Title: Follow Your Dreams
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Danny Nagano
Fandom: CSI: Vegas
Rating: PG-13
Table: Saucy, mission_insane
Prompt: 8, Stroke
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Danny Nagano, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.***
"I love nights like this." Greg sighed softly as he lay back in Danny's arms on the couch, his boyfriend's hand stroking through his hair. "I just want to lie here with you all night and veg out and watch tv. I like being able to really enjoy my nights off."
"There's no way you'd ever switch to day shift, is there?" Danny asked with a smile. "Not that I want you to, I was just wondering if you ever would. It'd just make things easier for us if you were working during the hours that I'm practicing."
Greg shook his head, a slight frown forming between his brows. "No, I wouldn't," he said, his voice very firm and decisive. "I love what I do, and I love the people I work with. We're a team, and we've been one for a long time. Don't ask me to change that, Danny."
"I'm not, baby." Danny punctuated his words with a soft kiss brushed across Greg's forehead. "I understand how how hard it is to find a job you love, and to work with people who mean a lot to you. It says a lot that you're so loyal to your team."
"It means a lot to me that you can understand how I feel," Greg murmured, turning his face to the side and catching Danny's hand in his own. He pressed his lips to the palm before freeing that hand again so Danny could continue to stroke his hair.
He loved being here like this, so close to Greg, when both of them were relaxed and happy, Danny thought, a smile curving his lips. It made the decision he'd finally made earlier today seem all the more right for the two of them .He was glad he'd thrown that letter away.
"I'm gonna go make us some coffee," Greg told him, pressing a kiss to his cheek before getting up. "I'll be right back, baby." He made his way to the kitchen as Danny watched him, that smile still on his lips, his thoughts drifting to what they would be doing later.
He wondered what Greg would think if he went into the kitchen now and wrapped his arms around him from behind, whispering into his ear about all the things he wanted to do to him. Danny didn't doubt that the coffee would be forgotten, and they would end up in bed.
But if Greg wanted to make coffee and relax, cuddling on the couch for a while before they made it into the bedroom, Danny didn't mind that. He liked the closeness, the softness, the sweetness. Cuddling with Greg was one of the greatest joys of his life.
He could hear the coffeepot start gurgling, hear Greg opening the kitchen cabinets and taking down two mugs, opening the refrigerator door to get the milk out. Then there was silence, as though Greg was simply waiting for the coffeepot to perk.
Danny ws sure that he could hear the rustling of paper, but maybe it was just Greg putting away the coffee filters. After a few moments, his boyfriend came back into the living room -- not with two mugs of coffee, but with two sheets of paper in one hand.
"Danny, what is this?" he asked, his voice very low. Greg held out the papers to him; it only took Danny a moment to realize that it was the letter he'd thrown away in the kitchen wastebasket. "You've been asked to take part in a major tournament, and you just threw it away?"
"I ...." Danny knew that it would be hard to explain to Greg why that letter was in the trash; he didn't really understand all of his reasons himself. But he had to explain them; Greg was standing there in front of him, white-faced, looking grim and upset.
"The simple explanation is that I don't want to leave you for that long, right while our relationship is starting out," Danny told him, sighing softly. "I know it sounds silly, because you're not the kind of guy who's going to give up on us because of that. But I just don't want to go."
Greg sat down next to him, putting the papers on the coffee table and taking both of Danny's hands in his. "Danny, that's really sweet, and I love you for it. But this is what you do for a living. You have to compete in that tournament. And you're right. I'm not going to leave you because of it."
"But we won't be able to see each other for weeks," Danny protested, sounding as miserable as he felt. "I'll be able to fly back to Vegas on weekends, maybe one day during the week if there's bad weather, but we'll be separated for a long time."
"Yeah, we will," Greg said softly, his own sigh echoing Danny's. "But we'll manage to make it work out. I know we will. Danny, you can't just give up golfing for a relationship. It wouldn't be right of me to expect you do. You've worked too hard at your craft."
Danny nodded, swallowing hard. This was what he'd wanted to hear Greg say; a part of him had wanted all along, ever since he'd gotten that letter, for Greg to tell him that he should take part in the tournament, that it was okay, that things would work out between them.
But now that it was happening, fear clutched at his heart. He wanted to believe that everything would work out for them -- but what if it didn't? What if their relationship couldn't stand up to the strain of being parted, and this was the end of them as a couple?
He didn't want to live with that strain. If he had to deal with that kind of stress while he was trying to do well in the tournament, on top of everything else, then he wouldn't perform well, and it would have been useless for him to take part in it, anyway.
"If I'm worring about the two of us drifting apart the whole time I'm playing, I won't play a good game and I'll embarrass myself. There won't be any point in my being there," he objected, wanting to let Greg know just why he had decided to stay out of the tournament.
Greg moved his hands to Danny's face, then gently stroked his fingers back through his hair. "Danny, you won't embarrass yourself. You won't play badly, because you'll know there's nothing for you to be worried about. You're not going to lose me."
"But we'll be apart for so long .... I'm scared we won't last through that kind of a separation," Danny finally whispered, letting out the real reason why he was so frightened of leaving Vegas, leaving Greg behind while he followed his dream. Somehow, that dream didn't seem so important any more.
Nothing was as important as his relationship with Greg. If that failed, then no matter how many more golfing tournaments he might win, no matter how brilliantly he might play in the future, nothing in his life would be worth having. Without Greg, it all turned to dust.
"That isn't going to happen. Not with us," Greg said firmly. He looked around, sighing as he got to his feet. "The coffee's got to be ready by now. Let's sit here and drink a cup, and talk. I want you to understand that you leaving for a while isn't going to be the end of us."
Danny watched as Greg went into the kitchen, coming back just a few moments later with two brimming mugs. He took his and sipped; it was just the way he liked it, with cream and sugar. Greg knew so much about him, even how he took his coffee.
They sat there, drinking their coffee and looking at each other for several long moments. Finally, Greg broke the silence as he sat his empty mug down. "Danny, I'm not going to leave you because you want to follow your dream. I'm proud of you for doing that."
"Are you sure that you'll be able to deal with having an absentee boyfriend?" Danny knew that his voice was trembling, but he couldn't stop it. He had to know now, had to be sure that distance wouldn't destroy the fragile relationship that he and Greg were building.
Greg shook his head, a smile on his lips. "Yes, I know I will be," he said softly, leaning against Danny and resting his head on his shoulder. "We might just be beginning, but we're strong, Danny. And I don't mind waiting for you. I know we'll be just as strong when you get back."
Danny nodded, his throat tightening, tears welling up behind his eyes. What had he been so terrified about? There was no way he would lose Greg. His boyfriend wasn't the kind of man to leave him just because of an absence, because things might not be perfect for a while.
He closed his eyes, leaning back against the couch cushions with Greg in his arms, stroking the younger man's hair and feeling Greg's heart beating next to his own. There was nothing to worry about, nothing to be afraid of. He wasn't going to lose Greg.
They would stay together, no matter how many tournaments he left to play in. Somehow, they would make it work for them; they might have to be separated for a while, but the absences would just make the times when they were together all the more precious.
It might not be easy, at least at first. He would miss Greg, and he knew that he would count the hours until he could be at home with his boyfriend again. He might not even play up to par at first because of those worries, but he knew that he would overcome them.
Danny took a deep breath, feeling the worry seep away. Somehow, he and Greg would make this work. He would have his relationship, and he would be able to follow his dreams as well. He would have the best of both worlds -- and he would do his best to enjoy both of them to the fullest.***
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