Previous part of Making Friends....

***

A few weeks later Gil pulled up his truck outside the Las Vegas Dog Pound.  Nick was with him and Sam sat on the back seat in his safety harness.  As soon as the truck's engine stilled, Sam started whining.

Both men twisted around and looked at him.  "I haven't heard him whine before." Gil said.

"I have...but not much.  I think he looks worried...scared.  You know I bet he can sense the mood of the dogs here.  Their fright."

Gil looked at Nick and nodded his agreement.  "You could be right.  Let's get this over and done with...do you want to stay here with him while I make enquiries?"

"Yeah, might be a good idea, if he's bad here he could be worse inside."

"Okay, I'll see what I can do."  Gil smiled at Nick and spoke to Sam.  "It's okay Sam...you're going nowhere."

Gil jumped out of the truck and Nick watched him go to the front door of the building, he looked back and smiled before opening the door and going inside.  Nick smiled back.  

Sam whined again and Nick twisted again to look at him.  "It's going to be okay, Sam.  Gil might even find you a playmate.  Here."  Nick put his hand in his pocket and retrieved a small biscuit and Sam leaned forward to take it as Nick held it for him.  "Won't be long.  Be patient."

Gil had walked into the office and had been greeted by a woman, maybe in her thirties and whose name tag said she was Marcie; she looked over worked and harassed and was sorting papers in a reception area.

"Morning."  Gil started.  "I'm here to see if I can adopt a dog."

"Then you're in the right place.  Anything particular?"

"Well...I don't want to be too prescriptive or I could talk myself out of the market place...but I would like a large dog, maybe a youngish bitch.  Must be friendly with other dogs because I do dog sit a GSD for a friend so I would be walking them together."

"Right.  Hold on."  She looked thoughtful and went out of a door at the back of the reception.  She was gone for quite a few minutes and then came back out.

"Have you had dogs before?"  She asked Gil.

"Yes.  I lost my boxer to cancer a couple of months ago...I've waited a while but..."

"...just this morning we got a dog in that does fit your criteria.  If you don't mind me being indiscreet we were all appalled.  A woman brought her in...it was her husband's dog.  He died in a car wreck and he hasn't even been buried yet..."  She was clearly amazed and disgusted with the woman.  "...but she didn't want the dog.  Hated it.  I got the impression her late husband thought more of the dog than he did of her...but then that was not hard to see...sorry."

"Don't mind me.  I have some experience of that type of situation."

"Oh?"

Gil wasn't going to share much but thought it would help.  "My ex-wife accused me of the same."

"Right."  Gil could tell he had won her over.  "I love my dogs...and if you don't mind me saying...some people just don't feel the same."

"No.  The dog you have..."

"...sorry.  It's a bitch, she's not quite two.  Spayed.  She's a Japanese Akita and her name is Belle.  She's been here for about five hours and all she's done is cry...she's obviously devastated at losing her owner.   We've put her with an older Lab to keep her company and she's been leaning on him, literally...it's heart-rending."  Marcie smiled but looked as if she would cry at any moment.  Though touched by the story Gil wasn't feeling that emotional.

"Could I meet her?  And I've bought Sam along to see if they gel...he's the GSD."

"That's a good idea.  You have to fill in adoption papers and well, the other thing is we would expect a sizeable donation for her...we don't often have such...beautiful, well groomed dogs available.  We depend on donations."

"Of course, it goes without saying."

The woman nodded and went out again.  Gil heaved a sigh and walked to the window and looked out at his truck.  He could see Nick talking to Sam.   Just three weeks ago Gil had moved into the new house, the white house as he always referred to it now...and realised very quickly that without Hank it was more than lonely.  As was living alone without Nick.  He needed a companion.  But this did sound too good to be true on his first visit.  Well...he'd see.

About ten minutes later Marcie returned with the dog.  Gil looked at the dog and she took his breath away; she was the most beautiful dog he'd ever seen.   She was white and reddish light brown with a noble bearing and the signature curled tail.  She did look morose, Gil thought.  She was on a lead with a strap around her muzzle.  Gil smiled at her and dropped down to his haunches where he'd been standing and held out his hand to her.

"Hello, Belle.  You're a beauty aren't you?"

Marcie smiled at Gil and loosened her hold on Belle's lead and she went straight to Gil and muzzled his hand.  He had some of Sam's biscuits in his jacket pocket and took one out and let her sniff it.  He released the muzzle and offered her the biscuit again and she took it, gently from his fingers but then dropped it on the floor.  But then she moved right up to Gil and pushed her whole body at him.  He rubbed her fur along her back.

