Title: The Cookie's Kooky Secret
By: Kuroi Neko-kun
Pairing: gen
Rating: PG
Summary: Cookies are appearing in the crime lab's break room and no one knows who baked them.
Disclaimer: CBS owns them. Go figure why Speed's dead.
Warning: Prone to be sweet and delicious.
A/N: Based on my first attempt to bake M&M cookies. My mom has weird recipes... Oh, and Speed's not dead.

***

There it was again. Stored in a plastic container, lying harmlessly on the counter of the Miami-Dade crime lab break room were cookies. Nobody else noticed that they seemingly appear out of nowhere. Maybe it was the cookie fairy, she thought amusedly. But the blonde CSI knew that wasn't the case. The closest she heard of anything associated with 'cookie' was the Cookie Monster and he doesn't bake. She strolled into the break room and stared at the container with a critical eye.

"That thing won't open itself, Cal," the Cuban chided, reaching for the container. Calleigh caught his hand in time.

"Don't you notice that a new batch of these appear here every morning?" Eric cocked his head to the side.

"Yeah, so?"

"Well, aren't you curious to who placed them here for our convenience?"

"Uh..." Eric gave it thought before shaking his head. Calleigh gave him a look. "Oh, come on, Cal. It's really good and you know that for a fact."

"I'm just saying that it's suspicious," she pointed out," I mean someone who goes all the trouble to bake them and put it here in the wee hours of the morning for us?"

"You've got a point there but..." Before the youngest CSI could continue, Speed entered the break room. "Hey, Speed. You're here early every morning. Do you know who puts cookies in the crime lab?" Speed looked at them both before raising one of his eyebrows in disbelief.

"There are three cases that need to be solved and you guys are worried about cookies?"

"Just answer the question, Speedle," Eric muttered, sensing the ridicule of the other man.

"No, I don't," he said, shrugging. "Maybe H knows. He's always earlier than me." Calleigh sighed. There was no way they were going to trouble H with something this minor.

"Well, get to the bottom of this cookie thing later then," she said, opening the container and helping herself to a cookie. "Chocolate chip and roasted almonds... Nice." Eric took one as well, offering the container to Speed who shook his head.

"I'm not a cookie fan," he said.

"Your loss," Eric responded, eating the cookie in one shot.

"I can't believe this," H mumbled softly, finding the cookie container on the table once again in the break room, already opened with two cookies gone. Calleigh and Eric had inadvertently contaminated his 'crime scene'. He had been wondering about those cookies for weeks now. After making sure no one was around, he sat down and took a cookie.

"Who made you? How did you get here?" he asked the cookie before taking a bite out of it. "Why are you so damn delicious?"

"Talking to it won't reveal its secret." He turned to see his ME grinning him.

"The cookies got you too, huh, Horatio?"

"I've ignored it too long. How did it get here Alexx?" he asked, eating the cookie, looking at the coroner with a perceptive eye.

"Hey, don't look at me, sugar," she said, grabbing a cookie," These treats didn't come from my oven for sure." H smiled before popping the remnants of his cookie into his mouth and dusted his hands.

"I'll find out who made them, Alexx."

"Make sure you do. I want the recipe for this."

The cookies were starting to talk. Okay, not really. But every dayshift staff in the vicinity, including the cleaning lady, had been wondering who made those cookies. People would stake out the break room just to see who goes in with a box of those lovely treats and interrogate the 'suspect'. Thinking that this was completely ridiculous, Speed ignored the crowd. He had just finished a tiring case and wanted to head home.

"So who do you think made them?" He heard the southerner ask Eric as he stepped into the locker room.

"You guys are still on about the cookies?" Speed asked, shaking his head. Eric grinned.

"It's even got Horatio worked up. He was shocked when a batch of those treats found itself in his office yesterday. He never said anything but you could sense his delight."

"He probably wants to marry the girl who made them," Calleigh pointed out.

"Oh that's bigotry," Speed muttered.

"What?" the other two said in unison.

"What makes you think it's a girl or a female for that matter?"

"Well, I don't know," Calleigh said," It's just affixed for the time being, okay?" Speed took that as a peace offering.

"Right," he muttered, opening his locker.

"Anyway, we're going for some beers, you want to join us, Speedle?" Eric offered.

"Nah... I've got to get some groceries."

"You are?" Calleigh said," Can I join you? Mine's running low too." Speed nearly backed up to the lockers behind him before sighing.

"Tell you what, you make me a list and I'll get them for you," he offered. Calleigh raised an eyebrow before shrugging.

"Okay," she said," Deal."

The ability to sneak into locker rooms undetected was a great advantage to Horatio, especially in this situation. He didn't really meant to but it had proved to him once again to be useful. After all, he caught the conversation between his CSIs and found that one of them was suspicious. When did Speed buy groceries anyway? He usually eats out. H was surprised that he even offered to get some for Calleigh. Speed barely did favors unless it was to his advantage. Making his decision, he sneaked out of the locker room.

After sending the said groceries to Calleigh's, Speed eased his motorcycle to a stop as he parked at his apartment complex. He picked up his bag and headed to the elevator when his cell phone rang.

"Speedle," he answered, now balancing his bag with one hand and a knee.

"Speed, there's been a call."

"Now? Isn't that night shift's problem?"

"Technically but this is related to one of our cases."

"Oh... okay, I'll be there," he said," which case?" After a few seconds, Speed realized H had hung up.

"The Great Cookie Caper," H said from behind him. Speed nearly jumped.

"H! You... You followed me?" His supervisor revealed one of his rare cheeky smiles. Speed sighed.

"So," he said.

"So," H repeated, raising an eyebrow. They looked at each other and smiled. It didn't take long to finally release questions from the supervisor's curious mind.

"Those cookies... Why did you leave them out in the break room or in my office? Why didn't you tell anybody about it?" Speed grinned.

"If you were the one who made them, would you tell anyone?" H shook his head, no.

"So it's a hobby?"

"Yeah, my mom left me some recipes that she thought I might need in Miami. Those cookies were my little experiment so that I could send her my own recipes."

"So, the break room and my office... We're lab rats?" Another grin from the younger CSI gave him an answer.

"You were the final test. If you didn't eat them, I'd know that it hasn't reached to a supreme level. You're not qualified to having a sweet tooth, H," the younger cSI explained. H smirked.

"Well, now since I know who the master chef is to the best cookies I ever eaten, you're going to whip me up a batch right now. Ray Jay might want some of these," he said. Speed raised an eyebrow, examining his supervisor.

"Ray Jay only?" H gave him a hard look.

"Ray Jay only."

"Right, whatever. I won't be shocked if Ray Jay gets only a quarter of my batch when it gets there."

"Speed..." The younger CSI laughed. H followed him up the elevator. Once they reached Speed's apartment and in the safety of Speed's kitchen, H turned to his CSI.

"Alexx wants your recipe." Speed smirked.

"She's not getting it."

"Fair enough."

Fin