Previous part of The Odyssey.

***

"How's Riley getting on?"
 
"Good.  She's...steadfast, reliable.  Not given to emotional attachments.  I should talk."
 
"What do you mean?"
 
"Haven't you heard?  I thought Ray would have told Catherine and she would have told you...maybe not...maybe I thought Ray would've told you."
 
"Tell me what?"  Gil was impatient.
 
"About Hayley."
 
"Hayley?  Are you going to tell me then?"
 
"You haven't heard?"
 
"No.  God, Nick this is worse than pulling teeth."
 
"Sorry.  There was this case...while you were way...it got to me...the poor girl was murdered by her mother; she turned out to be her adoptive mother.  It was ALL so preventable and I was...well I was upset and I cried in the locker room and Ray found me.  He was good.   I was a wreck."
 
"I'm sorry Nick...not being here..."
 
Nick laughed, not a pleasant sound but a bitter, incredulous guffaw.  "And how, exactly, would you have helped me?  With your sensitive skills in staff management?"
 
Gil was silent.  Nick was right, what would he have done...said, 'it's over'.  He had no right to sit here offering false succour.
 
"You're right, I'm very sorry.  It seems my failings continue unabated."
 
"No, I'm sorry.  You were trying to be friendly and I was uncharitable.  You can't help being..."
 
"...useless?"
 
"You're not useless."  This time Nick laughed properly.  "You can't help that you don't know what to do...no one knows everything and let's face it you do know a lot about a lot of other things."
 
"Now you're being generous."
 
"No, you're the generous one."
 
"I wish I was; I really wish I could say that it was my idea to do all this but it wasn't, it isn't..."
 
"What?"  Nick momentarily lost concentration and the truck veered across the road earning him a loud horn blast from another motorist.  He quickly righted the truck but pulled over onto a vacant lot.
 
"What the fuck do you mean?"
 
"I didn't mean to just tell you like that, please, Nick, it isn't like that..."
 
"...what do you mean...tell me?"
 
"Well, when I got home from your house after I told you about Greece...and all that, I was very angry, with myself, and I e-mailed Nik in Australia.  He said I'd given up too easily and that I must woo you with lots of presents and that if you were gay you'd like that...you see I'm new to the gay...as Nik says, and he was helping me...you do know how useless I am?" 
 
Gil was despondent for carelessly blurting out the truth; he was always going to tell Nick but when the time was right...and now wasn't the right time, evidently.  He was right to imagine he'd balls it all up; it had all gone far too smoothly.
 
"I thought it was all too good to be true; I should have known you couldn't change.  Did he tell you what to buy me too?"
 
"No. He said flowers, a plant to start off with...expensive, but everything else was my idea Nick, honestly."
 
"Honestly?  Do you actually know what that word means?" Nick sounded defeated.  "I should have known better than to think the great Gil Grissom could do something nice for me of his own volition.  I'll return the gifts, don't send me any more."?
 
"Please don't, Nick, please."  Gil was reduced to pleading with Nick, how had it all gone so wrong, so quickly?
 
"No, they were sent under false pretences...all you want to do is get in my pants."
 
"NO!  That isn't true; I want to be your friend, Nick. I really do want to be your friend."
 
"No; you're my boss, you'll never be my friend, or anything else."
 
Gil looked at the stricken face of Nick Stokes, probably mirroring his own for despair, and then he did the only thing he could think off.  He released his seat belt, opened the passenger door and jumped out of the truck.
 
"Tell 'em I quit."  Gil shouted and then slammed the door shut with such force the truck rocked.  He looked around to get his bearings and then started walking away from the truck towards his house, although it was some miles away.
 
Nick watched Gil walk away from the truck with his mouth hanging open.  He hadn't expected that.  Gil Grissom wasn't one for grand entrances and exits; he never had been.  Nick must have watched Gil walk about a hundred yards before he was spurred into action.
 
He too, jumped out of the truck, locked up, and ran after Grissom. 
 
"Grissom.  Stop; stop."  But he paid no attention to Nick, just kept walking.
 
"Grissom.  Stop."  There was no response.
 
"For Chrissakes, Gil, stop behaving like a spoilt brat."  That was all Nick could think of to say.
 
Gil stopped though, and looked at Nick.  "I was never a spoilt brat, precocious maybe, spoilt never.  You said it yourself Nick, I treated you like shit.  All I wanted to do was make amends.  I have no skills to enable me to understand what I needed to do, so I accepted some advice, I didn't ask for advice I was just told what I should do. 
 
"Send the gifts to Goodwill; I don't want to see them, or you, ever again; all I've ever done is undermine you and ignore your problems.  I thought I could change, but evidently it's too late for that.  You deserve better and I was being ridiculous to imagine I could win your friendship, let alone anything else.  I'll send in my resignation by letter.  Tell them what you like."
 
"Gil, don't do this, don't do something that you'll regret.  I was wrong to say those things to..."
 
"...no, you weren't, you were right.  I acted fraudulently and you caught me out.  Ludicrous to think I investigate criminals when I'm the most dishonest person, I know.  Nick...just get on with your life."
 
"No; if you leave, then so will I."  Nick was only half bluffing.
 
"You can't do that, not now, with your promotion."
 
"What promotion?"
 
"It's secret, I'm not supposed to say anything...it's not a foregone conclusion, not yet."
 
"Okay...but you've let the cat out of the bag, so come on..."
 
"No, I can't, I've already broken Ecklie's confidence in telling you."
 
It didn't occur to either man that their argument seemed to be over, but Nick suddenly laughed.
 
"Hey, you're really gay!"
 
"I know.  What do you mean?"
 
"Man, flouncing out like that...real gay, no doubt about it."
 
"Really?"
 
"Yeah, now come on get back in the truck.  That was our first argument."
 
"It was?  I'm not very good at arguing...never had any terms of reference, my parents didn't...it's hard to argue when you're deaf."
 
"Didn't you argue with Sara?"
 
"No.  We just didn't talk.  We didn't talk much anyway."
 
"That figures."
 
"What do you mean by that?"
 
"Well, you don't argue very well, I mean running off and giving up the fight before it's begun, man, looks like this other Nik, and me, really have got our work cut out."
 
"You're not mad now?"
 
"Nah...I wouldn't have sent your gifts back anyway...they're much too good."
 
"I did choose them myself.  There were things I liked and hoped you would too."
 
"Yeah, that's good.  So what else did he tell you to do?"
 
"Not to accept your rejections for at least twenty five times..."  Nick whistled his amazement.  "...and to make sure you knew that I thought you were...sex on legs."
 
"Sex on legs?  You think that?"
 
"Yes...and so much more..."
 
"There you are...you managed that all by yourself and it was good."
 
"Which bit?'  Gil was genuinely confused.
 
"God; the so much more bit.  Nik isn't here to tell you to say it, so you can manage on your own."
 
"That's good then.  Did you mean that kiss...does it still stand?"
 
"You bet."  They were still standing about two hundred yards from the truck when Gil's cell rang. 
 
"Grissom.  Yeah, we stopped...okay, we'll take it." He ended the call.  "Yet another shooting in Henderson...shall we go?"
 
"You're not quitting?"
 
"Not tonight."
 
"So what's with this promotion?"
 
"It's not final; Ecklie's got to get backing and the money for his plan - it's pretty ambitious - but I think he's likely to get both.  Look if it doesn't come off and I've told you you'll be disappointed."
 
"I suppose so; but it's nice to be considered for a supervisor's position."
 
"Nicky, it's more than that."
 
"You called me Nicky."
 
"I'm sorry I know you don't like it..."
 
"I like you calling me Nicky; you mean it in a nice way."
 
"I do?  I do."  He smirked.
 
"Not a supervisor?  What then?  This is intriguing."  He laughed.
 
"Promise me that if it doesn't come off you won't be too disappointed and if it comes off you'll be very surprised when Ecklie tells you?"
 
"I promise."
 
"Since his promotion he's still had to do the AD work for the lab.  They won't appoint another AD but what he wants is another tier above the supervisors, in overall charge of them and then another person taking charge of ongoing training issues..."
 
"...that's got to be you."
 
"It is; but the other post is what he wants you to do."
 
"You're joking me?"
 
"No, he was sufficiently impressed with you doing that stint of acting supervisor that he thinks you have the clout, both technically and more importantly for him, politically, to do the job."
 
"Wow."
 
"Exactly."
 
"Hold on though, this'll mean a desk bound job."
 
"That's what I said; he said that there would be a fair bit of admin duties, but what he wanted was for you and me to work closely together on the big cases, make sure every angle was covered, so you'd still be doing CSI work alongside me.  Could you do that?"
 
"You bet.  Got to give it to Ecklie, it sounds like a plan."  He laughed.
 
"I will be under strict instructions not to speak to the press; that would be your jurisdiction."
 
"I can believe that.  But what if we are...you know, together?"
 
Gil perked up and grinned.  "You think that's a possibility, then?"
 
"Don't you?"
 
"God, in my wildest dreams, yes."
 
"No need to call me, God, just yet."
 
"Nick.  You won't be too disappointed if it doesn't happen will you?"
 
"Us?"
 
"No...this job."
 
"Nah, it's good to know that at least I've been considered good enough to do the job.  But, what about the supervisors...if it does come off there'll be some sour grapes.  Wow, Catherine will have a fit."
 
"One of the reasons for making her a supervisor now."
 
"It's likely to come off then?"
 
"I don't know; honestly."
 
"Hey, about you being 'dishonest'; I didn't mean it; it was just an argument, man.  I bet we're going to have a few more before we grow old."
 
"I like that idea..."
 
"...arguing?"
 
"...growing old...together."
 
By this time they'd walked back to the truck and Nick was easing it back into the traffic. 
 
"Let's take this a day at a time...eh, Gil?"
 
"Gil?"
 
"I've thought of you as 'Gil' since you sent me the little Buddha; I loved it by the way."
 
"Me too, it's actually one of a pair and I kept the other one, in the hope that they might be together some day."
 
"I think you do romantic just fine, you know."
 
"You do?  I want you, Nick.  I want you more than I've ever wanted anyone or anything in my life."
 
Nick was silent.  Gil thought he might have gone too far...again.
 
"Nick, I'm sorry, I didn't mean to..."
 
"...don't be; it's good, real good."  Gil realised that Nick was choked up and so he reached over and laid his hand on Nick's leg.  A soothing gesture; he thought he was learning fast.  Nick laid his hand on top of Gil's - just for a few moments.

***

The next gift arrived in just an envelope.  Riley was convinced it was the beginning of the end.  Unusually Greg didn't offer his thoughts on the content of the letter and gave every indication of having lost interest.
 
It was a letter.
 
'Nick
 
I do have more gifts for you, I promise, but for this gift would you please join me for dinner before work on Wednesday?  I have booked a table for 7pm at 'Pearl', the Asian grill at the MGM. I have always enjoyed their food and I feel sure you will, if you haven't already.
 
I know we have to go to work afterwards, but I thought it would give us a chance to talk and for you to give me some more lessons on how to go about all of this.
 
I could also personally deliver your next gift ' not having it delivered to work would give the shift some idle gossip!
 
