Title: Double Blind
Author: EbIv
Author's e-mail: ebonyivory013@aol.com
Disclaimer: I don't own them and I'm not making any profit from this.I'm just speculating on what could be.Jerry Bruckheimer, Alliance Atlantis and various other folks hold the responsibility for them.
Pairing: Warrick/Grissom
Archive: Taking Chances & Michael's page
Rating: FRMAO
Spoilers: None really.
Category: Established Relationship/Emotional Angst
Summary: Gil is clueless.Or is he really?Warrick isn't sure, and the uncertainty is causing a rift in their relationship.
A/N:For KAP, whose eagerness feeds my muse's ego.Yeah, that's what it did.Sure. Hope this was worth the wait!Oh, and MUCHO thanks to kaelleigh for her help on this.I hijacked her along for the ride.Can you hijack someone who is willing?LOL! I should also add that this is NOT kind to Sara, so if you have a problem with that, don't read, please.
Feedback: On list or private, either is fine

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I never thought of myself as being particularly naive, y'know?I mean, I was born and raised in Vegas, the City of Sin.Yeah, so I was a science geek in school, but college was an education onto itself.I had private lessons in the School of Hard Knocks.

But Love?Damn.Every time I think I got that bitch figured out, she turns around and kicks me in the balls.When am I ever gonna learn?Shit.

Gil and I have been lovers for months now.But Sara has been making a play for our boss from the minute she crashed the team.Word has it that there was a one-night fling between them at some conference in San Diego a long time ago.It's possible, I guess.One night was probably enough to cure him of any illusions about her, that's for sure.

Sorry, it's just that Sara's never been my favorite person.It's just not cool to throw yourself at the boss the way she does.

And now that he's my lover, I like it even less.The only reason I tolerate it is because Gil and I work together.If I say anything to her about it, that would only cause more trouble between us, and that's something none of us need.But I gotta admit, there's times I really resent the hell out of the fact that she can touch him in public and I can't.

I've tried to talk to Griss about it.Suggested that he might want to consider talking to Sara, telling her point blank he's not interested.End of story.He nods but I don't really think he hears me.

Shit, I'm not even asking him to tell her he's involved with anyone.So what the fuck is his problem?Maybe he likes the attention.He wouldn't be the first though it doesn't fit his character.

The other possible reason pisses me off even more.I've wondered more than once if Griss isn't using Sara as a cover.Yeah, you see what I'm saying, right?It's fine for him to let me screw him into the mattress because no one would ever suspect he swung that way.Not with Sara sniffing after him like a bitch in heat.

That gets to me because even if I don't particularly like Sara most of the time, she doesn't deserve to be used as a cover.Not without her knowing.She still thinks she has a chance with Griss, for Christ's sake!

God, for all I know, maybe she does.Maybe that's why Gil hasn't given her the brush-off.He's as Bi as I am.Maybe he's playing me like he's playing her?

No.Gil loves me.I know that.Took him a while to say the words, but I don't think it's just because he thought I needed to hear them.I can't see Griss doing that.It's not in his nature to deliberately hurt either of us like that.

This is fucked up.Seriously.

Brown, get your mind on the job already, I have to remind myself.Griss needs this file for court this morning.

As I head for his office, I see he's not alone.Dammit that figures.Think of the bitch and here she is in living color.Drab color, most days.

Wait!Whoa, what the fuck is she doing that close to Gil?

I slow down as I approach Grissom's office and my jaw drops open in astonishment.Sara's tying his tie!Not only that, but Gil looks like he's actually enjoying it.

She looks up, and at the angle we're both standing she can see me through the glass walls.I'm suddenly swamped by the desire to wipe that smirk off her face in the quickest way possible and that scares me a little.I'm not the kind of guy who looks to solve things with violence.

But damn, she has her hands on my man in a way that makes my blood boil.I could do that for him.You see what I'm saying?Tying his tie, that's something a guy can do for another guy and no one would think twice about it.What gives her the fuckin' right to do it?

I take a couple of deep breaths and let 'em out slow while I try to unclench my fingers from the file I'm holding.Dammit, I have to walk into that office and hand this over to him.How in the hell am I gonna do that without losing it?I have to.'Cause I have to give him the benefit of the doubt.

I know there's no way I'm walkin' in there with a smile on my face, but I try to wipe off any sign of hostility.Gotta be a level playing ground.

She's followed my progress down the hall, and now she looks a little nervous as I approach the doorway.Her hands fall away from adjusting Gil's collar as I rap sharply on the doorframe.

Griss turns, and those blue eyes are guileless as ever.Damn him.

I lift the hand with the file in it."You'll need this for court."Tossing it onto a nearby chair, I turn and walk out.

Nick finds me in the locker room nearly fifteen minutes later.I'm wrapping some gauze around my knuckles.Dumb move, Brown.I'm gonna feel that in my shoulder for a while.Lucky I didn't break anything.

"Hey, bro, you okay?"His voice is quiet and full of concern, which nearly undoes me.

Nick's cool.He knows I'm seeing a guy, and that we're both in the closet.He's never pressed for details, just lets me tell him what I can.I appreciate that.I've avoided mentioning the female competition before because it never occurred to me that it could be serious, but after what I just saw?Shit.

As we head out to his Tahoe to go process our latest assignment, we pass by Grissom's office.It's empty and dark.Checking my watch, I see that it's past time for him to have left for court.

Sonofabitch!He was supposed to stop and see me before he left.He promised he would.

