looking puzzled. Greg almost believed it, would have if he hadn't seen the evidence first hand.

"I saw the ring Nicky." Greg said. Nick glanced at his locker and then to Greg.

"Look G, I got to do something before we head out real quick." He paused. "I'll meet you by the car."

"But..." Greg started to protest.

"I don't have a wife Greg. Now I'll see you out front." Nick turned again leaving Greg standing in the doorway. But... he thought to himself. I didn't imagine that ring. Greg shook his head and started down the hall. He saw Nick slip into Hodges lab and thought it odd. They hadn't even started the case yet why was he going to see Hodges. Greg crept down the hall trying to stay out of sight as best as he could in a building made of glass walls. The closer he got to the lab the more intrigued he became. He watched Nick lean down and says something to Hodges and Greg inhaled a sharp breath when he caught the expression on Hodges face as he answered whatever Nick had asked him. It was brief and if he hadn't of been looking so hard he might have missed it. That look on Hodges face, it was love. Greg watched as Nick leaned lower as if he were looking through the microscope and slowly reach out and caressed Hodges lower back. It would not have been noticeable to anyone else but at Greg's angle he could see it clearly.

Nick leaned back up, said a quick goodbye and turned to leave. Greg scrambled away from where he was hiding and walked quickly to the front trying to process what he had seen. Nick and Hodges. He couldn't believe it. Would not have if hadn't seen it for himself. But wait what about the ring. Greg pushed open the front doors as he contemplated the mysterious ring. Nick said he didn't have a wife but the ring... and then it hit him. Greg's face lit up into a thousand watt smile. Nick said he didn't have a wife, not that he wasn't married. He didn't have a wife, he had a husband. Greg shook his head leaning against the door waiting for Nicky to come out the front doors. Well he thought, didn't they think they were clever. The more Greg thought about it the more things in the past started to make sense. Like how Nicky volunteered to take and get results from trace, or how Nicky had defended Hodges the other day in the break room when Catherine complained that he was working too slow. It all fit.

Nick wandered out the door and took the keys from Greg.

"I'm driving G." He said. Greg shrugged his shoulders and climbed into the passenger seat. As they pulled out onto the road Greg couldn't help but grin over at Nick.

"What?" Nick asked. Greg just shook his head and turned to look out the window as he began to give Nick the details of the case.

Later that evening while Nick was tied up talking to Grissom, Greg took their collected evidence to trace. Hodges was bent over his microscope and raised his head a look of annoyance on his face when he saw Greg standing in front of him with a ridiculous grin.

"Sanders," Hodges remarked dryly. "I didn't think you remembered where the labs were around her since you turned traitor." Greg ignored his tone.

"Ahh Hodgey. You know you love me and are just venting to hide the fact that my presence was the only highlight in your sad lonely world." Hodges snorted and went back to working.

"Yeah Sanders you found me out. I sit here lonely and desperate without you. No go away so I can be lonely and desperate in peace." Greg placed the evidence bags on the counter and winked at Hodges.

"So you finally admit it, that the lab is lost without me." Hodges leaned over to peer into his microscope.

"I'll admit you're an idiot. Go bother the other CSIs, or oh here's a thought you could always sign up for those spelling lessons you so desperately need." Greg winced a bit at the bite in Hodges words and wondered not for the first time that night how Nicky had ended up with rude, sarcastic David Hodges. Greg began to turn away but caught a glint of Gold around Hodges neck. A pale band of Gold on a thin chain that had fallen out of his shirt as he leaned over the microscope.

Greg smirked. Well that answered that question. Hodges looked up irritated when he realized Greg was watching him.

"Why are you still here? Don't you have something else you could be screwing up, like a crime scene?"

"Ah Hodges you wound me." Greg swooned dramatically and Hodges couldn't keep a small smile off his face at the younger mans antics.

"Good." He said turning away "Now go bleed somewhere else." Greg saluted him and made his way down the hall. Yes he thought to himself I am going to make one hell of a CSI one day my friends.

That was last week. Now Nicky was kidnapped and Greg had no idea if Hodges knew or not. Steeling his resolve he turned Nicky's combination, which he had stolen, and fished out the black velvet box on the top shelf. He cradled it in his hands gently as he slowly opened the lid. Nestled inside was a gold band glowing brightly in the harsh fluorescent light of the locker room. Greg dared not touch it but could make out the initials NSDH. He closed the lid and the locker and made his way down the hall. He had to find Hodges and give him Nicky's ring so when they found him, and find him they would, he could be the one to slip it on Nicky's finger because in Greg's mind no one but Hodges had the right to do so.

"Bring me my son- in-law NOW!" Gillian repeated her voice shrill with just a hint of desperation in it. Grissom looked over to Catherine who looked shocked at Gillian's admission then back to Gillian herself. He cleared his throat.

"Mrs. Stokes. We are unaware that Hodges was in a relationship with one of your children. May I ask which one he is married to."

Gillian glared at Grissom and opened her mouth to lash out when Judge Stokes placed a gentle hand on her shoulder.

"Gillian." He said. "I don't believe Poncho or David have told them yet." Gillian stared at her husband in horror.

"But Nicky said that they were going to tell them. He told me over the phone last week. Oh God." She placed a hand over her mouth.

"Mr. Grissom." Judge Stokes said turning to the stunned supervisor. "Poncho and David have been married for a little over a year. I presided over the ceremony myself. I believe the relationship had been going on for a lot longer than that. I hope that as this new information comes to light it will not be held against Nick or David and their place in your lab." Judge Stokes face grew hard. "If I find any discrimination against my son or his husband you can be rest assured that I will bring down the full extent of the law upon this facility." Grissom leaned back in his chair and studied Judge Stokes coolly.

"We do not tolerate discrimination here Judge Stokes. Nick and David are excellent at their jobs, some of the best in this lab. We will not let sexual orientation dictate how we treat our valued employees." Judge Stokes nodded at Grissom his expression still hard.

"What about as his friends?" Gillian asked. Catherine looked over at her shocked.

"We love Nicky, and we respect Hodges even when he is being a pain in the ass. Nothing is going to change that." Gillian nodded and turned to Grissom.

"I believe Catherine speaks for all of us. We will not turn our backs on them." Gillian collapsed into her chair.

"Thank you." She whispered. "Thank you."

Greg hovered in the doorway to Hodges' lab. The man himself was sitting on his stool staring off into space. His blue eyes were cloudy and sad as he tugged on the chain around his throat. Greg had once thought he had been in love, but now seeing the utter despair on David's face he knew what he had felt all those years ago was nothing compared to what David felt for Nick.

"Hey." He said softly walking through the door and closing it behind him. David jerked and turned to face Greg pushing his chain back into his shirt.

"Sanders." He said taking a deep breath. "What do you need?" Greg could tell by the lack of sarcasm in David's voice that he was very troubled. Greg cleared his throat and reached into his pocket.

"I wanted to bring this to you. I thought it might comfort you to have it until we get Nicky back." David looked puzzled but reached out and took a small black box from Greg's grasp. He inhaled sharply and his eyes watered when he realized what he was holding.

"Oh God." He exclaimed closing his eyes as if in pain. He stayed like that with his head bent and both hands wrapped around the small box as if to protect it from the outside world. "How did you get this?" He asked looking up at Greg. Greg shrugged awkwardly.

"I kinda broke into Nicky's locker and took it. I just felt that I needed to bring it to you, to let you know that I know about you and Nicky." David opened the box and looked at the ring nestled inside.

"Did Nicky tell you." Greg smirked.

"Not in actual words. I saw him take it off and put it in his locker one day. I asked him about it but he swore he didn't have a wife. It took me a minute to realize that he hadn't said he wasn't married just that he didn't have a wife. After that all it took was to watch you two around each other and I knew." Greg paused. "Plus I saw your ring when it slipped out of your shirt one day. I may not be able to spell but one plus one is always two, if you get my drift my friend." David smiled a little and glanced up at Greg.

"Does anyone else..." He trailed of his face apprehensive.

"Not that I know of. Sara has been giving you two some funny looks but I don't know if she knows anything concrete." He shrugged again.

"Thank you." David said his eyes dropping to the floor. Greg shook his head.

