Title: So Many Similitaries
Author: Bj Jones
Rating: FRM
Disclaimer: I don’t own them. They are owned by various executives, producers, studios, and writers who have more lawyers on retainer than I ever want to mess with. I’m not making any money, just borrowing them for a little bit… I swear.
Summary: An old lover pushes Horatio into the arms of a new one.
Beta: White Wolf (Speed) – my sis
Author’s Note: This is part of a large series. So each chapter/story is part of the large universe. It won’t necessarily be in order.
Genre: Slash
Challenge: 3 Way – House/CSI: Miami
Prompt: T6P32 - Sarcasm
Word Count: 2595

~*~

The case had been fairly straight forward; a young woman found dead in the back room of a night club. There was evidence of sexual assault along with bruising around her neck indicating she'd been strangled. They were short handed, so Horatio had the rare opportunity to work alone with Speed. He enjoyed working with the younger man, his snarky remarks always put a smile on H's face.

Timothy Speedle reminded him of an old lover back in New York. He would pay good money to see Gregory and Speed in a snark war. Though his ex-lover's snark had a more biting edge to it, nowadays leaning towards cruel and harsh, Horatio guaranteed Speed could keep up with him. Tim had the ability to not take things too personally, much like Gregory.

There were days he missed Greg. Though they parted on good terms and were still close friends, there would always be a part of Horatio that loved him. But fate had separated them, Horatio relocating to Miami, and Gregory now in Princeton New Jersey. Despite the fact House hated how Horatio still called him every Sunday to check up on him and see how he was doing; the doctor was always home on that day. The rare times he wasn't, Horatio would just call back and keep calling 'til he got an answer. Over time Horatio had grown an extremely thick skin, and Greg's biting remarks rarely fazed him. If he could survive Gregory House's 'witty' remarks, he could handle pretty much anyone and anything.

Horatio headed down to the lab to see if Speed had any luck dealing with their heiress. While doing interviews at the scene, Speed had discovered that she and her friends were taking photos. He had asked for her phone and she blatantly refused, stating her whole life was her cell and she couldn't bare to part with it. Speed retaliated by getting a warrant for the phone, and had her escorted to the precinct to hand it over personally. She wasn't happy and made dame sure the world knew it.

The Lieutenant paused and leaned up against the wall and watched his CSI deal with the young lady. He was amazed at how calmly Speed was handling the situation. The redhead smirked. He couldn't help himself; it just reminded him so much of a time long ago, or at least it seemed that way.

It was shortly after the shooting in Central Park. He'd been injured slamming one of the suspects into the ground, his leg receiving a deep cut. That was the day he had first met Greg.

~ Flashback ~

Horatio walked into the Emergency Room, looking for Dr. House. Though they had only met briefly, something had sparked between them. He was hoping to ask him out to dinner, or at least a beer.

"Excuse me," he said discreetly, giving the nurse a shy smile. "I'm looking for Dr. Gregory House."

"Why?" she asked suspiciously.

"I would like to speak with him," Horatio answered frowning slightly.

"Did he piss you off?"

"No."

"Did he piss off a family member?"

"No."

"Insult your religion, ethnicity, education, or all of the above?"

"Ahh no."

"Did he stick a needle or a thermometer anywhere it shouldn't have been?"

"Look my name is Detective Caine; I just want to talk to him." Horatio ran a hand through his hair, frustrated by this third degree. How hard was it to talk to a doctor around here?

"You're not here to arrest him are you?" Her eyes narrowed at him.

"No!" He was tempted to slam his head into the wall. "He patched me up after the shooting...I actually wanted to say thanks."

"Ohhh." She paused then turned to another nurse. "Hey, Joan we have someone who actually wants to thank House and not kill him."

"Wow, really...?"

Horatio rolled his eyes, "I'll even leave my gun here if it helps."

"Oh no, then someone would be tempted to shoot him for sure!" Joan shook her head. "He's by the supply closet. Just down the hall...follow the sarcasm..."

Caine walked down the sterile hospital corridor, trying to ignore the stares he was getting. Really, one would think Dr. Gregory House didn't get many visitors; well ones that didn't want to kill, maim, or arrest him. He smiled when he saw the elusive Doctor talking with a candy striper, but as he got closer he could tell something was wrong.