I do want you.  I hope you can come to want me.
 
Gil xx'
 
Nick teared up as he read the note.  Of course he wanted Gil, how could he not?
 
But, Gil had made a mistake, or at the very least an oversight that he should have foreseen.
 
Greg had decided to have what he thought was a little fun; to get to work early and hang around reception to see who delivered the gifts and then interrogate them about the sender.
 
He was successful in catching the delivery man of the envelope and followed him outside after he'd made his drop.
 
So who had sent him?  And Greg got really lucky.  The man said that normally he didn't know who the sender was as the office just sent him out o with the package, but this time there'd been a last minute change, and the sender had visited the office to change the gift intended for tonight, to just the envelope.
 
And the description of the sender? 
 
-A man; looked to be in his late forties or early fifties, white wavy hair and a very good tan.  Oh, and he was bandy legged, real bandy legged.'
 
Greg was dumbstruck; he slipped the guy a twenty and went back into the lab to contemplate his new found knowledge.  He wasn't particularly happy to know what he now knew, and he would certainly keep it to himself.  There was obviously something much bigger going on than he'd imagined.  He'd bide his time to investigate further.
 
He'd keep a look out with Nick and Gil to see if he could see...anything.
 
On Wednesday evening Gil and Nick had agreed to arrive separately at Pearl, since they had to go straight to work after they'd eaten.  They were still casually dressed, but a little more smartly than they normally dressed for work.
 
Gil was already seated when Nick arrived.  He stood as Nick was shown to the table and placed a hand on his arm in a welcoming gesture.
 
"I've been looking forward to this since I wrote the note."
 
"Me too, I have been here before and I love their shrimp dishes."
 
"I'd be hard pressed to decide which dish I like best, I've been working my way through the menu.  And no, I never came here with Sara, she didn't like the place, I think she used to come with that paramedic...Hank?"
 
"Yeah, Hank."
 
They settled down at their table and started to look through the menu, but Nick was smiling and kept glancing at Gil.
 
"What?  Have I missed something?"
 
"This is our first date."
 
"It is?  Yes, I suppose it must be, we should have a drink to our first date...one glass of wine won't hurt.  I wonder if they do champagne by the glass."
 
Nick continued to smile, almost laugh at Gil.
 
"What?  What's the matter?"  Gil was starting to laugh back even though he had no idea why.
 
"You.  If I could have guessed who might be gay at work I would never, never, have considered you.  You seem as straight as they come, but then the truck incident the other night keeps making me chuckle at odd times, when I remember."
 
"The truck incident.  I can tell you Nick Stokes, that it was no bluff, I was as pissed as I could ever remember being...at myself.  My sheer incompetence at dealing with intimacy is...is..."
 
"...dazzling?"
 
"Dazzling?  That seems like a very gay word, so it might very well apply."  He laughed.
 
"It does, but don't be so hard on yourself, I said some very unkind things, do you know why?"
 
"No, why?"
 
"Nik...this guy in Australia: jealousy.  I'm jealous of the time you had with him.  It should have been me."
 
Gil was momentarily dumbstruck and then he smiled and took a deep breath.  "It undoubtedly should have been you, Nick, except for one inexorable problem.   I really didn't have any idea that I was gay.  No idea at all.  It was very funny, in retrospect, and Nik and I did laugh about it.  One minute I'm a straight guy on a beach with a friend and the next minute...and I do mean the very next minute...I'm indulging in mutual masturbation with the guy.  That's some speedy conversion, don't you think?
 
"But it all seemed so right, I can't really explain it; it's like I've been reading without my reading glasses and I put them on and everything on the page is suddenly clear.
 
Nick smiled his big smile at Gil and then laughed.  "We'd better order."  The waiter was hovering.  They did do champagne by the glass so they toasted each other.
 
"To us."
 
"To us, Gil, and the future?"
 
"That would be good; I'll try not to fuck it all up."  He dropped his voice to whisper the profanity.
 
"You and me both.  So tell me more about it all."
 
"There's not much to say.  Nik and I got on very well, he termed us a holiday romance; no regrets, no looking back.  He was badly hurt by a long standing partner.  He wanted to have a little fun.
 
"Do you know I could be married now?  After Sara's kidnap, I proposed to her and we were going to marry.  Although, in truth, we made no plans.  I think I've spoken more to you tonight, in one go, than I ever did with Sara, we were just so unsuitable and yet I was willing to be with her just to be with...someone.  Now that makes it seem as if I was lonely and yet I didn't think I was.  In retrospect I was just missing something; that I was a homosexual and that it was actually you who was the one...the one I wanted.  Does that make sense?"
 
"Not much. I don't know how you didn't know about men.  I was very sure...as soon as I hit puberty.  Of course my family and my Texan life meant that I was firmly undercover...closeted."
 
"But you've remained so, even here in Vegas?  I never heard a whisper or had any...suspicion...if that's the right word."
 
"Old habits die hard.  I meant to become more open when I came here, but I couldn't, I was very firmly entrenched in the subterfuge, so I stayed put.  But you would be very surprised just how many men...and women, live their lives like that.  There is a strong scene of closeted gays; you just need to find out where to go, how to meet up.  I've had several long term relationships and many other short...for want of a better word, I've never been into one night stands...and before you ask, I've been very careful and I'm regularly tested."
 
"I never gave that a thought, although Nik was always very careful and...does swallowing the first time you fellate someone qualify for careful?  Probably not."
 
Nick very nearly spluttered the drink he'd just sipped.  "No, it wouldn't!  The first time?"
 
"Yes; particularly gay wouldn't you say?"
 
"Yes; it took me quite a few goes to swallow."
 
"I think, no, I'm sure Nik was clean, and Henri, but I think I'd better get tested hadn't I...it never occurred to me."
 
"Yeah, man; I would prefer it."
 
"That sounds promising."
 
"Let's stop being coy here, Gil.  You want me and I want you...we are going to get to do the deed sometime soon."
 
"You want me?  That's the first time you've said as much."
 
"Do you know, I think you are a bit strange, Gil; this has been a forgone conclusion since you visited my house.  If you didn't realise it, even after your other Nik said, you are missing something."
 
"That's my whole point, Nick!  I'm oblivious.  I lived with a woman I didn't love and would have married her and stayed with her, more than likely.  I wanted you all these years and didn't know until I was on a beach in Greece.  Which brings me to the way I've treated you; I think I mistook my feelings for a kind of fatherly love and that in turn irritated me because I didn't want to father you...I wanted to fuck you, but I didn't know.  I think you're perfectly entitled to say I'm strange.  In the circumstances I think you're being generous.  Nik is all those miles away, on another continent even, and he picked up in an e-mail, the lay of the land.
 
"I do have one question though.  Why did you act so...vanilla, when we had to investigate areas with which you must have been familiar but you pretended not to be?"
 
"Vanilla!  You even have the vocabulary.  It's obvious; mostly I was petrified of meeting someone I knew and that I would be exposed.  Obviously I never did, because my set were...are, deeply closeted."
 
"Will you remain that way?"
 
"Now that is an interesting question, because I have gradually begun to emerge from the shadows.  I've been going to an openly gay club for a couple of months now and have actually met a couple of cops there.  I'm getting near forty and I need to make some sort of statement about my life...of course, the big obstacle could be my parents..."
 
"They don't know?"  Gil was astounded.
 
Nick laughed.  "Don't be ridiculous, Texan bible bashing republicans with a gay son?  I don't think so.  Although to be fair to them, I think they would accept me, as long as no one else knew, and I stayed here."  Nick laughed again, but it was that bitter sound that Gil had heard before very recently.
 
"I'm sorry.  I've thought about my parents too...I'm sure my Mom wouldn't have cared less.  My father, I don't know...I only have a child's perspective of him since he died when I was nine.  What about work?"
 
"You've actually helped there because I thought with all the gifts I could just bring it up in conversation that it's a man sending them and that I'm quite happy about that.  But...Ecklie, I don't want to queer ' excuse the pun ' the pitch if this new job is up for grabs.  That would be suicidal for both of us...and I'm nothing if not a realist.  Do you know that if Catherine knew and then I was offered this job...I don't trust her that much...I'm sorry, I know you're friends, but it's the way it is, especially after my success when she was off sick."
 
Gil nodded.  "I know what you mean.  She has changed...or maybe I have, but we don't have the friendship we once had and it was most probably my fault.  My secrecy over Sara.  It would have to be the same secrecy with you, then?"
 
"Yes, it would, can you live with that?"
 
"Yes.  You?"
 
"Yes.  I have done anyway...for a long time."
 
Gil lifted his glass with just a little champagne remaining and held it towards to Nick, and smiled.  "To us, once more."
 
Nick smiled back, an open smile that reached his eyes.  They understood each other.  They'd actually reached the same page of the book.  He lifted his glass and they both finished their champagne.
 
"I do have one more question.  A personal one, is that okay?"
 
"Go on."
 
"You said you still see your therapist...is that because of problems with your father and then me?"
 
"Ah.  A bit of a white lie I'm afraid.  I did have therapy for about a year after Gordon fucked me over and some of it was about Dad...I don't recall speaking about you, in derogatory terms anyway... but when I said I still see him...I do...we go to the same gym."
 
Gil laughed and Nick grinned and then their food arrived.
 
They feasted on the tastes and textures of the exotic food.  Finding that they shared the same likes and dislikes about the food only seemed to be fitting for their new found status.
 
When the meal had finished Gil reached into his pocket and presented the familiar envelope to Nick.
 
"It'll drive them mad not to have a delivery."
 
"I know.  I hope you feel okay about these, bearing in mind what you've just said."
 
Nick opened the envelope and found two tickets for the Elton John 'Red Piano' show at The Forum.
 
"This show is finishing and I'd hoped to get to see it, but it was sold out."
 
"I have contacts."
 
"Evidently.  Look two guys from work going to a show...is just that...two guys going to a show.  We keep a low profile...and we're both used to that; they can speculate but they won't know."
 
"It's a deal."
 
"Yes, it is."
 
"I've found it easier to talk to you tonight than anyone, ever before.  I think that must mean something."
 
"It means, Dr Grissom, that I'm very good indeed at making witnesses and perps talk."
 
"Which am I?"
 
"I don't know yet...give me time.  You know this Nik, are you going to meet up with him sometime?"
 
"We hadn't planned to, why?"
 
"I think I'd probably like the guy.  We appear to be on the same wavelength."
 
"Yes, you share the looks and the name, but that's no real reason for you to be alike, and yet I think you are."
 
"Is he better looking than me?"
 
"I might be vanilla, but I'm not criminally insane.  No, he's not.  You are by far the most handsome man I've ever known."
 
"Right answer.  You catch on quick."
 
"I hope so; I've got a lot of catching up to do!"
 
"You got that right."

***

If Greg was preparing for a long wait to gather evidence about Gil and Nick, he was wrong.  A smiling Nick dressed much smarter than usual came into the locker room.
 
"Hey G.  You're early."
 
"Not by much; traffic was light."
 
"Yeah, now you mention it."
 
"What's with the look?  All your jeans need washing?"
 