"Look David. We love Nick, and lord only knows why but we love you too. It doesn't matter to us whether you are gay or straight. Were going to be there for you guys." David was shocked into silence. When did Greg of all people get so smart.

"Listen." Greg said. "Let's head over to the break room. I'll make you a special pot of my gourmet coffee and will see what's going on with Nicky's case." David sighed and stood up making his way to the door. As they walked down the hall side by side Greg could feel David's eyes on him.

"What?" He asked. David smirked.

"I would just like to let it be know for the record that I still despise you, and you're annoying, and you use way top many chemicals in your hair." Greg laughed, he never thought hearing sarcasm and insults would be so reassuring.

"Of course not Hodges I wouldn't expect anything else."

The break room was quiet when David and Greg entered, Warrick and Sara sat at the table pouring over evidence but looked up when Greg led David over to the couch and pushed him gently onto the cushions before going over to the coffee maker to get David a cup.

"Hey Guys." Greg said as he poured a second cup for himself and walked back over to David.

Sara was shocked at David's appearance. He looked tired and depressed, which was unusual for him. She tried to recall Hodges looking anything but sarcastic and smirky but couldn't, seeing him like this made the whole situation even more unreal.

"Hey." She said softly. Greg nodded but David just stared into his coffee cup lost in thought.

"What's going on with Nicky's case?" Greg asked. Warrick sighed his eyes heavy with guilt. Sarah noticed David eyeing them with such intensity as if he were hanging on their every word.

"We know who took Nicky. His name is Walter Gordon. His daughter Kelly Gordon is serving time at Nevada State Prison. Gordon claims that the evidence we collected that tied Kelly to a murder was unjustified. He set up this... this damn trap to punish us." Warrick leaped from his chair pacing the room in frustration.

"What do you mean punish us?" Greg asked. Sara sighed and ran a hand through her hair.

"He blames us, the crime lab, for sending his daughter to prison since we processed the evidence that led to her conviction."

"That's bullshit!" Greg exclaimed. "If the evidence said she was guilty, she was."

"We know that Greg but Walter Gordon doesn't. He's holding Nicky hostage. He's even demanding a ransom. Grissom's trying his hardest to get the police and the lab to pay it, but we don't know that they will." Sara sounded so heartbroken, David glanced at Warrick who was still pacing and looked near to tears as well.

"Why Nicky?" He asked his voice low and horse but glaringly loud in the quiet room. Warrick stopped his pacing and sank into his chair pressing a hand over his face.

"It was the last call for our shift. We flipped a coin. Nicky lost. It should be me in there, not him." Warrick looked so lost and defeated that he couldn't be mad at him. Nicky would have chosen to be buried rather than have any of his friends in danger. David opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by a most welcome sound.

"David!" He heard a voice exclaim. David looked up and over to the doorway just in time to see Gillian Stokes rush into the break room. He tried to stand but before he could she launched herself at him wrapping her arms around his shaking frame, and for the first time that night David let go of the tears he wanted to cry. He buried his face into her shoulder and let loose a quiet sob.

"Gilly," He whispered brokenly. "What am I going to do. I can't lose him. I won't survive it." Gillian shushed him as she rocked him back and forth.

"He's not going anywhere David. We'll get him back." David felt a warm hand on his shoulder and turned around to find that Greg had moved from the couch and Judge Stokes had taken his place.

"I'm so sorry sir. I wanted to call you but by the time I found out they told me you were on your way here." David looked down ashamed.

"We know , Mr. Grissom has explained it all to us." David tried to pull away from Gillian, but she held on tight.

"I need to hold on to one of my sons now David. Please don't pull away." David closed his eyes at those words. He hadn't been anyone's son in so long.

"Sure mom," He said a lump in his throat "hold on as long as you want." At those words Gillian started to cry and pressed closer to David. Judge Stokes swallowed hard and wrapped an arm around the pair and gave a gentle squeeze before he rose to join the other across the room.

Catherine who had followed the Judge and his wife watched the scene, her heart breaking at their anguish. She straightened her shoulders. She wasn't going to let this family be torn apart not when she could do something about it. The county wasn't going to pay the ransom. She knew that and so did Gil, but she knew someone who could. Catherine slowly eased from the room down the hall and out the front doors.

In the break room Warrick and Sara were in shock at the scene before them. Greg just sat at the table his eyes on the coffee cup he nestled between his hands. He looked up when Judge Stokes sat down next to him.

"Your Greg, right." He asked. Greg briefly smiled and nodded. "Nick and David talk about you all the time." Greg laughed.

"Are you sure David hasn't complained about me." Judge Stokes laughed.

"Yeah I can remember something about a bad taste in music, but other than that I've only heard good things." Greg snorted.

"Hodges doesn't know good music." He paused. "I know." He said quietly. Judge Stokes smiled softly.

"I figured you did. You're the only one who doesn't look surprised." Greg looked over to he couch were David and Gillian were talking softly.

Warrick and Sara looked from Greg to David on the couch.

"I'm sorry" Sara started. "I don't mean to but in but are we missing something."

"Yeah" Warrick said.

Greg sighed and opened his mouth to speak but was cut off by a voice from the couch.

"Nicky and I have been married for a year." David looked over at Warrick and Sara. "I know I'm not your favorite person in the world but I love Nicky and I hope as his friends you'll not let our marriage change your opinion of him."

"Of course not man." Warrick said. Sara smiled.

"I knew something was going on." She paused. "Hodges, were your friends too you know. The lab wouldn't be the same without you." David gave them a small smile.

"Thanks."

The room was quiet when Grissom entered. He cleared his throat and all eyes turned to him.

"Catherine has the ransom money. I'm going to make the trade."

It was over.

David couldn't believe it, even as he rushed to the hospital doing almost ninety to keep up with his police escort up ahead.

They had found Nicky. Thank God. After finding out that Walter Gordon had blown himself up they had almost lost hope, but they found him. Found him in time. David had been working trace of the Gordon's "practice" box, when the results came back confirming explosive residue, he felt his heart drop to his knees. He had been angry that they hadn't let him go with them to get Nicky but as he speed dialed Catherine's number he thanked God he had stayed behind.

"Willows." Catherine said. David could hear the relief in her voice.

"Catherine..." David started.

"We found him David. Oh my God, we found him!"

"There's and explosive charge under the box!" He shouted. "It's pressure sensitive. If you move him it will explode!" He could hear her sharp intake of breath. She paused and he thought he would have to yell at her again when she pulled the phone away and told the others to stop. She repeated what David told her and he could hear the exclamations of fear from the others. Catherine must have forgotten she hadn't hung up the phone. All David could hear was silence until Grissom's voice called out instructions clear and sharp in the quiet night. David had always respected Grissom as a professional, but he damn near loved the man now for his level head in any crisis. He could hear machinery and then an earth shattering explosion. He must have cried out as all the eyes of the other lab techs were on him. Catherine must have heard him as well.

"David! David, are you still there?" He muttered some form of confirmation and she continued on. "We got him out David, he's going to be okay were getting in the ambulance now and heading to Dessert Palms. Grissom is arranging a police escort for you and Nicky's parents. Get there as soon as you can." David made to answer when he heard a beautifully week voice utter his name in the background.

"David Nicky's calling for you. I'm going to put the phone up to his ear. Okay." David swallowed hard and whispered okay.

"Here he is."

"Nicky" David said thickly. "Oh God, Nicky baby are you there?" His eyes teared up.

"Dav...id?" David closed his eyes and fell onto his stool.

"Nicky, Nicky honey. I love you. I love you so much."

"Lo..ve you...too." Came the week reply.

"I'm on my way baby. I'll be there as fast as I can. I love you."

"Hur...ry plea...se."

"I will. Catherine?" He asked.

"I'm here David."

"Take care of him until I can get there, stay with him."

"Of course. We'll be waiting on you."

David recalled the phone call in vivid detail as he parked and rushed through the emergency room doors, the police detail and Nick's parents not far behind him. He rushed down the hall still in his blue lab coat. All the faces and sounds were a blur as he focused in on the group of CSI's at the end of the hall.

