Title: Sword and Shield
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Ryan Wolfe
Fandom: CSI: Las Vegas/CSI: Miami
Rating: PG-13
Table: Fluff, mission_insane
Prompt: 3, Cuddle
Author's Note: Continuation of On A Cold Winter's Day.
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my own imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Ryan Wolfe, unfortunately, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

Ryan closed his eyes, taking a deep breath and then letting it out again on a contented sigh. There was nothing in the world that felt as good as cuddling with Greg, he told himself with an inward smile. Well, other than making love to Greg. Or maybe kissing him.

Just being with the man he loved was the best thing in the world as far as he was concerned, Ryan told himself, the inner smile becoming an outward one. If he could stay here in their apartment and be with Greg for the rest of his life, then he'd be the happiest man in the universe.

Cuddling with Greg like this always made him feel relaxed and comfortable, letting all of his guards down. That was something he hadn't been able to do for a long time before he came here to Vegas; there had been times when he was sure that he'd never be able to relax again.

Ever since the night when he'd been kidnapped by the Cuban mob, he'd stayed tense all the time; he was sure that he didn't relax even in his sleep. There was always a feeling of being like a coiled spring, wound tight and just waiting to explode all over the place.

But meeting Greg had changed all that. For the first time in what felt like forever, he was finally able to relax and let go, to let down all of those barriers that he'd kept up for so long. They were still up a lot of the time, but that was when he was working, not when he was here.

Greg had broken down those barriers on the first night they'd been together, even when they hadn't done more than simply hold each other and talk. It was amazing how relaxed this man had made him feel, how those walls he'd put up had seemed to melt away into nothingness.

Greg cuddled closer into his embrace, resting his head on Ryan's shoulder. The cocoa that Greg had made was still too hot to drink, and to Ryan's way of thinking, cuddling like this was a wonderful way to pass the time while they waited for their drinks to cool down.

And as the cocoa got cooler, they would more than likely raise each other's temperatures, he thought with another inward smile. That was fine with him; he might not want to make love right here on the couch, but he definitely didn't mind doing a little fooling around.

Still, for the moment, he didn't want to do anything but sit here on the couch with Greg in his arms, the two of them cuddled close together. The cold outside seemed to melt away, as though it didn't exist. It couldn't touch him, not while he was wrapped in the warmth of Greg's love.

"What are you thinking?" Greg asked, his voice very soft and husky. "I know there's got to be something on your mind for you to be this quiet. I don't think it's just because you're tired, and I don't think you've got sex on your mind, either. So what's going through that gorgeous head of yours?"

Ryan laughed softly, raising a hand to stroke Greg's hair. "I was just thinking that the cold can't affect me when I'm with you. All I have to do is look at you, and I'm warm. And that's not because you're hot. It has nothing to do with sex. It's because you love me so much."

"I feel the same way," Greg confessed, lifting his head from Ryan's shoulder to look at his boyfriend. "When you're around, I feel warm and safe and protected. I know that as long as you love me, nothing can get to me. It's like having a sword and shield to keep me safe."

"I've never thought of love as being like that, but I guess you're right," Ryan said, frowning slightly as he gave Greg's idea some thought. "I've always felt like love is having a big warm blanket to wrap around you, but I guess it could be looked at as a shield, too."

Greg considered his words, then nodded. "I like your idea better," he said, stretching out his long, lean body and cuddling more closely into Ryan's embrace. "It's like having this warmth around you that you know you can pull closer whenever you need to feel it."

"Exactly," Ryan said softly, smiling slightly. It always amazed him how quickly Greg could pick up on his ideas, or what he was feeling. The two of them really were destined for each other; if they weren't, then they wouldn't be so closely attuned to each other's feelings.

"Why is it that just cuddling with you like this can almost make me feel closer to you than when we're making love?" Greg asked, sounding truly curious. "I've always thought that sex is the closest you can get to another person, but I'm really starting to rethink that attitude."

"I feel closer to you after we make love," Ryan told him, hastening to add, "but I feel really close to you when we're in the middle of making love, too. It's intimacy in both situations, but it's a really different kind of intimacy. One is more in the moment, and the other is more relaxed."

Greg nodded in agreement. "I can see the difference. And one isn't better than the other. They're just two different ways of being together, and I enjoy them both. I don't have any preference for one over the other. And I don't care if this makes me sound selfish, but I want them both."

"And you can have them both," Ryan promised, bowing his head to brush his lips across the softness of Greg's hair. "I want them both, too. There's no law that says we can't have all the different kinds of intimacy we want. I enjoy all of them, and it's not selfish to want them all."

Greg nodded in answer, curling more comfortably into his embrace. Ryan closed his eyes, hugging his boyfriend closer against him, letting himself relax completely. He didn't think anything felt as good as holding Greg did -- sometimes this was even better than sex.

As much as he loved being intimately connected with Greg, there were so many times when he felt closer to his boyfriend when they just held each other like this. Their souls were at peace, their bodies at rest, and all they had to do was relax and enjoy each other's company.

This was where he wanted to stay for the rest of his life -- maybe not in this exact place, but here in Greg's heart, knowing that the man he loved was his in every way. And also knowing that he belonged to Greg in the same way, and that nothing would ever break that tie.

Cuddling with Greg made his soul sing, his heart expand. He'd never thought that he could love someone so much that he'd be completely comfortable with them in every way, enough to let all of his guards down. But with Greg, he felt at ease in every way.

Sitting up a little straighter, Ryan reached for his mug, knowing that the cocoa would have cooled enough by now to be drinkable. He handed Greg's mug to him first, waiting for his boyfriend to sit up, then raised it to his lips and took a sip. Ah, it was perfect, just the way he liked it.

And being here with Greg, just cuddling on the couch and being with the man he loved, was just the way he liked his life. He hoped that they would be this way for a long time to come; he didn't want anything to change. Their lives were as close to perfect as they were going to ever get.

Could their lives possibly get any better? Ryan didn't know the answer to that question, but he wasn't going to discount any possibilities. As he closed his eyes and cuddled closer to Greg, he knew that he had the sword and shield of his boyfriend's love held right here in his arms.

***