"Yeah, something like that."  Nick thought that Greg was fishing; he knew something
 
Greg thought it would be a good idea to go and find Gil Grissom and see how he was dressed.  He walked out into the hallway and there was the great man himself, talking to Hodges.  Smart.  Much smarter than usual, although he had bought himself a whole new wardrobe of clothes for work.  But he was wearing a button down shirt, without a tie, and he had never seen Grissom in a light blue shirt at work before.  Ever.  Actually, that was ever, regardless of work.
 
Greg was smug because he was positive no one would notice that both men were unusually well dressed and then make a connection between them.
 
"Hey, Gil, you look good, pale blue and that tan; a good look."
 
"Thank you, Catherine.  I've had to buy new clothes for work...weight loss."  He smiled at her very smugly in Greg's estimation; and okay, so Greg had miscalculated one half of the puzzle, but would Catherine, or anyone else, remark to Nick about his clothes?
 
"Nice shirt, Nick, is that silk?"
 
"Silk?  I don't think so.  Synthetic."
 
So Riley had noticed about Nick.  Greg was feeling hard done by; given that he knew what he knew.
 
No one appeared to link the two men together, so Greg kept his observations to himself.
 
Just as they were leaving the briefing room after assignments, Riley suddenly stopped in her tracks and addressed Nick.  "Your present, your gift?  Where is it?"
 
"It's obviously all over."  Catherine hoped.
 
"I had a special delivery today."
 
"Really?  What happened?"  Riley was eager for details.
 
"It was a personal delivery...and before you start, that's all I'm saying.  Ray, you coming?
 
"Certainly Nick.  If I do find out anything more I will share, don't worry, Riley."
 
"You won't find out anything, Ray, because you're too polite to ask."
 
"There is that, yes."  Ray chuckled at Riley's aggravation.  "But maybe Nick will share."
 
Ray continued to chuckle and Nick laughed.  "Like that's going to happen."
 
Nick did think, in passing, that Greg had been unusually quiet on the subject when he was normally the most vocal.  He knew...
 
Greg had been studying Grissom throughout the exchange.  But to no avail, if Grissom was involved, he showed no sign at all.
 
The next morning Nick called Gil, at home.
 
"Hey.  In bed yet?"
 
"No, reading a journal and enjoying a beer."
 
"That meal was good."
 
"I thought so.  Nick?"
 
"Yeah?"
 
"What's wrong?"
 
"Do you think Greg suspects?"
 
"I've no idea.  Why should he?"
 
"No real reason, just a feeling, you know, a gut feeling."
 
"Often a good enough reason."
 
"Hello?  You're agreeing with a gut feeling?  What happened to evidence?"
 
"Evidence is for work.  Feelings are altogether different, and gut feelings, when it's your gut, should be taken seriously."  Gil thought that that was a good answer.  Nick laughed and Gil's stomach flipped over at the happy sound.
 
"Nick?"
 
"Yeah?"
 
"Nothing."  He wasn't brave enough to invite Nick ro his house.
 
"Nothing?  Gil Grissom has nothing to say?  Is that a first?"
 
"Yes."
 
"Gil?  You want me to come over?"
 
The line was silent.
 
"Gil?"
 
"Yes, Nick.  I would love for you to come over."
 
"'K. Be there in twenty."
 
"Okay.  Yes."  The line went dead.
 
Gil sat for a few moments and then had a panic attack.  Was his place clean?  Nick's had been immaculate when he'd visited.  Did his bathroom need a scrub?  Was the living room tidy?  Did his bed linen need changing?
 
He stopped mid-tidying of his journals.
 
Bed. 
 
Was that really why Nick was coming over?  He took a few deep breaths.  Shower.  He'd shower.  Yes, that's what he would do.  He would shower, when he could move.  Gil stood still with several journals in his hands.  Nick Stokes was driving over to see him.  Now.  Now.
 
He suddenly rediscovered movement and dumped the journals back on the coffee table.  He dashed to his bathroom and undressed and dived under freezing water.  He took a quick shower.  He didn't want to miss Nick's arrival.  He dried himself and then put clean towels out and found himself a clean boxers, tee and jeans.
 
Back in the living room, he looked around and the place was actually as good as it got.  He checked his fridge, there were enough beers.  He smoothed down his damp hair and stopped with his hands resting on his head.
 
Nick Stokes was driving over to see him.     
 
It might not be for the reason Gil thought.  Perhaps Nick had had second thoughts.  Gil knew he shouldn't have told him about the job, broken Ecklie's confidence; maybe Nick had got cold feet.  The job might mean more to him than he'd said and he didn't want to...want to...queer the pitch.
 
But Nick had sounded sexy on the phone.  Nick always sounded sexy to him though, definitely since his return from Greece.  Jesus Christ, there was no fool like an old fool.
 
There was a knock at the door and Gil stood still...contemplating not answering.  It was Nick; could he face him?

***

Gil took a huge breath and made his way to the door and opened up.
 
"You took your time, I was expecting to be dragged in and accosted...assaulted even."  Nick pushed Gil back against the wall, as he'd done on his last visit.  He pushed the door shut and then stood up against Gil but pulled back and frowned.
 
"What's wrong?  There's something wrong."
 
"I thought..."
 
"You thought?"
 
"You were coming to end it.  I was utterly convinced that you wanted to end it."
 
"I obviously need to work on my telephone technique.  I was going for sexy!"
 
"You were sexy.  Very sexy.  You're always sexy."
 
"That's what I like to hear.  Come on, you need to sit down and recover."
 
"Sorry.  I worked myself up into a funk in a matter of moments."
 
"I forgive you.  You're vanilla."  He laughed but Gil didn't.
 
They sat on Gil's couch and Nick put an arm around Gil's shoulders and drew him to him.
 
"It's early days, Gil.  You don't know me...only work me.  But I'm straightforward.  I like to think that I am, anyway.  No hidden agenda, no nasty secrets, no reason to lie, or be deceitful.  It's the way I am.  Now, I know you kept quiet about Sara, but, apart from that I would think you're pretty much the same."
 
"I like to think that.  Nick?"
 
"Yeah?"
 
"Will you kiss me, please, now?"
 
"Recovered then?"
 
"Yes.  Completely."  Although he thought he must be the stupidest, dumb-assed jackass in the US.  
 
Moments later Nick's mouth was kissing Gil's mouth with passion and fervour.  Beneath Nick's lips, Gil was smiling.  Gil's arms circled Nick's neck and pulled him close as they kissed and licked and duelled with their tongues.
 
Nick's one arm remained around Gil's shoulders, but his other hand touched and inflamed Gil, rubbing up his side over his tee and with each rub the tee moved up and exposed Gil's flesh.  When Nick's hand touched Gil's flesh, he jumped.
 
"Ticklish?"
 
"No.  Desperate."
 
Nick grinned and began rubbing the flesh with his finger tips and Gil started gasping and shuddering at the touch.  Nick latched onto his mouth again but it wasn't many moments before Gil pulled back, gasping.
 
"I can't breathe, you're all consuming Nick; I'm drowning in you."
 
"Drowning in me?  You don't like it?"
 
"YES!  I do...it's the best I've ever..."
 
Nick silenced him with another kiss and more fingertips along his side and his ribcage and then fleetingly over one nipple.  Gil pushed Nick's head away from him so he could look at Nick and gasp in some much needed air.  But he was smiling...he could have been grimacing given his lack of oxygen, but what the hell.
 
Nick was panting too, but wanted to kiss again and Gil couldn't, in all honesty, stop him.
 
Nick's hand wondered downwards and was rubbing Gil's thigh on the outside but with each rub moved around to the inside of the leg and in moments Gil was squirming and wriggling  as Nick's hand rubbed closer and closer to Gil's crotch.  Then it was between his legs and Gil let them they fall open, wantonly, to allow Nick any access he wanted.
 
Nick pulled away from Gil's lips and he tucked his head into Gil's neck.  Gil could feel Nick's teeth biting him, and pulling the skin between his teeth. It wasn't painful, it was physically exhilarating.
 
And then Nick's fingers, or, maybe it was his thumb, or both, were pushing at his balls through the fabric of his jeans.  Gil was gasping and for a split second thought he might faint, but it was the oxygen deprivation, he seriously needed more intake, but couldn't, for one moment, contemplate calling a halt to these proceedings...
 
"You're not concentrating are you?"
 
"I am.  You are wonderful, Nick. Nicky.  I've never felt this way before and we're only making out of the couch."
 
"Only making out?  I'm doing my best here!"
 
Gil chuckled.  "I know you are, and it is the best, Nicky.  To have you, when I never dreamed I would...I have no words..."
 
"...seems to me you got plenty to say.  Look Gil, quit talking, and let's got hot and heavy.  Okay?" 
 
"Whatever you say.  Nick?"
 
"Gil?"  Nick laughed.
 
"Should we move this to the bedroom?  It would be more comfortable..."
 
"Now that was worth saying.  Have you been tested yet?"
 
"Yes, but I haven't had the results back."
 
"Okay, so we have some boundaries."
 
"I'm sorry."
 
"Don't be.  We can do a lot of stuff and I have condoms."  He wiggled his eyebrows and Gil laughed.
 
"I love you." Gil just couldn't help but blurt it out.
 
"Do you?  You sound certain."  Nick smiled at him.
 
"I am.  I think I've always loved you, but I know I've loved you since a beach in Tenos."
 
"In the arms of another man, if I'm not mistaken."
 
"Sorry.  Tactless of me."
 
"I'm in a forgiving mood.  Come on, let's christen your bed."
 
By the time they'd made it into the bedroom Gil had pulled off his tee and undone his jeans and was sliding them down his legs as he reached his bedside.  Nick had pulled his sweatshirt over his head and he'd unbuckled his own jeans and then pushed his jeans and his briefs down his legs bending over to untie his sneakers and prise them off his feet, followed by his socks.
 
Gil stood by the bed, suddenly a little bemused at the speed of it all.  His hard-on had abated a little, but still stuck out of the fly of his boxers.
 
Nick stood up straight, completely naked.
 
"God, Nick. You have a great body."
 
"Yeah, I know.  Come on."  He threw the comforter back and then flung himself onto the bed and bounced a little.  His cock doing a little bouncing of its own.
 
"Boxers.  Off."
 
Gil pushed them down and shook them off.  And stood there in all his naked glory.  He might not have the body, although at that moment he was very pleased he'd dropped some weight but he had a substantial erection and it was proudly displayed.
 
"Now get in this bed Gil Grissom and let's see what you're made of...and no talking."
 
"My lips are sealed...unless you want me to...because I do swallow you know."  He grinned as he kneeled on the bed and then fell forward into the arms of Nick Stokes.
 
There followed what can only be described as a scientific study of their bodies.  Both men intensely curious by nature, they explored every nook and cranny of the other's body.  What they liked, what they didn't, although, to be fair, neither man found anything they didn't like.
 
They stroked each other like they might be cats, they bit and sucked and licked.  Nick scratched the skin of Gil's ass.  He liked the ass; it was substantial enough for him to hang onto and Gil was very responsive to it being fondled.
 