"Hey, Belle, you miss your dad don't you?  Well I think I might be your new dad...do you want to meet Sam?"   He looked up at Marcie.  "May I bring in Sam?"

"Yeah.  I'll hold her."  She held onto the Akita as Gil went to the door an opened it...Belle strained hard at her leash to go with Gil and Marcie had to hold her with all her strength.  Gil waved at Nick to come in and then closed the door and went back to Belle.

"Looks like you've taken a shine to me."  Just then the door opened and Nick and Sam came into the room.  Sam was clearly skittish.

"I think he knows what this place is...he's not a happy bunny."  Nick told the woman.  "Wow...now that's a mighty fine dog.  What do you think, Sam?"

Nick held Sam on a tight lead and led him to the dog and they sniffed one another...and immediately adopted the standard sixty-nine position.

"What do you think, Sam?"  Sam ignored Nick while he continued sniff around Belle with her sniffing back.  "Is there somewhere they could run together for a little while...see how they get on?"

"There's a small park around the block...you could walk them there...but you'd have to leave the keys of your truck...you know to make sure you bring her back."

"I assure you we will...have you got the keys Nick?"

"Yeah."  He handed over the keys to Marcie.  "Come on you guys let's see how you get on."

"Turn right and then right again and you'll see the park."

"Thanks."

Gil took Belle's lead and off they went.  Outside Nick took off San's lead and he walked beside Nick.   Belle walked to heel with Gil and seemed brighter already to have left the pound.  Gil told Nick about Belle's misfortune.

In the park Sam ran around sniffing the unfamiliar places but Belle had to remain on her lead.

"Should I take a chance and let her off?  What do you think?"

"I don't know...it's risky.  She might take off for her old home...looking for her master."

"You're right.  But what do you think?  She seems great."

"If it was me Gris...Gil..."  He smiled and rolled his eyes he was still having trouble with his name.  "...I'd take her.  She's beautiful and seems okay with you.  Trained.  Why not see how you get on at home with her?"

"Okay.  It seems an easy decision to make.  But I have a favour to ask.  It's your night off...would you stay over at my place with Sam...settle her in and we can let them off in the yard and see how they really get on?"

"Good plan.  Drop me off...she can come into my place while I pack a few things...see how Sam likes someone muscling in on his territory and then I can follow you over to your place.  Have you managed to get it tidy?  Unpacked all those boxes?"

"Most of them."  He laughed.  There's still a few stacked up waiting to be opened...I've got to get rid of some stuff though.  New house, new broom and some of my stuff just looks out of place in the white."

"Might have to change the colour now you have a new dog shaking around."

"I thought I would anyway...it's a bit relentlessly white."  He chuckled and spoke to Belle.  "See what you think of it Belle, a female perspective.

Gil gave Marcie a cheque for a thousand dollars...she'd asked for five hundred.  She was delighted.

Sam was quite happy to have Belle share his space and Nick followed Gil in his truck back to the white house.

Belle settled in quite well but it seemed to Gil that she could be melancholic and she didn't eat well for the first week but gradually she settled.  She must have known, or sensed that her old master was gone and that now she had Gil and that it wasn't an altogether bad thing.  Very soon the two men became firm friends with Belle.  But Sam...Sam loved Belle...

***

It was Nick's idea.  Their lives ambled on; work, dog walking but not much play.  Nick had gone back to Texas for three days at Christmas and had then worked at New Year.   Gil had visited with his Mom.  One day at work Nick thought it would be good to get away from it all for a few days.  He had a lot of vacation days he needed to take.

He laughed when he told Gil, since they all used to laugh at Gil for his accumulated vacation days and here he was in exactly the same position.

"I was wondering whether we, you, me, the dogs, could go away for a weekend, say, and take Eli.  Rent a cabin in a park, Grand Canyon, Bryce, whatever.   I mean we would have to ask Tina and Eli...but it would be good for Eli to get out of the city and good for Tina to have a break."

"That's an excellent idea.  Although...I have a lot of experience of dogs; I have no experience of children."

"I think you just treat 'em the same.  Feed and water 'em and give 'em lots of love."

Gil laughed.   "Promise me you won't tell Tina...or Sara that?  I doubt we'd be allowed to take Eli."

"You got it."  They laughed together and Sam and Belle watched them both...sure they were plotting something and hoped it included them.

