Title: Like Lettuce
By: Caroline Crane
Pairing: Nick/Greg
Rating: NC17
Summary: Post-ep for "Early Rollout". When you plant lettuce, if it does not grow well, you don't blame the lettuce.
A/N: The title makes sense if you're me.

He couldn't remember the last time he'd had such a bad day. It wasn't so much that Warrick had called him on his total lack of preparedness – that could have gone a lot worse, and it made him wonder what Warrick knew to make him go so easy on Greg.

The whole day hadn't been bad – at least he'd gotten out in the field, even if he had been totally unprepared and then embarrassed himself by hanging out at the wrong gate for twenty minutes. At least he hadn't had to work with Nick, and he'd never thought that would be a bright spot. Not working with Nick was what started this whole mess in the first place – sort of, anyway – but he was thankful Nick had spent most of the day with Sara.

It was a weird feeling, being glad his so-called boyfriend was ignoring him. But for once Greg was doing everything in his power to avoid Nick, so at least it wasn't blatantly obvious that Nick was avoiding him. Not that Greg thought anybody else would notice, but he would, and that was bad enough.

He finished restocking his kit, sterilized his instruments and found batteries for his flashlight. He made a mental note to stash an extra set of clothes – ones Grissom wouldn't find a reason to complain about – in his trunk, then he shoved the kit in the car and climbed in the front seat. All the way home he managed not to think about work or Nick or the fact that they hadn't talked about what happened and they probably weren't going to. In fact, Greg was probably single again, although he knew Nick was polite enough to tell him that much to his face.

So he could look forward to one last painful conversation, and when he pulled into his apartment complex parking lot and saw the familiar black truck he knew he wasn't even going to get a few hours' sleep before he had to endure that particular conversation. He could handle it – it wasn't the first time he'd ever been dumped for moving too fast, and if he was honest with himself he had to admit that he was to blame. He knew how Nick was, they'd known each other for years and Greg knew better than to push for things Nick couldn't give him.

Things Nick didn't want to give, more like, but Greg knew that going into this thing and he'd promised himself he was going to respect it. For once in his life he wasn't going to push, he was just going to take what he could get and not want more. It had taken him four years just to get Nick to agree to go out with him – he knew how careful Nick was about this stuff, how slowly he moved and how fast he'd be out the door if Greg started demanding things he wasn't comfortable with.

He wanted to blame the job. It was stressful to start with, but now that they never saw each other while they were working it was even harder for Greg to hold back when they were alone. And he knew it was just because their time together was so intense, but that didn't change the fact that he knew better.

So he'd fucked up the thing he'd wanted for...God, he couldn't even remember how long, and now all he really wanted to do was go to bed and not think about it for the next twelve hours. Only Nick was leaning against his apartment door when he got up the stairs, looking just as tired as Greg and just as determined to say whatever it was he felt he needed to say. Like Greg needed to hear the 'this isn't working out' speech. Like he hadn't already figured that one out all on his own. But apparently he needed a lot of hand-holding these days, people to tell him how to do his job and Nick to tell him exactly what he could and couldn't do in their relationship.

He laughed at the thought, the sound catching in his throat as he brushed past Nick to open the door. He waited until they were both inside, dropping his keys on the counter and ignoring the slight tremble in his hand that still snuck up on him when he let himself get too run down. "What do you want?"

Nick didn't answer right away, but Greg could hear him breathing back there, could almost feel Nick's breath on his skin and he refused to turn around and face the other man. He didn't want Nick to know how tired he was and just how much of it didn't have to do with the double they'd just pulled.

"Heard you had a rough day."

"Yeah? Who'd you hear that from?" He didn't have to ask – he knew the answer already…expected something like this, even. And the last thing he really wanted was another lecture on how bad he was at being a CSI, because if it wasn't for Nick he would have been prepared when he got to the crime scene.