But if Nick was fascinated by Gil's ass, Gil instantly fell in love with Nick's neat, toned cheeks.  They fit his hands perfectly and he kneaded the flesh and let his fingers move above Nick's opening.  Nick instinctively spread his legs for more, and Gil pulled back and fumbled for the lube that was somewhere beneath them on the bed.  When he found it, he squeezed a little onto his fingers and then went back to the puckered entrance.  He chuckled; even Nick's anus was neat and hairless.
 
Nick raised his eyebrows at Gil as he began to rub his lubed finger around and then slipped it in a little.  Nick gasped and Gil who'd been concentrating on the job in hand looked up at Nick.
 
"Okay?"
 
"More than..."
 
Gil had never done this before.  But he knew, very well, that if he could find the prostate he would give Nick a great deal of pleasure and more than anything in his world, at that moment, that's what he wanted to do.
 
He pressed another finger in and Nick was quite comfortable with the intrusion.  He pushed his fingers up further and suddenly felt the protuberance that he thought could well be the prostate.  He didn't need to check if it was or not, because Nick's ass and all those lovely muscles toned for Gil's personal use, clenched around his fingers and Nick emitted a sound like a howl, or maybe a growl, but Gil smirked at Nick, almost conspiratorially, and Nick grinned back.
 
"You...just got...lucky...is all."  Nick gasped out.
 
"Not at all...I'm a scientist.  Lie back and enjoy it."
 
"Yeah..."
 
Gil, having discovered the prize, made gentle stroking movements and Nick was writhing beneath him.  
 
Nick's hand came up and stroked Gil's unruly curls ' they'd been damp but had dried and were now curling in all directions.  Nick was fascinated by them.
 
"Now would be a good time to practise your swallowing skills."  They'd had erections for the better part of an hour and had unconsciously held back to be able to conduct the intimate search of each other.
 
"Nervous.  Not an expert."
 
"Do you think you'll fall at the last hurdle?  You won't, I'm sure."
 
And Gil went down on Nick.  He'd already licked and teethed Nick's penis and now he applied himself with renewed energy to the task.   It tasted like nothing he'd tasted before.  He only had Nik and Henri for comparative purposes and neither of them had tasted this sweet.  Musky and sweet.  It was said that semen tasted like what you ate, so Nick probably ate healthily and didn't drink too much.  Good living made the task pleasant.
 
Gil used his tongue, licking up and down the taut skin, around the rosy head and in the slit, and then under the foreskin.  He sucked on first one and then the other ball.  They, like everything about Nick fitted in with Gil.  In this case his mouth.  Nick was made for Gil.  Gil knew that now, as he practised his newest skill of fellatio.
 
He took the head into his mouth and sucked on it quite extravagantly.  He couldn't deep throat yet, but he was determined that was another skill he would learn for Nick's pleasure.  His sucking was creating a vacuum and then he was releasing it and starting again. 
 
Nick's ass was pulsating on Gil's fingers and Gil, now multitasking, (and feeling very proud of himself) stroked Nick's prostrate with two fingers and sucked his cock with his mouth.  He pulled his other hand from underneath Nick where it had been latched onto an ass cheek and with that hand rolled Nick's balls around and then caught hold of the bottom of Nick's erection, squeezing and then pumping in time to his sucking and Nick's breaths.
 
Gil listened as Nick made little gasping sounds that accompanied the fingers up his ass, his mouth sucking and his hand pumping. 
 
Perfectly synchronised.  This was the first time they'd ever laid hands on each other and they were as one.
 
Nick suddenly changed his gasping.  He lifted his head from the bed and the muscles straining in his neck he rasped out to Gil.
 
"I'm gonna...faster...faster..."
 
Gil immediately started sucking up and down faster, and for all his internal gloating a few moments ago, his rhythm was lost, but Nick didn't seem to care.  His hips were bucking up and his hands held onto Gil's head.
 
Gil made a conscious effort to think of Nick's prostate and pushed his fingers onto it and rubbed as hard as he could.
 
It had the desired effect.  Nick arched his back off the bed and he bucked up into Gil's mouth as stream after stream of fluid filled the mouth and Gil swallowed it and, almost gagging, he realised he'd also swallowed the head of Nick's penis.
 
Nick was howling; there was no other word to describe the noise he was making.  Not loud, but quite definitely animalistic noises.
 
Gil's erection had faded while he'd concentrated on bringing Nick off, but now he felt his own aching balls and tight skinned cock, desperate for some relief.
 
Nick lay back and his body relaxed.  Gil's fingers popped out of him with a plop.  He continued to lick Nick clean, because it seemed like the right thing to do.
 
"I can't move; so get up here and I'll suck you off, man."  Nick gave breathless instructions to Gil.
 
"Not tested, remember?"
 
"Come on..."
 
"No, Nick.  Not until I know."
 
Nick looked down at Gil kneeling between his legs.  "Put on a condom."
 
"No...may I...would you..."
 
Nick smiled.  "What do you want?"

***

"May I masturbate on you?"
 
"You may."  Nick laughed at Gil's polite request.  "I'd like that."
 
"I've never done it before, I just want to."
 
"So quit talking about it, and do it."  Nick's voice was thick and Texan and so sexy.
 
Gil moved in closer to Nick, still kneeling, and Nick wrapped his legs around Gil's waist.
 
"Feels good."
 
"You wanna talk?  Talk me through it!"
 
"Talk?  About it?"
 
"Yeah. Like phone sex, only you're here."
 
"I don't know..."
 
"Oh, I know you can.  Tell me what you feel."
 
"I feel tight, my...balls and cock, it'll be quick because I've wanted you for from the moment you walked through the door."
 
Gil was pumping his erection with his right hand and fondling his balls with his left hand.  Pulling them and rolling them around.  He was pumping slowly, but his fist was tight and as he got to the head he twisted his hand and gasped at the friction.
 
"You've gone quiet.  Makes a change."
 
"Don't be cruel.  I've never done this before."
 
"Sorry, not.  Come on, tell me."
 
"I'm so hard and so desperate to come but I don't want to, not straight away.  I want to think about you, with my fingers in you, and your cock in my mouth and the taste of you.  Sweet.  Coming in my mouth, me swallowing you...and your head just a little.  Feeling your hands on my head, your fingers spread out on my scalp.
 
Unknowingly, Gil was pumping faster and Nick was breathing heavily, watching Gil, and his hand, and his cock. 
 
"Nick, I'm coming.  I'm...going..."
 
And true to his word his semen launched itself from his cock in an arc over Nick's chest, in three large spurts and then a number of smaller spurts as his knees gave way and he sat back on his haunches. Taking in big breaths and trying to regain control.
 
"Hey."  Nick called to him and Gil looked up to see Nick fisting his own hard cock again.  Fast and furiously and then spurting a small amount of fluid at Gil's stomach.
 
"Just leftovers."  He gasped out.
 
"I've got nothing left."
 
"Can I sleep here?"
 
"Please.  Yes.  Don't go."
 
"Won't then."
 
Nick disentangled his legs from around Gil and pulled Gil sideways to him so that they were lying side by side.
 
"Not going to wash off.  Too tired."
 
"I'm with you."  And Gil pulled up the comforter and slid his arm over Nick's wet and sticky stomach.  He could not have been happier.
 
Nick snuggled down and put his arm over Gil's and held onto his hand.  Gil lifted his head a little and looked at him.  Nick was fast asleep; Gil dropped his head on the pillow and moments later, so was he. 
 
Hours later they were both awoken from sleep by Nick's cell ringing and vibrating on the floor beside the bed.  Nick leaned over the bed to retrieve his jeans and extract the cell from a pocket.
 
"Yeah?"  He drawled, sounding aggravated from being disturbed.
 
"Hello.   Yeah, I was asleep."
 
"That's okay."
 
"Tonight?"
 
"What have I done?"
 
"Nothing?"
 
"You sure?"
 
"Okay then, see you then...and you're sure?"
 
"Just checking."
 
"Bye."  Nick ended the call and turned and grinned at Gil.
 
"Was that Ecklie?"
 
"It was; wants to see me before shift tonight.  I'm not in trouble and did I act surprised?"
 
"You were very good.  I see now that you're capable of deception."
 
"I'm pleading the fifth.  Hey you!  Regrets?"
 
"God!  No!"
 
"You can call me, God, now."
 
"Okay.  You could be a Greek God...Adonis."
 
"There you go with the Greek connection again."
 
"Sorry.  Will you forgive me?"
 
"Yeah.  Did we really go to sleep without cleaning up?  That's gross."
 
"It is.  But, you know what?  I don't care.  Thank you, Nick."
 
"It was good; and you were good, man...not as vanilla as you'd have me believe."     
 
"You made it easy."
 
"You calling me easy?"
 
"I think I am."
 
"Well, in that case..."
 
They were interrupted by Gil's cell ringing, but from a way off...
 
"Ecklie.  Probably.  I'll leave it and pick it up later, I'm too busy now."
 
"I could die for a piss, man, but I think I need to put my morning wood to some use first."
 
"I've realised just how good you've become at decision making."
 
Nick didn't reply he was under the bedding sucking Gil.
 
"No, Nick, Nicky.  You can't, not yet."
 
"I forgot.  When do you get the results?"
 
"Tomorrow.  I can drop by and they'll give them to me."
 
"No counselling?"
 
"Counselling?"
 
"Well more reading the riot act about putting yourself in a position where you had unprotected sex and exposed yourself to God knows what?"
 
"I see.  They didn't say when they took the blood.  Said to pick up the envelope; that was all."
 
"Fair enough.  Maybe your white hair gave you some gravitas."
 
"Yeah, maybe."
 
"Go and see what Ecklie wanted, I wanna know."
 
"Issuing orders already?"
 
"Practising."
 
Gil heaved himself up from the bed and went in search of his cell; a few minutes later he ambled back to find the bed empty, but he could hear Nick having a piss...and he returned as Gil was listening to his message.
 
"Ecklie?"
 
Gil nodded and then pressed -call'.  "Conrad, it's Gil.  I got your message, I'll be in; does this mean you have the funding?"  Gil smiled at Nick.  "What about Nick?  Yes, yes, well good luck, I hope he accepts.  Yeah.  Bye."
 
"Wow!  He's going to offer me the job?"
 
"Yes, he is.  They accepted his plan in its entirety.  He's feeling very elated about that, he'll think he has some clout.   I suppose he has.  They offered him McKeen's job without interview.  Like you and me, really.  I wonder how the other supervisors will take it."
 
"They'll have to put up and shut up.  We got business to do."
 
Gil looked at Nick with something bordering on alarm.
 
"What?  I've been thinking about the job.  I can do it.  And it's no secret that our team...on grave, are head and shoulders above the others when it comes to work.  That's not right is it?  Every victim should be entitled to the best, every time, regardless of the time of day.  I see the role as bringing everyone up to speed.  You training; me...directing operations.  It could work.  It could work big time."
 
"Yes, it could.  Are you going to discipline me, too?"
 
"Nah...as long as you don't step out of line."
 
Nick grinned at Gil's horror stricken expression.
 
"Maybe a cock-ring now and then?"
 
"Never worn one."
 
"Oh, man, you should've kept that to yourself!  Can I shower here; I'll have to go home for clean clothes, but..."
 