Tina was a little wary of letting Eli go...not into the capable hands of Nick and Gil but because she would miss him.  Eli was ecstatic, of course, not about Nick and Gil or the idea of a cabin in the woods but because he would get to spend time with Sam and Belle.  He loved the dogs as they loved him.

But Tina did think it would be good for Eli.  They would go on a Friday afternoon and be back Sunday night so Eli wouldn't miss school and since he'd never spent one night away from home...even when he was with Child Services they'd let him go home with Tina...then if he was homesick two nights away would be more than long enough.  If he wasn't maybe they could go again sometime.

Nick made all the arrangements.  A cabin in Bryce Canyon which was about three hundred miles north from Vegas and they could get there in a few hours.  The weather forecast said it would be sunny but cold.  So Nick and Gil took Tina and Eli to the outlets and kitted him out with some warm clothing.  Nick paid despite Tina's protests.

They all went back to the white house where Gi had made up a chicken casserole and left it cooking in a slow cooker.

Eli wasn't bothered about the house but played with the dogs in the yard.  He never lost interest in throwing a ball for them both... and the dogs would never lose interest in retrieving it.  There was only one ball and each of the dogs liked to get to it first and return it, but there was no animosity when the other got there first.

Tina loved the house and spent time in the kitchen just touching the white surfaces and cupboards.  Gil had bought a new kettle and toaster and other kitchen appliances in lime green to try and offset the white.

"I'm going to decorate in the Spring.  Nothing spectacular but maybe some earth tones on the walls around here..."  He indicated the open plan room on the whole of ground floor.  "...and if you think I know what I'm talking about, you'd be sadly mistaken.  It was Nick's idea.  Terracotta's the colour.  I was thinking blue..."

"...oh no...it would be too much like the white...a cold colour even in the desert heat."  Tina laughed as Nick nodded and Gil shrugged his shoulders.

"I know when an argument is lost.  Dinner's ready.  Call Eli, Ni...Tina, please."  He amended his request but she laughed.

"Don't worry...I know he'll come straight in if Nick calls but if I call it'll be, 'just five more minutes mom'!"

They all laughed and Nick thought how much better Tina was now and it was only a matter of a couple or three months.

Eli was very excited about the weekend away.  But they all decided that it would be a good idea for Eli to actually spend a night away from home to try it out...and the decided that since Nick would have to work it would be at Gil's house.  Gil was slightly concerned about it being at his house without Nick but he would be there for Eli's bedtime on the Friday and for some of the following day.

So the Friday before their mini vacation Nick collected Eli after school and drove him over to Gil's house.  Of course Sam was staying the night too and Nick would be sleeping there the next day.

Eli was unconcerned about being away from home and played in the yard with the dogs and helped Gil groom Belle.  She was well behaved and stood still on the grooming table while Gil, and then Eli...he had to stand on a box...brushed her coat.  Eli was almost hysterical with laughter when Gil cleaned her ass.

"They don't wipe their bottoms, Eli, so you have to check, quite often, that they haven't got a dirty bottom.  Just brush off the..."  He was going to say dried faeces but changed it. "...dried poo.  It'll brush out easily.  But you must be very sure to wash your hands afterwards."  Gil thought he was doing a good job.  Nick was sitting on the patio watching.

"You going to do Sam for me?"

"I can do.  What do you say, Eli?"

"Oh yeah.  Come on Sam, your turn."

Sam wasn't such a happy dog when he was being groomed and insisted on sitting down as much as he could.  He positively loathed having his ass brushed and looked around at Gil with such disgust that Gil laughed at him.

"Don't care how much you stare at me...your ass has to brushed."  Gil told Sam and Eli looked at Gil with wide eyes.

"Mom says I'm not supposed to say that word."

Gil frowned wondering what word it was and then realised.  "And she's quite right.  I shouldn't have said it, but I'm a grown up and sometimes we say things we're not supposed to."  Gil smiled over at Nick who was chuckling quietly.

After a week at school and then playing with and grooming the dogs, Eli was tiring fast and not long after his dinner he started to droop.

"Come on Eli, let's get you ready for bed.  Bath or shower?"

"I don't have to have a bath."  Despite his tiredness he spoke quite confidently

"I think you do, man, wash all that school stuff off and the dog hairs and all that..."  Nick was about to say shit and had to stop himself.  He would also have to watch his language around Eli.

"All that what?"  Eli wanted to know.

Nick laughed.  "All that dirt you've accumulated today."

"I've been extra clean today."

