Save a Horse, Ride a Pirate

It was Warrick's fault. Well actually it was most likely Greg's fault for leaving his stereo where Warrick could find it…but at least the lab hadn't been subjected to a variety of loud and obnoxious tunes all day long…

See that boy standing there by the dance floor
He's lookin' like the Marlboro Man
Starched shirt, starched jeans, big trophy buckle
And an empty Copenhagen can
He's talkin' cowboy this and cowboy that
Well I'll bet one thing's for sure
The only stampede that he's ever seen
Is the clearance at the western store

With a charmingly innocent smile, and very definite Pirate gleam in his eye, Warrick busied himself around the lab, singing along to the words, knowing full well he was driving Nick nuts.

The General glared at him every time he walked past, but Warrick wasn't falling for that scowl. It might've worked on motivating Legionnaires, but it wasn't going to intimidate the Pirate.

No sir…

All hat and no cattle, that boy just ain't real
All boots and no saddle, don't know how to make a cowgirl feel
Think I'm gonna tell him to pack up his act
And go back where he came from
'Cause all hat and no cattle ain't gonna get it done

For the last week, ever since the 'maple syrup' incident, Warrick had been teasing his mate about his 'Texas-Boy' image. He'd even bought him a Stetson, with the promise of many nights to remember if he'd wear in bed for him. Nick however, was determined not to bite…

…well, not under THOSE circumstances anyway.

He's just a smooth-talkin', long-tall slow-walkin'
Drugstore-made-up dude
So honey don't you fall for that fake Texas drawl
He ain't right for you
What you need's a man that ain't just a hat stand
When you get him home
Well, I don't look like much, but I can sure saddle up
And ride with you all night long

All hat and no cattle, that boy just ain't real
All boots and no saddle, don't know how to make a cowgirl feel
Think I'm gonna tell him to pack up his act
And go back where he came from
'Cause all hat and no cattle ain't gonna get it done

So he kept on scowling, and he secretly plotted.

He was going for groceries. Nothing suspicious in that. It was his turn to get them. But still Warrick gave Nick that 'yeah right!' look as he walked out to his car.

Well, I walk into the room
Passing out hundred dollar bills
And it kills and it thrills like the horns on my Silverado grill
And I buy the bar a double round of Crown
And everybody's getting down
An' this town ain't never gonna be the same.

Early morning traffic was a bitch. Nick wound the windows down, turned the radio up and was amused to find more Western music coming at him loud and clear.

And before he realized it was singing along, tapping his hands on the steering wheel, belting out the words without really giving a damn what the other drivers around him were thinking as they made their way into work.

Cause I saddle up my horse
And I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
On my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy

Strange how his thoughts kept drifting to Tony's mate Gibbs every time the line 'On my old stud Leroy' came round and he started having images that certainly weren't quite what he had in mind for getting revenge on his wicked Pirate.

Well I don't give a dang about nothing
I'm singing and Bling- Blanging
While the girls are drinking
Long necks down!
And I wouldn't trade ol' Leroy
Or my Chevrolet for your Escalade
Or your freak parade
I'm the only John Wayne left in this town

Nick was grinning from ear to ear when he pulled up at a 7/11. Considering the time of day it was just about the only place open, so he could grab a few things and get what he was really shopping for back into the house without a fuss.

Although he had to admit, there were times when he couldn't get a single thing past Warrick…

And I saddle up my horse
And I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
On my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy

Humming the same tune, Nick started substituting 'ride a cowboy' for 'ride a pirate', and as he reached for his favorite dessert in the cold cabinet, he realized from the sudden restriction in his jeans that he could be breaking the speed limit on the way home.