"...I was going to suggest that, I'll cook us a breakfast.  That okay?  I need to shower first though, before cooking."
 
"That'd be good.  How big's your shower?"
 
"Big enough; come on."
 
In the shower Nick insisted on washing Gil's hair.  "It's the curls man, I love the feel of them and your pubic hair is thick and curly too, man, I love it."
 
Gil laughed out loud under the water.  Was it only three weeks since he'd returned from Greece...from his vacation, his epiphany?  And here he was showering with Nick...NICK STOKES!
 
Nick used a dollop of shower gel to make both penises soapy, wet and hard and then leaned into Gil to jerk them both off together.  Gil put his hand on top of Nick's; he wouldn't be telling Nick that he'd done this with the other Nik...more than once; he really didn't need to mention Greece again.
 
Their orgasms were simultaneous.  Even under the hot water of the shower their semen was hot.  Gil gasped and fell into Nick.  Nick disentangled his hand and hugged Gil close to him.  Into his ear Nick growled.  "We're good together, Gris.  Gil.  We're good."
 
They managed to actually clean themselves off, although space was tight.  When they were towelling themselves dry Gil was thinking how natural all of this was.  How come he'd never imagined another man in his fantasies?  He never had, but had he been a man with fantasies?  No, he hadn't been a fantasy man.  When he wasn't with a woman he'd just masturbated, relief really.  And he hadn't done that very often.
 
He reckoned he'd had more sex in the last four months than he'd had in the preceding twenty years.  Well, ten years.
 
"Earth to Gil Grissom."
 
"Sorry. I was thinking."
 
"I could hear.  What was so interesting?"
 
"Sex, actually."
 
"You looked serious."
 
"It was a serious thought.  I do not know, cannot imagine, how I never noticed I was gay, or even bi-sexual.  This, you, has all come so easily and so...pleasurably to me and I am, in all honesty, surprised...delighted too, but mostly surprised."
 
"It surprised me, too.  I said before, but then I think I'm just going to enjoy it."
 
"While it lasts?"
 
"I didn't say that."
 
"I was ending your sentence."  Gil also remembered that he had declared his love for Nick earlier, but Nick had not responded.
 
"Well don't, because I can do that for myself.  Gil, what you've said to me and the gifts you've sent me in the past couple of weeks, means a lot to me.  But we only really know each other as work colleagues, and although we're now officially lovers, these are early days.  You could hate me this time next week."
 
Gil nodded.  He felt a little ridiculous, standing naked in his bathroom, and even teary, as he knew full well that what Nick had just said was absolutely right.
 
"I'm sorry."
 
"Man, don't be sorry!  We ARE having a great time, and I feel optimistic, I really do, but...there's got to be a but, at least until we really get to know each other."
 
Gil nodded again, but this time Nick swept him up into a bear hug.  "You are sooo gay; I don't know how I missed it...except that I wasn't looking in your direction."  And just then his stomach rumbled very loudly.
 
"I didn't miss that.  I'm starving; I didn't eat before I came over here.  What're your breakfasts like?"
 
"Good."
 
"Come on then, get in that kitchen, Grissom."  He followed through with a slap of Gil's ass.  "I like that ass a lot, man, you'd better keep it hidden at work."  
 
"A little difficult, given its size."
 
"Hey, don't knock it, it's magnificent."
 
Gil put on another old tee and his jeans  and made his way to the kitchen.  Within moments Nick was beside him.
 
"What can I do?"
 
"Toast?"
 
"Coming up, I'll search for the stuff and you get on with the cooking.  My stomach thinks my throat's been cut." 
 
"Eggs?"
 
"Sunny side up.  You?"
 
"Same."
 
They worked quietly and efficiently beside each other.  Nick had to eat a piece of toast.
 
"Go easy or you won't want this banquet I'm slaving over."
 
"Don't bet on that.  Hurry up!"
 
"Get the juice out."
 
"Okay.  Looks good, smells good."
 
"Here."
 
Gil put two perfect eggs on to a plate of bacon, sausage patties, grilled tomatoes and mushrooms.
 
"I haven't done beans as they make me fart, and bending down at scenes becomes a risky business."
 
"Hey, me too!"
 
"There you have it then, common ground."
 
They both laughed around mouthfuls of food and Nick could see Gil's eyes twinkling; he'd never noticed that before; how his eyes made him look happy.

***

When they'd slowed down a little, having overcome their hunger, Nick sipped his coffee.
 
"Did you ever wonder why Ecklie thought I would be the right man for this new job?"
 
"Because you are the right man for the job?"
 
"As a matter of fact I think I am, but how would you know that?"  Gil sat back in his chair and retrieved his coffee, and wrapped his hands around the mug.
 
"I know that you're one of the...the very best at the job."
 
"Yeah.  But it's a big leap from CSI to being in charge of them all."
 
"Yes, Conrad said it was because of the skills you'd shown when you supervised during Catherine's sickness.  He said you were outstanding."
 
"Did he elaborate?"
 
"Not with anything specific."
 
"And you accepted what he said as face value without wanting to review the evidence?"
 
"I suppose I did, yes."
 
"Wow, you really did want to get into my pants."
 
"It wasn't that..."
 
"...just teasing.  But you didn't query why he thought I was the man for the job?"
 
"No, I didn't.  But, I thought you would be ideal as soon as he told me what he wanted from you...and me."
 
"Mmmm.  When you were away and Catherine got sick you know I did the supervising?  I did some analysis and I made some changes, nothing major.  When my supervising stint came to an end I presented my findings to Ecklie.  If it had been you I would have just given, sent, the report to you, but...you know...with Catherine, I just copied her in.  She went ape shit, man.  Really ape shit, but in a quiet way, real scary.  Greg and Riley took the brunt of it.  She couldn't have a go at me because I'd sent the report to Ecklie, and she's a bit in...awe, I think, of Ray..."
 
"...did you criticise Catherine, in this report?"
 
"No.  It was mostly analysis, before and after some changes I made to scene attendance, evidence collection and the processing at the lab.  I was able to show that grave is the best team for: crime scene attendance, evidence gathering and processing, and we improved during the weeks I was in charge."
 
"The trouble with analysing this kind of data is that all things are not equal.  All crimes are different, every murder is different and you cannot compare..."
 
"...yes, you're right to a certain extent; I never said it was an exact science.  I built in some leeway in the data, but I took crime for crime, victim profile against victim profile to match each shift's work.  I left sufficient time to encompass the oddball cases, the unexpected, so with that factored in I was able to give a good approximation of each team's work and then make a comparison. 
 
"Man, we were streets ahead.  I couldn't even have manipulated the data to give us such an advantage.  But in my short tenure, the changes I'd made, and the consequential improvements seriously pissed off Catherine.  Ecklie was shocked, I think, initially, that I'd taken the time to do it.  Off the clock, I might add.  Sad bastard without a boyfriend...at that time."
 
"So Catherine assumed it was her you were usurping, when really it was me?"  Gil had listened with pride as Nick had related his tale.  His lover had done all this, but then it struck him, that Catherine had only supervised the team for a matter of weeks, so this lay at his door, maybe he was the one who should have been aggrieved.
 
"No.  No, neither of you.  Gil, I'll send you a copy of my report, you'll see that my conclusion was that we are the best team because of you.  Okay, your skills at staff management are a little...I don't know, lacking.  But as a leader in the field, a trainer, you are the very best.  Our lab is the best outside Quantico, and that's down to you leading grave.  Grave's own stats are what keep us at the top.  The new job will be for you to bring everyone up to the same standard and for me to manage it...if what you told me is right.  I should find out tonight."
 
"I see.  But why then was Catherine so pissed?"
 
"Because, as good a CSI as she is, she doesn't understand the mechanics of data analysis and interpretation and she immediately assumed...as you did, in fact, that it was a personal attack.  I wanted to point out that we're very good, but we could be excellent if we were re-organised.  If the strengths of some staff were utilised more efficiently.  I said nothing about myself, but I did say that you would be ideal for a training manager for the whole lab.  I want the lab to be great and it looks as if I might be being given the chance to manage the change."  Nick sat back and looked at Gil, he was serious.
 
"You've got to give it to Conrad."
 
"Conrad?  Why?"
 
"Because you just gave me the same spiel that he did, and if all of that was in your report then he's read it and digested it and assumed co-authorship, if not complete ownership."
 
"I made suggestions, is all."  Nick grinned.
 
"Well, Nick, it sounds like you've moved up a notch.  I'm very proud of you."
 
"Proud?  Are you?  Seriously?"
 
"Of course I am.  What you've said, what you've done; I might just have to lie back and bask in some reflected glory.  After all, I did train you."
 
"You did."
 
"I gave you a fucking hard time though."
 
"You did, but in the end it didn't do me any actual harm did it...it made me a better CSI.  And, I've just slept with you, and something about that was fucking hard too, so you know, things are pretty good, right now."
 
Nick slid his hand across the table and Gil caught it and held it.
 
"I would have to agree.  You'd better go, you need clean clothes.  You can't be late."
 
"Yeah. I'm seeing him at eight, did he give you a time?"
 
"No, he just said to go in early."
 
"There's something else."
 
"What else?"
 
"I've been thinking about the gay thing.  To tell or not to tell."
 
"It's your decision."
 
"Does it bother you?"
 
"No."
 
"But you're new to the scene.  Don't you want to keep a low profile?"
 
"Not particularly.  I don't mind, Nick, I really don't mind one way or the other."
 
"It could have repercussions.  If I tell Ecklie that I am...we are..."
 
Gil smiled.  "You want to tell him that we're a couple?"
 
"What's wrong with that?"
 
"Nothing at all, nothing at all.  You think we're a couple?"
 
"Don't you?"
 
"I don't know.  I hope so.  You said we've got to take our time."
 
"I did, but I was just being, you know, careful."
 
"Careful?"
 
"Yeah, well, I needed some get-out.  What would have happened if you'd been a dweeb in bed?  Or had halitosis, premature ejaculation, small dick, open sores, snored excessively, wet the bed, farted...although the odd one is permissible.  See, it's not a foregone conclusion."
 
"I see what you mean.  Same for me then, though I must say that I never contemplated anything other than you being perfect!"
 
"Smart ass!"
 
"I like to think so.  You need to go, you must not be late.
 
"I know, come on, the dishes."
 
"I have a dishwasher, now go."
 
"Okay."  Nick swigged the last of his coffee and put down the mug.  "I'm gone."
 
Nick walked to the front door and Gil followed behind him.  Before opening the door Nick turned and slipped his arms around Gil's neck, and pulled him in for a kiss.  It was gentle and sweet and coffee flavoured, Nick pulled away and smiled into Gil's face.
 
"You know you said the -L'  word before we went to bed?  Well, I think I'll be telling you the same before very long; we go together, I can feel it in my bones."
 
"In your bones?"
 
"Uh-uh."
 
"I've just got to wait until it reaches your heart then?"
 
"Yeah, won't be long, I guess it's nearly there."
 
Gil leaned into Nick and kissed him, his hands running up his solid muscled back.  He could very easily get used to the feel of Nick...that's if he hadn't already succumbed.
 
He pulled away.  "Come and see me, or call me the minute you escape from Conrad.  Tell me what happened.  Promise?"
 
