Title: Confessions
By: Alison
Pairing: Cath/Sara
Rated: PG
Spoilers: None
Disclaimer: Dear Mr Bruckheimer, please can Cath and Sara come out and play for a while. I promise to return them as I found them.
Word count: If you believe Word, 906

***

Grissom told me where she was. Some bar way off Strip that I had never heard of, but then in Vegas lots of things changed overnight.

I was concerned because Gil was concerned. It had to be serious for him to even notice that Sara had issues; human emotion not being one of his strong points.

"She was really rattled Cath, I tried talking to her but she just clammed up. I wondered if you could have a word with her, see what it is about this case that is making her act weird."

The case was one that they had been working on together - some 'upstanding' community leader who had been beating and raping his wife for years. Sara had really gotten into his face, yelling and screaming, and this was not the first time she had reacted like it. Never so violently though.

I saw her as soon as I walked into the bar. I don't think she had ever really realised how attractive she could be. I had seen the way the guys looked at her - but she was usually too involved in her work to notice, or care.

Sara was sitting in a booth by herself, a glass of something clear with ice melting into it sitting in front of her. I slid in beside her.

"Grissom sent you to sort me out huh?" she said without looking at me.

"He is worried about you that's all. I'm worried about you. What is going on, Sara? This isn't like you."

I look around the bar for the first time. "Sure are a lot of women in here for a Thursday afterno....oh." It dawned on me then. I couldn't believe I hadn't worked it out before.

Finally she drags her eyes away from the glass in her hands and looks me in the eye. "Yep, that's right Cath. I'm gay. Ok? Any other personal details you need about me? Why are you even here anyway? I clocked off hours ago."

She is not drunk but not far off either. People are starting to stare.

"Come on. I'm taking you home. I've got drink at my place and we can talk. No arguing." I get up, grab her bag and coat and wait. She looks at me, looks away, and then, sighing, follows me.

We don't speak all the way to my house. Sara just looks out the window. She must know the neighbourhood because she lives near here. I think maybe she is embarrassed by her confession. She need not be.

Once inside I fix us both a large vodka and sit on the couch. Sara remains by the window, looking out.

"You have nothing to be ashamed of, Sara." I say it as gently as I can. I just want her to open up, to know she can talk to me about whatever is on her mind.

She says nothing, just stands there. I get up and move towards her. She is crying softly. Tears roll down her cheeks. I put my arms around her.

She collapses into racking sobs. It breaks my heart to think that something is causing her this much anguish and that she feels that she can't talk about it. I pull her close and stroke her hair, gently rocking.

Eventually she pulls away from me and wipes her eyes. She still won't look at me.

"You gonna talk to me now?" I ask.

"I should go" she says.

"Sara, do I have to handcuff you to the chair? For Christ's sake tell me why this case is affecting you so badly. Gil is thinking of making you take some leave. So lets just sit down and talk. Please Sara. Stay." I pull her over to the couch and we sit.

It takes her a while but eventually she manages to tell me. I feel sick when I hear that while in college she was attacked and raped by a guy who had asked her out and taken it badly when she refused on the grounds that she had a girlfriend. She had never gone to the police and had been hiding her sexuality ever since.

I take her in my arms once more and just hold her. I want to tell her everything will be ok, but I don't know if that is true. I don't want to complicate things. But I need to show her that she can trust me.

"I have a confession to make." Where do I start? I am not normally this shy about making my feelings known. I look into her face, into those brown eyes, lean forward and kiss her on the lips. "I wanted to do that the first time I saw you."

"You hated me the first time we met." There is a hint of amusement in her voice.

"Ok, I wanted to do that shortly after we met." I take her hand in mine, hoping that she won't pull away.

"Didn't you know how I felt about you? I must be good at hiding my feelings after all these years." Sara says.

"Don't hide them now. Show me. I won't let you get hurt again." I pull her into me and kiss her again, longer this time. She responds as I hoped she would. I want her to know that whatever hurt there is in her past, there will only be good things - with me- in her future.

***