Title: Positive
By: BflyW
Summary: Greg is in the hospital - Nick goes to see him... ANGST!
Thanks again to the lovely Anmani for beta!
Characters: Nick, Greg
Genres: angst
Rating: G
Warnings: none
A/N: Inspired by an episode of ER, well pretty much a direct steal of the plot! Live with it!
Disclaimer: I own none of the characters... actually, I own nothing much at all...

The doors slides open and let him into the pulsing heart of the ER at Desert Palm Hospital. His heart is beating faster than the pulse in this place and he isn't sure his breathing can keep up with him. The nausea is overwhelming as he leans against the counter asking the nurse to direct him to Greg.

Greg.

Greg is hurt.

Greg is wounded. He needs to find Greg. Greg is somewhere behind these walls and he cannot find him. He needs to find him. He needs to see if he's okay. He needs to touch him, smell his breath and taste the salt of his skin. He needs to see for his own eyes that he is okay, that he will stay with him for years still to come. Forever. Always and forever. Any minute less of eternity is too short.

Greg is wounded.

"What was the name, sir?"

"What?" Nick tuned into his surroundings again and focused on the man in front of him.

"The man you are looking for, what is his name?"

"Sanders, Greg Sanders."

The man worked his fingers over the keyboard focusing on the screen in front of him.

"Sanders?"

"Yeah... He came in about 30 minutes ago. Hit by a car..."

"He is not in the system. How old is he sir?"

"Huh?"

"How old?"

"31."

"How does he look?"

"Slender. Blond hair; spiky. Brown eyes."

"We did get in a hit and run, a John Doe, by that description. Hang on and I'll get the attendant doctor for you."

"How is he?"

"I can't..."

"Is he okay?"

"I can't tell you..."

"Please, tell me. Is he okay. Where is he?"

"Sir, I can't give you any information until we have identified the body!!"

Identify the body.

No!

NO!!!

His legs disappear underneath him and he doesn't even notice his stomach content coming up until it hits the floor.

He can't be.

Not. No!

Not dead! Not Greg! Not enough time! They haven't had enough time! There is so much to say, so much to do! Not enough! He needs to turn back time. He needs to come in here again and get better news. He needs to. God he needs breathe. He can't breathe.

"Sir."

He wants to scream. Is he screaming? Is the sound coming out of his mouth or is it only contaminating his brain? He cries. He howls. He is definitely screaming now.

No!

It isn't possible.

Not Greg.

Not Greg.

Not his love.

Not the one he can't live without!!!

No.

He won't go on without him.

He can't breathe without him.

Identify the body.

He looks at the lockers. He doesn't even know how he came to walk in here.

Did he walk?

He is here.

He is looking at the lockers.

He has seen them before. Not here; at the morgue, Doc Robbins.

He is looking at the lockers, he doesn't see doc Robbins anywhere.

He's not at work, he is looking at the lockers that contains his reason to live.

Identify the body.

The body.

No not a body; Greg.

Greg, his Greg.

"Take your time sir", the ME pulls the blanket away.

Not.

It's not.

"That's not Greg."

His words are barely louder than a whisper. He is not sure that he experiences this or if it is his brain not accepting the truth and altering his perception.

"What?"

"That isn't Greg!"

"Are you sure?"

"Positive."

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"I am sorry sir. We made a huge mistake. We had two John Does today; both blond, both in their 30's, both from a car accident. Apparently there has been some lack of communication and the nurse talking to you did not know about Mr. Sanders. I am so sorry."

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His legs are hurting and his head is pounding. He hasn't cried as much since he was five and his favourite football was bitten to pieces by the neighbour's dog. He only wants to get home and catch some sleep. He is going to sleep alone tonight, but he will get some sleep knowing Greg is safe in the hospital and on his way to full recovery.

It is only as the doors are about to shut behind him that he catches a glimpse of them; the family; the mother and two children that cry; the family that has to identify the body. The family that will make the positive ID. And he cries with them, and at the same time he feels a sting of guilt for being relieved that it is them and not him.