Greg looked up from the floor he had been intently staring at thinking about how they had almost been to late when he heard the frantic rushing down the hall. When his eyes adjusted he almost had to smile at the sight David made. He marched down the hall glaring at those who got in his way. He was beautiful Greg thought shocked a bit. David had always been a smarmy, sarcastic, know it all, but at that moment he looked like a warrior marching off to battle, a battle he was determined to win. Greg shook his head and smiled. Nicky was damn lucky he thought.

"David." He called out. Greg watched the rest of the team turn their attention to David as he stopped in front of them, belatedly Greg noticed Mr. and Mrs. Stokes come to a halt behind him.

"How is he?" David asked. Catherine stepped forward and squeezed David's arm.

"He's doing really well. The doctor said he only had a slight reaction to the ant bites that sent him into a bit of shock but they have him stabilized. They also said other than a bit of carbon monoxide damage to his lungs, they expect him to make a full physical recovery." David understood what she meant. Physically he would heal but only time would tell emotionally. He heard Nicky's parents cry out their relief. He shook his head and began to speak again when a doctor approached the group. She was young and blonde with a sweet smile, the kind of smile that put you at ease and let you know things would be okay.

"Hello I'm Doctor Abbot, but you can call me Elizabeth. Has David Hodges arrived yet?" David stepped forward.

"I'm David Hodges." Elizabeth smiled at him and reached out to shake his hand.

"Hello David. I'm happy to inform you that Mr. Stokes will make a full recovery. In fact he's been asking for you. Would you like to see him now?" David nodded his head eagerly. Elizabeth turned to address the rest of the crowd. "As soon as we move Mr. Stokes to a private room the rest of you will be able to visit him as well. We will be sure to let you know when that will be." The group nodded as one and David saw Greg lead Nicky's parents to some chairs in the waiting area. David followed Elizabeth through some doors down another hallway.

"I know I don't have to tell you that Mr. Stokes was very fortunate. It could have been a lot more serious." Elizabeth watched as David's eyes misted over. She smiled. "He's quite the charmer." She said casually as they came to stand in front of another set of doors. She stopped. "We've already bonded." David turned to her in confusion and cleared his throat.

"Bonded?" He asked. Elizabeth laughed softly.

"Yeah. We both have husbands named David." It took a minute for the words to register but as they did David chuckled quietly.

"Yeah?" He asked. Elizabeth nodded.

"Now we gave him something for the pain. It will make him groggy but he shouldn't be completely out of it. He may want to scratch because of the bites, try to get him to keep that to a minimum." She paused. "You have ten minutes with him. We need to prepare him to move which shouldn't be too much longer, but you know how it can be finding empty beds here." David nodded. Elizabeth pushed open the doors and nudged David inside. "I'll be back in ten minutes." David nodded again and slowly stepped into the room.

Nicky looked like he was sleeping but his eyes opened as he felt David sit down gently on the bed. He smiled. It was strained but his eyes lit up when he met David's.

"Hey Davie." He said. His voice was soft but strong, nothing like it had been on the phone with David earlier. David couldn't keep the tears at bay any longer.

"Nicky." He said. "I... God I thought I had lost you. I was so scared." Nicky reached up weakly and pulled David down until he head rested on Nick's chest. He stroked David's hair.

"Shusssh...I'm not going anywhere baby. I'm right here."

XXX!~~~XXX~~~!XXX

Catherine leaned back into the chair and closed her eyes wearily. If David hadn't called. Well she didn't want to think too hard about that. She turned her head as Sara sat down beside her.

"You okay?" She asked. Catherine sighed.

"Now I am." Sara nodded knowingly. She stared off in the distance and Catherine could tell she was preoccupied with something.

"What's on your mind?" She asked. Sara shook her self out of her daze and smiled.

"I was just wondering how Nick and Hodges got together." She paused. "I'll bet that's one hell of a story." Catherine nodded and they were both silent for a minute.

"I believe ladies that I can help you out with this one." Sara and Catherine both looked up surprised to see a smirking Jacqui Franco and all the other graveyard techs settling themselves into the waiting room chairs beside them. Sara and Catherine exchanged a look. Yeah, they thought to themselves, this has to be one hell of a story.

It is silent as David lay in Nick's arms. He drew in a shuttering breath and could not shake off the fear that still lingered even after seeing for himself that Nicky was okay. He sniffed and gently sat up. Nick's smile was warm even as his eyes shined with tears.

"Are you okay?" David asked. Nick tried to shrug but winced as he aggravated his injuries.

"Not really." He said dryly. David smirked a bit at his tone and wagged a finger at Nick.

"Tsk, tsk. I am the only snarky one in this relationship." Nick rolled his eyes and laughed a bit. David lifted his hand and stroked the side of Nick's face gently, his eyes serious. "Will you be okay?" He asked. Nick placed his hand behind David's neck and tugged the older man down until there lips met. David could feel Nick sigh as he gently explored David's mouth, and it was then that David knew they would be okay. He knew Nicky had a strength that not many others had. He knew that he would get through this with David by his side.

David opened his eyes as he pulled away. Nick smiled.

"I'll be okay." He whispered. "I promise." David rested his head on Nick's chest again, content on feeling the heartbeat beneath his cheek. They lay there for a few moments until a soft voice cleared its throat.

"Sorry to interrupt but we need to prep you Mr. Stokes so we can move you up stairs." Elizabeth said smiling at the two men. It was times like these that made all the hard work and hardships worth it. Seeing a family through tragedy and helping them overcome it was a wonderful reward.

David sighed and untangled himself from Nick's arms. He stood and leaned down to place a gentle kiss to Nick's forehead.

"Oh." Elizabeth said. "There happens to be a very loud dark headed woman retelling the story of how you to got together out in the lobby. You might want to get out there before she spills it all." David groaned.

"Jacqui." He said irritated.

"Well." Nick said. "At least we won't have to tell it over and over again." David rolled his eyes.

"No. She'll just make it sound ridiculously romantic..."

"Which it is." Nick cut in.

"Nick she'll turn it into a fairytale."

"Which it was."

"She'll make me sound human."

"Which you are."

"No. No I'm not. I'm an unfeeling, snarky, sarcastic lab tech."

"Which I love." David stopped his rant and looked back at Nick.

"I love you too." He paused. "But I must stop Jacqui before she ruins my reputation."

"Let her tell it David. I want our friends to know." David sighed and nodded.

"Well" Elizabeth said. "Mr. Hodges. As soon as he is settled we will let you know." David smiled at her.

"Thanks." He turned to Nick. "I'll be back soon." Nick nodded sleepily.

"I'll be waiting."

XXX!~~~XXX~~~!XXX

Jacqui Franco had always been a good story teller. In fact she prided herself on how she could make a simple trip to the grocery store feel like an adventure. So as all the CSI's and techs gathered around her she knew that she would have their undivided attention.

"Well" She began. "It all started two years ago, with a letter."

David stared at the piece of paper like it might explode. How could this be happening he thought. After his transfer to Vegas he was happy to leave LA behind. Leave his past behind in a city that had been nothing but pain for him. David was gay, homosexual, whatever you wished to call it. He had known it since college but after his family had disowned him, threw him out and taken away his college fund, he had tried to deny it going so far as to get married. He thought maybe if he could love a woman his family would accept him again, but it had been a disaster and his family wouldn't even speak to him. Kate, his ex-wife had realized his preferences 6 months into their marriage and confronted him about it. David was shocked but couldn't continue to deny it.

He expected the divorce, but what he hadn't expected was Kate's understanding. She had smiled and hugged him, threatened to murder his parents for him, and told him they both had been living a lie and it was time they stopped. She confessed to being in love with one of her co-workers, had been for years and like David had gotten married in part to deny her feelings. David had gently asked if she were having an affair. She had laughed at that too he remembered. No she had said. I don't even think he knows I'm alive. David had comforted her and she had asked if he had anyone special. He had told her no, how could he. He had been to busy ignoring the part of him that had been dissatisfied with his life. They had divorced but had remained friends. He had even attended her wedding with the co-worker who she had said didn't know she existed. His name was Brian and the first time David saw them together he knew what true love looked like. So he still called Kate weekly to let her in on what was going on in his life and had made fast friends with Brian over there mutual love of the automobile. All in all the ending of his marriage has only made the bonds they shared stronger.

He didn't know how his parents had felt about the divorce, but he had been surprised to receive a short letter from his younger brother. Eric had been twelve when David's parent had disowned him. He had been seventeen when David had tried to contact them again. He hadn't heard from Eric in years so the letter he sent was a mystery.

