Title: Don't Change
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Ryan Wolfe
Fandom: CSI: Vegas/CSI: Miami
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Ryan Wolfe, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

"Greg, what are you doing?" Ryan asked as he came into the living room to find his boyfriend jumping around and waving his arms as though he was playing drums in the air. There was no music; it took Ryan a moment to realize that Greg was listening to his iPod.

His boyfriend didn't notice him standing there in the doorway for a few minutes; he was apparently so caught up in what he was listening to that he was lost to the world. When Greg did see Ryan in the doorway, his dark eyes widened, a gasp coming from his throat.

He stopped moving immediately, reaching up to take off the headphones, a pink flush starting to creep into his pale skin. "How long have you been standing there?" he demanded, obviously wondering if Ryan had spent a while watching him lose himself in the music.

"Just a couple of minutes," Ryan told him, as much amused by Greg's reaction to being discovered acting out what could be a childhood dream of being a rock star as he was by what he'd witnessed. "Why did you stop? You looked pretty cool doing the air drumming thing."

"I never wanted to be a drummer," Greg confessed, dropping onto the couch and looking up at Ryan, the blush still on his cheeks. "I wanted to be a guitarist. They always seemed to be the ones who drove the crowd wild. And they had all the coolest moves."

"I never wanted to be in a band," Ryan told him, sitting down next to his boyfriend and sliding an arm around his waist. "I wanted to be one of the security guys. They always looked cool to me. And tough. I wanted to be one of the guys who didn't take any crap from anybody."

"So you always wanted to be in the business of protecting people," Greg murmured, resting his head on Ryan's shoulder. "I should've known. I never wanted to be a cop when I was a kid, but I always thought they were cool. I went through all the other childish dreams, though."

"And what were those?" Ryan asked with a laugh, raising a hand to ruffle Greg's hair. "I had all the normal childhood dreams, too. I wanted to be a fireman for a while. And a race car driver. And I think at one point I wanted to be a cowboy, too. All the things kids want to do."

"I wanted to be a scientist," Greg said in a soft voice, sounding embarrassed. "Even when I was a kid. I never had those dreams about being a sports star, or anything like that. And the rock star dream didn't start until I was in high school. But that ended pretty quickly."

"Why is that?" Ryan asked, curious as to what had stopped his boyfriend's musical aspirations. "Even if you didn't make it with singing and being a frontman, I bet you have talent as a drummer. And you're more than gorgeous enough for a band's fans to go nuts over you."

He could swear that Greg's blush intensified before he ducked his head to avoid Ryan's gaze. "I was never that secure about my looks. And believe me, for a long time I didn't look good. I had braces, headgear, a palate extender. The works. I was a complete dweeb."

"I can't imagine you ever being a dork, babe." Ryan laughed ruefully, shaking his head. "I was a dork. I used to get bullied all the time by this one particular kid. I can't even begin to describe all the times he made my life miserable when I was a kid."

"I didn't just have one of those," Greg told him with a sigh. "I had a whole slew of them. I was just lucky that I had friends who'd look out for me. I got along with everybody -- not just the kids in the geek squad. I never really had to worry about bullies that much."

"You were lucky." Ryan laughed again, drawing his lover closer to his side. "I had to start standing up to them by the time I was a junior -- and that wasn't easy sometimes. I got beaten up more times than I care to remember. But it taught me how to look out for myself."

"I can't imagine anyone ever picking on you," Greg told Ryan, shaking his head. "It's not like you're this big tough guy -- but I can't picture anybody not backing down once you stood up to them. You have this kind of commanding presence about you."

Ryan laughed, feeling a blush start to rise to his cheeks now. "I might have that now, but I didn't when I was in high school, believe me," he told his boyfriend. "I was short, so I was a prime target for the sports jocks to pick on. Even though I was kind of a jock myself."

"You were?" Greg looked astonished at Ryan's words. "I can't see you being a jock -- but then, I didn't know you in high school." He tilted his head to one side, surveying his boyfriend. "Let me guess -- you were a baseball player, weren't you?"

Ryan laughed, shaking his head. "No, I was a wrestler for a couple of years. I got out of it pretty quickly, but being on the wrestling team was enough to override the fact that I was a science nerd, too. People accepted me as being one of the cool crowd after that."

"Most people accepted me even though I was a nerd," Greg said, looking reminiscent. "I think it's because I kind of flew under the radar. Nobody really picked on me all that much after my freshman year. I guess they just got tired of me because I didn't act scared of them."

"I'm willing to bet that you're still a lot like you were in high school -- only with a lot more self-confidence," Ryan told him, his voice soft. "Don't ever change, baby. I love you exactly the way you are. All the things that make you Greg are the things that made me fall in love with you."

"Really?" Greg asked in a teasing tone. "I thought you just fell in love with me because of my impeccable good looks and my charming personality." He laughed softly, snuggling into Ryan's embrace. "I don't want you to change, either. I love everything about you just as it is."

"I wonder what the people we went to high school with would say if they saw us now?" Ryan wondered aloud, leaning back against the couch cushions with his arms wrapped around Greg. "They'd probably think it was pretty strange that we're both gay."

"I always tried to act like I was only interested in girls when I was in high school," Greg admitted, blushing again. "I didn't want anybody to know that I liked guy, too. That was stupid. I should've been proud of who I was, instead of trying to be something I wasn't."

"I did the same thing," Ryan told him, sighing. "I think a lot of guys do, even these days. So many people are still in the closet, and I wish they didn't have to be. But at least most of them come out eventually. Well, I hope they do, so they won't be miserable all their lives."

"Nobody should have to try to change who they are to be happy," Greg mused. "If they do, then they're making a mistake because they're not accepting themselves for who they are. Even if you don't like who you are when you're a teenager, that usually changes when you get older."

"And how long did it take you to figure that out?" Ryan asked softly, tightening his arms around Greg. "A lot of people never figure that out. I was lucky -- I never had low self-esteem, even when I was being bullied. I always believed in myself -- and I'm guessing you did, too."

Greg nodded, snuggling into his boyfriend's arms with a contented sigh. "I definitely did. I'm glad you did too, babe. I hope you never change, Ryan. If you did, then you wouldn't be the same man I fell in love with. I know everybody changes and grows, but don't change the basic things."

"I don't plan on it," Ryan chuckled, ruffling Greg's hair again. "And don't you change, either. I love being with a science nerd -- because I'm pretty much one myself, y'know. That's one of the reasons we fit together so well. We're a lot alike, you and me."

"Yeah, we are," Greg sighed, resting his head against Ryan's chest and closing his eyes. "I think we're just enough of a mixture of likenesses and differences to make us perfect for each other. Don't change any of the things that make you who you are, okay?"

"I don't intend to, baby," Ryan murmured, bowing his head to brush a gentle kiss across Greg's hair. "I think we're got everything balanced in the right proportions. And besides, I don't want to change who I am. I've gotten to the point where I kind of like me, too."

"I think I can agree with that," Greg told him with a laugh. Ryan laughed along with him, closing his eyes again as he settled back against the cushions, letting his body relax. Greg's arms tightened around his waist, the two of them locked into a comfortable embrace.

He could spend the rest of his life exactly like this and be perfectly happy, Ryan thought with an inward smile. He hoped that wouldn't change, either; he wanted to feel this comfortable and content with Greg for the rest of their lives, for their peace and happiness with each other to never change.

***