Nick nodded.  "I always keep my promises to you."  He whispered. 
 
"I know you do."  For some reason, Gil's eyes filled with tears, remembering the promise he'd made Nick keep when he'd been buried alive.  Why hadn't he realised then just how much he loved Nick?  He'd never know the answer to that question, but it was of little importance, not now.
 
"Go.  Now.  And I do love you very much."
 
"I know you do, I can feel it."  Nick turned, opened the door and left.  He closed the door behind him, without looking back.
 
Gil went to his window and watched Nick board his truck.  They waved to each other as he drove off.

***

Gil stood for a few moments watching the truck disappear from sight.  He then returned to his kitchen and emptied the last of the coffee pot into his mug and sat at his table, nursing the mug and remembering the last eight hours.
 
But then his mind turned to the Nick he'd thought about on his vacation in the Greek Islands.
 
He remembered how he talked to Nik about the cases Nick had been involved with...how Nick had nearly died at the hands of two murderers and the deluded father who buried him alive.  How he'd finally stood up to him when he solved a case that Gil had closed five year earlier.  It was talking about Nick all the time that had caused Nik to think Gil was gay and in love.  It was all the more ridiculous because Gil had no idea he was doing it!
 
Gil chuckled.  Nik had been dead right.  Gil remembered that Nik needed an update so he opened up his computer and went to his mail and composed a very brief message to Nik.
 
Nik
 
Mission accomplished in its entirety.
 
I owe you a tinny!  Thanks mate!
 
Gilberto xxxxxxxxxx
 
He pressed send and then sat back and thought some more about Nick.  The interesting thing about Gil's recollections was that when he pictured Nick, it was always one particular vision that he had.  Gil had always carried this vision around in his head, like he might a photograph in his wallet.
 
Nick crying after Amy Hendler had held a gun to his head.
 
Gil had wanted to hold Nick that day.  He looked so frightened and alone, but Gil had walked out with Amy Hendler and a few minutes later a composed Nick had followed him out and neither man had spoken of it since.
 
But it was that young, helpless man, who seemed little more than a boy, that was the focus for Gil for all these years and yet the reality was so far removed from that young Nick that he could almost be a different man altogether now that he knew him.
 
That was it. 
 
The Nick Stokes who'd elicited all the feelings from Gil in the last months had long since gone.  To be replaced by the new version, the man, mature, confident, knowledgeable.  A match for him.  A man on his own level.
 
Telling Nick that he loved him had not been planned or even thought of; it had taken him years to say the words to Sara and then he'd felt unsure and ultimately guilty for saying them...not feeling that he actually meant them.  But he was sure now.  Sure that he loved the man, the man whom  that young Nick had become.
 
As he thought these thoughts, Gil had a warm feeling overcome him and he felt light and happy.  He felt that he was in love for the first time in his life.   He looked at the time on his computer and decided he'd better stop daydreaming and get ready for work.
 
He loaded the dishwasher and then headed for the shower and half way there realised he'd already taken a shower...but then decided on a quick freshen up and a shave.
 
He still managed to get to work early and there was no sign of Nick or Ecklie.  He sat in his office and fidgeted and then pulled a file from his pile and tried concentrating on it; he failed.
 
About fifteen minutes later when he-d been to the break room and made a fresh pot of coffee Nick met him in the corridor.
 
"How did it go?"  Gil whispered.
 
"Great.  Can't stay here, Conrad's right behind me coming to see you."
 
"Okay.  Good.  There's fresh coffee in the break room."
 
"Thanks.  Speak later."
 
"Yes."
 
Gil went back to his office and had barely sat down again before Ecklie came in and closed the door behind him.
 
"How did it go, Conrad?"
 
"Very well.  Yes.  He accepted, of course."  Ecklie paused and the added.  "Stokes could go far you know...he's got good political sense and people skills.  A good combination."
 
"He's an all-rounder."
 
"Yes, he is.  I'm surprised you think so highly of him...you always seemed to favour Brown...Warrick..."  He paused seemingly to remember Warrick.  "...and Sara, of course.  How is she by the way?"
 
"Sara?  No idea.  We broke up after Warrick."
 
"Oh, I didn't know."
 
"But you're right about Nick.  I did favour the others and I'm ashamed of myself for doing it.  I've had some long talks with Nick since I got back...told him, apologised.  You know what he said?"  And we've made lover, he thought, but he wasn't sharing that with Ecklie.
 
"What?"
 
"That my behaviour had made him a better CSI."
 
"Ha!  There you are he's a politician.  He can obviously put a positive spin on just about everything."
 
Gil laughed.  "You're right.  So what about the position you have in mind for me?"
 
"The training role. I've spoken to Nick about it and we've got to double up on work while we get down and plan how we're going to do it and introduce it.  A damage limitation exercise for anyone that will be disgruntled about Nick leap frogging them to the job."
 
"I think you'll find that there will be minimal problems.  One thing about Nick is that he is universally liked.  I doubt if they'll begrudge him the job.
 
"I hope you're right.  Catherine?"
 
"She will be awkward but I hope she will be wise enough to see that she couldn't do the job...any more that I could.  Neither of us have the political skills."
 
"True.  We'll see.  I'm making the announcement next week.  But I want you to get together with Nick...he's already brimming with ideas about set-up and procedures...you'd be wise to listen to him..."
 
"...I will."  Gil was trying not to smile too broadly.
 
"I'm going to give you both the same status in the organisation.  I hope to God you don't fall out and start any infighting..."
 
"...I don't think either of us are the kind of person to do that.  We will have...frank discussions...I'm sure, but we will work as a team for the lab.  That's the purpose of it all isn't it?  Getting the most out of the staff and equipment we have by consolidating training and equalising the staff across the board.  Making the best use of our resources to ensure that all victims, and even the criminals, have the same excellent level of service...whomever deals with the case."
 
Ecklie's mouth was hanging open very slightly.  Even Gil was impressed with himself.  He'd obviously remembered the spiel from some management seminar he must have attended together with what Ecklie and Nick had already told him.
 
"That's it exactly."  Ecklie agreed.  Gil smiled, quite beautifully, across his desk and then picked up his coffee mug to hide the smirk that was threatening to break out.
 
When Ecklie had gone...home, he said, he been at the lab for seveteen hours...Nick almost ran into Gil's office, closed the door and sat down opposite him.  He looked quite solemn and Gil frowned but then Nick jumped up from the chair and did a little victory jig and then sat down and resumed his solemn pose.
 
Gil was laughing.  "Happy?"
 
"Moderately."  He grinned.  "He talked money and, man, am I going to get a pay rise!  Yours won't be so much because you earn more than me anyway...but you should still be able to afford my gifts..."
 
"...not indefinitely.  Do I need to do any more anyway...I have after all captured first prize?"
 
"Whoa...don't even think of letting up just yet!"  He laughed but then became serious. "I'm...we're...going to have to come up with a working plan in four weeks...it'll mean we'll be working a lot of hours off the clock."
 
"I know.  I cannot tell you, Nicky, how much more energised about work I've become in the last week..."
 
"...apart from quitting that one time?"
 
"Besides that...it's a new challenge with a new life ahead of me and I'm going to enjoy it.  We need to set out, together initially, what's got to be done and assign ourselves tasks to complete separately and then come back together to review and revise."
 
"Yeah."  Nick looked as surprised as Ecklie had done. 
 
"Just because I don't use management speak, doesn't mean I don't know how to use it...though I must tell you that between Ecklie and you I think I've used up about ten years' worth and it's unlikely you'll hear it again...unless I have to use it as a ploy to calm Catherine."
 
"Catherine.  I think, realistically, that Benson on swing and Catherine will be the most difficult to deal with when the plan is revealed."
 
"I agree.  Although Catherine does have a tendency to go ballistic and then be as right as rain the next day."
 
"Yeah, well that might be your assessment but she's been different altogether since you left and she took over...she never expected you back...but..."
 
"But?"
 
"Neither did I."
 
"Include me in that."
 
"Good job you did, I'd have never have known what I was missing."
 
"Which brings me to what are we going to do about us...in relation to work?"
 
"To be honest, I don't know.  I think I am too old to be still stuck in the closet and yet...coming out, now?  Realistically it could be seen as if we've colluded over the new jobs."
 
"I agree.  Let's leave it for now and review it on a regular basis."
 
"I thought you were done with management speak?"  Nick chuckled.
 
"I can slip one in occasionally..."
 
"...that's what I thought..."
 
And they both knew he wasn't talking about work.

***

There had been no gifts for Nick for over a week and Riley was almost despondent.  Nick didn't speak about it and appeared to be quite happy, so she was sure that she...whoever she was, was still in contact with Nick.  Greg was playing it very quietly and Nick still had the feeling that he knew something.  He was waiting for an opportunity to speak to him but figured that the longer he left it the twitchier Greg would become and the more likely he would be then to spill the beans.
 
At the shift before the announcement there was a gift and it threw them all...including Nick, who didn't even need to act surprised.
 
The box was quite small and rattled because Judy had discovered that it did and deliberately rattled it when she gave it to Nick, together with the customary cream envelope.  Catherine was pissed because she'd been sure it was all over.
 
After assignments Nick made his dash to a stall in the restroom and opened the small gift...it was in a little cardboard box and when he opened it he grinned.  It was a set of keys...he opened the note.
 
N
 
I thought this would be easier than you having to disturb me when I'm watching a game! 
 
If I'm not there the code is 051627.
 
All my love
 
G xx
 
P.S.  This is the last gift at work, for now!
 
Nick laughed when he read it because just the day before Nick had arrived at Gil's house and while Gil was preoccupied at the front door with Nick the Cubs made a home run.  And Gil had said he was stopping sending the gifts since Nick wouldn't be with the shift for much longer.
 
Their relationship, for that was what both men called it now...although Gil couldn't say the word without chuckling...was in full swing.  They were just so comfortable with each other.  Everything they did together seemed to just fall into place, naturally.
 
The sex was, especially for Gil, phenomenal, though he'd noticed that he needed more sleep but it was good sleep; he slept like he had on his vacation and he awoke relaxed and refreshed.  His HIV/STD test results came back negative and although he didn't have a lecture about safe sex there was a booklet included in the envelope.
 
Their work together to set up the new working practises was outstanding.  They both had so many ideas as to how they could move the lab forward; they incorporated, in their updates to Ecklie, working models that they were convinced would work.
 
Ecklie was more than pleased and although they both knew that he was taking the major credit for what was happening they didn't care because they would be the ones to get it up and running.  And more importantly, keep it running.  They were confident that it could be done although they did factor in resistance to change from staff.  They both knew who would be their main protagonists. 
 
And it was exactly as they predicted.  Benson complained that he'd been overlooked.  Ecklie managed him by showing his shift's statistics...and pointing out the failures; Ecklie pointed out that he was lucky not to have been demoted so it was a case of put up and shut up, or leave.  He chose to stay.
 
Catherine was a completely different kettle of fish.  No ranting and raving at Ecklie, or even Gil or Nick, but her demeanour spoke volumes and her tight-lipped look scared most of the staff sufficiently that they gave her a wide berth.
 
