Previous part of Life Is Too Short.
***
I think I've found my new favourite place. I'm draped across Sara in her bed, my head is on her shoulder and her fingers are running through my hair.
Dinner last night went well. Lindsey was a bit quiet at first but she dragged Sara off to the kitchen for a talk and everything seemed okay after that.
Work was a little strange though, being around Sara but not being able to touch her took a while to get used to.
We all had breakfast together after shift and Sara asked me to come home with her. So here we are. I should be sleeping, I'm seriously tired but I just love being with her like this.
"So what did Linds have to talk to you about last night?" This is the first chance I've had to ask her.
"You, or more specifically me being with you."
Oh lord, I dread to think what she said. I prop my head up on my hand before continuing. "What did she say?"
"She's worried. She said the last few times you've been seeing someone, when you split up you were upset. She said she'd asked you why you'd split up and you'd said it was because they weren't as serious about the relationship as you thought."
"She's worried?"
"Yeah, she said unless I'm serious she doesn't want me to date you, because she doesn't want you to be upset again."
I can't help but chuckle at her attempts at looking out for me. I can't describe how proud it makes me feel to know she'd do that in an attempt to avoid me being upset.
"I assured her that I'm very serious and that I'd never want you to be upset over something that I had done, and that I'd do my best to make sure that never happened. She seemed happy about that." She smiles. Sara was more than a little nervous about how Lindsey would react to us being together. She needn't have worried though, after the initial awkwardness they got along great. Something I'm very grateful for.
"Thank you." I say as I tilt my head up for a quick kiss. "For putting up with that."
"Whatever makes her happy. Which reminds me."
"What?" I say as I change my position so I'm straddling her hips looking down at her.
"I think I agreed to buy her a new game. In fact I'm sure I did, I just have no clue how I managed to agree to do so." She laughs.
I have to laugh at that too. "She's already got you wrapped around her little finger."
"Just like her mother." She says as her hands come to rest on my thighs. "I meant everything I told her you know. I am serious about this, about you." The honesty in her voice makes me smile.
"I know Sara, but thank you for saying it. I want you to know I'm serious too." I assure her.
Her thumbs have started moving back and forth on my thighs and even this simple contact is making me tingle.
I cover her hands with my own, stopping the movement. She grins at my action.
"What?" I ask, although I'm sure I know exactly what she's grinning at.
"Oh nothing, I just love that I affect you like that. I love watching you react to my touches." She says, looking proud of herself.
"Mmm well let's turn the tables shall we." I grin as I slide my hands under her top and gently rake my nails across her stomach. Her breath hitches and I'm sure she knows exactly how I felt moments ago.
I move myself downward so I'm straddling her thighs and lower my head to her stomach, placing tiny kisses over her skin, inching her top upwards as I go. Once I reach her belly button I swipe my tongue around it then dip inside.
Her hand comes up to hold my head in place as she whimpers my name, hmm she likes that. I move my kisses upwards until I'm about to push her top up over her breasts and I pause. I know I'm ready, I've been ready since we first kissed, I'm just not sure she is and I'm not going to do anything she's not comfortable with.
She seems to sense my indecision. "Catherine." She whispers.
I raise my eyes to meet her gaze; the heat I see there makes me want her even more. "Make love to me."
I'm sure my heart actually misses a beat at her words, then proceeds to try and beat right out of my chest. "You're sure?" I ask, although my voice is barely above a whisper.
At her answering nod, I slide my hands up and cup her breasts as I lean up to kiss her, swallowing her moan I proceed to show her exactly what she does to me.
Hours later the alarm drags me from a peaceful sleep. I hit the snooze button and wrap my arms back around Sara. Memories of this morning come flooding back to me and I can't help smile. It was amazing finally being able to touch her, watching her reactions to my touches was the sexiest thing I've ever seen. Her body arching, face flushed, head thrown back and moaning my name, god just thinking about it makes me want her again.
And when she touched me, good god it was amazing, I feel my body reacting now, at the memory alone.
"I'm not moving." Sara's declares and snuggles herself deeper into me, burying her face in my neck and dragging me from my very pleasurable thoughts.
"It's your night off, so you don't have too."
"In that case maybe I will move." She says before kissing my neck and letting her hand start roaming over my body and I'm suddenly reminded of just how naked we both are.
"Oh no." I tell her, covering her hand with mine and pulling away from her kisses. "I said it was your night off, not mine. I have to go; I have to pick Linds up."
"You're no fun." She smiles as she props her head up to look at me.
"I seem to recall you finding me very much fun a few hours ago." I tease.
Watching as her eyes darken I really wish I didn't have to move. "Not fun." She says with a shake of her head.
"No?" I ask raising my eyebrow.
"No, you moaning my name in release was not fun." Oh god, I need to get out of here, her voice sounds so sexy right now. "It was amazing." She says as her hand cups my breast. "Beautiful." Her thumb flicks over my nipple. "Sensual, and sexy as hell." She husks into my ear. My body is on fire already.
"Shower with me?" I practically beg, I need to feel her but if I don't leave this bed now I never will.
Thankfully she relents and moves her hand back to my stomach. "Come on then." She declares as she rolls out of bed and heads towards the bathroom. She's going to be the death of me, I think with a groan as I climb out of bed to follow her.
I arrive at work late tonight, apparently I'm late for a meeting but I'm far too happy to care right now. Ignoring the questioning looks everyone gives me I grab a seat and listen as Gil starts talking.
He's telling everyone about the new software Sara persuaded him to buy after we got back from the conference so I'm not paying much attention, having already been shown its uses.
Twenty minutes into the meeting my phone rings, I offer an apologetic look and bring it to my ear.
"Willows."
"So we're on last name terms now?" I hear Sara's amused voice at the other end of the phone and I can't help but smile. "Funny how you knew me well enough to call me by my first name earlier, in the shower. In fact I vividly remember you moaning it over and over again as I..."
"So what can I do for you?" I cut her off, clearing my suddenly dry throat as I finish talking. I can't believe she's doing this; she has to know I'm not alone.
Her throaty chuckle lets me know she's well aware of what she's doing.
"I told you I'd get you back."
"Now isn't really a good time." I say, hoping she lets me off the hook.
"I know, that's the point." She laughs again. "I just wanted to know if you're coming over here after shift?"
"Yes." I'm trying to keep my answers as short as possible so as not to give anything away.
"Good, let me know when you're on your way and I'll make breakfast. Actually on second thoughts I think I'll have you for breakfast, Mmm, maybe with honey."
Oh god, I feel the blush creeping over my face. "I really think we should save this for another time." I plead. Everyone is looking at me, waiting until I finish before continuing and Sara's thinks it's highly funny.
She laughs again before finally relenting. "Okay baby I'll let you go, but just this once."
"Good." I say earning myself another chuckle.
"See you later sexy."
"I owe you." There's no way in hell I'm letting her get away with this. "Bye." I hang up before she gets chance to reply. Her throaty laugh being the last thing I hear.
Twenty minutes later and Warrick and I are on our way to our scene.
"You seem happy." He states as we reach the car.
"I am." I answer with a huge smile.
"Any particular reason?"
If only he knew. I'd love to see his shocked expression. "Nope, life is just good right now."
"Glad to hear it."
"Now come on, quicker we get this done, the quicker I get home."
He looks at me quizzically, he knows there's more to this than I'm letting on. But right now, I don't want to share.
***
Three months later..."Catherine!"
I've just got to my car to head home when I hear someone shouting me. I look around and see Ecklie heading towards me. Fan-bloody-tastic.
"Conrad, what can I do for you?" I ask, not really caring, my shift ended ten minutes ago and I'm going home.
"How's the case going?" I know he didn't chase me out here to ask that, Nick's still in there and it's his case too, he could have just asked him.
"Great, everything's wrapped up. Nick's just finishing his report up now."
"Excellent, great work." Okay, this is officially strange; I'd be very surprised if he even knew what case I was on if asked, never mind how well I worked on it.
"Thanks." I say, waiting for him to actually get to his point.
"Erm, would you like to grab breakfast with me?"