Yeah, that would do it…just thinking about getting stopped by highway patrol and trying to explain why he was on his own in the vehicle with a raging hard-on and no apparent relief in sight…that settled him down…for about all of ten seconds…

And I saddled up my horse
And I ride into the city
I make a lot of noise
Cause the girls
They are so pretty
Riding up and down Broadway
On my old stud Leroy
And the girls say
Save a horse, ride a cowboy.
Everybody says
Save a horse, Ride a cowboy

As it was setting up to be a really warm day, he contemplated a quick shower when he got home, and he actually managed to sneak his prize into the back of the refrigerator unnoticed before he headed to the bathroom.

Nick grinned, slipped it on at a rakish angle, grabbed the dessert cup he'd got nicely chilled, and turned to the bedroom with a wicked chuckle. Oddly he was still humming that tune to himself and replacing words in all the wrong places…

Said Pirate was indeed waiting for him, sprawled out naked on the covers, half asleep, blissfully content despite the climbing temperatures outside that already left his flesh faintly glistening with sweat, and that sight alone sent a small shudder of desire through Nick's body.

His handsome, dark-skinned mate was beautiful; one arm thrown casually behind his head, the other resting over his stomach, all angular lines and accentuated musculature in the shadows cast through the blinds. Nick licked his lips, put his dessert down by the bed, and pounced.

What? What?
Save A Horse Ride A Cowboy

Warrick's eyes flew open as the General straddled his hips and pushed the Stetson back from his forehead with a cheeky grin. Anything he might've contemplated saying about the sight of Nick wearing nothing but a cowboy hat, was quickly swallowed in a deep, very thorough kiss that made Warrick grateful for the fact that Vampires don't need to breathe.

Nick's tongue expertly explored every inch of his mouth, fast and hungry, and Warrick opened up to him, too startled to even contemplate arguing. His mate pressed him down onto the bed, taking his wrists and drawing his hands up to the headboard.

"Don't let go…" Nick murmured, curling Warrick's fingers around the metal rail, "…if you do, this'll be over way too soon…"

With a feral grin he dropped kisses down his mate's neck, nipping at his shoulder and over his chest, stopping to lavish attention on each nipple. As Warrick gasped and writhed beneath him, he ground his hips against his mate, winning for himself a deep and heartfelt moan.

Nick reached down over the edge of the bed for his little surprise, peeling back the lid and very carefully dripping chocolate pudding over his mate's chest and abdomen.

Warrick whimpered as the cool custard touched his heated skin. Trying to hold on to the head of the bed and wriggle away at the same time, he couldn't escape the General's wicked chuckle, or the firm insistent tongue that laved over his body, dipping repeatedly into his navel and over his nipples until there wasn't a speck of chocolate remaining.

Then when all that sweet, creamy goodness was gone, Nick moved further down, taking his mate's hard, throbbing cock into his mouth and sucking him down, swirling his tongue over the smooth, hot flesh as though it were a lollipop with a chocolate center.

The General took his mate to the very edge and pulled back, grinning, purring like a cat. He eyed his Pirate, all flushed and wonting. "Something wrong?"

With a growl, Nick reached for the lube in the bedside cabinet, slicking his mate with quick, easy strokes and preparing himself on his own fingers in such a way that Warrick had to bite his own lip to stop from coming right then.

"Not a real cowboy huh?" the older Vampire teased, pulling his Stetson over his eyes before sliding down onto his mate with agonizing slowness, letting the Pirate's thick hardness fill him inch by inch.

Warrick's head fell back on the pillow and he cried out softly, desperate to move, to raise his hips and slam into his mate's body again and again, but Nick was controlling this now, riding him with the most expert precision, and he could do little else but watch…

The General chuckled low in his throat, tightening around his Pirate, stroking himself in sync with each thrust of his hips, throwing his head back as orgasm crashed through him, yelling out to the heavens in release as he came over his mate's stomach. With another thrust onto Warrick's cock he felt his mate cum too and the hot flood of his seed spilled deep inside him.

The Pirate was panting, lost in his own climax for a moment, still clinging to the head of the bed until soft hands released his grip and Nick whispered hoarsely in his ear...