"Have you?"  Then a thought struck Nick. "Have you ever heard of a microscope?"  Eli shook his head.  "Hold on."  Gil was in the kitchen area clearing up after dinner.  "Hey Gil have you got a microscope?"

"Of course I have.  Do you want it?"

"Sure do."

Eli, of course, was getting increasingly tired and by the time Gil had got it out of a cupboard and set it up, Eli couldn't keep his eyes open to see the demonstration.

,"I think you're going to have to take him to bed.  He's too sleepy for a bath.  He's won, Nick."  Gil was bemused.

"Yeah, I guess he has.  He's still got to wash up and clean his teeth."

"You'll probably have to hold him up at the sink.  Just go for teeth cleaning.  He's not really too bad.  And he washed his hands thoroughly before dinner.  I was going to read him a story too.  I found an old book of mine that I really cherish from my own childhood."

"Don't think it'll be needed."

"No."

Nick hauled Eli up into his arms and Eli didn't even stir.  Cleaning his teeth was very hit and miss and in the end Nick didn't bother with his PJ's...he let him sleep in his vest and underpants.  He smoothed his hair and kissed his forehead.  Gil was watching from the door.

"You'll have to tell Tina...if you don't Eli will tell her and we'll look incompetent."

"Yeah...we are aren't we?"  Nick chuckled and Gil joined in.  Nick turned out the bedroom light and went to pull the door closed...but not quite shut when Eli spoke.

"You said I could have Sam to guard me."

"I did.  He'll be right outside your door when he's been out for his evening walk.  Night, sleep tight."

But Eli was asleep again. 

"I'll take the dogs for a quick walk now before I go to work."

"I'll come with you for some fresh air."  Gil responded and Nick stood still and stared at him.

"What's wrong?"

"Young boy.  In bed?  You're thinking of leaving him alone while we both go out dog walking?"

"Shit.  I told you I was no good at this child rearing."

Nick laughed.  "It's one night Gil."

"Has it only been one evening?"

"Yeah."  They both laughed.  "You want to take the dogs then?"

"I will, just a short walk."

"Okay.  I'll make up some sandwiches for work."

"See you in a few."  Gil went off to find the leads and get the dogs and Nick stopped and thought about what Gil had just said.  See you in a few was what he said and he'd never heard Gil say it before.  He thought back to what Sara had said about Gil not changing.  He was obviously capable of some change.

***

Tina was very happy to see Eli back the next day.  Gil took him home because Nick needed to sleep.  They'd all taken the dogs to a park and had a long walk and finished off with pizza for lunch.  Eli went off to his bedroom and Gil talked with Tina while they had a coffee.

"He fell asleep last night and we couldn't bath him...though he assured us he was clean."

She laughed.  "That's his Friday night pattern I should have warned you...I guess he thinks no school on Saturday so he doesn't need to be clean.  Was he good?"

"Exemplary.  No problems at all.  He helped groom the dogs.  He helped feed them this morning and he's been on a long hike too...he'll be tired again tonight I bet."

"He always sleeps well since he's always a busy little boy.  Thanks, Gil, for taking care of him.  I really appreciate what Nick and you are doing for him.  I went out with Sara...she took me to a restaurant...I can't remember the last time I went somewhere nice to eat...oh, except the white house with you..."

"...that doesn't count.  You can't beat a good night out at a proper restaurant."

"It was good.  And she's going to help with some decorating next weekend when you're all away.  Did he miss me?"

"I don't think...well I don't know...of course.  But he seemed happy with us...and the dogs do make a big difference but then he was happy to be coming home to you."

Tina smiled.  "That's good, I think, that he feels secure enough to leave me and be with you."

"If I'm honest Tina, I think the main attraction is the dogs.  He loves them both and Sam slept with him...on the floor of course."

She laughed but then became serious.  "Will you talk to him about Rick?"

"Funnily enough Nick and I did talk about that last night.  We thought that if Eli says something we'll address it as best we can but we won't bring it up, specifically, unless there's a natural opening."

"You'll play it by ear then?"

"Exactly."  He smiled at her.  He thought she was looking very well, better even than when he'd last seen her.  It was what Eli deserved and he guessed that Sara probably was the driving force behind it...he just hoped she would know when to step back a little and let Tina cope on her own again.

Gil left after half an hour and Eli gave him a hug...it was the first time he'd really hugged him although Gil had seen Nick and him hug many times.  He felt happy as he got in his truck to drive home via the mall.  He felt he was doing something for Warrick.