"Sorry but I can't, I already have plans." I state, feeling seriously awkward.
"Oh, of course you do, this is really short notice. How about tomorrow? Or maybe even dinner?"
Oh my god. Is he serious? Is he asking me out? I think I may have just entered the twilight zone.
"As in a date?" I tentatively ask, I don't want to have misunderstood his meaning; this could be a friendly co-worker thing. Please let him say no.
"Yes, that is, if you would consider it?"
I stand and stare at him in total and utter shock for a good thirty seconds. Well shit, where the hell did this come from?
I fight the urge to retch at his suggestion; I think that might be a little insulting, then again, this is the man who takes great pleasure in making my girlfriend's life hell so maybe I want to insult him.
"Actually Conrad, I'm already seeing someone." I state.
"Oh right, well I'm sorry to have brought it up." He says as he backs away a little.
"No, that's okay, you didn't know." This is the part you usually say you're flattered but I'm not, so I don't lie to him.
"Well, see you later." He says as he turns and walks away. I climb in the car and head home, contemplating what has to be the strangest ten minutes I've had in a very long time.
When I open my front door twenty minutes later I'm greeted by the smell of coffee.
I head to my kitchen to find Lindsey looking half asleep at the table and Sara cooking breakfast. Sara has started staying over here with Lindsey on her nights off and I have to admit I love it, I love coming home to find them both here waiting for me.
"Hey you two." I say as I kiss the top of Lindsey's head. She mumbles something resembling hello and I laugh, she's far too adorable when she's just woken up.
"Hi." Sara says as I lean in for a quick kiss then snag a piece of toast.
"Hey, that's your daughter's." She says as she gives me a playful slap on the arm.
"What can I say?" I shrug. "Feed me and I won't have to rob hers."
She gives Linds her breakfast and heads back. "What do you want?" She asks giving me a wink and I fight the urge my mind has to explore the many answers to that question.
"Toast is fine." I say, grabbing a cup of coffee and going to sit next to Lindsey.
I watch the scene in front of me with a huge smile plastered across my face.
Life is good right now, very good indeed. Sara and I have been together for three months, three fantastic months. Linds loves having her around, they get on great now. There were a few hiccups at the beginning, seemed my daughter wasn't as happy with Sara's reassurance as she seemed but we seem to have worked through that now.
Sara told me she loved me for the first time last week, I think I've been floating since then. I knew I loved her even before we were together but there's no way I was rushing her into anything.
I'm brought from my thoughts by Sara putting a plate of toast in front of me. "Thanks babe."
We talk over breakfast, just laughing and joking until Lindsey heads off to get ready for school.
I grab the plates and head to the sink. I feel Sara's arms wrap around me as soon as I put the plates down and I turn so I'm facing her and pull her into a hug.
"I'll take Lindsey to school while you grab a shower." She tells me as she pulls back.
"Actually I think I'll do the washing up, wait till you get back before I shower."
"Why?" She asks as she raises her eyebrow.
"You know how lonely I get." I joke. "So I thought if you showered with me I wouldn't be lonely."
"Ah I see, I'm glad to hear it has nothing to do with the nakedness." She jokes back.
"Yeah, it has nothing at all to do with that fact that you'll be naked." I laugh.
She smiles before claming my lips with her own.
We break apart just as Lindsey re-enters the kitchen.
"Do you two ever stop?" She asks, giving us a cheeky grin.
"We try not to. If only to annoy and embarrass you." I say as I free myself from Sara and walk over to Lindsey.
"Yeah well, as long as you don't do that outside my school I have no problems."
"I promise nothing." I joke as I give her a hug.
"Come on Sara, let's go." She says as she exits the kitchen; Sara follows her giving me a smile.
Once I'm alone I finish the washing up and grab my coffee then head to the living room to wait for Sara.
I can't help think of how happy I am; I reply breakfast in my mind and marvel at the sheer domesticity of it and how much I loved it. I want to ask Sara to move in, but I don't want her to feel pressured. I ponder how I could bring the subject with her and see how she reacts.
My thoughts are broken twenty minutes later by Sara's return. "Hey." She says as she flops down onto the sofa next to me.
"You will never believe what happened this morning." I tell her. I'd wanted to tell her as soon as I got home. While I doubt Ecklie will have mentioned it to anyone, I want Sara to hear this from me, if she didn't she'd undoubtedly be upset. But figured I'd enjoy breakfast first.
"What?" She asks looking very uninterested. She's never been one for gossip.
"Ecklie asked me out."
"He what!" She says turning to face me.
"That got your attention." I joke.
"He asked you out? Ecklie?" She looks shocked and slightly pissed off. I have to say, jealousy on her is adorable.
"Yeah. It was weird, totally out of the blue, shouted me as I was about to leave and asked me out."
"What did you say?"
I know what she means, but I don't want this conversation to be a serious one, so I can't help but joke. "I said yes, we're going out next week, you'll watch Linds won't you?" I say, laughing as her eyes widen.
"Not funny Catherine."
"Come on Sara, what do you think I said? I told him I was well and truly spoken for." I keep my tone light but she knows I'm serious.
"I can't believe he just asked you out like that, I think I want to hit him"
I swing a leg over hers and straddle her; her hands come to rest on my hips. I love straddling her like this; it's fast become my favourite place to sit.
"As cute as it is baby, the jealousy is very much uncalled for, as I said, I'm well and truly spoken for, and couldn't be happier about it."
"I'm not jealous." She protests.
"Yes you are." I laugh. "And I would be had it been you, because nobody knows about us yet. I have to stand by and watch guys at work attempt to hit on you. I admit I get a little jealous. Not because you react to them in anyway, but because I want them to know you're taken, that you're mine and if they want to hit on you they're going to have to deal with me." I smile, thankfully she returns my smile.
"Does it bother you a lot? That nobody knows about us?" She asks, changing the subject.
"Yeah, it's hard. I'm proud to be with you and I want everyone to know, but I understand there would be consequences."
"So let's do it, let's tell them."
"Really?" I ask seriously. It isn't something we've spoken about often, but I do want to tell our friends.
"Seriously, let's do it. It's making you unhappy and that's will never be something I'm willing to stand by and do nothing about, especially not when I can change it. So let's do it. Whatever happens we'll deal with together."
"You're sure?" This woman never ceases to amaze me. I know she means every single word and to know someone is so concerned with my happiness is beyond fantastic.
"Totally."
"I love you, you know that?" I tell her.
"I know baby, I love you too. Good job really."
"Oh, why is that." I ask raising an eyebrow.
"Otherwise." She says as she steadies herself then stands up, taking me with her. I can't help but squeal a little and cling to her for dear life as she finds her balance. "I probably wouldn't be able to keep you company in the shower." She jokes.
"Oh yeah, definitely a good job then." I reply as she starts walking toward the bathroom and I attach my lips to her neck.
***
I wake later that afternoon and find myself happily using Sara as a human pillow. I know she hadn't had any sleep either; she says she'd rather wait until I get home and sleep when I do. I tell her not to, tell her she should sleep, but I admit I love falling asleep in her arms.
She all but collapsed in exhaustion after I'd finished with her; I just can't keep my hands to myself when she's around. Because I have to act as if we're nothing more than friends at work I want to make up for lost time when we're alone. I can't wait to tell everyone. Just so I won't have to hide how I feel about her any more.
I look over at the clock; we have an hour before we need to get up. I consider letting her sleep but yet again my hormones get the better of me.
"Sara. Wake up baby." I purr into her ear. I get no response.
I place kisses across her cheek as my hand starts trailing gently across her stomach.
She stirs so I repeat my actions, kissing my way to her ear. "Come on sexy, wake up."
I take her ear lobe between by lips and suck gently.
Half asleep she still moans a little. I love how her body responds to my touch.
I move my kisses to her neck and as I bite down gently on her pulse point she slides into wakefulness with a gasp.
Moving my mouth to her chest then down to her breasts, not giving her time to fully register what's going on until I slowly sweep my tongue over a nipple.
"Ugh." Is all she manages as her body involuntarily arches into my mouth.