It had two words and his signature. I understand. David didn't know what to think. He continued working in LA for two more years, but after his failed marriage David had stopped hiding his orientation and it didn't sit well with his co workers. He decided he needed a new start. LA was finished with him and he with it.

So he transferred to Vegas and after a shaky start he had made good friends with the lab techs and was at least as civil as he could be with the CSI's. That was why he couldn't believe the letter he held in his hands. It was postmarked LA but had been delivered to the lab as the only one from LA who knew where he lived was Kate. He opened the envelope in his lab and as he finished he fell onto his stool with shaky legs.

You faggot! Eric is dead because of you. You infected him with you homosexual sickness. How could you do this to your family, to your brother. You're an abomination. You should have never been born. I should have gotten rid of you the moment I knew I was pregnant. What did you do? Did you fill his head up with your gay nonsense? Did you drive him to question who he was? He killed himself. Slit his wrists in his dorm room. He said he couldn't live a lie anymore. Are you happy? You destroyed our family with your ways. I hope you burn in hell David.

Eric was dead he couldn't believe it. Now the note from before made sense. "I understand" Two simple words. He should have seen it. He heard a tapping on his door and hastily folded up the note and stuck it into the pocket of his lab coat. He looked up to see Nick Stokes standing before him looking concerned.

"Hey Hodges, you alright man?"

"Of course Stokes, Just peachy. May I help you?" Nick stared at Hodges for a few minutes trying to figure out if the lab tech was truly okay.

"I'm just dropping off the trace for the Henderson case. Grissom needs it ASAP." David nodded. Nick was still looking at him intently and it made David uncomfortable.

"Just leave it in the box. I...I have to go get something real quick. Then I'll get started on it." Nick watched as Hodges rushed out the door as if his coat was on fire. Nick shook his head and stepped out into the hall, as he was walking he noticed a folded peace of paper on the ground. He bent down to pick it up and was going to throw it away. As he walked toward the trash he was confronted by an excited Sara Sidle.

"We have our suspect in custody. Let's go." Nick nodded and shoved the paper into his pocket thinking vaguely that he would throw it away when he got home.

David stepped out into the brightly lit hallway but did not make his way back to his fellow co-workers. Instead he sat down in a chair in the small waiting room to his right. Now that he had seen Nicky he cold calm his nerves. He couldn't face his friends until he was sure he could hold it together, besides if Jacqui was telling the story of how they managed to get together he didn't think he could sit through it, not after tonight. He sighed slumping down in an effort to relax, hopefully she wasn't making it to fantastic sounding.

XXX~~!XXX!~~XXX

Unfortunately for David that was exactly what Jacqui was doing.

"So that night when Nick got home..."

Nick Stokes was tired, dead tired. It had taken most of the night but their suspect had confessed and was happily behind bars. He threw his keys on the counter and walked over to the fridge. He pulled out a beer and sat down at his kitchen table. He mused about the day as he tried to wind down. Hodges had been jumpy tonight he thought. After their first encounter that night he hadn't ran into him again until he went to check on the evidence he had dropped off earlier.

When he had arrived at the lab Hodges was searching frantically for something. At that moment he had crawled under the evidence island, checking every nook and cranny of the long counter. Nick just watched for a moment entranced by the way Hodges long coat had rode up his hips leaving his dark clothed rear end exposed. Nick couldn't help but look. After the Nigel Crane episode Nick had noticed his interests creeping slowly toward that of the same sex. At first he thought it was because of the traumatic situation he had went through, but now more than a year later his interest had only increased.

But Nick was noting if not professional, so he settled his eyes away from that tempting view onto the microscope on the table. Still standing in the doorway he cleared his throat. He couldn't help but laugh as Hodges startled and banged his head on the counter as he swiftly stood up. Nick covered his mouth with his hand to stifle the laughter as Hodges glared at him.

"I'm glad my pain amuses you Stokes." Hodges snarled.

"Sorry man." Nick said looking anything but, "Did you lose something? Hopefully not my evidence." Hodges rolled his eyes.

"No." He said. He turned to the printer and grabbed the results. "The bottle had traces of Clonadine in it."

"Clonadine?"

"It's a common medication given to treat ADHD, they probably used the bottle to store the pills in." Nick nodded and was about to ask about Hodges frantic search earlier, when his pager went of.

"Duty calls. See ya later man." Hodges nodded and went back to his work.

Later had never come. Nick had been holed up in interrogation for the rest of the night, and noticed Hodges had already left. He moved in his seat and felt the dig of his wallet into his side. He stood to take it at and throw it next to his keys. Then searched through his other pockets. He had once forgotten to do this and the resulting laundry day had him cursing as his clothes were covered in watermelon flavored bubble gum. He felt into his front pocket and pulled out the folded piece of paper. Now he remembered, he was going to throw it away but had forgotten.

His curiosity getting the better of him he slowly opened the folded piece of paper and read its contents. After he finished he sat there for a moment stunned. Who would send something like this he thought, and more importantly who did it belong to.

David.

It couldn't be "superdave" David Phillips, he had a sweet girlfriend who worked in personal, and if he recalled correctly he just threw a surprise party for his mother's 60th, so it couldn't be him.

David. David. David.

Who?

Ohh... it couldn't be. Hodges?

D. Hodges. Oh my God of course it is. D. Hodges. David Hodges. Why didn't he think of that first. He had found the note in the hallway by the trace lab and Hodges just happened to be frantically searching for something. He couldn't blame him. It was lucky Nick had found it and not Eckiley.

So that means Hodges was gay? They way that man flirted with Catherine and spoke of his, what Nick knew was "imagined" prowess of women, he had believed the technician straight. Well that was interesting. Nick filed that bit of info into his mind for later. In the note it said his brother was dead. Hodges hadn't seemed to upset about that and Nick wondered how long it had been since Hodges had spoken to his family. From the tone of the letter they were clearly homophobic and wanted nothing to do with him.

Nick yawned and resolved that he would give the note back to Hodges tomorrow. It will be interesting he thought to see the man's reaction. Nick crawled into bed and closed his eyes. Interesting indeed.

----------

David was trying not to worry. After he had left Nick and calmed his nerves a bit he had returned to his lab. He reached into his pocket to possibly burn the note his "loving mother" had sent him, when he realized it was missing. He had searched all shift but had come up empty handed. Finally he had given up and headed home, hoping that if someone had found it, they merely disregarded it and threw it away.

He entered his apartment and sighed.

Eric.

He couldn't believe his brother was gone. At work he had misused the system a bit and was able to pull up his brother's police report. It had stared back at him mockingly. Eric Hodges, 22 apparent suicide.

It was hard for him to connect the smiling youth in the picture on his driver's license to the young boy who cried, when his father had physically thrown his older brother from their home. Thinking about it now caused his throat to close up and his eyes to mist over. He could remember playing ball in the yard, helping Eric with his homework, could remember those blue eyes so much like his own stare up at him at the age of two crying out Da'V reaching out little arms wanting to be held.

The last image bust the damn on his emotional walls of steel and he fell to his bed sobbing and cried himself to sleep.

Nick watched Hodges through the glass walls of his lab. He looked horrible, exhausted even, but no one seemed to notice. It must have finally caught up to him he thought. He watched as Hodges snipped at Sara and smirked a bit. Even at his worst, David still gave as good as he got. He paused. It had just occurred to him that he had referred to Hodges as David. He smiled, David... he liked calling him that. Out of the corner of his eye he saw Greg approach and returned to the evidence he was processing.

"Hey Nicky!" Greg slapped him on the back and bounced up beside them. "Are you ready for your vacation?" He asked. Nick shook his head. He had almost forgotten about his vacation, which Nick liked to refer to as his forced leave of absence.

"Yeah." He said sarcastically glaring at Sara in trace. Greg followed his line of sight and laughed.

"I don't know how she got out of it man. Maybe you should have asked her what her secret was." Nick snorted, he knew how Sara got out of her vacation. One word. Grissom, but Nick didn't believe that batting his eyelashes at Grissom would do him any good. He might be on his way to being gay or bi or whatever, but he was not going to go there.

"Nah, I think I'll just take off for a bit."

