Title: Drabbles # 021, 033, 100
Author: ezra_t
Fandom: CSI: Miami
Pairing: Ryan/Eric
Rating: R
Warning: Angst, Cheating, love and fluffy-ness
Summary: 021. He thought he meant it when he said it, now he wasn't so sure.
033. He thought he was going crazy and hearing voices was just the beginning.
100. The changes were subtle but worth every moment and every kiss. They worth everything including leading up to this.
Disclaimer: I do own the circumstances. I don't own the people.

***

021. Broken

'You said that you loved me. We both know that that's impossible.'

- Resolve by Kat Reitz and Tzigane

He was left there, standing alone, wet and in the rain. The words his lover now ex lover said to him still ringing in his ears.
It wasn't suppose to be this way. He wasn't suppose to fall in love. At least that what he thought this feeling was.
But he knew with some dread that the words his lover had spoken held a grain of truth.
He was Eric Delko after all, he wasn't the type to settle down and not with a man any less.
But his heart seized at the look, and a lump formed in his throat at those broken words.
He thought he had meant it when he had said it, but temptation was far to easy to fall into, and when your drunk and surrounded by hot sweating bodies and your lover is no where in sight, you tend to lose yourself.
And oh god it was so easy for him to lose himself.
It felt like second nature to him, to grab hold of the soft body and pull it close to his.
It felt natural to kiss along her neck and to whisper into her ear.
It felt natural to bring her to his home and into his bed.
Just as it had felt natural to give his long time lover his key.
It felt natural, but you never expected him to use it, let alone that night.
And now, here he stood, a drenched man with a dull ache in his chest and a newly broken man weighing heavily on his soul.


---


033. Voice

There it was again.
That voice in his head.
Whispering to him.
Telling him.
Warning him.
Taunting him.
He didn't know why he heard this specific voice.
It would have made much more sense to have heard Alexx's voice.
After all she was like a mother to him.
Even Calleigh's, since she was so much like the annoying older (if not sometimes younger) sister.
Hell!
Even Horatio's would have made sense since Ryan looked up to the man.
But no.
He had to hear Eric-fucking-Delko's voice in his head.
Always, always when he wanted to go out.
Or go home with someone.
It was like it was stopping him from having fun.
Maybe even stopping him from doing something stupid.
But it all came down to one thing.
Why the hell would he hear Eric's voice?
It's not like the man cared about him any ways.
Right?

---


100. Writer‘s Choice

The change was very subtle.
So subtle that they didn't even realize it themselves until they were neck deep in it, and of course by then it was too late to do anything about it.
Not that they wanted to by that point.
Nobody could really say when the change happened but it didn't stop people from trying to pin point the exact moment.
It was never ending really because one day some one would come up with something and the next some one else would come up with an event that had occurred before that one.

Eric and Ryan didn't really care exactly when the change happened, they just cared that it did.
And that it led them here to this point.
To this moment.
With one man facing the other in clean cut tuxes.

They pretended that they didn't see the openly crying Alexx or the shiny eyed Calleigh.
They even ignored the very rare but none the less bright smile upon Horatio's face in favor for looking into each others smarting eyes.

They couldn't be bothered with the technicalities of the beginning of their relationship because here, in this moment was what was most important.
They pretended to ignore the hooting coming from the direction of their friends from Vegas in favor for their whispered vows.
And when Eric finally slipped the ring onto Ryan's finger and they kissed for the first time as man and husband they both realized that it was here.
That it was now, that something bigger was beginning.

They forgot about the subtle change of their relationship and traded in those first memories for these.
Because it was this change that was most important.

***