Title: In My Dreams
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Ryan Wolfe
Fandom: CSI: Vegas/CSI: Miami
Rating: PG-13
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Ryan Wolfe, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

He was on top of Greg, looking down at the man he loved. Ryan's gaze took in every expression on that gorgeous face, not wanting to miss a thing. The flushed cheeks, the parted lips, the intense look in those dark eyes when they met his own.

Slowly, carefully, he slid inside Greg, his own moan of pleasure matching the other man's. He waited a few moments, then began to slowly thrust his hips, the pleasure taking him over, spiraling him up into the clouds, lifting him to places he'd never been before ....

Ryan didn't know what woke him up; Greg was still fast asleep in his arms, not stirring, and there hadn't been any sudden sound in the apartment. Wolfie hadn't jumped up on the bed, either; the puppy was in his basket by the bedroom door, breathing deeply.

Whatever had woken him up, it was probably a good thing, Ryan thought with a sigh. He shouldn't be having those kinds of sexual dreams about Greg, not when his boyfriend wasn't ready for them to actually make love. It would only make him feel more frustrated.

He wasn't angry at Greg for not being ready for them to get more physical; Ryan knew that he himself was nowhere near ready to let Greg take him. He still had a hard time even thinking about being the bottom in a sexual relationship, much less actually doing it.

Greg had been through a horrible ordeal -- and he'd kept it all bottled up inside for years, never talking to anyone about it. Ryan didn't wonder that his boyfriend was skittish when it came to sex; he would have been surprised if Greg hadn't been that way.

How much longer would he have to rely on his dreams? Ryan wanted to make love to Greg more than he had ever wanted anything in his life, but he wasn't going to rush his boyfriend into anything. If he did, then he would be no better than the bastard who had raped Greg so long ago.

But that didn't stop him from wanting -- and from dreaming. His dreams were becoming more and more realistic as time went on; soon, he would barely know the difference between his dreams and reality in those few seconds between sleeping and waking.

He didn't want those dreams to get any less graphic, really. There was nothing wrong with dreaming about the person he loved; he was sure that Greg had sexual dreams about him, too. But still, he couldn't help feeling a little guilty about them.

Maybe he should talk openly with Greg about his dreams, find out if his boyfriend had them as well. There was no reason for him not to bring up the subject; he could talk to Greg about anything, and if they had any kind of problem, they could work it out.

As if Ryan's thoughts had been so loud that they'd woken him up, Greg stirred in his arms, opening his eyes and looking up at Ryan. "Good morning," he murmured, his voice hoarse with sleep. "I thought you were stirring around. Something the matter?"

Ryan shook his head, brushing a gentle kiss across Greg's forehead as he settled back against the warm pillows with his boyfriend clasped in his arms. "No, not a thing. I just had a dream that I woke up from, and I was thinking about us and wondering something."

"And just what were you wondering?" Greg asked him, snuggling into his arms. "Wait, let me guess. You were wondering when I was going to wake up so you could kiss me, right?" He raised his face to Ryan's, laughing, his dark eyes sparkling with mirth.

Ryan laughed along with his boyfriend, but shook his head in answer to Greg's question. "No, what I was wondering about is a lot more serious than that," he said, holding back a sigh. How was he going to bring up the subject of them being more sexual?

"Ry, what is it?" Greg asked softly, sounding concerned. "If there's anything bothering you, you know we can always talk about it. Whatever it is, if we face it together, it can't be that bad." He started to sit up, his brow furrowing into a frown. "Tell me."

"It's not that big a deal, Greg, really," Ryan protested, not wanting to upset the other man. "I just .... I had a really sexual dream about us, and .... well .... I was wondering if you have those kinds of dreams too -- and if you think about what it'll be like when we make love."

"I think about that all the time," Greg told him, his voice soft and husky. "And I dream about you making love to me. I want that to happen, Ryan. I do. I'm just .... I --" He broke off, shaking his head, sounding frustrated. "I'm just scared. And I know I shouldn't be."

"I don't blame you for being scared after what happened to you, baby," Ryan assured him, tightening his arms around Greg's waist and pulling his boyfriend closer against the warmth of his own body. "I just wish we could make love in the real world, instead of just in my dreams."

"We make love in my dreams every night," Greg told him, sounding wistful. "It's just my stupid mind that won't let me give myself to you like I do in my dreams. It's stupid, I know, but I can't help it, Ryan. I just .... I freeze up. I keep thinking it's going to hurt."

"Does it hurt when my fingers are inside you?" Ryan asked, hoping that Greg would answer his question in the negative. The last thing he wanted to do was to hurt his boyfriend in any way, and if that had been causing Greg any pain, he was going to refrain from doing it.

Greg shook his head, his brow furrowing further. "No .... but you've got to admit, your cock is a lot bigger than your fingers, even three of them. And it's a way different feeling to have a cock inside you than just someone's fingers. It's more .... intimate."

Ryan nodded in agreement; he did indeed know that, and he understood why Greg felt the way he did. He himself cringed from that kind of intimate contact; he couldn't bear the idea of having anything inside him at this point, so how could he blame Greg for not wanting it?

"It's not that I don't want our real life to be as good as our dreams," Greg continued, settling down into Ryan's embrace again and resting his head on his boyfriend's shoulder. "I just .... want to make sure that it's the right time for both of us, Ryan."

"I understand, baby," Ryan told him, hugging Greg close. "And I'm not blaming you. If I'd been through what you have, I wouldn't want to have sex, either. But I hope we'll cross that line one day, Greg. I don't want us to go through our whole lives without ever ...."

"We won't," Greg interrupted him, his voice strong and firm. "I know we'll make love sometime. I .... I want to. The more you touch me, the more I want to let you do anything you want to me. It's just going to take a little more time, Ry. I promise, you'll have me someday."

"Hey, I've already got you," Ryan told him with a soft laugh. "I've got your heart, and your promise to take my name someday, don't I? And as long as you love me, that's the only thing that really matters. I can make love to you in my dreams until you're ready for the real thing."

"I don't think it's going to be too much longer," Greg whispered, his voice sounding a little shaky. "I want you more every day, Ryan .Every time I look at you, I wonder what it would be like to be in bed with you and f-for you to be inside me."

"I can promise you one thing, baby," Ryan told him, brushing Greg's hair back from his face and gazing into those dark eyes. "It won't hurt. Maybe for just a second at first, but I'll make sure that the rest of it is nothing but pleasure. For both of us."

Greg nodded, laying his head on Ryan's chest and relaxing in his boyfriend's embrace. Ryan lay there, stroking the other man's hair, waiting for Greg to say something else. It took him a few moments to realize that Greg had fallen asleep again.

Ryan smiled as he closed his own eyes, wanting to sink back into the realm of dreams. It didn't matter that he might only dream about making love to Greg, and that the actual happening might not come around for quite a while yet. That wasn't the important part of their relationship.

If he could only make love to Greg in his dreams, that was good enough for now. He had Greg's heart; he knew that his dreams would become reality in the future, and it didn't matter how long the had to wait. He knew that it was only a matter of time.

With that thought in his mind, Ryan drifted off to sleep, to dream about making love to Greg. His last coherent waking thought was that the reality would be far better than his dreams -- and that he intended to bring each and every one of those dreams to glorious life.

***