Title: All Through the Night
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Ryan Wolfe
Fandom: CSI: Vegas/CSI: Miami
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Ryan Wolfe, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

Greg blinked as he awakened, gazing up at the ceiling as he opened his eyes. He didn't usually wake up like this; Ryan was the one who generally tended to get up first, and he would usually awaken to his boyfriend's gentle kiss, like some kind of sleeping beauty.

But this was a weekend off, and they'd decided to actually sleep at night for once. Greg closed his eyes again, snuggling into Ryan's embrace. He'd fallen asleep in Ryan's arms, and his boyfriend was still holding him, as though he would never let Greg go.

He liked it that way, Greg thought, relaxing in Ryan's arms. He wanted to stay this way all through the night, for Ryan to never release his grip. Those arms around his waist made him feel safe and protected in a way that nothing else in his life ever had.

He'd always needed that kind of security, but he had never let himself be with anyone who could deliver it. He had never really trusted any of the people he'd dated, and even though he'd a few sexual experiences, he had never let anyone cross certain barriers with him.

The rape that had occurred so long ago had really screwed him up, Greg thought ruefully. He'd never even talked to anyone about it -- but with Ryan, the whole story had come out so easily and naturally that he didn't really know why he'd never been able to speak of it before.

Yes, he did, he corrected himself almost immediately. He had never really trusted anyone else to know the truth about what had been done to him. But he'd trusted Ryan from the very beginning, from the first moment he'd looked into those eyes.

Ryan had been the first person in his life who he'd felt that he completely trusted, enough to tell him anything. He'd almost been that way with Nick -- but there had been something that held him back. After all, he and Nick weren't lovers.

Of course, he and Ryan weren't lovers yet, either -- not in the truest sense of the word, Greg thought with a soft sigh. They knew each other's bodies intimately; they had been intimate in different ways, but he still hadn't let Ryan make love to him.

It wasn't that he didn't want Ryan. He wanted the other man desperately, but his body always held back from that kind of intimacy, and his mind couldn't override his physical reactions. He didn't want to deny Ryan his body, but he couldn't cross over that barrier.

He would one day, Greg told himself. He was sure that he would. But how long would he have to wait? And how much longer would Ryan he with him if he kept holding back? He was probably lucky to still have this man in his life, lucky that Ryan hadn't already gotten tired of waiting.

Greg lifted one hand cautiously, not wanting to wake Ryan, but needing to see the gleam of the promise ring on his finger. That ring meant that Ryan wasn't going to get tired of waiting; it meant that the man he loved was always going to be with him.

Ryan had promised him that, and he was a man who always kept his promises. Ryan wasn't going to back out on anything he'd said; he believed in their relationship, and he was in it for the long haul. There was nothing for him to worry about.

He settled down more comfortably next to the other man, hoping that he wasn't disturbing Ryan by being awake and moving around. He didn't seem to be; his boyfriend was breathing deeply, quietly, his body warm and relaxed against Greg's.

He loved feeling so close to Ryan like this,Greg thought with a smile, pulling the covers up further around his boyfriend's bare shoulders. Being able to sleep on a schedule like regular people, deep into the night without having to go to work, was a feeling he intended to savor.

How many nights had he spent like this since he'd been with Ryan? Greg frowned slightly as he thought back over their time together; there weren't many nights when he'd woken up and had been able to simply lie here and listen to his lover's soft breathing.

He liked being able to do this. Even though Ryan wasn't awake, somehow, he felt closer to the man he loved. There was something intimate about lying here and listening to his lover breathing all through the night, knowing that they were here together.

Greg placed a hand on Ryan's chest, wanting to feel his boyfriend's heart beating. His thoughts went back involuntarily to the hours when he was sure he had lost Ryan, so soon after they had found each other. That had been the worst time of his life.

Even being beaten by that gang of worthless trash hadn't been nearly as bad as the thought that he could lose Ryan, that the one person he had ever truly loved would be snatched from his grasp forever before they had even had a chance to begin their story.

A slight shudder went through Greg's body at the memory; he tried to hold it back, but he couldn't. He should have known that the movement would wake Ryan; his boyfriend stirred next to him, opening his eyes and starting to sit up.

"Greg? Are you okay, baby?" His heart melted at the concern in Ryan's voice; this man would always put him first, always think of others before he thought of himself. Ryan was the most loyal, selfless person he had ever known; there was no one else like him.

Greg nodded, rolling over onto his back and looking up at his boyfriend. "Yeah, I'm fine," he whispered, reaching out to cup Ryan's cheek. "I was just .... thinking about how close I came to losing you, and how much I hope nothing that is ever going to happen again."

"I hope not, too," Ryan said softly, propping himself on one elbow and smoothing a hand over Greg's hair. "I'll do my best to keep it from happening -- but we can't know what's ahead of us, Greg .We don't exactly have the safest job in the world."

"I know," Greg admitted, another shiver going through his body. "I just .... that's one reason I'm glad I work with you, Ryan. At least I know that I can have your back if you need me. And that if anything happens to you, it's more than likely going to happen to me, too."

Ryan nodded, obviously having a hard time speaking. Without a word, he reached out to pull Greg into his arms, burying his face in the other man's hair and holding him close. Greg wrapped his arms around Ryan, pressing his body against his boyfriend's, wanting them to be as close as possible.

He wanted to be here with Ryan just like this, all through the rest of the night, each of them never relaxing their grip on the other. He wanted to hold on to Ryan as long as he could, to make sure that his love was here, safe in his arms, in his bed, in his heart.

"I love you," he whispered, unaware that he'd said the words until a few moments after they were spoken. He raised his head, pulling back slightly to look up at Ryan, his throat tightening when he saw him own emotions mirrored in the other man's steady gaze.

"I love you too, Greg," Ryan whispered, his voice soft, but the words sounding strong and firm. "I've loved you from the first second I saw you. And I'll always love you. Always. No matter what might happen, in this life in any other, you'll always have my heart."

He took Greg's hand in his, placing it over his heart, and placing his own against Greg's chest. They lay there for what felt like a very long time to Greg, gazing into each other's eyes, feeling their hearts beating under each other's palms.

This was how he wanted to stay for all time, Greg thought, closing his eyes and letting his body relax. Here with Ryan, feeling the heartbeat of the man he loved all through the night, and knowing that it beat for him, just as his own heart did for Ryan.

When Ryan's arms went around him again, Greg snuggled into his boyfriend's embrace without a word; he didn't want to talk, just to feel. He wanted to revel in Ryan's nearness, his touch, lose himself in the feeling of being held in those strong, protective arms.

He couldn't be happier than he was at this very moment, Greg thought to himself, feeling sated and content. Lying here next to Ryan, knowing that he loved and was loved in return -- was there any better feeling in the world than to have that love in his life?

No, he didn't think that there was. Greg could feel himself drifting, sliding back into slumber; within another few moments, he was asleep in Ryan's arms, his dreams mirroring the happiness and contentment that he felt during his waking hours.

***