"See where the road leads you huh?" Nick laughed.

"Maybe." Greg shrugged.

"Well incase I don't see you later man, have a good time and I'll see ya in two weeks." Nick nodded and went back to work as Grissom poked his head in the door calling for Greg.

As he processed he decided he needed to talk to David. He just couldn't ignore the weary in the other man's face or the growing feelings he seemed to be developing for him.

About an hour to the end of shift Nick made his moved. He had wrapped up his case and was now just wandering down the halls waiting for the time clock to tick down. He walked into the trace lab and was happy to see David cleaning up in preparation for the day crew.

"Hey Hodges." He said as he walked over to the evidence counter and lean against it. David looked up a bit startled.

"Stokes." He said warily. "I've been done with your trace for hours, why are you in my lab?" David watched as Nick reached into his pocket and pulled out a folded piece of paper, a very familiar piece of paper."

"What do you want?" David asked his voice wavering a bit. Nick was surprised, he had expected David to argue with him, deny that he knew what Nick was talking about. He studied the man for a moment and started at the growing fear on David's face as the silence stretched out.

"Listen, David..." Nick started. He watched David's eyes grow wider at the mention of his name. "I'm not using this to get anything or to rat you out, or whatever else that clever brain of yours can come up with. I just want to understand what going on here man." David could feel his heart racing but let the panic lesson as he registered Nick's words.

"Why?" He asked. Nick sighed and looked around.

"I really don't want to get into this in the middle of the lab. Come out with me to breakfast after shift." He paused. "Please." David was torn. On one hand he didn't want anyone to know what was going on, but at the same time he needed to tell someone, anyone.

"I don't really want to sit in a diner discussing this." He finally said.

"Then follow me back to my place." David hesitated again then sighed.

"Fine." He spat. Nick nodded and moved to the door.

"Meet me outside after shift." David nodded and watched Nick leave. He sank to his stool when he was sure Nick was out of sight.

"Good God," he said, "what have I gotten myself in to."

Nick glanced into his rear view mirror to make sure David didn't bail on him. He had watched the man all during shift. He was surprised at how worried he was about him. He made a right and pulled into his drive. He got out of his car and smiled as David got out of his a look of apprehension on his face. Nick motioned for him to follow and they entered the house.

David took a moment to look around at Nick's house. It was neat which took David by surprised, not that he believed nick was a messy pig, but for a bachelor it was almost OCD neat. Nick motioned for him to sit on one of the stools at his kitchen counter.

Nick walked over to the fridge and started getting out the ingredients to make breakfast. He turned to look at David and shook his head.

"David. Man relax, you look like I'm about to feed you to the wolves." David scowled at him.

"What should I think, huh Nick? You have in your possession something that could ruin my career and possibly end my employment at the lab, so excuse me if I'm not a little on edge." Nick looked at him in surprise. Did David really think people disliked him that much.

"Do you really think I would do that?" He asked in a quiet voice, turning on his stove and fishing out something in the drawer next to him.

David didn't answer. He could hear the hurt in his voice, but he had been burned so many times that he couldn't trust Nick completely. Nick turned to look at him and pulled the note from his pocket. David watched as he carefully unfolded it and held it over the kitchen sink. Nick didn't look at David when he spoke.

"I know we may not have gotten along in the past, but I have never disliked you David. I may not have cared for your attitude, but you do damn good work at the lab. We wouldn't solve half the cases we do if it weren't for you." He paused and David saw him hold up a lighter. "I hope this proves it to you."

David drew in a sharp breath and watched as Nick set the letter on fire, and something inside him tore loose a little. Nick was never anything but honest, David knew that but for him to do this showed just how much he respected David.

Nick held on to the paper until the fire licked his finger then dropped it into the sink. He reached over and turned on the faucet, and the room was quiet as he and David watched the ashes wash down the sink.

"Thank you." David said his voice hoarse. Nick smiled.

"Well how about breakfast?" David nodded.

After Nick finished preparing breakfast, they sat down at Nick's dinning table. The atmosphere was relaxed even though it was quiet.

"I'm gay." David spit out his food and looked up at nick in astonishment. Nick laughed.

"What the fu.." David trailed off as Nick raised his hand to stop David's exclamation.

"I'm gay." He stated calmly. David just blinked in astonishment. How could Nick...

"I don't understand, what about those girls you've dated, the hooker, you can't fake that." Nick sighed and stared into his coffee cup.

"Well." He started. "I guess I might be bi, but in the last few years I have leaned more towards men." Nick smiled again and chuckled a bit. "Many people wouldn't believe it, but I know how to keep a secret." David couldn't speak. Nick was gay. He dated men. That was crazy.

"After I read the letter I wanted to talk to you, to let you know that I understand. That I know what it does to you on the inside to have to lock away a part of yourself. How much it hurts, how it can slowly kill you." He paused again taking a sip of coffee to clear his dry throat. "I think that it has been a lot worse for you than it has for me and I wanted..." He trailed off. "God, I just wanted to let you know you can talk to me. I want to help you David. I'm not out to hurt you." Nick reached over and grabbed his hand.

David looked up, up into those eyes so brown and sincere and let the whole ugly story spill out. When he was finished he realized they had ended up on the couch and that Nick's arms were wrapped around his shoulder and his head leaning against Nick's chest.

"I'm sorry." David said. Nick squeezed him tighter.

"For what?" He asked.

"For not trusting you." Nick shook his head.

"If I had been in your position I would have a hard time believing in people to David. No one but you knows about my preferences. I want to believe my friends will stick by me, but you never know."

"Well you know I won't be one of the ones turning on you." David snuggled deeper in to Nick and was surprised when arms wrapped around him tight.

"Thanks Dave." David could hear the waver in Nick's voice and tilted his head up to look at Nick. He sucked in a breath and slowly reached up to brush away a tear that had fallen down Nick's cheek. At his touch David saw Nick's eyes darken into a molten chocolate color. Nick whispered David's named then leaned down to brush his lips over his forehead, one cheek and then the other until finally just as David thought he might have to beg Nick brushed his lips against David's own. It was so soft David thought. Nick hovered before gently taking David's bottom lip sucking on it gently. Nick was in heaven, he had never felt anything like this before. He applied more pressure against David's mouth and was rewarded when those lips opened up under his own. He could taste David shaky sigh and wanted more. He delved his tongue into the waiting mouth. The kiss grew at a fevered rate until David felt he would die. His body was on fire and his lungs burned with a need for air that he was willing to ignore. Slowly Nick pulled away and watched as David tried to catch his breath. He marveled at how beautiful David looked at this moment, how blue his eyes were and Nick had to fight his overwhelming desire to pin David to the couch and have his way with him until neither one could walk, then do it all over again.

David laughed, a sound that send shivers of pleasure through Nick and warmed his heart at the same time.

"We're screwed aren't we." David asked. Now it was Nick's turn to laugh. He leaned down and kissed David again.

"Oh yeah." He said. "Big time."

They sat on the couch in a comfortable silence, the only sound their gentle breathing and the tick tock of the clock on the wall. David snuggled deeper into Nick's arms and sighed.

"Is it weird that this is so easy." David asked looking up at Nick. Nick chuckled and ran a hand through David's hair.

"Kind of... but I'm not complaining."

"I'm not either idiot." Nick laughed and pulled David until he was straddling Nick's lap. David gasped as Nick pulled David's lips down to his own. They separated and Nick smiled up at David.

"I'm glad you're not complaining." He ran his hands up and down David's arms and the tops of his thighs. "God David. I can't seem to keep my hands off you." David smirked and bent down to nibble on Nick's lower lip, sucking it in between his while his hands undid the first three buttons of Nick's shirt and then roamed inside to caress the toned flesh.

Nick inhaled sharply at the feel of David's hands and let his own sneak under David's shirt to touch his bare skin. David applied more pressure to Nick's lips forcing them open with his tongue. Nick was in heaven as he fought for control of the kiss, but David wasn't giving up without a fight. Nick braced his feet on the floor then pushed his lower half up forcefully grinding their erections together. David gasped and broke away. Nick used this distraction to his advantage and flipped them over until David was flat on his back and Nick was situated on top and between his legs.

David couldn't seem to catch his breath. He had been with other men before but none were able to set his body on fire like Nick.