Great, and now I sound like a whining kid.When in the hell did that happen?I know the answer though.The moment Gil and I became involved romantically.Much as I try to fight it, I'm a possessive bastard.

Gil and I have even had discussions over it.Sometimes I find it so impossible that he could be happy and content with me that I go overboard and get too possessive of his time.He found it flattering at first but I could tell lately it had been annoying him more and more.

Was that what today was about?Some "no strings attached" attention?God.The thought that I not only drove him away, but straight into Sara's arms makes my stomach churn.Straight.Yeah, lousy pun, I know.

I'm so distracted I almost walk into the bane of my existence.

"Hey, Warrick."Sara smirked as she headed past us for the lab.I realized she must have been coming back from the parking lot.

"Bitch."

I didn't even realize I'd said it aloud until Nick chuckled.

"What's so damned funny?" I couldn't help growling.

He shrugged, still grinning."It's just that you two fight worse than me and my sister, and I didn't think that was possible."

"Fuck you."I used my longer stride to get me out of the building and away from the source of my irritation as soon as possible.With luck I wouldn't have to see Sara again until next shift.That would be fine with me.

*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*

I was surprised when I heard the key turn in my front door.Given what had happened earlier I hadn't expected Gil to show up tonight.

He hung his keys on the little wood key rack by the door, then shrugged out of his suit jacket.Damn, he looked good.Anger flared in me that even as pissed as I was, I couldn't get past the desire.

"Good to know you didn't forget my address yet," I baited, carefully watching for his response.

He looked genuinely surprised."Why would I forget?"

"I dunno, you tell me."I picked a loose thread out of the afghan on the back of the sofa where I was lounging."After all, you're the one who forgot to come see me this morning."

"I'm sorry, Warrick.I was running late and Judge Hartzell hates to be kept waiting."

He sounded so sincere I might have bought it.But he doesn't know how much I saw between him and Sara.I decided not to beat around the bush to find out.

"Yeah, and we both know how much you hate ties."I tried for casual but the look on his face told me I failed.Good.I decided to take the gloves off and get it out into the open."When are you going to let Sara off the hook, Griss?"

"What hook are you referring to?"His voice got cold.

It meant I was treading on thin ice and at this moment I didn't give a damn.I was tired of watching her paw over my lover and I wanted it stopped.Now.

"I saw her this morning, y'know."There, I'd said it.I looked up to see his expression.He was sitting in the Lazyboy recliner, and I couldn't read anything in the guarded face."She looked so pleased to be able to have her hands on you even for a minute."

"This is beneath you, Warrick," he chided."You know I'm not interested in Sara.I choose to be with you."

"I know you're here now," Rick agreed."But that's not the point.The point is that it's unfair to keep leading Sara on.She deserves better than that."

"I'm sorry but I don't understand what the real issue is here, Warrick."Grissom shook his head, obviously still confused."She tied my tie for me.That's all it was."

I admired his ability to keep his cool, especially since I knew I was getting real close to losing mine.I counted to ten and then backwards, trying to figure out how to make him see what had me so uptight.

"Look, if we were a het couple, it wouldn't ~be~ a big deal," I finally said."I could hold your hand in public, and kiss you goodbye on the doorstep.No one would think twice about it.But we don't get that luxury."

"What does any of this have to do with Sara?"

My jaw dropped in astonishment.He could not be serious, could he?Jesus.

"It has everything to do with her!" I yelled.Frustration surged through me and I could no longer stay seated.Pushing to my feet, I paced the living room, still trying to find a way to get through to my obviously dense lover.

"She doesn't have the right"I closed my eyes.What if he had given her the right?God."As far as I'm concerned, Sara has no right to put her hands on you even in public when I, as your lover, can't.And after all the discussions we've had about it, I'm starting to wonder if maybe I'm wrong.Maybe she does have some right."

"That's uncalled for, Warrick.You know me better than that."Gil's expression was stony now.

"I thought I did, yeah.But what the hell else am I supposed to think when I see Sara with her hands on you, in full view of anyone passing by, including me?" I demanded.

"She was tying my tie!" Gil snapped, finally losing his temper."God, Warrick, you'd think it was a capital crime or something.She's always had her eye on me.I've always refused her.It's like a game we play."

"Some game," I growled, still pacing."Especially when she doesn't know that's what's goin' on, Griss."

"So what do you want me to do?Launch us out of the closet and tell her?" he asked.

He just didn't get it, I realized sadly.Rubbing a hand over my face, I said, "No, I'm not suggesting either of us come out.Not like that."

"Then what are you asking for, Warrick?Because I just don't understand."

"I want her to keep her hands to herself.I want her to stop making a play for you every other day."I sounded petulant and I knew it but damn, something had to change.And soon.

"That's just Sara.You know that," Griss argued."To try and get her to change her habits would raise an immediate red flag.I might as well shout over the loudspeaker that I'm involved with someone."

"Fuck, Gil you ~are~ involved with someone, remember?" I yelled.Then my breath left me in a rush."Or maybe you're not.Is that it?All this time I've been thinking this is something special and it's just a convenience to you?"

His face gave nothing away but I saw the quick flash of hurt in his eyes.Damn.Why do I keep forgetting that as much as he hides himself from us, it's twice as easy to hurt him?

"Griss"I tried to backpedal.

"I'm done with this discussion, Warrick.Obviously we do not agree on key issues and talking them out is not helping."Grabbing his jacket and his keys, Gil headed for the door.

My jaw dropped in shock.What the fuck just happened here?

(continued in Recriminations)