"How hard is it to perform a simple task?" Gregory's tone made it sound like he was speaking to a child. "Or did you miss arithmetic in Kindergarten?"

"I know how to count, jeez!" She rolled her eyes. "It's so boring."

"Welcome to life, it’s normally boring." He tried to hand her the clipboard. "Now I want you to go into said supply closet, and take inventory."

She huffed and folded her arms. "I already did inventory."

Gregory looked at the empty sheet. "Really? So you just, what? Counted everything and didn't write it down?"

"I was supposed to write it down?"

Horatio's eyebrow went up, matching House's expression. "That is way too easy, it's demeaning for me to even go there."

"I don't like you," she pouted.

"Join the club." Gregory grinned proudly. "No really there is one, ask Nurse Joan she'll give you the membership packet." He grabbed her hand and shoved the clipboard into it. "Now get your princess backside into the closet and start counting."

She flipped her hair back. "Do you know who my father is!?"

"The poor sap who wakes up each morning and thinks damn she's just like her mother," he snarked, as he pushed her into the closet.

He turned and paused, seeing Horatio. "You're not here to arrest me are you?"

"Why does everyone seem to think that?"

~*~

Horatio was pulled out of his musings when he heard the heiress ranting; it seemed Speed had lost his sense of calm.

"I don't have to stand for this!" She screamed, "Do you know who my father is...?"

"Yeah, the guy who wakes up each morning and thinks, hell she's just like her mother," Speed snarked back grabbing her phone. "And if you don't knock off the whining and bitching act I'll throw your ass in jail for obstruction just for fun."

She glared at him. Speed glared back.

Horatio couldn't help it. He started laughing, causing both of them to look at him. It was a rare sight to see Lieutenant Caine laughing let alone during work in the middle of a case. He sobered up quickly and walked over to them. "Ma'am I suggest you cooperate with Detective Speedle. This is a homicide case, and penalties for interfering can be extreme."

"I want my phone back as soon as possible." She flipped her hair and stormed off.

"You know it’s tragic but I think the phone is going to have an accident." Speed grumbled, "I mean really, I had no idea how it got under the tire of the Hummer. Really it must have fallen out of the evidence bag."

"Speed..." Horatio gave him a sideways look.

"What?" he asked innocently. "Accidents happen daily."

The redhead bit back a broad smile. "Focus on the evidence and the case."

"Sure thing, H." Speed gave him a quick grin as he walked off. "Then the phone can die a horrible painful and mysterious death."

Horatio watched him leave and he couldn't stop from smiling indulgently. He had been fighting his feelings for the younger man for months now. There was something about him that just called out to the redhead. He wanted him badly. Speed, sex on legs. Or would that be on a bike?

Every time he saw the young man on his death machine, he would get hard. But there were more facets to his feelings than lust. Over time Speed had gotten under Horatio's skin and he'd begun to worry if he was okay, if he was eating right. And God knows the boy was thin. Lately, Horatio had been more worried. Speed had become quiet and withdrawn. It reminded him a lot of Greg after the accident, after he woke up and found he would have to walk with a cane for the rest of his life.

~*~

It didn't take long to get a lead on the case. With the photo evidence from the phone, they were able to track down the suspect and without much work got him to confess. Horatio watched with satisfaction as they lead the young guy away in cuffs. He glanced over to see Speed smiling too. It took his breath away to see that expression on Tim's face, but he was startled by the ringing of his phone.

"Caine."

'Explain to me why I'm getting a weird vibe to call you on a Wednesday?'

"Gregory?" Horatio looked down at his phone.

'Do you know any other snarky assholes?'

"Actually yes." Caine glanced over at Speed. "Dark hair and eyes too."

'Oh really?' House's voice turned more deliberately inquisitive. 'Tell me all the juicy details. I have no sex life, unless I live vicariously through Chase's sex life, but I don't want some weirdly contagious disease.'

"It's nothing." Horatio turned and walked down the hallway hoping he'd find a little privacy out of earshot. "He's one of my CSIs..."

'Which one? Come on Horatio, tell Father House your sins.' Gregory was having way too much at the redhead's expense, and the redhead knew it.

"Father House are you related to Mother Goose?"

'Ohhh he snarks back,' House chuckled. 'Spill H. I know you. You've got that tone. The 'I want to bed him, but more so I want to take care of him' tone.'