"Nicky... oh God Nicky." Nick thrust against David heavily their jeans causing friction and pleasure so intense it was almost painful. David pulled Nick down into another heated kiss as he wrapped his legs around Nick's waist rising to meet him with every thrust Nick made.

Nick couldn't help but moan when he heard the breathy way David moaned his name. Although Nick was aware of his changing sexual preference he had yet to experience intimacy with a man. He couldn't stop himself he wanted David so badly. He opened his eyes and looked down and watched as David's blue eyes turned into smoky grey pools of lust as Nick moved against him. David squeezed his legs tighter around Nick. He watched David tense and his eyes squeeze shut as he came. The sight sent Nick over the edge and he collapsed on top of David.

"David." Nick said his voice horse. David opened his eyes and looked up into Nick's. "That was... I mean." He paused frustrated. David reached up and placed a hand on Nick's cheek.

"You've never been intimate with a man before." David guessed. Nick nodded and tried to duck his head, but David kept a firm grip on him.

"Are you worried about how good it was? Because this was better than any sex I have ever had." David smiled and lay back down bringing Nick's head to lie against his chest. Nick laughed.

"Good. I was worried. I almost came the first time I heard you whimper out Nicky...oh Nicky." David slapped Nick on the shoulder.

"Don't make fun." He pouted. Nick looked up into his face.

"I'm not. You better not call me Nicky at work mister. " He gave David a mock glare. "I can not be held responsible for ravishing you in the locker room if you do." David laughed then tensed.

"Shit!" He exclaimed.

"What?" Nick asked. David sighed.

"I forgot all about work. I haven't gotten any sleep. I'm going to be dead on my feet tonight." Nick nuzzled David's neck placing soft kisses here and there.

"Poor you." He said. David snorted.

"What? You think you're going to be fresh and energetic tonight?" Nick smiled into David's neck.

"I don't have to work, forced vacation remember?" David scowled.

"I did forget. Well since I am the unfortunate one on shift tonight I need to get home and try to get some rest." Nick proceeded to hold on to David tighter.

"Nicky" He said exasperated. "Nicky baby, I have to get up."

"Don't want you to." Nick said a bit childishly. He looked up at David and smirked. He crawled up David until his mouth was level to his ear.

"Davey." He whispered huskily pressing their bodies into one another. "Daveyyyyy oh Davey." David swallowed now understanding what Nick meant about calling out his name. Oh well he thought, as Nick reached for the button on his jeans, he didn't mind getting fired.

David was more than a little tired when he clocked in that night at the lab. After a very satisfying, not to mention emotional morning, David was trying his best not to act too happy. His brother's death still weighed upon him but with Nick's confession the guilt and grief had been equaled out with happiness. He still missed his brother.

As David worked throughout the night he tried to look back at the happy moments he shared with his family. There were few where his parents were concerned. They tended to leave Eric alone with the older David to go out to their many parties. He smiled to himself; he had practically raised Eric until college. After he came out he had tried to get his folks to let him visit Eric but they went as far as getting a restraining order so his hands were tied.

I missed out on so much, he thought. I didn't even know who he was at the end. He shook off those thoughts as Warrick brought in a new batch of trace. He smiled a bit wondering what Nick was doing.

~~~~~~~

Never let it be said that Nick couldn't be as sneaky as the next person. In fact he did sneaky very well. He knew people thought he was the all American golden boy, a title he hated with a passion, but the truth was he could scheme with the best of them. He knew of only one person who could help him put his recently devised deviously delicious plan into action, and he thought irritated, she was late.

"What's up this time Nicky-boy?" Nick smiled as Jacqui Franco slid into the seat across from him. He had arranged to meet her in the out of the way diner that they would frequent when they were plotting.

"Hello beautiful." Nick said smiling. Jacqui studied him closely. She order coffee from the waitress who had appeared when she sat down and then leaned back in her seat eyeing Nick with suspicion.

"What are you plotting Nicky. I haven't seen you so happy since we thought up that plan to lace Ecklie's coffee with ex-lax." Nick chuckled at the memory and took a sip of his coffee.

"Do I look that happy?" He asked. Jacqui snorted and then nodded her thanks to the waitress who had returned with her coffee.

"Nick." She started. "You're glowing. If I didn't know better I would think you just got laid." Nick smiled wider. Jacqui gasped and brought a hand up to her mouth.

"Who?" She asked.

"Now why would I tell you when half the fun is for you to guess." Jacqui paused and looked pensive. She let out a sigh and shrugged her shoulders.

"Fine. I'll play your twisted little game. Was it some random guy off the street?" Nick glared.

"You know me better than that."

"So it's someone you know?"

"Yep."

"Someone I know?" Nick shook his head yes. Jacqui's eyes bugged out.

"Someone from work!"

Nicks slow smile was her answer. Jacqui shook her head and took a sip of her coffee.

"I give up! No one but Bobby is openly gay and I know it's not him, he's married."

"Ah." Nick said. "That's true but you're close. Try three labs down the hall." Jacqui looked puzzled.

"Three labs down...that would be Trace..." She trailed off and looked at Nick in amazement. "David. David Hodges." Nick winked at her. "How? I thought only me and Bobby knew he was gay." Was all she could ask. Nick frowned and looked down into his coffee cup deep in thought.

"He got a letter. His brother died. His parents blamed David for it. They clamed his homosexual sickness rubbed off on his little brother." Nick paused. "He killed himself." Jacqui look at Nick in horror. "I found the letter; he had dropped it in the lab." Nick went on to explain yesterday mornings breakfast and how he and David had decided to start dating secretly since neither one was comfortable being outed yet. Jacqui sat back stunned.

"Well at least I know why he's been acting weird. I can't believe he didn't tell me." Nick set his empty cup down and shook his head. "He hasn't had the time. It was only yesterday and he's working right now and you're off so..." Jacqui nodded.

"Do you really like him Nick?" He smiled, he should have been offended, but he knew she was only looking out for her friend.

"I really, really do." She smiled.

"All right then, what do you need me to help you with?"

~~~~~~~

David was tired. Not quite as tired as if he had been pulling a double, but close. He opened his door and flipped on the light switch. Nothing happened. David tried it a few more times then sighed in irritation. Stupid bulb, it must have blown. He threw down his jacket and his keys and locked the door. His blackout curtains left the room pitch black but he knew he could maneuver around the furniture to his bedroom down the hall. When he reached the small hallway to the right of his kitchen he blinked. David never left the lights on when he went to work, so the faint glow coming from underneath his bedroom door was puzzling. He crept down the hall slowly. Could it be a robber he thought? Faintly he could hear some soft music as well. A robber that plays music while he steals maybe?

He turned the knob gently and cracked the door open, and then promptly lost his grip on the handle as well as most of his higher brain functions. The door creaked the rest of the way open and revealed a softly lit room, with music and a gloriously naked Nick Stokes sprawled across his bed covered only by a thin sheet placed over certain parts of his anatomy.

David's mouth went dry as Nick leaned up on one elbow and motioned him over.

"Hello Davy." His voice was low and smooth like silk. David had never been seduced before, dreamed about it, but it had never actually happened to him, until now. David slowly walked to the bed stopping a few inches away.

Nick sat up. "Now Davy that's much much too far away," and without any warning Nick pulled David unto the bed until he was straddling Nick's waist. David could feel Nick hard underneath him and groaned as Nick pressed up into him. David jerked Nick's mouth up to his, his fingers tight in Nick's hair almost pulling painfully as he devoured Nick's mouth. Nick's hands shook as he unbuttoned David's shirt, ridding him of the garment without breaking their kiss. David's hand wondered down Nick's slick torso and dipped below the bed sheet taking him into his hand. Nick gasped and broke the kiss.

"God Davy. I want you so bad." David pulled back and smiled down at Nick.