Nick thought he was right about one thing; it was better for Gil and him to stay firmly in the closet with the door closed than let Catherine know what was going on.  Gil agreed with his assessment.
 
It was Gil who tackled her, but only under pressure from Nick, who said he was the best man for the job.  Gil disagreed but caved immediately when Nick threatened to call a halt to the sex...
 
"If every time I disagree with you, you're going to pull the sex card I stand no chance do I?"
 
"None whatsoever."
 
"I think this might be unfair or sexual discrimination..."
 
"...it is, isn't it?"
 
"I think so."
 
"So are you going to speak to Catherine?"
 
"What option have I got?"
 
"Jerking off in the shower...alone?  On the plus side you won't have to wash the bedding so much."
 
"There is that.  I need to weigh up the pros and cons."
 
"List them."
 
Gil made a quick mental list.
 
There were two pros: cleaner bedding and not having to face Catherine.
 
There was only one con: no sex with Nick.
 
"I now have to apply weighting to them; is one very serious con, worth one fairly serious pro and one of no consequence?"
 
"It's up to you to decide."
 
"I don't think there's really much of a decision to make is there?"
 
"I don't think so."
 
"So will you go down on me again, please?"  Gil didn't really like begging but Nick had been about to swallow him whole and had then pulled back to ask him to speak to Catherine.
 
"Sure."  He dived down on Gil's now flagging erection and in moments it had recovered as Nick swallowed him...Gil's ass came clean off the bed. 
 
After assignments Gil asked Catherine to come to his office.  She arrived nearly an hour later and Gil knew she was trying to rattle him.  He didn't do rattled anymore...he was calm and relaxed.
 
As she came through the door he spoke immediately.  "Catherine, thanks for coming, close the door would you, please?"
 
She tried her best to bang it shut but it never worked because the glass doors had small gas cylinders in their hinges to prevent them being banged shut and shattered.  She knew this and it aggravated her even more.  She stood in front of his desk.
 
He looked up at her and smiled.  "Sit down, Catherine, and tell me what's wrong."
 
She didn't sit down but leaned over his desk pointing her finger at him.  "I thought you were my friend and you pull a stunt like this with little Nicky blue eyes."
 
"I believe he had brown eyes.  I did nothing.  Ecklie approached me with his idea..."
 
"...it was Nick's idea."
 
"I know that now but Ecklie presented it to me as his idea, I'd not seen Nick's report at that stage...or even knew it existed."
 
"Nick deliberately went behind my back with that report."
 
"I'm sorry.  I was lead to believe he'd copied you into it."
 
"Oh, he did at the same time as he sent it to Ecklie...I thought we had protocols here and that he should have sent it to me, his line manager, to forward to Ecklie."
 
"And would you have sent it on?"
 
"What are you trying to insinuate?"  She was shouting now.  Gil remained perfectly calm and composed and wished that Nick was there to see him.
 
"Nothing.  Nothing at all.  However, I was under the impression that Nick was the Acting Supervisor when he completed and sent in the report...so...his line manager was Ecklie at that time."  He smiled at her.
 
She had nothing to say and actually threw herself into the seat she'd been offered.
 
"So what is really wrong?"
 
"Oh...nothing.  Everything.  I waited all these years to get a supervisory position and Nick's just leap frogged over me to become a manager and you've come back..."
 
"You're going to be the graveyard supervisor..."
 
"...with Nick and you looking over my shoulder all the time."
 
"Catherine, have you actually read Nick's report?"
 
"Yes."
 
"Then surely you can see that couched in very diplomatic terms he was saying that Graveyard, your shift, was head and shoulders above the other shifts and he was able to prove it with like for like statistics.  The model he suggested is based on how we achieved the better results."
 
"I saw that.  But it doesn't change the fact that Nick's been promoted over me."
 
"He has, I cannot deny that.  But he saw an opportunity and took it...he didn't know that Ecklie and the rest of them would seize on it and put in to practise.  It never occurred to me to do what he did and yet I know I have had most of the ideas he's put forward over the years.  Have you?"
 
"Yes: some of them."
 
"Neither if us took the opportunity...or the time and trouble to put it in writing did we?"
 
"But you will benefit from it...same as Nick."
 
"I will be a trainer and mentor.  You know as well as Nick that those roles have always been my particular favourites.  Surely shift supervisor is what you wanted?  I wouldn't ever want Nick's new role...now tell me, seriously, would you?" 
 
Catherine was silent for a few moments.  "No.  No, I wouldn't."
 
"Then haven't we all got what we want?"
 
"Okay, you got me."  And just like that she caved and for all Gil's calm demeanour his hands were clammy from sweat and his heart was thumping in his chest.
 
"It was never my intention to -get you', but to point out the positives in all of this.  And, who is it, Catherine, who has my...and Nick's, ear?"
 
She smiled and looked her normal self.  "Me."
 
"You."
 
"When the hell did you ever get to be the politically savvy guy?  Did you have some kind of treatment in Greece?"
 
"I had a life changing experience and I aim to make the most of it."  But Gil and Nick had decided not to share that with Catherine...just yet.

***

Catherine had sent Nick out to a four nineteen, with Greg.  It was the first time they'd worked as a twosome for several weeks since Nick was most often paired with Ray or Riley.
 
"So...you caught a lucky break?"
 
"I did.  It was as much as a surprise to me as anyone else, I can tell you, but I wasn't going to turn it down."
 
"No way.  That's if you live long enough.  Catherine's been giving you murderous looks."
 
"I've been having pains I reckon she has a doll and is using red-hot needles."
 
"Really?"  Greg sounded as if he believed Nick.
 
"No!  I was joking."
 
"You had me..."  Greg sounded as if he was nervous and Nick knew it was time to pounce.
 
"You know, don't you?"
 
"Know?"  Greg swallowed and out of the corner of his eye Nick could see he was more than a little jittery.
 
"G..."
 
"Yeah.  I followed a delivery man out of the lab and slipped him a twenty and he rolled over, although he wouldn't normally have seen the sender he just happened to..."
 
"So?"
 
"Whatever.  Nick, I'm not bothered, really, whatever floats your boat and if you and Grissom...great; but when the announcement was made I got real nervous."
 
"Yeah, I know.  I've been closeted for years and, apparently, Gil's been lusting after me for years...I turned him down...and that's when the gifts started."
 
"And now?"
 
"What do you think?"
 
"I can see it...but you put that report in when Gil was away and I remember us all talking about him when he'd left...you thought, we all thought, he would never come back."
 
"I can tell you, man, I was shocked.  He came to my house the day he returned..."
 
"...that's when you turned him down?"
 
"Yeah."
 
"Yeah.  No wonder he didn't marry Sara."
 
"Who knew?  I didn't."
 
"He must have done.  Slow down, that's the turning."  And Nick manoeuvred his truck into the track leading to the farm.  He reckoned he'd been here before.
 
It was nearly eight hours later when Nick started their drive back to the lab.
 
"I've been thinking..."
 
"...that's pretty dangerous territory."
 
"Ha. Ha.  So not funny.  These gifts that Grissom's been sending you."
 
"What about them?"
 
"What did he get you?"
 
Nick laughed.  "You think I'm going to tell you?"
 
"Go on Nick.  I won't say a thing."
 
"You'd better not, G.  This is top secret stuff...at least for the next few months until everything settles down."
 
"I know.  You can trust me."
 
"I know I can."
 
"So...what was in that big box?"
 
"A Stetson."
 
"Wow...a good gift for a Texan.  Oh, no, hold on.  That's too much information, I don't like where my mind's going with that."  He looked stricken.  Nick laughed...and laughed.  He was still chuckling when they arrived at the LVPD parking lot.
 
They unloaded the truck and made their way to the evidence room to sort through their evidence and send it on its way to the various departments. They'd just started the task when Catherine came to the door.
 
"Nick, could I see you for a moment, please?"  Both men immediately noticed the change in her tone and demeanour.
 
"Sure."  He went out into the corridor and she stopped him with a hand to his chest.
 
"I want to apologise for my behaviour.  I've been a bit stupid and I didn't mean to be.  You, and Gil, can count on my full support."  She reached up and hugged him.
 
Nick returned the hug and over her shoulder he could see Greg looking at them and he grinned at him.  And made a mental note to reward Gil for whatever it was he'd done.
 
When he finished work Nick drove over to Gil's house...he'd been doing it ever since their first sex.  He knocked on the door but then opened it with the key; he found Gil on his couch nursing a drink that looked like liquor.
 
"Whatever you did, it worked!"  He grinned as he threw himself into the couch beside Gil causing Gil to have to steady his glass to stop it spilling. "What're you drinking?  Cold tea?"
 
Gil raised his eyebrows and tried to take the high ground but it was impossible with a grinning Nick just inches away from him.
 
"Brandy.  To steady my nerves.  I have no idea how I did it but I talked her -round, kept my cool and she saw the error of her ways.  I don't think she'll be openly hostile again...but it is Catherine."
 
"She apologised and hugged me...in front of a witness.   I think Greggo went home with a headache, his brain was overloaded.  He does knows about us...bribed a delivery guy...but he will keep the secret."  Nick took the glass from Gil and took a sip and then pulled a face.  "I'll get a beer."
 
When he came out of the kitchen holding the beer bottle he leaned on the door frame and took a swig and looked across at Gil, clearly thinking about something before he spoke.
 
"I know you're a brand new gay guy...but do you want to do anal?"
 
Gil smirked.  "I thought you'd never ask."  He got up from the couch and finished his drink in one gulp grimacing as it burned his gullet.  "I don't know the protocols...that was a word Catherine used...I didn't know if you did it, or whether I should ask or what...Henri, in Mykonos, wanted to, but I turned him down, I wasn't ready...or he wasn't the right person."
 
"What about your other Nik?"
 
"It was never going to be about the freckle...he made that clear at the outset."
 
"The what?"
 
"It's Australian slang, Strine it's called, and a freckle is the anus.  He used some weird expressions...I don't know if he was deliberately having me on or if he really talked like that."
 
"Do you miss him?"
 
"We had a good time and we were good friends...fuck buddies.  But, no, I don't miss him, I have you..."
 
"That was the right answer.  I usually top.  I do bottom..."
 
"...I don't know if I can do either, yet.  Although I have done some research on the subject in the last week.
 
"You want to have a go?  Got lube?  Loads of lube?   Condoms?"
 
"I have all the supplies.  In fact I embarrassed myself at the pharmacy."  He smiled a little sheepishly.
 
"What happened?"
 
"I just spent a lot of time reading all the descriptions on the available lubricating lotions and then the different type of condoms and I became aware of giggling and two girls...they only looked about twelve but they were working there and they had obviously been watching a very dirty old man spend an inordinate amount of time looking at personal products." 
 
Nick was doing a fair impression of a giggling girl at Gil's obvious discomfort.  "So, what did you do, ask them which ones they preferred?"
 
"No!  I left and went to another pharmacy and bought what I wanted there."
 
"Poor babe."  He hugged Gil to him.  "Maybe, when we find out if you like it...we can go bareback...but we'll still need lube."  At the very mention of the word, -bareback', Gil felt his cock twitch.  Nick felt it too.  "You're an old horn dog, Gil Grissom."
 
