Title: It was one of those days
By: Croag
Pairing: Mac/Danny
Rating: NC-17
A/N: This was written a while ago for a secret santa exchange. So uh...this is a gift to my secret santa buddy. (I'm too lazy to look them up, I'll just edit this part...later.) So this is shown through a "mysterious" POV. And uhh...slash. Yes. Warning! Slash! Mac/Danny!
Summary: Fluffyhumor shown from a mysterious POV, starting with those famous words, it had all started so normal...

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The day had started out so normal, you know? Just your everyday "Hey, look! A dead body!" case. Thirty minutes later?

Danny's being held at gunpoint by the dead body, which obviously isn't as dead as we thought, and now Flack and I have our guns trained on the guy, Flack's screaming at the perp to let go of Danny, and I'm wondering how the hell this all happened! Does anyone know?

Wait.

Back track.

I need to start at the beginning, right?

Well, like I said, it started the same as everyday, and the same as every case. Little old lady next door found the dead body sprawled out on the porch, bullet hole in the head. The house was abandoned, and she didn't recognize the vic. The uniforms arrived, "secured" the scene, and called us. And by us, I mean Danny and me.

Obviously.

We get there, Flack starts rattling off what they know about the dead guy, and right when we see the vic...Danny freaks, and the body just up and grabs him, putting a gun to his head. Flack and I jumped back, guns at the ready, and it's been a yelling standoff ever since. At the time, during the blur of action, I could only remember thinking, 'How the hell did this guy get a gun?' I yelled at a uniform to get Mac, and then yelled some more because they obviously didn't check to see if the guy was dead (Shouldn't that be in "securing a scene 101"?). The perp exclaimed the cliché, "No one else move or Messer gets it!" And I think, 'Messer? How's this guy know his name?' but I don't ask, because really...I had other things to worry about.

Like Danny having a gun to his head.

And now we're here.

Stuck in the standoff from hell. And where is Mac? I glanced at Flack, who was still screaming, spit flying and face turning red.

Well...yelling at the guy obviously doesn't do shit. I focused back on the perp, and forced my voice to be calm.

Mellow.

Zen. Totally Zen.

I am the guru of calm.

Wait no, that's Mac.

Fuck it, I'm still calm and serene and not worried as hell.

I opened my mouth, waiting for the Zen words of persuasion to flow out...and then I realized I didn't know the guy's name.

Shit.

"Sir!" Best I can do, "Whatever it is you want, fine. You can have it, just put the gun down and let CSI Messer go, okay?" For all my troubles, I got a sneer. And an ugly at one at that.

Danny's grit his teeth, wildly struggling with the perp, yelling colorful words like "Goddamn it! Fuck! Shit! Motherfucker! Goddamned bag of dog shit, you fuckin' asswipe!" In any other circumstances, I would've been proud. But now?

"Danny! Just stay calm, alright? Everything's going to be fine." He just glared at me and growled,

"This ass has me at gunpoint! Do something!" Flack resumed yelling, I bit my lip.

Where the hell are you, Mac?

And like a beacon from God, the knight in shining armor (speaking of armor, where the fuck is his bullet proof vest?), the head honcho himself comes barging in, guns literally a' blazing. Of course, he and a handful of SWAT used the back entrance, coming from behind. The perp panicked, Mac grabbed Danny, and SWAT took the guy down. It was a wonderful sight. Very surreal and dramatic...like a movie.

I should talk to MGM...

Or at least some book publisher.

CSI: New York. Sound catchy enough. Flack rushes to make sure the perp is now the goddamned vic (for real, this time), and I'm reminded why I love that detective.

He's smart; not all brawns and no brains.

I started to walk away from the whole scene: Flack leaning over the bloodied body, Mac alternating between growling at the said body and worriedly hovering over Danny while the EMTs checked him over. And when, exactly, did that ambulance get here?

Shaking my head, I kept on going, when a warm hand was on my shoulder, stopping me. Glancing back, I was met with solemn eyes.

Mac.

I smiled, lips turned up just enough to barely qualify as a smile.

"Hey. Good timing." he met my smile with an even smaller one.

"Thanks for keeping Danny alive. You did good." My grin widened, playfully punching him in the arm.

"I know." I gestured to the scowling Danny, who was still being hounded by the EMTs, "I think you should go back to your boy, before he gives those poor guys ulcers, hm?" I winked, and Mac, not to my surprise, stayed impassive.

"Yeah," he turned to go, stopped, and glanced back at me, "Could you take care of-"

"The paperwork?" He nodded, I grinned, "What are friends for? Well, I mean...what are friends and bonuses, maybe a raise, for?" he chuckled and went back to Danny. I went back to the lab.

Paperwork.

Yes...!

I better at least get a bonus.

Hours later, I'm packing up. It's dark out, night shift is running around, and I'm done with the paperwork. Mac owes me big.

I made it all the way to the parking garage...

...when I stopped, rolling my eyes with a "Drat!"

My coat.

Oh yeah.

Sighing, I turned back and went to my locker. Muttering under my breath, I started to unlock my locker...when I hear it.

Voices.

Blinking, I look around, but didn't see a thing (except for a bunch of lockers, but do those count?). Shaking my head, I went back to my lock.

Great, I'm hearing things.

But then I hear them again. Following the noise, peaking over a row of lockers, I blinked in surprise.

Danny and Mac.

Sitting on a bench.

