Title: Nine
By: sarcasticsra
Summary: Should vs. is.
Pairing: None. Nick-centric ficlet.
Rating: PG-13 for sensitive subjects
Warnings: Mentions of molestation.
A/N: Thanks to Kelly for the beta.

***

He'd been nine.

Nine-year-olds were supposed to be concerned about cooties, tearing up their jeans, and getting mud on the carpet. They were supposed to want to stay up too late and then fall asleep early when they were finally allowed. Nine-year-olds were busy trying to be like their older siblings, idolizing them, following them around, and generally being a pest. That was what nine-year-olds were supposed to be like.

They were not supposed to be solemn, serious, frightened little boys who curled up at night in their bed, pulling the covers around them and feeling dirty. They weren't supposed to feel ashamed of their bodies, like they were disgusting or wrong.

Nine-year-olds were supposed to be children.

They were not required to grow up too quickly, to keep to themselves more than was healthy, to never tell a soul - until much, much later - about what happened to them. They were supposed to be happy, have fun, and not have to deal with feelings and emotions that confused people three times their age.

These children were not supposed to run in fear when they heard the words "baby-sitter."

Nine-year-olds - or any children, ever - were not supposed to be molested. They were not supposed to have their innocence taken from them like that, cruelly ripped from their grasp, shattering a part of them forever, scarring them.

But regardless of what was supposed to happen, it happened to Nick Stokes anyway, and it'd always be a part of him.

He wished things were like they were supposed to be.

-End