"I do?" Horatio leaned against the wall, a bit amused at the conversation taking this turn.

'It's the same one you had when we first started dating,' Gregory said honestly. 'Which says to me you've got it bad for this guy. So what's he look like? Is he hot? I want details...'

"Timothy Speedle, rides a Ducati, scruffy as hell, perfect ass especially in black jeans," Horatio looked around to make sure no one heard.

Gregory moaned. 'Yummy. And you haven't bedded him?'

"It's complicated." Horatio sighed. "He's my CSI...."

'Who the fuck are you and where is the Horatio Caine that pursued me..?'

"Pursued? If I recall you jumped into my bed on the first date!" Horatio laughed.

'Did not...oh yeah I did...' House paused. 'Horatio you know you are probably the only person on this planet I'm serious with. You need someone to challenge you, to love you, someone you can love and take care of.'

H stared at the phone once again. "I could say the same for you. You need to move on, let Stacie go."

'We aren't talking about my pathetic life, we're talking about yours. Besides I got Cameron following me around like a bitch in heat. It's good for the ego,' House retorted. 'Now if you don't call me back on Sunday telling me about the hot sex you had with this Speedle person I will call him and tell him all about your fetishes.'

"You wouldn't." Horatio rolled his eyes heavenward. "Who am I kidding? You would."

'Oh Ducatis are cool.'

"What?" Caine shook his head.

'It’s called the Internet,' House reminded him. 'Might want to try it one day.'

"Oh fuck off." Horatio sighed.

'Only if you're watching.'

Horatio looked up to see Speed walk down the precinct steps. The CSI paused and looked down at his phone, there was a text 'We need to chat grab H's phone - Gregory House.' Speed looked over at Horatio with a slightly confused expression, and then grabbed his phone. Horatio's eyes went wide. "Is this Gregory House..?"

'Mister Speedle I presume. Have fun with the redhead. He likes to be teased and he has sensitive thighs.' The good doctor hung up the phone, chuckling wickedly.

Tim blushed. "So H..." He flipped the phone shut just at same moment when Horatio was deciding to put a hit out on Gregory.

"Yes Speed?"

"Wanna go for a ride..?" he grinned mischievously.

Horatio was about to answer when he heard a high pitched screech of outrage enough to shatter glass. He looked over to see the young heiress glaring in horror at her phone, then he looked back at Speed. "What did you do?"

"The phone is just fine. The sim card, well....." Speed gave him an evil chuckle that sounded so much like House it was uncanny. He leaned forward and whispered softly in Horatio's ear, "I want you too."

~*~

'Someone better be dead or dying,'

"Morning Gregory!" Horatio chuckled into the phone.

'You sound way to chipper at...' there was rummaging going on in New Jersey, '...seven in the morning on a Sunday. Which is a day of rest I might add.'

"Just wanted to check up on you." The redhead leaned up against the deck, slowly sipping coffee and enjoy the sea air. "Besides it’s a beautiful day..."

'You got laid.' House was fully awake now. 'Details.'

Horatio felt strong arms slip around his waist. He glanced back over his shoulder to see Speed smiling at him indulgently. The brunette took the phone from Horatio. "He'll call you back...maybe. If I let him out of bed long enough." He hung up the phone and turned Horatio in his arms kissing him deeply.

~*~

House stared at the phone and sighed. With a sour groan of pain he sat up and grabbed his pills. Horatio was one of the few people in the world who put up with him, along with Wilson of course. One of the few men he respected. He was happy for him, he truly was but he couldn't help but feel even more jaded. The two people he ever loved had found someone else and here he was lonely and in pain. He downed the pill and eased out of bed, grabbing his cane. He never begrudged Horatio leaving for Miami; hell he even understood. But his bitter self couldn't help but wonder... what if? What if he didn't? What if he stayed in New York? He looked into the mirror at his haggard expression. Would Horatio still love him, despite the man he was today? Or would he have driven him off like everyone else?

He knew he might as well go into the office, torment a few nurses, drive the ducklings insane, get some paperwork done and freak Cuddy out. He wondered what the big secret was around the hospital. Some new guy was supposed to be coming in. House shrugged. Like he cared about hospital politics. But it would be fun to make them all think he did, just for today.