"Warrick. I asked how you did and he mentioned that you didn't seem like you were taking your training very seriously." He'd been avoiding looking at Nick since they got inside, but at Nick's words he finally turned around, mouth open to argue. Before he got the words out Nick held a hand up to stop him from talking, mouth set in a determined line and Greg knew he wasn't going to win this argument. "I know it's not true, G. But I think we should talk."

"Why? You want to lecture me on how to do my job now? I restocked my kit. It's all cleaned and sterilized and alphabetized just like Warrick's. It's in the car, you want to see it?"

He knew he sounded bitter, but he couldn't help it. This was all Nick's fault – for showing up in the locker room two mornings ago, leaning in way too close considering anyone could walk in and smelling so damn good even after ten hours in the field. It was Nick's fault for whispering things that made even Greg blush, things he never in a million years thought Nick would have the balls to say. There was no way Greg could turn down an invitation like that – no reason he should, not when they'd been sleeping together for months now.

Maybe he should have taken care of his kit before he followed Nick home, but at the time it didn't seem like there would be any harm if he just came in early the next day and did it before shift. And maybe if he'd remembered to do it there wouldn't have been a problem, but that wasn't really his fault either.

"I didn't come over here to lecture you," Nick said, and when Greg heard the apology in his voice he tensed even more. He really didn't want to hear Nick say he was sorry, he didn't want to be let down gently or nod and act like it wasn't killing him when Nick asked if they could please go back to being just friends. It wouldn't be so hard if Nick didn't know exactly how he felt, but then, if Greg knew how to keep his mouth shut they wouldn't be having this conversation in the first place.

"Look, just save the speech, okay?" he said, the words tumbling out of his mouth before he could stop them. Not that it really mattered, because he'd already humiliated himself in front of Nick and nothing he said now was going to make it any worse. "I know what you're gonna say and I don't want to hear it."

He could still feel Nick's hands on him, smell cologne mingled with Nick as he leaned in and teased Greg's mouth open. He could feel the wall of Nick's foyer pressed against his back, the only thing holding him up as Nick methodically removed every inch of his clothes. If he'd kept his mouth shut they might be doing that right now, panting and hard and leaving bruises in their effort to get even closer, so close they couldn't tell one body from the other.

"You know." Nick sounded amused now, and Greg might take a swing at him if he didn't know Nick would let him. He'd just stand there and take it, because he was Nick and he had that whole martyr thing going on. Greg had been crazy to get involved with him – crazier than anyone ever accused him of, because Nick was the worst kind of boyfriend there was and Greg had fallen for him anyway.

"Yeah, I know. What, you think I haven't heard all this before? Don't flatter yourself."

Nick winced at that and Greg congratulated himself on scoring a point, but the victory felt a little hollow. He didn't really want to hurt Nick – it sounded appealing in theory, but what he really wanted was for Nick to tell him he was wrong, that he was stupid to let Greg leave the way he did. And he was stupid, because Greg was a catch and if Nick couldn't see that it was his loss.

He'd told himself that at least a hundred times in the past thirty-six hours. So far he still wasn't buying it.

"I didn't come here to break up with you."

It wasn't like he'd never had his heart broken before. Granted, it was a little different this time, because he'd really thought…wait. "What?"

"I said I don't want to break up. Look, G, I shouldn't have let you leave that way. It's just…when you said…"

"I love you," Greg supplied when Nick trailed off, coloring a little and Greg wondered if Nick had ever said that to anyone and meant it. He wondered if anyone had ever said it to Nick before Greg, and suddenly he felt a little bad for leaving the way he did after he said it the first time. "I said I love you."

"Yeah, I know." Nick took a deep breath and looked down at the floor, hand on the back of his neck the way he always did whenever he was gathering his thoughts to say something he thought was really important. It was one of his cuter habits, and Greg barely caught himself before he started grinning like an idiot. Getting ahead of himself was what had gotten him into this mess in the first place, and he wasn't going to make that mistake twice. "It just took me by surprise. I wasn't expecting it."

