Title: The Apology
Author: Lora
Pairing: Cath/Sara & past Cath/Gil
Series: 1) The Betrayal
Challenge: Seinfeld Episodes
Summary: Again... it's all in the title
Rating: NC-17

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Catherine stood in the doorway to their bedroom, mascara stains on her cheeks. She didn't know what else to say, her words and emotions had been spilled at Sara's feet but nothing she said or did could make up for her latest betrayal.


Time and time again she had let Sara down, cheated on her with random men she hardly even knew...and now Grissom. She had no explanations for why she felt the need to wake up in somebody else's arms when the only person she had ever truly loved was waiting at home for her.


The others, Sara had forgiven, they meant nothing to Catherine and she loved her too much to let go. But this time it was different. This time it was personal. This time, it was Gil Grissom.


Sara knew that Catherine had loved Gil once, that's why she couldn't let this one go.


"Sara..."


No response.


"Sara, please you have to talk to me."


"I don't have to say shit to you Catherine. Please leave."


Catherine wept silently.


"I can't tell you how sorry I am... Let me make it up to you..."


"Oh yeah, and how are you going to do that?"


Catherine sat on the edge of the bed and traced Sara's calf with her fingernails.


"You know how."


She crawled slowly towards Sara, watching for any sign that the other woman might push her away. She didn't and Catherine sighed inwardly.


.......


Sara moaned as she came, giving herself a moment to breathe before pushing Catherine backwards and holding her hands above her head tightly. She straddled the blonde, reaching behind her with her free hand and pushing two fingers roughly inside Catherine. The blonde arched and held her breath at the forcefulness but then moaned deeply as Sara fucked her harder than ever before.


"You always know how to fuck me Ms. Sidle."


"Mmhmmm." Sara nodded, twisting her fingers expertly, making Catherine squirm beneath her.


"You're the hardest, best fuck I've ever had..."


"You got that right Catherine, I'll be the best you ever had..."


Catherine screamed as Sara's finger's found the spot and released the waves of orgasm.


Sara smiled as Catherine bucked beneath her, hands still held tightly above her head.


"I fucking love you..." Catherine panted, barely catching her breath.


"No, Catherine. You love the way I fuck you. But let me tell you, that was the last time. I'm tired of being your fuck toy and watching you give yourself away to perverts every time you think my eyes are closed."


Catherine stared in shock at Sara. She thought this was the makeup sex not break-up sex.


"My eyes are never closed Cath. Never. I see you, I see the way they look at you, the way you flirt with them. But you never see me. You're always too busy being an over-used fucking sex toy to notice I even exist."


Catherine slapped her hard and regretted it as soon as her hand left her face. She knew everything she was hearing was true.


Sara pushed Catherine off the bed and held the broken tears inside.


"Just get out of my house." she whispered, her voice lost.


Catherine pulled on her clothes and picked up her bags which were already waiting in the doorway from earlier that evening. She turned and looked deep into Sara's eyes, choking back tears as saw the emptiness and anguish there.


"I'm sorry and whatever you might believe, I have and always will love you more than anything else in this world. I never set out to hurt you, please if you remember nothing else, just remember that."


As she heard the front door slam, Sara broke down on the bed. Curling her fingers tightly around the bed sheets she sobbed, Catherine's perfume lingered and she wanted so badly to kiss her soft neck right now.


Catherine was gone, and Sara knew that without her, she was empty, broken and alone.


She grabbed the phone and punched in Cath's number.


"What?"


"Where are you?"


"I'm about three blocks away."


"Can you turn round and come back?"


"What the... yeah, but why?"


"Because they always say that the best sex is always the making up sex...."


"Does this mean you accept my apology?"


"No more apologies, no more fights, no more goodbyes... just us, just me and you. Forget about what's happened, we can leave that in the past and start a fresh page. What do you say? I can't do this alone, I need you Catherine, I need you here with me."


"I'll be there in two minutes."


As they lay entwined in each other's arms, Catherine gently kissed Sara's collarbone.


"Oh and Sara..."


"Mmm?"


"I do see you. Always. I see your heart, your beautiful face and body, I see how smart and amazing, kind and trusting you are, I see all the love and understanding you show me. But I've always been too afraid to tell you, because if I told you how much I loved you, I would be opening myself up to rejection and hurt."


"I would never hurt you Catherine and you know that."


"Yeah, but it's just with everything that happened with Eddie, he burned me real bad Sara. That's why I find it so hard to settle down now."


"I know, but I'm not Eddie, Catherine, remember that."


"I know, I know... you're way better looking."


They giggled.


"And I'm ten times better at fucking you than he was."


"Can't argue with that." Catherine giggled again as Sara dove under the sheets, the flick of her tongue signalling the start of what would be the best making up sex each of them had ever had.


END

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