Title: October Winter
Author: Physco Wolf
Pairing: Cath/Sara
Rating: G
A/N: For my fallen brother in arms Jeff...You'll be missed till I meet you up there.
Summary: On October 12,2006 Sara's brother in arms died on the first snow of the year...

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On October 12, 2006 the first snow of the year fell. The snow meant a cold death and Sara Sidle could feel it coming. She could feel it in her blood, in her veins, and in her heart. The cold October skies could tell you that death was coming, and there was no way you could miss it.

The first snow of the year had claimed Sara Sidle's brother from afar. They were childhood friends and faced a thousand deaths of torment from living on the streets. Battle after battle, drink after drink, and blood for blood. He was her brother in combat, her combat in life, and her brother in arms. Through thick and thin they were always a pair. Fight after fight till the end. If one went down the other picked them up and carried them...even through betrayal.

He taught her everything she knew. How to fight, how to breathe, how to live. Sure, bad aspects were thrown in but that could be changed within time and a new found strength.

He called you kiddo when you stood your ground on the battle field. He fought for you when you were too weak to fight. He was your brother in arms till the end. That was a vow he made and so was the vow you made to him.

Standing over the edge of the roof where you two once stayed, you feel empty and hollow since your brother in arms is not there to make you laugh or make you angry. The roof top feels empty and so does your heart, he betrayed you but you still needed him. He taught you everything so you couldn't just leave behind, otherwise you would go back on your word. Your honor and pride kept you together. Your honor and pride would never die even years after. Honor and pride kept you alive. He may have betrayed your honor and pride but you knew hidden deep inside it was still there.

The October winter sky held you in its cold wake as you breathed in death. He may have been hated for what he had done to you but you always kept your vow of the gang. Even in death and betrayal you are honored among gangs. Three days of peace is what was granted for your death among gangs across the town. You were respected for your glory and power and wounds. But now you'll only be remembered as Jeff the betrayer of gangs.

Your lover held you tight that fateful night of the first snow of the year. You failed to hide your silent tears of sorrow as you sat on your bed. She came up behind you and wrapped her arms around you. Her blonde hair fell on your humble shoulders and her blue eyes shed tears of grief onto your cheek. She told you everything was going to be alright. You let her hold you tight for once instead of you holding her. You cried out your tears of sorrow and kept your pride and honor in place as shed one last tear. His birth, his betrayal, and his death had all affected your life and you repaid him by fighting for him, his wounds, his blood.

All that you gave you thought was never enough but you gave so much that it almost killed you. Your blood was given for his protection, his safety and yet you still feel that it wasn't enough. You would've taken the bullet for him and you'd still feel that it wasn't enough.

The first lesson he taught you is still fresh in your mind as you recite his words, "Only the strong survive." You know its true and you believe in every word of it. You grew into a warrior and a lover and still felt that that wasn't enough. He never said he wasn't proud of you for anything. He was proud of every little thing you did. He was even proud of you when you fought him.

On October 12, 2006 your brother in arms died. He left you the lessons of life, and how to be strong. He taught you how to love, he taught you how grieve, he taught you life.

As you stand over his tombstone your lover hugs you and you feel the warmth of life and your brother in arms looking over you.

Brother In Arms

and

Long Lost Brother

Jeff S.

1988-2006

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