"Yeah, well, I wasn't exactly expecting to say it." It was true – it had just sort of fallen out of his mouth naturally, and they both knew he meant every word of it. It would have been better if he'd said it during sex, because at least that Nick could write off as the heat of the moment. He'd thought it enough times during sex that he was almost surprised he hadn't blurted it out before now, but when he finally got around to saying it they'd just woken up, tangled together and warm in the center of Nick's bed, Nick's fingers trailing over Greg's scars in that way that made Greg think Nick cared more than he let on.

So it was all Nick's fault, really, because if he wasn't so fascinated with Greg's scars none of this would have ever happened. It was his fault for acting like he really did care, like Greg meant more to him than just the nearest convenient warm body. It was his fault for laughing at Greg's jokes and keeping his eyes open when they fucked, for saying Greg's name when he came and for touching him in that way that screamed 'I'm crazy about you'.

"Greg…" Nick trailed off, at a loss for words again and Greg really did want to hit him this time, or maybe just kiss him until he forgot what they were talking about. Because this was stupid – they had a good time together, and there was no reason three words people said all the time should ruin that. Only they were ruining everything, and if Greg wasn't careful they were going to ruin his career too.

"Look, just forget it, okay? Momentary lapse of reason, I'm over it. You don't have to worry about me screwing up at work and making people ask questions. I got the message loud and clear, from you and Warrick. So you can…"

"G," Nick interrupted, closing the distance between them to grab Greg's shoulders and squeeze. "Would you shut up for a second and let me say this?"

For a second he considered arguing, saying no, that he didn't need to hear it. He didn't need to give Nick the satisfaction of letting him down gently, but Nick looked so determined that he knew it would be faster and probably less painful to let Nick say his peace and go. "Fine. Hurry up, would you? I'm beat."

Nick frowned at that, his hands leaving Greg's shoulders. "You're exhausting, you know that? Jesus, G, I'm not trying to break up with you, I already told you that. I've been trying to talk to you about this all day but every time I saw you, you turned around and took off in the other direction. Look, it's just…"

"Let me guess – nobody's ever told you they love you before."

"No. I mean yeah…I mean sure. But I've never wanted to say it back before."

For a second Greg was sure he'd heard wrong, but Nick was smiling at him in that hopeful way he usually reserved for trying to cut in front of Catherine in the evidence queue, and Greg couldn't help hoping he meant what it sounded like he meant. His heart was lodged so firmly in his throat that he had to clear it twice before he found his voice again, and when he finally did he hoped it wasn't shaking as much as he thought it was. "You…then why'd you let me leave?"

"I don't know," Nick answered, and that much Greg could believe, because Nick wasn't always as smart as he pretended he was. "It kind of threw me, I guess, and by the time I figured out what I wanted to say you were gone."

And God, this really was all his fault, because if he'd just stayed and forced Nick to deal with him none of this ever would have happened. So maybe he was just as much of an idiot as Nick, but he wasn't going to admit that out loud. "What was it?"

"What was what?"

"What you wanted to say," Greg prompted, giving in to the urge to smile for the first time since he found Nick on his doorstep. "What was it?"

Nick rolled his eyes, but he had to know Greg wanted to hear it. He needed to hear it after all this, and this conversation wasn't going any further until Nick said it out loud.

Greg held his breath as Nick took two steps forward, one hand coming up to rest on his shoulder. Nick's other hand framed his face, thumb stroking down his jaw and if this wasn't potentially the biggest moment of his life Greg would have laughed at Nick for being such a predictable romantic. He tried and failed to fight back a smirk, but Nick was grinning back at him so it didn't really matter.

When Nick leaned in Greg was tempted to stop him, to make him say it before they started anything he couldn't stop. But he'd never expected this to happen again, and Nick was warm and solid and…God, even after a double he smelled good. Greg had no idea how he did that, but he wasn't about to ask now. Instead he leaned in and met Nick halfway, parting his lips and fitting their mouths together for a long, slow kiss.