I'm reminded of that kid's rhyme.

Danny and Mac.

Sitting on a bench.

K-I-S-S-I-N-G (And wow, what a kodak moment that would be!)

First comes love, then comes marriage, then comes...oh damn, how did the rest go?

Hiding behind the lockers again, acknowledging the fact that yes, their conversation was none of my business...except I've known Mac for forever so I deserve to know. That, and I'm nosy. I strained my ears, trying to turn the sounds into words.

"I mean...are you sure?" Danny sounded small, unsure; confused. I grinned. Success!

"I'm sure, Danny. I nearly lost you...again. An officer drove to the lab-" so that's what took so long, "and told me what was happening. You know what he said? CSI Messer's being held at gun point. That's all he told me. I rushed over there, and you have no idea how many scenarios I came up with. How many different ways I could find you. And believe me, none of them were good."

"Pessimist." A low chuckle.

"Yeah, I guess I am." There were a few seconds of silence, then, "I'm tired of hiding, Danny. I don't care about the lab's reputation anymore. None of it matters without you with me. None." Wow...Mac being sappy. Never thought I'd hear that one. Not even with Claire.

"But that guy was Tanglewood! He was after me! If the Tanglewood boys are after me, Mac, I could put you and the lab in-"

"I know. And I'm not happy with it, but I'm still not letting you out of my sight."

"Mac..." I heard a series of smooches, and then the name again...except now it sounded less like a warning and more like a moan, "Mac..." more smooches, more moans, and the sound of a zipper. My eyes widened.

They weren't!

"Oh, god yes!" Pants were tossed, landing next to me. I gaped at them.

They were!

Danny, you dog! Today of all days? Damn...!

...I was torn between laughing, leaving, or staying (while being absolutely "mortified" of course...), but then the next words chose for me.

"Mac, please! pleasepleasepleasepleasepleasepleaseplease!" Oh wow. I couldn't resist, I peaked over the lockers, and saw (And I'm not sure if it was hot or disturbing because it was Mac, for god's sake!) Danny lying on the bench. Pants gone (and now I know who's those were), shirt opened up, revealing firm, glistening abs, eyes squeezed shut as he tossed his head back, moaning like a cat in heat. Body slick with a fine sheen of sweat. Danny's back arched up while my boss was between his legs...his head bobbing back and forth.

My eyebrows rose at least ten feet. I was that shocked!

Mac, didn't know you had it in you! And with Danny no less!

Should I be surprised?

I kept on staring, while Danny started to hump the air. A pair of hands appeared on his hips, keeping him down. Slim fingers running through Mac's hair, a mantra of, "Macmacmacmacmacmacmacmacmac!" which quickly turned into, "Ohgodohgodohgodohgodohgodohgod! Oh God, I'm gonna' cum!" Eyes clenched tight, fingers grasping at more strands of brown hair. Danny let out another moan, low and guttural and feral, as his body jerked. Eyes flying open with his mouth as a Euphoria of pleasure hit, overwhelming him.

"Mac!" I'd be lying if I said this wasn't one of the hottest things I've seen. It wasn't the hottest scene ever, and that one will never but mentioned (By way of bribery)...but it had to do with Flack, Aiden, bananas and whip cream. That's all I'm saying. Lost in my thoughts, a lazy smile on my face, I didn't notice Danny still staring ahead...straight at me. His mouth opened in a silent, panicked "O".

"Mac!" I never thought it was possible for a grown man to squeak.

"Danny!" it came out as a grunt. The young CSI sprang up, quickly buttoning up his shirt, wildly looking around for his pants or his boxers. Mac slowly looked up to see what the hell his boyfriend was doing when -Damn! That man jumps up faster than Danny!- he noticed me.

"Stella!" He made a lame attempt to cover himself with his hands. I grinned, and picked up Danny's pants, waving them in the air.

"Looking for these?" I don't think I've ever seen a man get so red. I raised an eyebrow, looking him up and down.

So...Danny blushes all over. Next thing I know, Mac's glaring at me and I just raise an eyebrow.

What's he gonna' do, tell on me? He kept on glaring, I kept on grinning. Finally, I just sighed and tossed Danny his pants.

"Well Mac, it's good to see you're getting out more." I waved, the grin on my face threatening to explode into full blown peals of laughter, "Have fun." I winked, grabbed my coat from my locker, and left. Once I got in my car, I sat there...

...and started to giggle...and soon my giggles turned into full blown laughter as my body shook over the steering wheel.

Oh jesus...this was priceless.

The next morning I entered the lab with a hum, opened my locker...and laughed. There, next to a "mysterious" vase of roses, was a simple note:

Tell anyone anything, and kiss that bonus and raise (Which are in the VERY near future...) goodbye.

-Mac

I shook my head, stuffed the note into my pocket, put my coat up, and walked straight into Danny.

He stared at me, starting to sputter my name.

"St-stella! Uh...I...I...listen, about-" I smiled and slipped him Mac's note. After a few seconds, he looked up from the paper, absolutely speechless.

"Stella? Why did you-" I cheerfully swung an arm around his shoulders and led him to the meeting room. Leaning into his ear, I just couldn't resist whispering,

"Bribery, huh? Must be love." I laughed, letting go of Danny, and leaving him behind in an utter state of confusion.

It was time to say "Hi" to Mac.

A/N: Yeah...not good with the fluff or the smut. It was a first for both! Did ma' best!

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