I kiss my way to her other breast and repeat my actions. "Cat." Comes her breathy hiss as her hand finds the back of my head. I alternate between long slow swipes and teasing flicks of my tongue until she's writhing under me.
I slowly kiss and nip my way down her flat stomach, paying particular attention to her belly button; loving how the muscles twitch under my touch and how she gasps each time I nip her skin.
I've always loved her thighs and I spend long minutes kissing my way down, then back up them. Her grip on my head has tightened and her breathy moans are seriously sexy.
"Please Catherine." She whimpers, and who am I to deny her.
"What do you want baby?" I ask as I settle myself between her parted thighs. I know what she wants, right now she wants soft and gentle but I love hearing her ask. How can I want her so badly after just a few hours?
"I need your mouth on me." She whimpers.
I groan hard at her request and lower my mouth to her heat. Flattening my tongue against her I groan right along with her as her hips buck. Slowly I slide my tongue inside her, thrusting a few times before moving too focus my attention on her bundle of nerves, circling my tongue around it then flicking it. She tastes so good, I can never get enough.
I keep up my actions until I feel her start to shudder, feel her grip in my hair tighten and hear her as she moans my name out in release.
I don't stop until the last shudder leaves her, then I move a little to rest my head on her lower stomach so I can watch her recover.
Her fingers start combing through my hair before she finally opens her eyes; they're still unfocused, full of sleep and lazy satisfaction.
"Morning." I offer, giving her a smile.
"A very good morning." She smiles.
I wait until her breathing returns to normal before kissing my way back up her body, setting myself on top of her, capturing her lips in a slow kiss.
"We should probably get up." I tell her.
"Mmm yeah, we probably should." She replies as her hands slide down my back to my hips. I gasp as she pulls me up a little and slides a leg between mine.
"But we're not going to?" She tightens her hold on me and starts rocking my hips against her. "Good god." I hiss as the sensations start to overtake me.
"We're not leaving this bed until I've heard you scream." She husks as she leans in to claim my lips.
I think we might just be late tonight.
Somehow we manage to get to work on time. We decided that we'd tell the guys about us after shift.
"So you're sure you want to tell them tonight?" I ask just before we leave the locker room.
"Yes, very sure." Sara replies.
"Okay, we'll ask everyone to breakfast, tell them then."
"Okay." She doesn't seem at all concerned about this but I know she is.
"I love you." I tell her as I pull her in for a quick kiss then head for the door.
"Love you too, see you later babe." She replies.
I don't see Sara for the rest of shift. I'm with Warrick and Greg on a case. It looks to be a pretty simple robbery gone wrong but turns out to be a complicated insurance job gone wrong.
I'm distracted anyway because I'm slightly nervous about later. I don't think there will be bad reactions but I'm worried how Gil will take it, especially given his history with Sara.
Still, I find myself laughing a lot at Greg and Warrick's banter so I don't have time to worry too much.
Once we get back to the lab I head to the break room and find Nick not looking to good.
"Hey Nicky, you okay?"
"I will be, rough case, child abuse, thankfully the kid is still alive." He offers.
I sympathize with him; they are without a doubt the most emotionally draining cases.
"You'll be fine once you nail whoever did it." I say, in an attempt to make him feel better.
"We did." He smiles. "Still gets to you, you know? How a parent can treat their child like that?"
"I don't know Nicky."
It occurs to me that Sara was working with him today; cases like this always affect her. I need to go see if she's okay. "Where's Sara."
"Locker room I think. She's not doing too well."
"I'm gonna go check on her." I tell him as I head out the door.
We've spoken about her past so I know why cases like this get to her so much. I just try to make sure I'm there to help her through it.
I check the locker room but she's not there, I check a few labs and the lay out room but no luck there either. So I head to my office; she goes there to wait for me sometimes, knowing nobody will look for her there.
I open the door and see her sitting on the chair at the back of my office. She looks awful; she's been crying and she doesn't acknowledge me at first.
"Sara?" I say as I walk towards her, I kneel in front of her and take her hands in mine.
"Baby talk to me." I plead.
Her eyes find mine and my heart breaks at the pain I see. "Catherine I just...how can they." She asks as the tears start to fall again.
"Shh, I know baby." I say as I wrap my arms around her. She buries her face in my neck as her body is wracked with sobs. She's clinging to me for dear life and all I can do is hold her. I hate feeling so helpless, I wish I could do more to take her pain away but I know I'm doing all I can and I know she'll feel better once she gets it out.
I wonder for a second how I ever thought she was unemotional. She doesn't freely show her emotions in public, she doesn't wear her heart on her sleeve like some but she feels everything and is not afraid to show her emotions to those lucky enough to get close to her. I curse myself for never being there for her before, for not being her friend.
I hold her until the sobbing stops, whispering how much I love her and that it will be okay.
"You okay?" I question as she pulls back, loosening her hold on me a little.
"Better now." She replies.
"Good." I say as I wipe the tears from her cheeks. "Nicky told me you nailed them."
"Yeah." She says, giving me a faint smile. "Kid will be living with her Aunt now."
"So you did well. You gave a child a chance at a good life." I say, trying to soothe her.
"I know, just gets to me, how they could do it in the first place, Jesus I can't even bring myself to shout at Lindsey."
I stop for a second and think of the possibilities of that statement. Is she starting to see us as a family now? I push the thoughts to the back of my mind, now isn't the time for that discussion.
"I know. But you and Nick did well today, you should be proud."
I tell her as I wrap my arms around her once more.
A few minutes later she pulls back, she looks a hell of a lot better now than she did fifteen minutes ago.
"Thanks." She says.
"Don't ever thank me for trying to make you feel better. I hate seeing you hurting." I reply then lean in for a quick kiss.
She deepens our kiss and I let her, knowing she needs this right now; she needs to feel something else. Needs the comfort our connection brings.
"WHAT THE HELL IS GOING ON HERE?" I hear over my shoulder.
I tear my mouth from Sara's and turn to see Ecklie standing in the doorway. Shit. He looks seriously pissed and I'm lost for words right now. I can't believe I didn't lock the door.
"Looks like kissing." Sara offers her voice full of disdain. Okay, not helping baby. I know she'll have just pissed him off more, but I also know that right now she doesn't care.
"Both of you, my office, NOW!" He practically yells before storming off.
Well shit, this is not going to be fun.
***
Okay Catherine think. How am I going to handle this? Yep, this would be me panicking and pacing up and down my office, since when do I pace?
"Hey, calm down." Sara says as she grabs my arm. "This is not a problem, we we're going to tell everyone today anyway."
"Yeah but I wasn't including him, by everyone I meant everyone but him."
She giggles at my explanation; I can't believe she's finding this funny.
"This isn't funny Sara." I say seriously.
"Look." She says as she cups my face in her hands. "So this wasn't part of the plan and yes it's taken us by surprise, but it was going to happen. So we'll deal with it together, just like we said we would."
I take a deep breath and let her calmness wash over me, she's right, this wasn't planned, but very little in my life has been.
"Besides, what's the worst that can happen? He shouts a little, we listen, and he tells us to keep it out of work. We agree."
I can see she's worried, she knows as much as I do that he has it in for her, but she's not letting it show and right now I'm grateful for her strength, even if it is just a front.
"Right. Let's go then." I say as I grab her hand and head to Ecklie's office.
We don't say a word as we head down the corridor and once outside his office I turn to Sara. She nods and knocks on his door.
"Come in."
I don't know why I feel so nervous; I'm usually the confident one.
We wordlessly enter his office and sit down; his eyes seem transfixed on our joined hands. I contemplate letting Sara's hand go for a second but decide I need some sort of connection with her right now.
"So care to explain what the hell is going on with you two?" He asks as his eyes dart between Sara and I. He doesn't give us the chance to answer. "Care to tell me why I just found you two making out like teenagers at work?"
Teenagers?
"We're together." Sara tells him. Just like that. She states the fact as if she'd told a million people, and I heard the pride in her voice as she spoke. I admit that even in these circumstances I want to smile at her tone.
I see anger cross his face as he looks at her. I'm starting to get the feeling this is not going to be as easy as Sara thought. I'm confused though, I fail to see why he would be angry.
