Title: Alone
By: it-glitters
Pairing: Greg/Nick
Fandom: CSI: Vegas
Rating: NC-17
Series: 1) Darkness Moves, 2) Perfect Deviant, 3) Public Displays, 4) Shared Toys, 5) Hands Tied, 6) Sheer Madness, 7) Manipulation, 8) Enough, 9) The Gospel According To Tony, 10) Whore, 11) Shut Up
Warnings: violence, rape/non-con, other pairings
Summary: It's a bit of a surprise...

***

Nick work up content – content and happy – two things he had not felt since he and Greg had said goodbye. It was Greg that was pushed up against his back, Greg's arm that was slung carelessly over his chest, Greg's fingers intertwined with his own. Nick knew it was to be a one night stand – it was supposed to be – but Nick could never think of it that way. He would wait for Greg – this would get him through the next few months alone, until they could be together again, if only for a moment.

It was Greg's erection that had woken Nick up – it was poking directly into Nick's left butt cheek – just a little off from where Nick needed it to be.

Nick contemplated a way to wake Greg up – he knew the old tricks – but, they hadn't been intimate in so long, that he knew that Greg would have changed. Nick chose to roll over so that he could be face to face with his lover – even if Greg was only to be his lover for a short while. He could feel Greg react to the movement and hoped that he would be coaxed awake.

"Greg."

"Nicky."

"You're hard."

"Most men are right after they wake up – you're hard too."

"You wanna do something about it."

"No."

Nick was surprised – and feeling a bit unwanted. Greg didn't turn down sex.

"What?" Nick tried not to sound crushed – but he knew that it came through in his voice.

"It's not you... it's the meds... they make my sex drive all crazy. Sometimes I'm raring to go – last night. And sometimes – this morning – I don't think I could get into it even if you rimmed me while stroking me off while we watched porn."

"Oh. But you're hard..."

"Body and mind aren't playing nice on this one."

"So what are you on?"

"Something to even me out. Make my moods a little less... volatile."

"And therapy?"

"Yeah, the doctor could tell right away that the therapy wasn't going to be enough and the meds would do shit without the therapy."

"Do you talk about me?"

"All the time. You are the biggest mistake of my life, Nicky."

Nick was yet again devastated by Greg's simple words. He tried to get out of bed.

"Wait, Nicky, that came out wrong. I mean, I made the biggest mistake with you. I spent so much time with people who were just using me for violence and sex that I didn't see it when you wanted me for me."

"So what was that comment you made last night about not being 'us'? It's the only reason I get up in the morning – the possibility that there could be an us again."

"Because when I get you back... if I get you back... I want it to be real. I want to be healthy for you and I want to love you the way that you love me."

"Can't I help you get there?"

"No. It's something that I have to do alone." Greg was pulling himself across the bed to be closer to Nick. He pulled Nick down, so that he could lay his head on Nick's chest. "I love you, and I want to be good for you. But, you have to let me do it alone."

Nick stroked Greg's hair gently; it was always so soft in the morning. "I know this is selfish of me... But I need to ask it."

"Ask away."

"No more clubs. I mean... call me. We can go together, or we can watch porn. I mean, there is nothing there anymore that you can't get with me."

"There was nothing there that I couldn't get with you a long time ago."

"So you won't go anymore?"

"I don't know."

"Seriously, Greg. If you just want a blowjob and want nothing more than that, you can call me. You want to tie me up... anything. Just, no more with the random people."

"I think that I can do that now. I never told you that I would before, because I knew that would be a lie. And I don't think that I have ever lied to you, so I didn't want to start. But, now – I think that I'm ready to stop."

"I think about you all the time. I think about you in every way – sexual, physical, emotional – all of them. I want to be with you."

"And I want to be with you... I just can't right now."

"But if you need anything... you'll call me?"

"Yes."

"Do you want to shower with me? We don't have to have sex." Greg's erection may have died down, but Nick was still fighting with his own.

"I can jerk you off in the shower... it's the least I can do."

"I don't want it to be a fucking chore." Nick pushed Greg off of his chest and stood up.

"Shit. It always comes out so wrong." Greg was sitting now, unable to look up at Nick. "What I meant was I wanted to get you off. I don't know what you want, but I would love to feel you inside me again... I've missed the way you feel."

Nick was stunned – it was Greg's MO – he always said things that could be taken wrong, but he didn't know that Greg's half hearted offer was actually a plea of love.

"Okay, Greg... Do you have waterproof lube?"

"I think so... I don't think we ever used any of the stuff that you bought. But... I couldn't get rid of any of your stuff."

Nick led Greg to the shower and turned on the water while Greg looked for the lube.

"Found it," he said as he held up the vial.

"Get in; tell me if it's too hot."

Greg tentatively stepped into the shower. "It's perfect," he moaned as he let the warm water caress his body. Nick stepped behind him and let his hands wander over the scars on Greg's back – he had missed the intimacy that a simple shower could bring.

"I want you in me, Nicky. Gently – make love to me, the way you used to – the way you said I always liked it best."

Nick smiled in spite of himself. He felt that he knew Greg better than anyone – that they were connected more than any other two people had ever been. He lubed up two fingers and slid them gentle into Greg's tight channel. He could feel Greg adjusting – Greg was as tight as Nick had ever felt him.

"Greg," Nick moaned as he tried to scissor his fingers against the resistance. "You're so tight, I've missed this."

Greg put his hands against the walls and put his head directly in the spray. He thrust back against Nick, trying to aid in the stretching.

"Nicky!" Greg's wails echoed against the tiles in the bathroom.

Nick knew Greg wasn't stretched to perfection, but he need to impale himself. He liberally lubed up his cock and held Greg's butt cheeks open as best he could as he slid in. Greg screamed his name and Nick kissed the back of his neck to calm him.

"It's good, Greg. I missed you." Nick ran his hand down Greg's stomach and downward to his cock – he found it fully erect. "I thought you said the meds made you..."

"I said they made me not want to – once you get started it's another thing."

Nick bit down lightly on Greg's neck as he began to thrust in and out. He wanted it to be gentle and slow. He wanted to feel every part of Greg – wanted them to move in synchronized time – as one. He didn't know how Greg sensed it, but Greg was there – meeting his every move to perfection. Nick stroked Greg in time with their thrusts – and there, wrapped in the warm embrace of each other and the water – they came together.

***

Next story in series - One Too Many.