Gil pulled back and grinned.  "You think so?"
 
"I know so.  Now come on get in the shower...we'll go separately or we'll be tempted to spoil the fun."
 
"Spoilsport."
 
"It's for the greater good."   Nick squeezed his ass cheeks. "Now git."
 
"Going, going, gone."  Gil pulled away and made a quick getaway in the direction of his stairs.  Nick grinned to himself.  He was going to enjoy himself this...he checked his watch...morning.

***

Twenty minutes later they were lying in bed on their backs staring at the ceiling.  Gil had asked for any last minute instructions and after Nick had calmed down from his laughing fit he said he'd think about it and that's what he was doing.  Silently.
 
Gil was growing impatient; as was his cock and Nick's too, he could see.  "Have you thought?"  He asked.
 
"Just thinking it through."  He spoke innocently enough but his face was anything but innocent.
 
"So?"
 
"It'll probably hurt until you come and then it won't and you'll be past caring.  Okay?"
 
"It's taken you five minutes to think that through?"
 
"I like to be thorough and I know you do too."  Nick smirked.
 
"In your own time then, Nick, I'll have a snooze while I'm waiting."  He turned onto his side facing away from Nick and punched his pillow into submission as he prepared to sleep.
 
"Petulant, Dr Grissom?"
 
"No, just resting up."  He smiled as Nick turned and spooned behind him, his hard-on nestling in the crack of Gil's ass.
 
Nick ran his hand up Gil's outer thigh and down again and Gil's knees pulled themselves up into an almost foetal position.  Gil couldn't believe the involuntary response of just a hand running up and down his thigh...but then, it was Nick's hand.
 
"Are you okay to go?"  Nick whispered in his ear making the hairs on his neck stand up.
 
Gil uncurled his body and turned onto his back.  "I'm ready."
 
Nick leaned in and kissed him his tongue dived straight into his mouth and was running around his mouth at will...over his teeth and up on the roof of his mouth...that tickled and he squirmed a little but Nick was relentless.  When he pulled away Gil gasped a lung full of air but Nick didn't stop the assault and moved to his neck and ears and along his clavicle and back. Gil was being overpowered and he was helpless to stop it...not that he wanted to for one nanosecond.  But he wanted to kiss Nick the way he was being kissed and stroked but he couldn't escape from Nick's dominant display.  Gil was squirming and smiling in equal measure.
 
As Nick made his way down Gil's body Gil was able to touch and stroke Nick a little more, marvelling at the smooth skin with the underlying hardness of his toned body.  Gil had never felt anything quite like it.  It felt as if his fingertips had become sexually and electrically charged with the feelings and they were transmitting those feelings all over his body.
 
Hi cock was leaking by the time Nick had arrived with his face on his groin.  All Nick did was lick the end and then left it and Gil strained to see what he was going to do.  Nick pushed his legs open and dived down, ignoring the one eyed snake desperately seeking attention, and going for Gil balls.
 
He rolled them around a little with his fingers and then captured one ball and then the other with his mouth. Sucking and pulling and tonguing them.  He pulled away and sat back on his haunches.
 
"They are the hairiest balls I've ever encountered and I've never seen such curly pubes."  He chuckled.
 
"You think I should shave them?"  Gil asked the strangulated question; he was really not in a position to enter into any coherent conversation.
 
"Nooo...I like them.  I'm going to call you Curly, I've decided, and when I do I'm not referring to your white curls on top but these grey ones below...I wonder if they'll go white...I could call you Snowy then."  He was grinning.
 
"And I could call you cockteaser...come on...I'm dying here."
 
"I'm having a rest...this is heavy work after a long shift."  But as soon as he finished speaking he went down again and this time he lifted Gil's legs up and wider and licked at Gil's perineum with the tip of his tongue and then stroked his tongue over Gil's anus.
 
"Arghhh..." Gil sounded as if it had hurt and Nick pulled back.
 
"You okay?"
 
"Oh God!  You've stopped to ask me...don't stop.  Don't..."  Gil was breathing heavily and felt the need to pump his own cock a little to ease the pressure and pump himself to orgasm.  Nick batted his hand away.
 
"No touching.  You cannot come before I get in there or it will too sensitive.  Grin and bear it...Curly."
 
Gil was almost...but not quite, despondent.  He was desperate to come, desperate to have Nick inside him, desperate for him to stop and desperate for him not to stop.  He groaned.
 
"Stop being so dramatic; anyone would think you were queer.  Oh, I forgot, you are."  He laughed and went down again and started the process once more but this time he breached Gil with his tongue causing Gil's loudest groan so far.  Gil heard Nick chuckle from his position on his knees, buried deep between his legs.
 
But then Nick dropped Gil's legs and pulled back.  "Okay.  The time has come...excuse the pun."  He chuckled and Gil wondered if he wasn't treating this all a bit flippantly. "Best for your first time is on your knees with your ass in my face.  That lovely ass."
 
"Right. Finally."  Gil gasped out as he rolled over and assumed the instructed position.
 
"Huh.  Cheek."  And Nick gave Gil's right cheek a resounding slap with his open hand.
 
"Ahhh.  Gil tried to shout out but it was a pretty feeble effort.
 
"I'll kiss it better."  Nick bent over the ass cheek he'd just slapped and chewed and sucked at the spot unto Gil was squirming...again.
 
"Are you...are you...hickey...ass..."  Was as much as Gil could get out.
 
"Man, I can't put one on your neck now can I?"
 
"Mmmm..."  Gil thought that was probably right but his brain was seriously befuddled.  And actually the sting of the slap was not hurting at all.  No, it wasn't pain he felt it was a tingling that was being transmitted to his cock and he groaned.
 
"I'd better get this over with or you'll be losing your load too soon."  Gil could hear movement behind him but he mind was just so unfocussed he couldn't actually understand what was going on but he jumped when a cold dollop of lube was spread on his ass.
 
And then he felt something pushed into his ass and he couldn't quite feel what it was but it was by no means hurting or unpleasant and it was moving around and he was feeling...good.  Then something else went in and suddenly it was tighter and not quite so good.  But it was moving around and Gil could feel it and all of a sudden he realised it was Nick's fingers and he was okay with that so he relaxed.
 
"Good man."  Nick murmured to his back.  "Push back on them and keep relaxed...I'm looking for..."  He stopped because he'd found what he was looking for and Gil jerked quite violently.
 
"Whoa...I found it."
 
"I've come."  Gil's voice sounded as if he had a very bad strep throat.
 
"I don't think you have...just lost a bit with the pressure on you prostate."  While he was talking a third finger was added and to Gil it felt...not so good...was all he could come up with.  He thought he was moaning but then he wasn't so sure it was him but then it wasn't Nick so it must be him...
 
"Okay, my brave new gay guy...here goes.  Breathe with it and try to relax, getting tense will make it worse and try and hold this thought, -It will get better."  Gil heard Nick and nodded and then heard him take a big breath and release it slowly.
 
It felt as if he was being pulled apart.  And it hurt...but it was manageable, he thought...it was funny his mind was clearing and he then realised that his once very hard, desperate to ejaculate cock, was flaccid.  Blood had returned to his brain...inconveniently at the most painful juncture.  And he was sweating up a storm...he'd been hot and sweaty but now it was running off his face onto his pillow and he could feel it on his back.  His fingers were clenched in the edges of the pillowcase.  It was hurting more and more and he was about to call out when Nick spoke first...his assured tone of minutes ago gone and he sounded as desperate as Gil felt.
 
"God, Gil, you're tight but I'm home; that's as far as I can get...jeez you feel good...man...good.  Going to draw out and start a bit of thrusting...relax, there's loads of lube and when I can find your pleasure dome...you'll forget this bit..."  Nick leaned right over Gil and whispered, quite hoarsely.  "You did great so far...just hold on..."
 
"I've lost my erection..."  Gil mumbled from his pillow.
 
He felt Nick chuckle...it was an all over body chuckle inside and out of him.  "It'll be back...I promise.  You hear?  I promise."  Gil nodded and he really tried to relax even as he was sure was Nick ripping him apart.
 
Nick pulled nearly all the way out and the momentary relief caused Gil to sigh but before it was finished with Nick pushed back in and Gil was rapidly reaching a point when he was going to have to stop Nick and then...
 
...on a down stroke Nick caught his prostate and a flash of electricity went to his balls, his cock and his spine in that order; his limbs were tingling and his flaccid cock was filling; his brain was shutting down and the pain was being overwhelmed with pleasure and he relaxed and he heard Nick mumble.
 
"Yeah, babe, yeah."
 
Gil pushed his ass up to meet Nick as he stroked him and although he didn't hit the spot every time when he did it was the very best sensation Gil had ever had...even with the underlying pain.  All he could think of was, Nick promised and he was right...he was right. 
 
He was also aware that Nick was losing his rhythm and that he was going to come and the speed was hurting but then he was hitting his prostate over and over in quick succession and Gil was sure his balls were going to be strangulated they were so tight and nearly in his ass anyway...and Nick was coming with his sighs and heavy breaths to which Gil was quickly becoming accustomed.
 
As he was finally spent Nick leaned over Gil's back and the combined heat of the two men was phenomenal...but Gil needed to come...he needed...  He tried to speak but only grunts came out because Nick was squashing him but somehow Nick knew and reached underneath Gil and grasped his cock.  He tugged at it once, just once...and Gil was coming so hard he knew he was squeezing Nick's erection which was still hard in his ass...and it felt wonderful.  He felt wonderful.
 
Nick lay on Gil's back and croaked.  "Did I tell you yet that I love you?"
 
"I know you do."  Gil's pillow muffled voice sounded happy to both of their ears.
 
Nick pulled out of they rolled onto their backs alongside each other.  Gil stretched out his limbs.  He didn't think he would be able to make any more movement for some time.
 
They lay there panting; Gil bathed in sweat and ejaculate and he had a very strange sensation in his ass.  He couldn't quite decide if it was good or bad.  His heart was pounding in his chest and his ass was kind of pounding too...he was suddenly aware that the bed was shaking slightly and he moved his head around to face Nick.
 
Nick was sweating and panting too but he was also chuckling and that's why the bed was shaking.  He looked at Gil as he'd turned his head and started laughing out loud.
 
Gil, still gasping for a lung full of air, didn't know whether to be offended or not. "Why?"  Was all he could muster from his foggy brain.
 
"Man!  The freckle..."
 
When they'd partially recovered from their joint laughing fit Gil Grissom lay there for a few moments and realised that he was satisfied with everything; his work, his private life.  Everything had fallen, finally, into place.   He looked over at the now sleeping form of his new lover and smiled and he remembered that his personal Odyssey had begun just a few short months ago in Greece.  The irony was that an even greater journey was now beginning at home.  On this journey he was in love...and loved in return.  His very last thought before falling asleep was that he must re-read Homer's Odyssey...
 
The End
 
A/N 2:  As ever grateful thanks to everyone who's read my latest offering...a fic I started in 2009, ignored for two years, and then finished in 2011! A special thanks to those of you who've taken the time to post a comment...I really appreciate the extra effort you make!

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