"This is completely unacceptable." He states.
"Why?" I ask, finally finding my voice.
"For one, you're her superior..."
"No, I'm not a supervisor any more and even when I was, Sara was not on my team." I cut him off, there's no way he's going to pull that one.
"But you are her senior, if you're on a case together, you're lead, it is possible that your personal relationship could affect professional decisions."
Okay so he's starting to piss me off now.
"It hasn't for the past three months." I state.
"Three months!" He practically bellows.
"Yes, not that it's any of your business." Sara states. Having just got of a case that left her so emotional she really isn't in the mood for this. I need to make sure this is over with quickly.
Anger crosses his face again and I feel my stomach start to churn. She's managed to piss him off even more. He's blowing this totally out of proportion and I have no idea why.
"You both know work place relationships, while not strictly prohibited are not looked upon kindly and quite frankly I'm surprised at you Catherine."
Surprised at me? What the hell. He is so not getting away with that. "But work based relationships were fine when you asked me out? And you are sure as hell in a position to influence my career." I accuse.
I know I shouldn't be pissing him off even more but this is bullshit and he knows it.
"Okay. I tried to come to some compromise but it seems neither of you are willing to listen."
"Listen to what? What compromise? You're being an ass Ecklie and you know it. What is your issue here? The fact that we're both women or the fact that she turned you down in favour of me? Or is it just your issues with me?" Sara explodes at him.
Okay, so this situation is officially out of control. I need to do something.
"Sara, calm down baby please." I plead.
"No. I want to know why he's being an ass hole."
"That's it. You've just crossed the line Sidle. You may be able to speak to Grissom like that but I will not tolerate it. Consider yourself suspended without pay until further notice."
"Conrad, can't we just talk about this." I say quickly, trying in vain to get a grip on this situation.
"No, there's nothing to discuss. And as for your relationship, I won't tolerate it in my lab."
Tolerate? He won't tolerate it? What the fuck?
"You won't tolerate it?" I question, anger very clear in my voice. Why is he such a bastard? "Nobody is asking you to tolerate it; it's not going to change so you best find a way to deal with it." I say. Screw it all, there's no way I'm letting him get away with saying that.
"Work based relationships." He clarifies. "You work the same shift, whether you like it or not Catherine your opinion influences Grissom's decisions. Directly or indirectly you could have an impact on her career. That is what I won't tolerate."
"Bullshit Conrad." I fume. What the fuck is this guy's problem?
"This isn't open for discussion." He states.
"So put me on days. Problem solved." Sara states.
"There's no positions open on day shift, but you are both not working the same shift. Now if you'll excuse me I have a meeting. You'll have my decision on this within the next few days."
And with that he storms out of his office leaving Sara and I sitting in stunned silence.
Well, that went well.
A few minutes later and neither of us have moved yet, we've just sat here trying to comprehend the huge mess we have just managed to get ourselves into.
"Catherine? Sara?" I hear from the office doorway, turning I see Gil looking concerned.
"Is everything okay?" He asks.
I glance at Sara; she looks as shocked as I feel.
"Gil, can you get the guys together and meet us in the break room in ten minutes? We need to talk."
"This has something to do with Ecklie just storming out doesn't it?"
"Unfortunately yes." I tell him.
"Okay, I'll see you both in a few minutes." He says with a nod, then turns and heads towards the lab.
I get up and close the door.
"Well shit." Sara says as she stands and turns to face me.
"That pretty much covers it." I reply.
"You're going to tell Grissom and everyone now?"
"Not if you don't want to." I say. I hadn't thought that she'd have changed her mind.
"No, I want to tell them, if we didn't Ecklie would, when they ask why I'm suspended. I just wish the circumstances were better. Before it was because we wanted to, because we felt it was time, now it's because someone else will if we don't."
"I know." I say as I walk towards her, wrapping my arms around her as soon as I'm close enough. It amazes me that no matter what situation I'm in, everything seems better when she's holding me. "We'll figure this out." I assure her. Although right now, I have no idea how.
"I'd kiss you but that's what got us into trouble in the first place." She smiles.
"Yeah, but we're already in trouble now anyway." I reply before giving her a quick kiss.
"So let's go tell the guys." She says, grabbing my hand.
"I have a feeling this will be a whole lot easier." I say as I follow her out of the room.
***
When we reach the break room everyone is waiting for us. Gil still looks concerned, a look that changes to confusion as he spots me holding Sara's hand.
The rest of the guys notice as well but thankfully they choose to wait for an explanation instead of asking questions.
I have no idea how to start this conversation. As much as I love these people and as sure as I am that they won't react like Conrad, I can't help but be slightly defensive, especially after the conversation Sara and I have just been through.
"So you wanted to talk to us?" Gil asks.
"Erm, yeah. It's just a little harder than we thought." Sara offers.
"Well why not start with telling us what Conrad is so upset about." He suggests.
"He suspended me indefinitely without pay." She states.
"Why would he do that?" Gil asks. I'm sure he's hoping he'll be able to talk him around. I get the feeling he won't be as successful this time around.
"I may have called him an ass hole." She says as she looks anywhere but at Grissom. "Actually I may also have implied that he was a homophobic, jealous, ass hole."
I know I shouldn't but the way she's explaining it makes me giggle. She sounds like Lindsey trying to explain her way out of something. Thankfully my laughter seems to relieve some of the tension in the room.
"What did he do?" Greg asks.
Sara casts a glance at me, making sure I haven't changed my mind. I simply nod for her to continue.
"He walked in on me and Catherine in her office and basically flipped."
"Walked in on you and Catherine what?" Nick asks. I figure he knows the answer, he just wants confirmation.
"Kissing. He walked in on us kissing." Sara states as her grip on my hand tightens.
"Wow. You two are together?" Greg asks. "Damn, no wonder I never had a chance, not when Catherine was the competition." He says with a wink.
"You got that right Greggo, so you best stop flirting with my girl from now on." I tease.
I feel relief wash over me as Warrick and Nick join in with Greg's laughter at my warning.
"Seriously, congrats." He says when he stops laughing. "I'm happy for you both."
"Thanks." Sara says, blushing because of all the attention we're getting right now.
"I'm shocked." Nick adds. "But it's about time you dealt with all that tension between you both and this way is far better for your health." He smiles.
"Yeah, way to go. Good to see you both happy." Warrick says.
Grissom is yet to speak; he waits until everyone else passes their comments then offers a simple 'congratulations'.
Sara's grip on my hand loosens at his words; she was worried about how they would react just as much as I was so to have everyone so happily accept this is a massive relief to us both.
"So why did Ecklie freak?" Warrick asks.
"He said he refuses to have work based relationships in his lab. Especially since I could possibly affect Sara's career." I tell him.
"How so?" Gil questions. "You're not her supervisor."
"I know, but apparently it's because we're friends and whether I like it or not, my opinions can influence your decisions."
"That's bullshit." Nick says.
"That's what I told him, but he said it's not open for discussion."
"So what does he intended to do? Put one of you on day shift?" Gil asks.
"No, he said there are no positions open on days." Sara replies. "But he won't tolerate this in his lab. To be honest I think he's going to transfer me." She says.
"Screw that. He can't break the team up again." Greg says.
"I'm afraid he can Greg." Gil tells him.
"But you're not going to let him are you Gris?" Warrick asks.
"I'm going to do my best to convince him otherwise. Now I'm sorry but I really have to go. Jim is waiting for me."
"I'll come with you Gil. I want to talk to Jim."
He nods and I stand to follow him out of the room, leaving Sara to deal with the million and one questions the guys will no doubt have.
Just as I reach the door a thought crosses my mind. Everyone knows now, I don't have to act like Sara and I are just friends. So I turn and walk back to her. She's going to kill me for this later, but it'll be worth it.
Once I reach her side she looks up at me but I don't give her chance to ask questions I just lean down and capture her lips with mine, I keep it quick, we do have an audience after all. "See you later baby." I say as I pull back.
She's blushing again and I can't help smile, especially as I notice the guy's expressions when I turn to leave. Oh yeah, she's going to kill me later.
