Title: Realization
By: Tiffany F
Pairing: Horatio/Eric
Rating: AO
Summary: ***SPOILERS SEASON 7 Episode TIPPING POINT*** Eric realizes something that had been hiding in him for years. He was in love with his boss. And he wasn't going to wait another second to tell him. I don't own these guys and am only playing around.

“I have to try, Eric.”
 
The voice echoed in his head as he watched Horatio Caine run across the yard and up into the house where there was a bomb set to explode in under half a minute. Eric’s heart and mind raced as he watched the monitor in his hands, as he saw Horatio appear in the camera’s line of sight, and as the red head ran back out as the house exploded. Eric was knocked to the ground by the force of the explosion and he sat up as quickly as he could to make sure that Horatio and the girl were okay. He only started breathing again when he saw that they were.
********************
 
After everything was over, after all the paperwork was finished and Horatio had checked up on the progress at the Reverend’s house, he went home. It wasn’t until thedoor shut behind him and he had changed into a pair of shorts and a t-shirt that he let the shakes that had been threatening since he learned there was a victim in the house overtake him. He sank onto the sofa in his den and closed his eyes trying to think of anything other than the beat of his own heart as he ran into a building that was wired to explode. The sound of Eric’s voice echoing in his head as he ran towards what could easily have been his own death.
 
He wasn’t sure how long it was from the moment he collapsed until he heard the knocking on his front door, but Horatio knew that he had to pull himself together before he answered the door. He had to be the in-control lieutenant.
 
“Eric.”
 
“H.”
 
The younger man shifted his weight a little and really looked at his boss. On the surface Horatio looked like he always did, minus the suit and sunglasses, but he could see a lurking terror in the blue eyes. It was as if Horatio realized how close he’d come to dying as well – and was as shaken as Eric.
 
“Come in,” Horatio said with a smile. “Are you okay, Eric?”
 
“H, don’t do this,” Eric said. He closed the door and wrapped the older man in a tight hug. “Don’t do this to me. Don’t think that you always have to be strong around me. I see the same darkness you do and am just as affected by it as you are. I’m here, H. Fall apart and I swear I’ll be there to catch you just like you’ve always been to catch me.”
 
Horatio leaned his head on Eric’s shoulder and let the tears he’d been holding back fall. His arms wrapped around Eric’s waist and returned the hug. It had been years since he’d let anyone see him fall apart after a case, since Speed died and Horatio was tired of always having to be the strong one. The one who held the team together. The father figure to everyone and he was relieved to finally be able to share some of the load. Horatio wasn’t surprised that it was Eric who came to talk to him. Not after the stunt Horatio had pulled earlier in the day, but he also knew that Eric understood why he’d done it. Neither of them would be able to just stand by and let an innocent die if they could do something about it – and Horatio had been closer.
 
“I’ve got you, H,” Eric was whispering as he rocked his friend a little. “I’ve got you now and you’re never going to have to hide from me again. Let it go, H. Let it all go.”
 
“Eric.”
 
“Yeah?”
 
“Why?”
 
“Because I realized something when I saw you vanish into the house, H,” Eric said. He rested his head against Horatio’s cheek and closed his eyes as well. “I realized that I love you, love you so much deeper than as a friend or family and it would kill me to lose you. That it did kill me when I thought you were dead, taken out by a sniper bullet. I guess I just didn’t know what it meant then.”
 
“You shouldn’t. It’s only a matter of time until one of my enemies takes me out,” Horatio whispered. “And being close to me is a death mark.”
 
“H, you didn’t kill Speed,” Eric said. He let his lips brush Horatio’s damp skin. “You didn’t get me shot and you didn’t kill your brother. We all knew and know about the dangers of working in this city. I refuse to let anything scare me away from being here for you in whatever capacity you’ll let me, for as long as you’ll let me.”
 
Horatio lifted his head and stared into the deep chocolate brown eyes. He reached up with a shaky hand and wiped away a tear that had spilled over and was running down Eric’s cheek. “Tim was the only one who ever seemed to know how much of a burden I carry,” he said. “The only one until today. I never had a chance with him; I realized too late that what I felt for him was returned. But I don’t want to miss that chance again.”
 
