Title: I Want
Author: CarebearStare18
Pairing: Nick/Greg
Rating: G
Summary: Greg tells Nick what he wants.

***


I sit down beside you, a light breeze suddenly picking up and moulding your t shirt to your chest. You hold my eyes for a moment, your gaze intense, chocolate brown melting me from the inside out. I'm shaking and I don't know why. I wasn't before.

I want to touch you, reach over and run my hand down your arm, trail fingers over your soft skin just to see your reaction. But I'm held by the power of your eyes, routed to the spot by my thumping heart as you whisper my name, so softly I almost don't catch it. Maybe I didn't. Maybe it was the wind. Or wishful thinking.

You frown then and look down at your lap, playing with a loose thread on your shirt, and I'm tingling all over. I think perhaps you're going to say something, but you don't. You sigh, and I feel the weight of the world concealed in that one, careful gesture.

"What do you want, Greggo?" I find myself asking, even though I think it might hurt to know the answer. Because what could you possibly want that would give me any hope?

"I want a lot of things, Nick." You say quietly, your voice laced with a sadness I can feel in my heart. You look up at me then, and my heart stops.

"I want Warrick to have never gone into that ally. I want Sara to come back, and Grissom to stop looking so lost. I want to never have seen Catherine cry. I want to never have heard of Natalie Davis, and Demetrius James and Walter Gordan. I want to leave here and never look back..." Your voice shakes and I feel the first prickles of tears behind my eyes as I wonder if you would listen even if I begged.

You take a deep breath then, shaking yourself and returning to the present. You glance around, to the ground, to the dark sky above and finally to me, sitting quietly beside you. Like always.

"...I want to solve this case, and the one after, and the one after that, and become a CSI level 2. I want to go home and eat a stack of pancakes and then sleep for a week. I want a mug of Blue Hawaiian..." You nod then and smile, all brilliance and sparkling eyes.

"...and I want to kiss you."

I blink at you, unable to understand the meaning behind what you just said, my mind a fog of thoughts and feelings so strong I have trouble even remembering how to breathe. I feel sure the world around me has stopped, life grinding to a halt, because surely nothing can carry on the same after a revelation like that.

Then you're leaning towards me and I barely register it, my body's in slow motion, floating in liquid disbelief. And then I snap back and I'm there beside you again. I slide my arms around your waist, pulling you closer as sparks dance between us, the gentle breeze fluttering around us and moulding your body against mine, my own humming with joy.

Pulling back and panting softly, I rest my forehead against yours, basking in the sensation of having you just where I believe you've always belonged.

"For the longest time I've wanted to make you mine." I whisper, my breath ghosting over your soft, red lips as you reach up and run your fingers through my hair.

"Nick, where have you been? I've been yours for eight years."

I close my eyes and pull you into a hug, clinging to you as I let your words sink in and begin to ease those long years of pain.

What you want, is me.

***