I make my way to the car park and spot Gil and Jim waiting for me. Had I known Jim was here I'd have asked Grissom to have him meet us too. As he notices me, Gil nods and heads off to the car.
"Can I talk to you for a minute Jim?" I ask.
"Of course." He replies.
"I wanted you to hear this from me, not the rumour mill."
He doesn't reply, just nods for me to continue.
"Sara and I are together." I tell him, unable to hide my smile.
"Really? Excellent, so she finally came to her senses hey?" He smiles.
"Oh yeah, she didn't stand a chance." I joke.
"Didn't think for a second that she did. Does everyone know?"
"As of tonight, yes. Although Ecklie is a little less than joyful." I tell him.
"He's an ass hole." He shrugs. "He's probably just jealous."
"Funny, that's what Sara told him."
He laughs before replying. "You know, I always liked her." He says before laughing again.
"I'm happy for you both." He tells me when he's stopped laughing.
"Thanks Jim. You best go; Gil seems to be in a hurry."
"Yeah. I see you tomorrow." He says before heading of to the car.
I head back to the break room to rescue Sara and bump into Warrick as he walks out of the locker room.
"You okay with this?" I ask him.
"Of course I am. You know me better than that." He replies.
"Yeah I do. I was just making sure."
"Cath, It's always been her hasn't it? That's why we never happened."
"Yeah." I tell him honestly.
I watch as he smiles. "Good. I'm glad you're happy."
"Seems we both are." I reply as I give him a hug.
"Yeah." He smiles. "Now go rescue your girl before she hurts Greg."
I laugh as I walk away from him. I can't believe how easy it was telling our friends, not that I thought there would be bad reactions, not that I thought anything really, I had no idea what to expect.
As I walk back to the break room the uneasy feeling settles back in the pit of my stomach. I know this isn't over yet, not with Ecklie seemingly on the war path.
I just hope that we can deal with whatever he decides to throw at us.
***
Shift finished a few hours ago, I can't remember the last time I was that grateful to leave work. I knew Sara and I needed to talk about what had happened and was could possibly happen in the near future.
Sara has been quiet since we got to her apartment, she gets like that when she's thinking things through. It's frustrating sometimes, but I know when she's figured things out in her own mind she'll talk to me, so I just have to be patient. I asked her as we climbed into bed if she wanted to talk about it; she just shook her head and asked if we could sleep first.
I know she's still awake and we've been lying here for over an hour. I'm sure she thinks I'm asleep but I can't sleep knowing she's so restless.
"Baby, talk to me." I say without opening my eyes or moving my head from her shoulder.
"I thought you'd gone to sleep."
"Not likely with your fidgeting, woman." I tease. "Now talk, you're not going to rest otherwise." I tell her as I lift my head to make eye contact.
"I don't know what to do."
"About?" There are a few things she could mean by that right now.
"This thing at work, I have no idea what to do, how to fix it. I hate feeling like this. What if he transfers me?"
I wish I could somehow ease her fears but I'm at just as much of a loss here as she is. She's never really been in this situation before though, she's always got a plan, always has a sense of where she's going. So having that certainty taken away from her, not having any say in such an important decision must be scary as hell.
"There's no point worrying about it until we know for sure what he is going to do. Then when we do, we'll deal with it together."
"But what if..."
"Shh baby. Sleep now, worry later." I cut her off as I roll onto my back and gesture for her to follow me.
Seconds later she's snuggled into my side with her head on my shoulder. I run my hand through her hair, something I know relaxes her.
"Love you." She says as I feel her start to relax.
"Love you too." I reply.
I keep stroking my fingers through her hair until her breathing evens out and I'm sure she's asleep.
I can't help worry myself about this. What the hell will we do if he decides to transfer her? I don't even want to think about her not being around. I just hope Gil can talk some sense into Ecklie.
"Hey Cat, how you doing?"
"Oh, hey Jim didn't see you there. I'm okay thanks."
I'd been sitting in the break room so lost in thought that I didn't hear him come in.
"You don't look okay." He says as he sits down. "How's Sara holding up?"
I can't help the frustrated sign I release at his question.
"Honestly? I'm not sure. She's claming up, not letting me in."
"She heard from Ecklie yet?"
"I don't think so; I can't believe he's left her hanging like this for two weeks. But then she's so withdrawn these days I'm not sure if she'd tell me if she had."
"Surely it's not that bad."
"I don't know Jim. She's pulling away from me and I don't really know how to make her see that we'll get through this. She doesn't have a history of people standing by her."
"All you can do is be there, wait till she's ready to talk."
"I know, and I will. I just wish she'd stop thinking she has to deal with it all herself, I know she's only doing it because she doesn't want to worry me; unfortunately it's doing just that. I just hope she opens up soon."
"Or we could kill Ecklie? I'll shoot him; you help me cover it up."
I smile at his attempt to cheer my up. "Yeah, I like the sound of that."
"Like the sound of what?" Grissom asks as he enters the room.
"Killing Conrad." I state.
"Appealing as that thought is, I think it would only increase our problems."
"True, but it's a nice thought." I say.
"I take it he still hasn't made his decision yet?"
"No, he hasn't."
"He refuses to listen to me, it looks like we'll just have to wait, and then try to deal with whatever happens."
I know Gil is feeling guilty about this, he thinks Ecklie is only doing this to get back at him for god only knows what.
"Oh I bet he loves this." Jim adds.
"Oh yeah. I just bet he does."
What I wouldn't give to go and have this out with him but there's no way I'm going to do anything that could make this worse.
"Jim, I believe we have a case we should be working on."
"Yeah. You hang in there Catherine; it'll be all right, even if I do have to kill Ecklie." He winks at me as he follows Gil out of the room.
"See you both later." I call after them.
My thoughts return to Sara as soon as I'm left on my own. I hate Ecklie right now. I can't believe he's messing her about like this.
I head to my office to attempt to get some paperwork done. I'm half way there when my phone rings. I smile when I see it's Sara.
"Hey beautiful." I say as I answer the phone.
"Hey babe, you okay?"
"I'm okay. What's up?"
"Can you come home? I just spoke to Ecklie."
"I'll be there in ten."
"Thanks. See you soon. Love you."
"Love you too." I say before hanging up.
Okay Catherine calm down, full blown worry will not do anyone any good right now. I take a few calming breaths and call Gil to tell him I'm leaving. I promise to call him when I know what's going on and head to the parking lot.
I make it to Sara's apartment in record time and a million butterflies settle in my stomach when I let myself in. I can't remember the last time I was this nervous.
I find Sara in the living room curled up on the sofa.
"What did he say?" I ask as I sit down next to her.
"I can either move to Miami or back to San Francisco." She says as she turns to face me, I see she's been crying and I can't help wishing I had taken Jim up on his offer.
"Bastard. He can not to this." God I want to scream. "We'll get through this Sara." I say in an attempt to reassure her.
"How Catherine?" She asks as she stands up and starts pacing. "He's basically made it so I have to choose either my job or you and Lindsey." I attempt to say something but she cuts me off before I get the chance.
"I love you with everything that I am and I can't even comprehend my life without you both in it now. But I've worked my whole life for this job, it's all I know how to be, it's all I ever wanted to be and I have no idea if I'm strong enough to make this decision." The tears running down her cheeks are breaking my heart. I wish I could just make it all disappear. Do something to make her feel better.
I grab her hand and make her sit down.
"There are other options, we could come with you."
She shakes her before replying. "No, your whole family is here and I will not let you give that up for me. Plus Lindsey would have to change schools and I'm not prepared to be responsible for that kind of upheaval, she needs stability and her family."
I can't argue with her there but I'll be damned if I'll just sit back and do nothing.
"Then we'll just be in a long distance relationship, we will be okay Sara." I love her far too much to let us not be.
"I'm scared."
"Me too baby." I say as I wrap my arms around her.
She buries her face in my neck and clings to me for dear life.
Truth is I have no idea how this is going to turn out. I won't ask her to decide between me and her job, I know how much her work means to her and I know why it means so much to her. I make a promise to myself right there and then to support her in whatever decision she makes.