"Then have me Nicky."

~~~~~~~

Nick turned his head to the side and was greeted by the sight of a deep asleep David Hodges. Nick sighed and snuggled closer to his husband.

Man, he couldn't even begin to wrap his mind around it. They had been together six months before he had proposed. David had been surprised. It had been the night they had came out to Nick's parents. He brushed a hand down David's cheek and thought back to that nerve wracking evening.

Nick had never been so relieved. He knew his family loved him but he had been worried that this would upset them. He was glad to be wrong. So glad he thought as he watched David laughing with his parents across the room.

He was content to watch as he sat at the edge of the fireplace, Christmas music in the air and laughter all around.

"He's a cutie." Nick looked to his right as his oldest sister Jenny sat beside him. He smiled at her and nodded. She ruffled his hair.

"Awww. Nicky's in luvvvve." Nick glared at her briefly then turned his gaze back towards David. Jenny shook her head, her dark curls bouncing against her shoulders. "Hey." She touched his shoulder to get his attention. "I'm serious. Are you in love with him?" Nick smiled.

"I wouldn't have brought him here if I wasn't" Jenny nodded in agreement. She threw her arm around his shoulder.

"That's what I thought. So... another brother huh? One of you was enough you know." Nick rolled his eyes. Jenny smirked. "So I am getting another brother. When do you plan to propose?" Nick whip around in shock, his eyes wide. He quickly glanced over to David and saw he was deep in conversation with his dad.

"What was that?" Jenny teased cupping her ear and leaning close. Nick gently slapped the back of her head.

"You heard me, and I expect you to keep those other creatures who claim to be my sisters away from my part of the house." Jenny smiled.

"I was the only male in a house full of females. My dad felt sorry for me. So they converted the space above the garage into an apartment." Nick held the door open and let David walk in first. The room was neat and looked like what any normal studio apartment looked like. There was a door that led to a bathroom, one that led to a closet where Nick placed their suitcases, and a small kitchen to the side.

"This looks like what my first apartment looked like after my folks kicked me out," he paused, "only nicer." Nick chuckled a bit at David's easy smile and wrapped his arms around the man from behind nuzzling his neck and holding him tight.

"I'm glad I did too." He replied softly. He would have never imagined he would be standing in Nick's parents house with a warm and oh so sexy Nick Stokes wrapped around him, never in a million years. Yet somehow it had happened and in a twisted sense of irony he had his homophobic parents to thank for it. If they had never sent that letter... well who knows what would have happened.

They relationship hadn't been all smooth sailing. They had even broken up briefly and by brief he meant the fifteen minutes it had taken for Nick to turn his car around and run back to apologize to David.

David couldn't believe it. Six months of stolen kisses in the locker room, six months of passionate love making, six months of love, because that's what it was. He was so in love with Nick he knew he could never live without him.

"Hey." Nick placed a tender kiss on his neck. "What are you thinking about?" David sighed his smile growing wider.

"I was just thinking about that time Warrick almost caught us in the break room." Nick chuckled squeezing David tighter.

"Well if someone, who shall remain nameless, could keep his hands to himself and not on the inside of my thigh, I wouldn't of had to grope them under the table." David turned and gave Nick a messy kiss that ended with a loud smack. Nick smiled and brushed a hand down David's cheek.

"I have something for you." David raised his eyebrows as Nick rummaged through his suitcase. "Close your eyes." David obliged and felt nick slip something into his hand. It felt cold and metallic and David was puzzled. "Open your eyes Davy."

David did as he was instructed and looked down. He couldn't quite hold in the gasp he tried to suppress. In his palm lay a golden wedding band. He looked up at Nick who pulled him close.

"Will you marry me David Hodges. You are my life, my reason to get up every morning." Nick paused trying to swallow back his tears. "You are my light and my heart." David closed his eyes and leaned his forehead against Nick's.

"Yes." He whispered. "I can't live without you Nick. I don't even want to try." Nick leaned in and kissed him slowly, sweetly, lingering until they both thought they would burst. Nick pulled back and wiped the tears from his face as well as David's.

"Here." He took the ring. "Look." David peered inside the ring and smiled at their initials carved inside.

It had been a spectacular Christmas, but they had to wait another six months for the actual ceremony. They had it in Vegas even though it would not be considered legal. Nick's father had presided over the ceremony and all his family had attended along with the lab rats, who had been let in on the secret only if they promised to keep it to themselves.

"I wish Eric could have seen this." David said in the middle of the first dance as a married couple.

"I'm sure he can. Where ever he is." David nodded and they danced until the stars came out then retired for their honeymoon.

Nick snuggled into David's warmth causing the other man to stir. He opened his eyes and gave Nick a sleepy smile. Nick kissed him good morning. David yawned and stretched across the bed.

"So." Nick said. "What is the first thing you would like to do as a married couple?" David looked thoughtful.

"I want to go see Eric." Nick's heart nearly broke at the unshed tears in his husband's eyes. He pulled David even closer.

There was a slight chill in the air as they walked up the hill in between the gravestones. Nick pulled his coat a little tighter and looked over to the man walking beside him. As soon as they had stepped out of the car David had gone quiet. Nick understood his silence.

David was confused. He couldn't help but be grateful for Nick. He didn't know if he would have been able to do this on his own without breaking down, but even with Nick at his side he didn't know what he felt. Of course he was sad and a bit heartbroken...but he couldn't help but feel he was mourning a stranger.

They continued up and searched for a plot number and David was surprised at the lack of a headstone. In its place was a small metal plaque sticking up from the ground displaying Eric's name and the dates of his birth and death.

David and Nick stood side by side in front of Eric's plot. Nick jammed his hands into his pocket.

"Man...that's just cold." David nodded in agreement and kneeled down. He placed his hand on the ground and closed his eyes. He distantly felt Nick come to stand behind him and David unconsciously leaned back onto Nick's legs seeking out some sort of warmth. After a moment David sighed.

"They were cold people Nick." He paused. "They loved him. At one time they loved me, but not the right kind of love. As soon as we became something they didn't understand or approve of we weren't their children anymore. I don't know about Eric but they were never parents to me. They were just people I lived with who happened to contribute their DNA to make me." David sat down on the ground and felt Nick settle beside him as David continued talking.

"I can only assume that when they found out Eric was gay, even though he was dead, in their mind they did to him what they did to me. Still...the bastards could have given him a headstone." Nick nodded.

"Do you...do you want to get him one?" David looked over at Nick and smiled softly.

"Would you like a few minutes with him. I can wait for you by the car." David leaned over and softly kissed him.

"Thank you." Nick gave him an easy smile and left gently brushing his hand through David's hair. When Nick was out of sight David sighed.

"Hey Eric...I really don't know what to say. I am sorry. I should have tried harder to see you. I should have known, but I didn't" he paused. "I wish you would have came to me, we could've had fun in Vegas you know. Knowing how you were when you were little I bet you would have got into a lot of trouble." David laughed. "With my luck you would have probably turned out like Greg Sanders. I could see him influencing you with his evil ways and gravity deifying hair." David began to choke up, his words broken with sobs. "I'm sorry I failed you. I'm sorry I left you with those people. Please forgive me." David buried his face in his hands as the tears began to fall. He stayed like that until he felt a hand on his shoulder. Startled he turned to look behind him and found himself staring into a set of blue green eyes identical to his own.

"Wait, wait wait...what?" Greg threw his hand in the air and looked at Jacqui. "David's brother is alive?" Jacqui rolled her eyes.

"How is this possible." He asked. "You're dead." Eric smiled at his older brother and David was struck at how much they resembled each other. David had taken after his father and Eric their mother but it was clear that they were closely related. Eric looked a lot like David had, before his parents threw him out, before the stress, and before all the gray hairs. Eric pushed his black wire-framed glasses back onto his face from where they had slipped as he sat beside David.

"I was actually. Not for long but long enough." Eric pushed up the sleeves of his coat and David had a clear view of the scars on Eric's wrists. David sucked in a breath.

"David. After you left mom and dad just...I don't know, went nuts I guess. It was like every time I made a move that would analyze it." Eric screwed up his face and mimicked his mother's voice. "Eric don't talk to that boy you don't want to turn out like your brother David. or Eric gays are evil, or Eric that B+ isn't good enough." He paused to take a breath. "Nothing I did was good enough and they let me know it. It was like they still compared me to you even though they pretended you didn't exist."