It was so soft that he almost didn't catch it, but then Nick murmured it again, against his mouth and Greg's heart skipped a beat when he registered the words. He pulled back to look at the other man, one hand gripping the front of Nick's shirt like he thought maybe Nick was going to make a break for it. Only his hands were still on Greg's skin, thumb still stroking over a day's worth of stubble and if Greg was dreaming he didn't ever want to wake up.

His hand tightened reflexively on the front of Nick's shirt, hauling him forward until they were passing the same breath back and forth. "Say that again."

Nick grinned, the affect a little weird from this close up, and it was all Greg could do not to give in to the urge to cut him off with another kiss before he had a chance to say anything.

"I love you."

"Of course you do," Greg answered, ignoring the hammering of his heart as he pushed Nick back toward his bedroom. "I'm irresistible."

"And modest."

"Don't forget brilliant."

"Nobody could forget that, G," Nick said, laughing as he worked on getting Greg out of his clothes. "You'd never let them."

"There's nothing wrong with having pride in one's accomplishments."

"So that's what they're calling it now?"

He couldn't let an insult like that slide, but before Greg could come up with a suitable response Nick was kissing him again and Greg decided maybe it wasn't worth arguing about. At least not right now, because Nick's hands were on his back and his shirt was…somewhere behind them, along with his shoes and his jeans and one sock. Greg paused long enough to push his boxers off, losing the other sock in the process before he pushed Nick back onto the bed.

And this was definitely better than talking about how smart he was – naked Nick was always better than talking, especially when he was hard and thrusting lazily against Greg, hands on Greg's hips as he moved them in slow circles. A little awhile ago he'd been so tired all he could think about was crawling into bed and forgetting the world outside his bedroom existed; he wanted to ignore the world even more now, but sleeping was the last thing on his mind. In fact, the only thing on his mind was how he was going to find the lube without breaking contact with Nick.

He was pretty sure it was in the room somewhere, because they'd used it the last time they'd ended up at his place and he didn't remember putting it away. Which meant it was either tangled in his sheets or on the floor – he sent up a quick prayer for the latter, because if it was somewhere in the bed they'd probably never find it.

When Nick's hands slid up his sides Greg leaned forward, hesitating long enough to take in dark, lust-glazed eyes before he closed the distance between them to kiss Nick again. He wanted to ask Nick to say it again, over and over until he finally believed he wasn't dreaming. He wanted…a lot of things, things he might never work up the courage to ask Nick for. But he'd gotten more than he ever thought he was going to get today, and the rest could definitely wait.

Strong hands trailed over his back, cataloging the scars Nick seemed so fascinated with as Greg rocked against him. He shivered when Nick's thumb found a sensitive spot, breaking the kiss to gasp and press down harder. And what he really wanted was Nick inside him, so he untangled himself from the other man long enough to climb off the bed and find the lube. He picked a condom up off his nightstand before he climbed back onto the bed again, straddling Nick's hips and pressing the bottle into Nick's hand.

"Pushy," Nick said, laughing when Greg growled and grabbed his hand. He flipped the bottle open and poured clear liquid onto Nick's fingers, lifting his hips and letting out a sigh when Nick's hand closed around his cock. Not exactly what he'd had in mind, but he wasn't going to complain. He couldn't find the words even if he wanted to, because Nick's hand was warm and slick and it was so easy to thrust up into his fist.

For a few seconds he closed his eyes and just rode the sensation, sparks going off behind his eyes each time Nick's thumb brushed across the head. It wasn't nearly enough, though, and finally he forced his eyes open to find Nick watching him. Just for a second he was positive he could come from that alone, but there was no way he was going to come too early and ruin his plans. He wanted Nick inside him when he finally let go, wanted to feel Nick's pulse through his cock and hear Nick moan when Greg tightened around him.