"Come on, let's get some rest." I tell her.
"Yeah okay." She says taking my hand and heading to the bedroom.
"I promised Gil I'd call him, tell him what Ecklie said. That okay?"
"Yeah, I'll get changed while you call."
Twenty minutes later and I'm in bed, wrapped around Sara.
"What did Grissom say?"
"You know what, I have no idea, he went all Grissom-ish for a minute then said he had something to work on."
I hear Sara chuckle at my description at smile. I love her laugh so much and it's not something I've heard the past few weeks.
"We'll talk more tomorrow." She says. Thank god for that.
"Okay baby." I reply, lifting my head to get a kiss before snuggling back in.
"Whatever happens Sara, whatever you decide to do, I love you."
"Love you too."
I love lying here like this, there's something about being in her arms that makes me feel so safe, no matter what is happening. I can't help feel a little hopeful as I let sleep overtake me.
***
I decided to take a few days off work after Sara spoke to Ecklie. I just wanted to be there to support her as much as possible.
We spoke a lot, going over our options. Sara is adamant that we shouldn't move with her. I do see her point. My daughter has to come first and she does need stability, taking her away from her family and friends just as she's started setting down is not a good idea. But there is a huge part of me that just doesn't care, selfish I know but the thought of not being with Sara is unacceptable. So it seems we'll have to go with the long distance relationship option, her giving up her job is not something I'm about to let her do, she'd regret it after five minutes.
Truth is though, I've never believed long distance relationships work, and how can you be in a relationship with someone you hardly ever see?
"You have to go to work tonight?" I hear Sara ask as she enters the living room.
"Unfortunately yes." I tell her as she sits down next to me and hands me a cup of coffee.
"So what did Grissom say when he phoned?"
"That he was going to try once more to talk to Ecklie tonight."
"I'm grateful but he's wasting his time." Sara replies with a shake of her head.
"Maybe, but apparently he has a plan, refused to tell me what though."
"Should we worry?" She laughs.
"Probably. I'm hoping it includes something venomous." I joke.
"We can only hope."
A few hours later and I'm leaving for work.
"See you later baby." I say leaning over to steal a quick kiss.
"Was that meant to be a kiss?" Sara teases as she follows me to the door. I can't even begin to describe how happy I am to see her playful side, especially seeing how low she's been feeling lately. "Because if so, it was severely lacking, especially since I know you can do so much better." She smiles as she gently pushes me against the door.
"You think you can handle it?" I joke back.
"Let's find out." She says before capturing my lips with her own.
God I love the tiny little whimpers she always makes when we kiss. I tangle my hand in her hair and deepen our kiss. I could do this forever.
"Now that, was a kiss." She husks when she pulls back.
"Mmm, I'm not so sure, we could try again." I say leaning back in.
"Not unless you don't mind being very, very late for work." She states.
"You are evil you know that, how am I meant to concentrate on work now? When I know there are far more pleasurable things I could be doing."
She chuckles before leaning in for another quick kiss. "Go, before I decide I don't want to let you." She says as she moves back from me.
"Okay, but you are so mine after I get home, so you best get some rest. See you later."
Sara grabs my hand just as I turn to leave.
"I love you." She tells me. My heart always does a happy dance whenever she tells me she loves me and I can't help smile. "Whatever happens I want you to know that."
"I love you too." I tell her as I turn and leave.
"Any luck with Ecklie?" I ask Gil as soon as I enter his office.
"Unfortunately no, but I haven't given up."
"Ah, the plan. Are you going to tell me about that yet?"
"All will become clear by the end of the night." He says.
"I hate the way you do that." I joke.
"It's best that you don't know. That way there can be no accusation that you had anything to do with it."
"Okay. Whatever it is I hope it works."
"So do I Catherine. Now assignment, simple B and E, so barring any unforeseen circumstances you should be back by the end of shift."
"When all will be revealed?"
"I'll see you later." He says giving me his best Grissom like smile and leaving his office.
Shift passes unbelievably slowly tonight, probably because I look at my watch every five minutes, hoping it's time to head back to the lab.
Finally what seems like days later I get back. I put my evidence away, head to trace to get some samples done then start scouring the lab in search of Gil. Patience has never been one of my strong points.
I don't have to look far as I near the break room I hear Ecklie sounding very pissed off.
I walk into the break room to find the whole team there and Ecklie looking as though he's about to blow a gasket.
"I suppose this was your idea." He says as soon as he sees me.
"What was my idea?" I ask looking around the room in confusion. Whatever it is that's going on it has Greg, Nick and Warrick looking very pleased with themselves.
"She had no idea Conrad. I told you I wanted my team back together and I meant it, I wasn't talking short term."
"You can not do this; this is the most ridiculous thing I've ever heard." He practically shouts.
"No, that would be your reason for transferring Sara." Nick says.
"Will someone tell me what's going on?" I ask.
"Nothing really, we've just all handed in our resignations in protest." Greg says with a huge smile.
"You've what?" I say. They can not be serious. "What the hell has got into you people?" I ask, shaking me head. Everyone has gone mad.
"As I told Conrad." Grissom says, keeping his eyes on Ecklie. "We're a team; we didn't work so hard to get Nick back just to lose Sara. You suspended her for insubordination, which I understand. But had it been anyone else, you know you would have reacted differently. Conrad knows he has no real grounds to transfer her, but he also knows that one CSI being transferred will go unnoticed so he thinks he can get away with it. However, when the whole night shift resigns; his supervisors will start asking questions."
"Questions that we will all be more than happy to answer." Warrick adds. "You see Ecklie, I don't think your boss will be pleased when your best team resigns, especially not when he finds out why, this might be your lab but the buck does not stop with you."
I don't think I've ever seen Ecklie this pissed off. "As I told her, I won't allow personal relationships in my lab." He states.
"I'll be sure to tell them that you decided on that little rule after you asked me out." I say, finally finding my voice. Up until then I had done nothing but stand there in shock, trying to take in what was happening.
"You had no real reason to transfer's Sara and you know it. I was wondering though, was it just because you don't like her? Or because you found out about the relationship after you asked Catherine out and realised you'd made an ass of yourself?" Nick asks him.
Ecklie turns to him and I'm convinced there's about to be more than one of us leaving. Thankfully Gil cuts him off.
"So Conrad, it's up to you."
"You can't do this, it's blackmail." He says, turning to face Grissom.
"No, it's a fact, Sara goes, we all go. You had absolutely no grounds to transfer's her; I'm just giving you the opportunity to rectify that mistake. If you're so sure you haven't done anything wrong then accept our resignations, if your actions were justified you won't have any problems."
"Fine." He says the anger clear in his voice. "She can come back, in two weeks, she's suspended till then, but they will not work the same cases." He says, determined to get some sort of victory.
"As you wish." Grissom replies.
I watch as Ecklie turns and storms out of the break room. Things are going to be fun with him for a while.
"Did that just happen?" I ask in total disbelief. "Sara can come back?"
"Hell yeah it did. Way to go Grissom." Nick says as a huge grin takes over his face.
"Nicely done Gris, I knew you were the boss for a reason." Warrick says. "I was worried for a second that he wouldn't go for it."
"You are officially my new hero." Greg announces. "That was the coolest thing I've ever seen." He'd been pretty quiet until now but he's practically dancing around the room and I can't help smile. I know how much he thinks of Sara.
"I can't believe you all did this. You are all officially insane." I say in total awe of the people in front of me. "Not that I'm not thankful for that insanity right now."
"No need for thanks. We want her back just as much as you." Grissom says, looking very happy indeed.
"I have to tell Sara." I say, realising she has no idea what just happened.
I get one foot out the door before returning to give each of the guys a hug. I can not describe how grateful I am to them right now.
"You are all crazy, but I love you." I joke. "Now excuse me, but I gotta find my girlfriend."
***
Ecstatic is not the word for what I'm feeling as I head over to Sara's apartment. I am truly in awe of what our friends have just done for us.