“Then take it,” Eric said. “Take everything I’m offering, H.”
 
The red head stared into Eric’s eyes for another moment before he let his hand slip around behind Eric’s head to hold him in place while he kissed him, softly – so softly at first that their lips were only just touching. Eric stayed in place, somehow sensing that Horatio needed to be able to move at his own pace. He could feel his new lover shaking and started moving them slowly backwards.
 
“Left,” Horatio whispered before he deepened the kiss. Eric moaned softly as Horatio’s tongue ran over his lower lip and opened his mouth in an invitation that Horatio was only too happy to take. They bumped into a wall and stayed there for a moment as their tongues started to become a little more bold in exploration, tangling together as they moved from one mouth to the other and back again. Eric moved a hand up into Horatio’s hair and intentionally messed it up a little.
 
“Love it when your hair is messed up,” Eric murmured. He pulled back a little and let Horatio slip his shirt over his head. “Love working with you outside in the wind.”
 
Horatio ducked his head and glanced up with a small smile. Eric pulled Horatio back in and claimed his mouth in another kiss, starting to move them back towards the bedroom. He broke away from Horatio and looked around the room he’d maneuvered them into. “Huh?”
 
Horatio couldn’t help but rest his head against Eric’s shoulder again and just laugh. “Eric, maybe you should let me lead,” he said.
 
“Yeah, shower sex is good, but a little more advanced than what I was thinking,” Eric said with another glance at the bathroom. “Nice shower curtain though.”
 
“Thank you,” Horatio smiled. He took Eric’s hand and kissed it gently. “We can try it out in the morning, if you want.”
 
“Oh I want,” Eric said. “In fact, if you’ll point me in the right direction I’ll show you exactly how much I want.”
 
“I’m sorry I scared you today,” Horatio said. He shifted behind Eric and gave his lover a little shove. “The last door on the right. Strip for me and I’ll be right there, okay?”
 
“You’re not having second thoughts about this, are you?”
 
“No, I just need to get some things from the bathroom,” Horatio replied. “I’ll be right there, Eric. I promise you that.”
 
Eric turned and kissed Horatio again before walking down the hall. He could feel intense blue eyes watching him and let his ass wiggle a little more than it usually did as he moved away from his new lover. Eric wondered if Horatio had been able to figure out that he’d never been with another man before, and wondered if his nerves would overtake him at any point. All Eric wanted to do was help Horatio forget about work for a while, and also reassure both of them that he was still alive.
 
He slipped off his jeans, underwear, socks and shoes leaving them to one side of the door where he was sure Horatio wouldn’t trip over them and moved to the bed. Eric moaned softly as he settled back against the mattress – it was a waterbed. He grinned as he got settled; it was a good thing he didn’t get seasick because he hoped the bed was going to be doing a lot of moving very, very soon.
 
Horatio had stripped down to his boxers in the bathroom, leaving his suit in the smaller closet there so he could take it to the cleaners in the morning. He paused in the door and frankly stared at the young man in his bed. Eric was lying dead center of the bed rocking a little – Horatio could hear the bed sloshing slightly – with two pillows under his head staring at the door intently. The chocolate eyes lit up when they caught sight of Horatio in the doorway and Eric held out his hand to Horatio.
 
“I need to tell you something, H,” Eric said as his lover settled on him, weight pushing on him in all the right places.
 
“I know, Eric,” Horatio said. He leaned down and started nipping along Eric’s jaw. “I know and I want you to tell me if anything I do makes you uncomfortable or you want to stop. I swear I won’t hurt you, but you need to talk to me, okay?”
 
“How’d you know?”
 
“You tensed a little when I took off your shirt,” Horatio said. He licked to sooth a sharp nip to Eric’s chin and moved back up to his mouth. Eric moaned softly and opened to Horatio immediately, letting his tongue back in to play. Horatio took his time to learn his lover’s taste and the feel of Eric’s mouth. They broke apart panting and Horatio started downwards. Eric squirmed under Horatio’s knowing touch as hot spots were awakened and discovered, blood rushing into his cock, making him hard. Horatio smiled against Eric’s chest and nipped at a nipple, moving with the arch against him. “How you doing?”
 
