Title: Hungry Heart
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Mike Keppler
Fandom: CSI: Vegas
Rating: PG-13
Table: Inspired By Songs, mission_insane
Prompt: 1, Hungry Heart
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Mike Keppler, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

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Propping himself up on one elbow, Mike looked down at Greg, smoothing a loving hand through his young lover's hair. He didn't want to wake Greg; he'd had a late night, and even though he'd been more than ready to make love when he'd gotten home, Mike knew that he was tired.

He himself had the day off, and he intended to spend all of that day with Greg, even if all they did was stay in bed and Greg spent a good deal of that time sleeping. He didn't mind lying here and watching Greg sleep; in fact, that seemed a fine way to spend his free time.

He could look at Greg for the rest of his life and be completely happy, he told himself, his fingertips trailing a soft, gentle caress down Greg's cheek. No, that wasn't quite true, he corrected himself swiftly. That would be nice, but it wouldn't satisfy him completely.

He had a hunger for Greg unlike anything that he'd ever felt for anyone else. This young man made him feel alive, completed him in a way that no one else ever could. Even the woman he'd been in love with so long ago hadn't fired his senses in the way that Greg did.

It wasn't only a physical attraction, either, he told himself firmly. It had been that at the very beginning -- but after the first time he'd made love to Greg, hard and fast on the kitchen counter, he'd known that what he felt for this young man went far beyond the realm of the purely physical.

He was in love with Greg Sanders. He'd given Greg his heart and soul, and he didn't want to take them back. Greg soothed his soul, calmed him, made him feel that anything was possible. This was love in its purest form, a love that he knew would last forever.

It wasn't just his body that was hungry for Greg -- though he'd made that plain every time that they were together. His heart was even more hungry for this young man, for Greg's love and affection, not just for the physical satisfaction between their bodies.

Mike sighed as he thought of his past, and all of the pitfalls he'd had to step around or jump over before he and Greg could be together, openly and freely. If only he hadn't been such a fool in the past, then his future would be easier to contemplate -- and easier to go to.

His past kept holding him back, making him put the plans he had for his future with Greg on hold. But he had to let the past go at some point, didn't he? He couldn't hold on to it forever; even though it would color his future, he couldn't let himself be ruled by events that were long over.

He'd have to face the music sometime. He knew that. He would have to atone for the sins he'd committed, and he could only hope that Greg would be able to understand why he'd done what he had in the past, and that he cared enough to wait, however long that might be.

If Greg didn't want to put his own life on hold while Mike made amends for the past, he would have to accept that. He couldn't expect Greg to throw away his own plans for the future to be with someone who had already made far too many mistakes.

But he hoped that Greg would be able to wait for him, that he wanted them to make a future together just as much as Mike did. All he could do was hope that when he finally came clean and opened up to Greg -- and to the world -- about his past, his lover would understand.

If only his past didn't have to come to light! But Mike knew that was impossible; he had to be honest, had to force himself to come clean. He'd spent too long hiding the past; it should have come to the surface long ago, and his own misdeeds exposed to the light of day.

What would have happened then? he asked himself. Would he have spent years in a jail cell, never coming to Vegas and meeting Greg? That would be the greatest loss of his life; whatever happened in the future, he couldn't have done things any differently.

Any differences in the past would have meant that his present life wouldn't be here, with the man he loved. And he wouldn't give up this life for anything in the world; no matter what happened to him in the future, he would always have this time with Greg to treasure.

He'd never felt like this about anyone, and never would again. Greg was the one and only for him, the one person who could take his breath away, who could make his heart beat faster just by a look or a touch -- hell, Greg could do that without even being present.

All he had to do was to think about this man, and his heart and body were hungry for Greg. Just a thought, and all he wanted to do was to sweep Greg into his arms, to move his hands over that delectable body, taste the soft sweetness of those lips, breathe in Greg's scent.

It was crazy to feel like this, crazy to think that this kind of physical attraction could last over all of the years that would be in front of them once all of his past was out in the open and he'd finally put it behind him. Crazy to think that such an emotional and physical high could last.

But somehow, Mike knew that it would. What he shared with Greg went beyond the physical, even beyond the emotional. Greg was a part of him, burrowed so deeply into his heart and soul that he would always be there, no matter what might happen.

Other people might call it obsession, but he called it love. His heart was hungry for Greg, as well as his body. He wanted to feast on this young man, to have Greg in his arms, in his bed, and in his heart for the rest of eternity, to never let him go.

He was sure that Greg felt the same; the look in those beautiful dark eyes whenever they focused on Mike told him all that he needed to know. Greg loved him; Greg wanted to be with him. He'd said so more than once, and Mike believed every word that he said.

Greg wasn't the type of guy who used the word "love" lightly -- and neither was he, Mike told himself. They meant that word when they said it, and he had no doubts about Greg's feelings for him matching his own. This was love, a stronger love than he'd ever thought he could feel.

Even though Greg wasn't the first person he'd ever been in love with, he was the first person who Mike had loved so utterly and completely. His feelings for Greg made him ashamed of what he'd done in the past to avenge a love that he'd thought would be his one and only.

If only he hadn't taken that route, his life wouldn't be so complicated now, he thought with a soft sigh. He would be able to hold out his hungry heart to Greg, to let the other man take that heart into his hands, and have no qualms about the past that could affect their future.

There was no changing the past, he told himself, trying to keep his inner voice firm and resolute. All he could do now was try to atone for the mistakes he'd made, and look forward into the future to the new life -- hopefully without so many mistakes -- that he would make with Greg.

Mike only hoped that he would have the chance to start that life without too many obstacles in the way. He didn't have much more time before he would set a plan in motion that would bring the past to the surface -- and that he hoped would set him free, at least in some ways.

There was one thing that he intended to do before he set that plan into motion -- and he hoped that things would go as he wanted them to. He was going to offer himself to Greg in every way; not only his heart, body and soul, but his name as well.

He had no idea what his boyfriend would say to that; he didn't know how Greg would feel about marriage. They'd never talked about it; that was a subject that Mike hadn't been ready to approach. But now, he was going to take matters into his own hands.

If Greg said no, he would ask his boyfriend to keep his heart open. Maybe he wouldn't want them to get married any time soon, but they had the rest of their lives to be together, to share their hearts and bodies as well as their names. That "no" could one day become a "yes."

For now, he was here with the man he loved, and he had the rest of this day to spend with him, as well as the future that would be spread out before them once the past had been faced down. Mike intended to make the most of the day -- starting at this very moment.

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