I get to Sara's but she doesn't answer the door. I realise it's still early, she's not expecting me for a few hours so I call, in case she's sleeping and didn't hear me knock. Still no answer, she must have stayed at my place. So I head back to the car and call home so she's awake when I get there. I start to worry a little when I get no answer there either. Where the hell is she? I try her cell but it's off. I call the lab on the off chance she's there but still nothing.
I feel the worry building as I try to think of where she could be. I reach my place ten minutes later having convinced myself something has happened. I grab my cell as I get out the car all ready to phone Jim.
As I shut the car door I catch a glimpse of Sara sitting on my doorstep. Oh thank god.
"Sara? Is everything okay?" I ask as I get closer.
I notice the suitcase she's sitting on. Why the hell does she have that?
As she raises her eyes to meet mine I notice her tear stained cheeks. It seems we've both been doing a lot of that this past week.
"I'm sorry." She states.
I'm about to ask her what for when it dawns on me.
"You were going to leave?" I ask, hoping she'll deny it.
"I couldn't." She says as she stands up and steps closer to me.
I step back a little; I'm not sure what I'm feeling right now, beyond shock.
"You were weren't you? What the fuck Sara?"
"Catherine just listen please." She practically begs.
I shake my head and walk past her opening my front door. I don't want to do this outside.
Sara follows me inside. I immediately start pacing up and down my living room, trying to get my head around this.
She starts to say something but I raise a hand and cut her off.
"Let me get this straight, and don't you dare interrupt me. You were going to leave without even saying goodbye? After everything we've been through these past few weeks, after me telling you over and over that I love you, that I'll support whatever you decide, that I'll do whatever I have to do to make sure we stay together. After all that you were going to leave like this?"
"Catherine it..."
"Yes or no Sara." I demand.
"Yes." She whispers, but I heard it loud and clear.
I feel the tears well up at her admission and the anger start to build.
"Get out." I tell her. I feel my heart breaking at the thought of what she was about to do. How could she?
"What?" She asks, shock evident in her voice.
"Get out. Go. Leave. Isn't that what you wanted anyway? Since you don't even think enough of me to say goodbye I don't want you here."
"Catherine you don't mean that." She says as she shakes her head at me.
"Don't I?"
"No, you're just upset."
"You're damn right I am. I had been under some stupid impression that you loved me, clearly I was mistaken." I say, feeling the tears fall; I turn away from her not wanting her to see how upset I am.
Seconds later I feel her hands on my hips, turning me to face her, the fire in her eyes momentarily stunning me, giving her enough time to trap me between her body and the wall.
I go to tell her to move but she cuts me off. "My turn." She tells me. Oh this best be good.
"You can say whatever the hell you want about me leaving, yell at me, tell me to get out, hit me if you want. But don't you ever, ever tell me that I don't love you, don't ever even think it." The pure determination in her voice keeps me quiet as she continues.
"Yes I was going to go, because I'm a coward. I knew I had to go if I wanted to keep my job. But I knew if I had to say goodbye to you and Lindsey I wouldn't be able to do it because of how much I love you both. I would have called as soon as I got there and told you. I knew you'd be angry, just as you are now but I knew it was the only way I would be able to leave."
I feel the anger start slowly start to leave me at her words. I understand her motive, I know leaving her would kill me but she should not have done it, not this way.
"So why are you here now?" I ask.
"I couldn't do it. I didn't even get out of the cab at the airport."
"Why?" I'm so not giving her an easy ride here.
Her hands move from the wall to my hips and I automatically place my hands over hers, watching as she smiles at the gesture.
"Because I love you. Because I don't want my job if it means being away from you and Lindsey. It took all of two seconds to realise that, once the reality set in that I was actually about to leave I knew it just wasn't going to happen, screw the job, I'll get another one." She smiles.
"Are you serious?" I'm fully aware of how much her job means to her.
"Never more so. I thought about the promise I made to Lindsey when we first got together and how I'd be breaking it if I left. I promised her I'd never intentionally do anything to hurt you. I don't ever intend breaking that promise."
"So why not take the case home and act like nothing happened?"
"You deserve better than that. I screwed up. I want to do whatever I can to make it right."
"You're damn right I deserve better. I deserve better than this whole thing Sara."
"I know." She says, the honesty in her voice telling me she means it.
Her hands fall from my hips and she backs away from me. "I should leave. I just needed you to listen to me. You need to think about this, about whether you still want to be with me." She says as she keeps backing away from me and I can hear her voice breaking as she finishes talking. Oh I don't think so Sara.
"Don't you dare." I say as she reaches the sofa.
"Stay exactly where you are." I walk over to her and push her onto the sofa, straddling her thighs as soon as she sits down, stopping any future attempts she might make to leave.
"You are not going anywhere. No I haven't forgiven you, we have a lot more talking to do and if you so much as think about doing anything like this in future then we are finished. Understand?"
"Yes."
"Good because I mean it. But tonight you are staying right here with me. Okay?" Like she has a choice.
"More than okay, are we going to be all right?"
I'm still pissed at her but I do understand why she did it and the fact that she didn't leave, or lie about her intention to do so tells me how much she loves me. I love her far too much to throw it away over a mistake like this.
"Eventually." I tell her.
She doesn't reply, just wraps her arms around me and buries her face in my neck.
My stomach starts to settle, the nerves and anger slipping away only to be replaced by a new type of panic, one that makes me hold Sara as tight as possible, realising how close I came to almost losing her.
I tangle my hands in her hair and pull her head back needing to make eye contact. "I love you." I tell her before capturing her lips with mine, cutting off her reply.
I press myself into her as much as I can, having an overwhelmingly need to feel her, to know she's here with me. I need this connection with her.
I attach my mouth to her neck when she pulls back from our kiss.
"Cat, stop, I don't think we should..."
"Shh." I cut her off. "I need to feel you, touch me baby, please." I take her hands and place them on my hips. "Please." I say against her lips as I kiss her once more.
I sigh into our kiss as I feel her give in and start to move her hands up my sides. I break the kiss and pull my top over my head, making quick work of my bra I return my lips to hers. I whimper into her mouth as her hands slowly tease up my stomach, groaning when she finally cups my breasts. I tear my mouth away from hers and groan once more as she focuses her attention on my nipples. My head falls back as the pleasure starts building within me and her mouth moves to my neck.
Her kisses move to my chest as her hands move lower, ignoring my disappointed groan, she undoes my pants then moves her attention to my ass. She teases my breasts with her lips and tongue, I know she loves to do this but I need to feel her now. "Sara." I gasp as I drag her head up to make eye contact once more. "No teasing. I need this." I demand. She nods, hopefully understanding the meaning behind my statement.
Thankfully she relents and takes an aching nipple in her hot mouth. "Uh. God." Is all I manage as I hold her head in place, my back arching, offering myself to her. I watch her as she kisses her way to my other breast and almost come at the sight and feel of her tongue swirling around my hard nipple.
I can't wait any more; I have to feel her now. I take one of her wandering hands and guide it into my panties. "Touch me here." I demand.
I groan her name hard as her fingers slip into my heat. "God baby don't stop." I gasp and my hips start moving, the pleasure threatening to overwhelm me as her fingers speed up. "Inside." I somehow manage to gasp out as I pull her head up, needing to see her.
When her fingers finally slip inside me I think I actually stop breathing, it feels so good. "Mine." I growl at her as I roll my hips, slowly grinding myself into her thrusting fingers.
"Yours." She replies as I feel her fingers curl with each thrust.
I hear myself whimper as white hot pleasure starts to overwhelm me and the fire starts spreading through my body. I bury my face in her neck and scream her name as I come hard, the force of my climax leaving my body shaking in total exhaustion as I collapse against her.
I return to my senses long moments later, feeling her arms around me, holding me close as she whispers in my ear how much she loves me.
"Thank you." I tell her once I have the strength to lift my head and look at her. "I needed to feel you, feel close to you." I tell her.
"I know. I'm sorry. If it wasn't for my stupidity you wouldn't have..."
"Not now Sara." I cut her off. "Well talk later; please just take me to bed and hold me."
She nods and helps me to my feet. I take her hand and lead her to the bedroom.