"It's not your fault. By the time I was seventeen I knew I was gay. I remember when you tried to make up with mom and dad. When you were married to Kate. She's the one who told me you would be here. I had decided to find you a couple of weeks ago and I went to her."

"Why did you wait so long. I mean I've thought you were dead for a year now." David asked. Eric shrugged.

"After you and Dad had your last fight. They just got worse. They started questioning me on why I didn't have a girlfriend. Dad...he...he tried to force a women on me." David's eyes widened in shock. "Yeah it was pretty sick. I ran away. He apologized later but I just couldn't get past that he would do that. I was so happy when I left for school. I went to school in San Fran." Eric pulled on the grass by his feet.

"Things were really good the first two years. I was away from them and I could be myself you know." David nodded and smiled. "Then I met James. He was a sweet red-headed green eyed dork. I loved him so much. We meet in my Economics class and things just happened from there." The smile fell from his face.

"One day dad showed up. It was my third year and as you can guess he caught me and James together. He...he beat the crap out of me." Eric choked up a bit. "He said awful things to James and hit him when he tried to defend me. I felt so guilty. I hated myself, and James...he...he was so scared, he wasn't altogether comfortable with being gay in the first place. I guess seeing that he just decided it wasn't worth it and he left me." David put his arm around Eric's shoulder and pulled him close. Eric cried for a few minutes then wiped his face.

"I wanted to but I found out you had left LA and I had already decided to do this." He held up his wrists. "So I went back to my dorm and got drunk, then I did it. I just didn't want any of it anymore. My roommate found me, got me to the hospital and as you can see I didn't die." David looked at him confused.

"I didn't die but I was messed up. My roommate Steve knew what was going on. He explained what happened to his dad who happened to be the county medical examiner. They messed with the records a bit to show that I was dead. The plan was to let mom and dad believe it and then when I had gotten better someone would "find out" that my record was wrong and fix it." Eric laughed. "I have been among the living for a month now." David shook his head at the craziness of it all.

"They don't know and I'm not going to tell them. I found out mom is sick. They say she doesn't have much time, but I can't go see them not after what they have done." David nodded with a smirk.

"I was hoping you would say that." He paused. "So...who is that fucking fine man I saw you with earlier." David smirked and told him about the whirlwind of a last year he had.

"My God." Sara said. "His parents were awful. "No wonder Hodges doesn't open up to us." Everyone sat in silence for a few minutes absorbing the horror of David's home life.

Greg sat in his chair staring at the floor. He couldn't believe what he had heard. He sent a prayer to whatever God was listening that his parents and friends had been supportive in his bisexuality. Jacqui suggested they take a break so everyone could get something to drink. Greg wandered down the hall to the counter that held the coffee and fixed a cup, but instead of drinking it he could only stare into the cup.

"You know it's better if you drink it." Greg jumped at the sound of the deep voice behind him and turned to see a younger version of David standing in front of him. The stranger laughed. "I can see you know my brother." He held out his hand. "I'm Eric Hodges, but I think you already know that." Greg shook his head yes. Eric studied him from behind glasses with his blue green eyes. He looked Greg up and down and Greg found himself blushing. "Hmmm... sweet brown eyes, blonde streaked gravity defying hair, and cute. You must be Greg Sanders." His smile turned wolfish. "David's told me all about you."

"Wait, wait wait...what?" Greg threw his hand in the air and looked at Jacqui. "David's brother is alive?" Jacqui rolled her eyes.

"I was actually. Not for long but long enough." Eric pushed up the sleeves of his coat and David had a clear view of the scars on Eric's wrists. David sucked in a breath.

"Why did you wait so long. I mean I've thought you were dead for a year now." David asked. Eric shrugged.

"They don't know and I'm not going to tell them. I found out mom is sick. They say she doesn't have much time, but I can't go see them not after what they have done." David nodded with a smirk.

"I was hoping you would say that." He paused. "So...who is that fucking fine man I saw you with earlier." David smirked and told him about the whirlwind of a last year he had.

"My God." Sara said. "His parents were awful. "No wonder Hodges doesn't open up to us." Everyone sat in silence for a few minutes absorbing the horror of David's home life.

"Ummm yeah, Greg...I'm mean Greg is me. Oh God! I mean yeah I'm Greg, nice to meet you." He took Eric's offered hand. Eric gave it a small squeeze and Greg blushed. Eric smiled again.

"I'm sure David's told you some about me." Greg nodded. "I decided I wasn't going to deny myself what I want or who I am. Can you blame me?" Greg shook his head.

"Nah man. After what you've been through I can't blame you." Eric's smile returned and he leaned in closer to Greg.

"Soooo." Eric drawled out and Greg shuddered a bit. "You wanna go out with me sometime?" Greg, not to be outdone placed a hand on Eric's waist and leaned up to his ear.

"Anytime you want." He breathed and smirked as he felt Eric tremble. Greg leaned back and Eric coughed.

"So yeah um... cool." Eric rubbed his neck and tried to play off his blush. "How's Nick?" He asked. Greg's smile faded.

"He's okay. David is with him right now. Everyone is in the lobby waiting to see him. We've been passing the time listening to Jacqui tell us about how Nicky and David got together." Eric nodded.

"That's right she was the first one to know about them." Greg nodded. "Well" Eric said grabbing Greg's hand. "Let's go see how everyone is doing." Greg followed after him bemused and delighted at this turn of events.

David sighed and rubbed his face as he walked down the hall. He could hear the low sounds of talking as he reached the lobby. He paused, squared his shoulders and prayed to God Jacqui was done with her storytelling.

He had been sitting in his chair outside Nick's door when Nick's parents had come for their turn to visit with their son. Gillian had smiled at him and warned him about the story telling session going on. They promised to come get him after Nick was moved, but suggested he make an appearance as Nick wasn't the only one they were worried about.

As he stepped into the waiting room all talking stopped. He sighed. This was what he was worried about. He didn't want people to feel sorry for him. He had a good job, a loving husband, his newly alive brother, and good friends. He was lucky. He didn't need any pity.

"Hey Hodges." Sarah said patting the spot between her and Catherine. He rolled his eyes and she smiled even brighter. "So." She started. "You went and married and broke my heart. I thought I was your girl." David tried very hard not to smile.

"Wait, wait, wait." Catherine held up a hand. "I thought I was your number one woman." Everyone giggled. Grissom stood up very serious and cleared his throat.

"David. I thought I was your only one." Everyone was silent for a few seconds then David busted out laughing and everyone including Grissom followed suit. David doubled over and nearly fell out of his chair. He really had great friends, family really.

Greg and Eric walked in confused at all the laughter. The looked at each other and shrugged. David looked up as they walked into the room and noticed they were holding hands. Eric had been dying to meet Greg since David had told him about the former DNA tech. David smirked it didn't take Eric long at all.

"Hey guys what's so funny." Greg asked. The group paused then burst out laughing again.

It was a few hours later when the others had visited with Nick and left that he was alone with him again. David lay beside Nick resting. He had been so scared. Scared that he would lose the one person in all the world who loved him like no other. He felt a hand run through his hair and sighed. He looked up to find Nick staring at him his eyes soft with affection.

"Hey." Nick said softly. David smiled and reached up to softly kiss Nick on the mouth. "David. I love you so much. You were the only thing I could think of while I was in that box. The thought of seeing you again is what kept me going. I never want to lose you." David hugged Nick as tight as his injures would allow.

The room was packed, cheerful noises rang throughout as kids dashed from room to room. David looked down on it all from the second floor landing in the house him and Nick had bought after his burial. He felt strong arms wrap around him and leaned back into the warmth.

"Look at all of them." Nick whispered in his ear. "Who would have thought sarcastic, rude, arrogant, suck up..."

"...David Hodges, would be surrounded by family at Christmas, holding a terrific Christmas party." David shrugged then sighed.

"Not me. A few years ago it would have been me, a TV dinner, and a lot of alcohol." Nick squeezed him tighter. "I can't believe it sometimes, but I am thankful for it." He paused. "I'm so happy Nick. I have you, our friends, family I thought was gone." He looked over at Greg and Eric cuddled together by the fire." Nick nodded.

"Yeah we are lucky." David turned around to face Nick. He took Nick's face in his hands and kissed him gently on the lips.

"Thank you." David whispered. "Thank you for loving me, for not giving up in that box, for living." Nick leaned in and kissed him deeply. He broke away and rested his forehead onto David's.

"There's no need to thank me, you're all the thanks I need." He pulled back. "Merry Christmas." David smiled.