“Good,” Eric moaned. He managed to raise his hands up to play with Horatio’s fiery red hair. The silky strands slid through his fingers and he smiled a little, just happy that the older man had relaxed a little. “H, if you do that things are going to end really soon.”
 
“You’re young,” Horatio said. He grabbed the lube and started warming it in his hand. “I think there’s a good chance you’ll be coming more than once tonight.”
 
“If nerves don’t kill things,” Eric said. He lifted his head and looked down to see exactly what Horatio was doing. “Can you talk me through this?”
 
“I can if you want me too, but there are other things my mouth could be doing while I get you ready for me,” Horatio replied. He licked the tip of Eric’s erection. “What do you thin, Eric? Talk or suck?”
 
“You want me to make a decision now?”
 
“Get my attention if you want me to talk,” Horatio smiled. He slicked his finger and moved it into position, just teasing the opening to Eric’s body as he steadied his lover’s erection with his other hand and started sucking on the head. He listened to the tone and level of noise Eric was making and when he heard what sounded like his name, he pushed his finger forward, breaching Eric for the first time. Horatio held still until Eric’s body relaxed around him and then started moving, spreading the lube as best he could as well as getting Eric used to the feel of something in his body.
 
“H,” Eric moaned as the finger inside him ran over something that made his whole body light up. 
 
Horatio pulled back and reached for the lube again. “Did you like that, Eric?” he asked in a low tone. “Are you ready for more?”
 
“Yeah,” Eric replied.
 
“Spread your legs apart a little more,” Horatio said. He helped Eric get into position and pushed two lube slick fingers back into his lover’s body. He went back to sucking on Eric’s cock as well, wanting to get his lover to climax as he knew it would help him relax enough to make the pain minimal. There was no way to make Eric’s first time completely painless. They’d have to train the muscles to stretch out, but he could make it as easy as possible.
 
Eric’s body tensed up when Horatio’s fingers pressed on and rubbed his prostate as he took Eric’s cock into his throat. Horatio swallowed as much as he could and sat back. He took in the sight of Eric’s relaxed body stretched out on his bed, the younger man gasping for air as he floated a little. Eric didn’t even seem to notice when Horatio added a finger and more lube.
 
“That was amazing, H,” Eric murmured. He shifted a little. “How many fingers are in there?”
 
“Four,” Horatio said, having just added another finger. “How do you feel, Eric?”
 
“Full,” Eric smiled. “What about you, H?”
 
“Don’t worry about me, I’ll be okay here in a minute,” Horatio replied. He managed to get the condom open with one hand and Eric helped him roll it on and slicked it with lube. He made the switch from his fingers to his cock as quickly as he could, not wanting to give Eric a chance to start closing back up on him again. “Wrap your legs up around me.”
 
Eric hadn’t realized exactly how much, not exactly pain but pressure and stretching would be involved and was trying to adjust to the fell of something so hard and thick inside his body. It was a strange feeling and he wasn’t too sure why anyone would enjoy it.
 
Up until the point that Horatio’s cock slid over his prostate and send shockwaves through his body. Nerve endings started coming to life as Horatio moved in Eric’s body and Eric could feel his own cock starting to come back to life. Horatio shifted back a little onto his knees and slid his hands under Eric’s hips, lifting his lover up and changing the angle of penetration before thrusting back in a little more sharply than before. Eric cried out and reached for his erection to start stroking it as fast as he could. He wanted to get caught up to Horatio, to not lose the fantastic feelings shooting through him. The only thing that would be better would be if he could kiss his lover, but it was such a minor detail that he knew that they’d be able to kiss the next time, as often as he wanted and he didn’t want to bring it up.
 
Horatio cracked open his eyes and gasped in as much air as he could. He could feel his climax building in his gut with every thrust. His fingers dug into Eric’s ass as the younger man came for a second time, the tight contractions enough to push Horatio over the edge as well.
 
Eric caught his lover as he fell forward and held Horatio through the shuddering aftershocks, peppering kisses along Horatio’s cheek and upper jaw. “I love you, H,” he whispered. “And I’ll always be here.”
 
“I love you too, Eric,” Horatio murmured against Eric’s sweaty neck. “I love you too.”