"I'll call Nancy. She'll take Linds to school." I tell Sara as we enter the bedroom.
She just nods and changes as I call my sister.
Only when I slide into bed do I realise how exhausted I am, both mentally and physically and I sigh in contentment as Sara pulls me into her arms.
***
I slide into wakefulness only to find myself alone in bed. I stretch and contemplate going back to sleep until I see the time and realise I only have a few hours before I have to get Lindsey.
"Morning beautiful." Sara says as she enters the bedroom, cup of coffee in hand. "Sleep well?"
"Mmm Hmm." I reply, sitting up, taking the coffee from her and grabbing a quick kiss.
"I called Nancy; she'll get Lindsey from school and drop her off a little later so we can talk."
"Okay. I'll phone Gil. I'm not up to work tonight." I tell her.
"I'm making food. You want?" She asks as she heads back out the room.
"Yeah, be there in a ten, just going to grab a shower."
I can't help think about the emotional roller coaster that was last night as I shower and dress, I pray to god I don't go through anything like this again soon.
Grabbing the phone as I enter the living room so I can phone Gil. As soon as I pick the phone up I stop dead in my tracks, I haven't told Sara she has her job back. Oh my god. With everything that happened last night it was the furthest thing from my mind. Good god, how could I have forgotten that?
I throw the phone down and make my way into the kitchen, trying to hide the huge smile on my face.
"Here you go." Sara says as she hands me a plate of pancakes and heads to the table with her own.
I follow her and grab a seat, not really sure how to bring it up. Just telling her is far too easy.
"So I guess we should talk." She says.
"Yeah." I say.
"You're looking very pleased with yourself." She says, eyeing me sceptically.
"Why shouldn't I be?" I ask.
"Well, seeing as how we almost broke up last night, thanks to my stupidity, and how your girlfriend is officially unemployed right now, this was not what I was expecting."
I can't help smile again as she speaks. Oh how I love teasing her.
"But we didn't break up and we're not going to and erm, about that unemployment thing, that isn't happening either." I say, giving her a huge smile.
"Excuse me?" She asks.
"Gil got you your job back, well, Gil, Warrick, Nick and Greg actually. I came home early to tell you this morning but with everything that happened I forgot. I'm sorry."
"Say that again. I have my job back?" She asks, clearly in disbelief.
"You're suspended for another two weeks and we can't work the same case but yes you have your job."
I squeal in surprise as I'm dragged from my chair to my feet and into her arms and in a very un-Sara-like moment she picks me up and twirls me around the kitchen.
"I take it you're happy." I tease when she puts me back down.
"Ecstatic is more like it. This does not happen to me. I never get the 'happy ever after', things usually mess up." She says giving me a breathtaking smile.
"Yeah, well don't jinx it baby." I joke.
"Seriously. Happy doesn't cover how I feel right now. Tell me what happened." She says as she drags me to the sofa and sits us both down.
I spend the next half an hour telling her exactly what happened and how it happened.
"I can't believe that they did that for me." She says for the fifth time.
"Sara, they love you. As Gil said, we didn't work that hard to get Nick back just to lose you."
"I have the most amazing friends in the world." She announces.
"I won't disagree." I reply. I owe them just as much as she does.
"I'm thinking I should stay away from Ecklie from now on." She jokes.
"I'm thinking we all should." I laugh.
"Seriously though, I owe them so much. I don't think I'll ever be able to thank them enough."
"Me either baby." I tell her as I lean in for a kiss.
"Come on." She says as I pull back.
"What?" I ask as I'm dragged to my feet.
"We're going to get Lindsey and we're going to celebrate." She declares, dragging me towards the door.
A few hours later Sara, Lindsey and I are curled up in my bed watching TV. Some film of the week Lindsey wanted to watch, not that I'm paying much attention. I'm just happy to be here with them both. Both Lindsey and I are using Sara as a pillow, I'd feel sorry for her but she's way too comfy, plus, she's not complaining.
"Hey Sara." Lindsey asks, not even bothering to lift her head.
"Yeah."
"That your suitcase in the living room?"
"Yeah."
"Are you moving in?" She asks.
I feel Sara's body tense and can just imagine the panic washing over her face right about now. I'd laugh but I fear she'd kill me. Thank you Lindsey. I've been trying to bring this up for a few weeks now.
"Yeah Sara, are you moving in?" I ask as I lift my head from her shoulder to look at her.
"Catherine?" She says as her eyes search mine.
"I mean, your clothes are already here and everything." I joke.
"A little seriousness Catherine." She states, making me smile even more.
"Move in with me, with us." I ask.
"Lindsey?" She asks, her eyes never leaving mine.
"Just say yes already, she'll convince you anyway and I'm trying to watch this."
Sara chuckles before replying. "I guess I'm moving in then."
"Sweet." Lindsey says.
I lean down to kiss her; I don't have words for how happy she's just made me.
"If you two don't stop that, I'll go watch this in the living room." Linds declares without so much as moving.
"Yes mom." I say with a laugh, oh how I love my daughter.
I settle myself back down to watch the film, wrapping myself around Sara. Oh yeah, this would be me being happy.
Tonight was Sara's first night back at work tonight and I have to admit I'm nervous, I'm not sure why but I am. Everyone is really happy to have her back and she practically ran out of the house tonight.
She's been out all night on a case with Nick and Greg and having wrapped up my case halfway through shift I've been sat in my office attempting to get some paperwork done. I really wanted to phone her but I didn't want it to seem as if I were checking up on her.
"Hi."
I hear as Sara walks into my office, closing the door behind her. Even now, we've been together for months and just the sight of her makes me giddy.
"Can I help you?" I tease.
"Ah well, that depends." She says with a smile. "I have a personal problem."
I get up and walk around my desk to stand in front of her. "I'll do whatever it takes to help." I state as I let my eyes wonder over her body. Damn she's sexy.
"You see, I have this girlfriend."
"Right." I reply, returning my eyes to hers.
"I'm crazy in love with her." She says, stepping a little closer.
"That's a problem?" I ask, raising an eyebrow.
"Oh no, the problem is that she is so beautiful." She steps closer still, pressing herself into me. I feel my body responding to her automatically. "So damn sexy." Her hands move to my hips, pulling my flush against her. Her mouth is inches away from mine and I know I won't be able to fight the urge to kiss her for much longer. "That I can't seem to concentrate on anything else, my mind is constantly filled with thoughts of her."
"I think I have the same problem." I manage to say.
"All I've thought about all night is her, how soft her skin is, how her mouth feels on mine, her body beneath mine, how she sounds as she climaxes under my touch." Oh god, what this woman does to me.
"Pity she isn't here, I'd have to kiss her right now if she was." She practically purrs into my ear.
She knows exactly how she's affecting me; I will get her back for this. "I'm here."
"She's the jealous type." She says as she brushes my lips with hers.
"She'll get over it." I say as I grab the back of her head and bring her mouth to mine. Good lord can she kiss. The feel of her tongue moving against mine makes me week in the knees.
"Damn." She gasps when we break apart.
I can't help but laugh at her reaction. "Shouldn't start things you can't finish here Sidle." I tell her.
"Oh I can finish... Your desk okay?" She asks pushing me backwards, a mischievous smile firmly in place.
"Stop it you." I tell her, slapping her on the arm. "Do not tempt me."
"Why not?" She asks leaning in for another kiss.
"Come on you two, break it up." I hear Nick say as he opens my office door. "I did knock, can't think why you didn't hear me."
"I don't like him any more." Sara jokes as she buries her face in my neck.
"He's just jealous baby." I tell her as I extract myself from her arms.
"Yeah, but what can you do." Nick jokes. "We have a lead Sara. Are you two going to be like this all the time from now on?"
"Yep." I tell him.
"Great. Greg will be pleased." He laughs.
"Okay so maybe not all the time." Sara laughs. "Right, I have work to do. Guess it's back to normal. See you later babe."
"Bye you two." I shout after them.
Normal. I think to myself, as I sit down to get on with some work. Normal for me now is Sara and Lindsey, an actual family. Oh yeah, I'm definitely happy.
End
***
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