He reached for the lube again, slicking his own fingers this time and reaching behind him to slide one inside. It was a weird angle, and by the time he worked his finger halfway in his back was arched and his whole body was flushed. He shifted his legs just a little further apart, pushing his finger a little further inside before he pulled out again and started over with two fingers this time.

"Jesus," Nick whispered, voice choked and he let go of Greg's cock to grip his hips again. For a minute he just watched, thrusting unconsciously against Greg as he rode his own fingers. And he liked watching Nick watch him, but he liked it even better when Nick participated, so he didn't complain when Nick growled low in his throat and flipped them over until Greg was trapped underneath him.

"You were really looking for me all day?"

Nick's mouth was pressed against his neck, and he murmured something against Greg's skin that sounded vaguely like 'yes'. Greg smiled and ran a hand through Nick's hair, stroking gently a few times before he tightened his grip and pulled Nick's head up to look at him.

"Were you going to give me that little speech right in the lab?"

"No," Nick answered, but before Greg had time to look disappointed he leaned in to plant a placating kiss on Greg's jaw. "Because I couldn't tear all your clothes off at work, and we both know that's exactly what would have happened."

He couldn't really argue with that considering he was flat on his back under a very naked Nick, so instead he thrust his hips up hard and surprised a moan out of the other man. "Point taken. So are you gonna show me what else you couldn't do in the lab or what?"

Nick rolled his eyes but stretched his arm out to pick up the condom Greg had dropped on the mattress, tearing the package open and shifting long enough to roll it on. When he was done he reached for a pillow and nudged Greg's hip until he took the hint, flipping over and lifting his hips far enough for Nick to push the pillow in under him. He pushed his knees apart as Nick settled between them, closing his eyes and letting out a moan at the first press of Nick's cock inside him.

Warm hands slid up and down his back, and someday he was going to work up the nerve to ask about Nick's scar fetish, but not now. Now all he could do was hold on, hands fisted in the sheets as he pushed back into each of Nick's thrusts, gasping every time Nick found that spot deep inside him that made sparks flash behind his eyes. He knew he was babbling something, but he couldn't focus long enough to hear the words and anyway it didn't matter anymore because he'd already said it, and the world hadn't come crashing down around him.

He shifted just enough to slide a hand around his cock, rocking back and forth between Nick and his own fist. Nick's hands slid down his back to grip his hips, fingers pressing against his skin and Greg pushed back one last time, his orgasm taking him by surprise. He vaguely registered Nick stilling behind him, and there was that moan when Greg tightened around him. He waited until Greg stopped shuddering to thrust again, over and over until Greg was sure he was going to pass out from the waves of pain-pleasure coursing through him.

Just when Greg thought he couldn't hold himself up for another second Nick thrust in one last time, letting go with a final, undignified grunt. Greg laughed and collapsed against the mattress, pulling Nick with him to drape across his back. He was heavy and too hot and slick with sweat, and Greg wanted to stay just where they were forever. He didn't care if he never breathed again, as long as Nick didn't go anywhere.

It was a long time before either of them moved, and when Nick finally shifted off him Greg rolled onto his side to watch him climb off the mattress. A minute later he was back with a washcloth, wiping Greg clean before he tossed it on the floor and climbed back into bed.

"Shower?" Greg asked, although the last thing he felt like doing was standing up. He wasn't even sure if he could stand up, because his legs were still shaking a little and he wondered vaguely if he'd managed to develop yet another tremor.

"Later," Nick murmured, already half asleep and Greg grinned and slid a little closer. He caught the arm that reached out for him, pulling it around his waist and tucking himself in against Nick's chest. Later…later had a nice ring to it, he decided, closing his eyes and relaxing into Nick's touch. It was one of those words that could mean a lot of things, but as long as Nick was still here when Greg woke up, it could mean whatever Nick wanted.