But the best laid plans can fall apart and on the next Thursday before they were due to leave, Eli was covered from head to toe in a rash.  Chicken pox was doing the rounds at his school and he had a temperature and was clearly not well enough to go with the men and dogs.  He was distraught.

Nick spoke to him on the phone, rather than visit although he felt bad for that.  "Hey, I have lots of vacation days so we can go in a few weeks' time, when you're all better.  You wouldn't enjoy the truck ride much if you were feeling sick and not being in your own bed...when you're sick the very best place in the whole world is your own bed."

When Nick had worked his logical magic on Eli he was less distraught but Nick had guaranteed another weekend in the next six weeks.  Nick had to hedge his bets about when since he didn't know, exactly, when he was going to be able to take off another weekend from work.

Nick and Gil decided they would go ahead with the vacation.  The cabin was paid for and without Eli they could start out early on Friday morning and if they could get the cabin for another night not come back until Monday.  Nick called the booking agent and got another night without any problem.  So the men had to pack a little extra clothing, and food for themselves and Sam and Belle.  Both dogs were excited, sensing an adventure.

Packed and loaded they agreed to share the driving of Nick's truck.  Belle and Sam were secure in their safety harnesses on the back seat.

Driving conditions were good and they stopped a couple of times for coffee and dog exercising and arrived only five and a bit hours after they'd started out. Gil had done all of the driving because he was fresh from a good night's sleep...Nick had worked.

The wooden cabin was great, with a porch with wooden seats out front.  There were four single beds in an open gallery, with a rail, over a kitchen and living room.  The bathroom was downstairs.  It was all-electric except for a log burning stove in the living room area.  It was basic but had the necessities and seemed warm and comfortable.  They were virtually in the middle of a wood with a track up to the cabin and the nearest neighbour was probably two or three hundred yards away and certainly out of sight.

It was also freezing cold outside.  The temperature had plummeted as they'd driven north and climbed.

"It's fucking cold, Nick."  Gil grimaced as they unpacked the truck.  They'd left the dogs in their harness for a few minutes so they could get everything inside and then find some warmer clothes and take them for a run.

"Quit whining...you're worse than the dogs."

"They don't whine."

"Exactly."

"You think you're so funny."  Gil smirked at Nick and then blew hot air into his hands.

"Yeah, I reckon I am.  I'll light the stove before we go for a walk."

"Okay, I forgive you your humourless remark for coming up with a good idea."

Nick laughed.  As Gil finished bringing in all their gear and provisions Nick had a flame in the stove.  They heard Belle bark.

"Uh-uh.  She's letting you know she's had enough and wants out."

"She can wait a few minutes...I need to show her who's boss."  He chuckled knowing full well that he was probably second on the pecking list after Sam.

"Sure you do..." but Nick was in no doubt as to who was the boss, "...I'm hungry but a short walk'll make me appreciate the food more."

"I was originally thinking of having just a sandwich but maybe some hot soup would be better."

"You brought soup?"

"I've brought enough food for several weeks and then some."

Nick laughed.  "And when we run out...on Sunday...we'll just have to go huntin',  shootin' and fishin'."  He spoke in his best Texan twang.

"Don't joke...the apocalypse could happen at any time and we'd be forced to remain here and become backwoodsmen."  He deadpanned at Nick.

"Did you bring a gun by any chance?"

"That would be a 'no'."  He looked apologetic.

"I brought my handgun from work.  Can't be too careful...defence and all that."

Gil stared at Nick for a few moments, his thoughts interrupted by Belle barking again.  "I guess you're right but it never crossed my mind."

"Do you actually own a gun?"

"No."  He shrugged then smiled.  "I was counting on you to be the alpha male and I'll do the cooking."

Nick laughed.  "The fire's taken hold.  Come on let's get the dogs.  I'd put Belle on her lead if I were you since you don't know if she's got the hunting instinct...she could take off..."

"...that's good advice."

"I'm full of it."

"You're full of something that's for sure."  They put on their walking boots followed by their heavy duty anoraks, scarves, hats and gloves and went out to the impatient Belle and the exemplarily patient Sam.

***

They walked along well defined tracks for nearly an hour.  Sam was darting here and there but always returned to Nick's side after a few minutes.  Belle had resented being on her lead so after about fifteen minutes Gil let her off and hoped she wouldn't disappear into the heavily wooded woods beside the track.

Luckily she stayed with Sam.  In fact Nick thought that she may not have been anywhere like the woods before.

"We don't know her history; she could have spent her entire life in the local park and her back yard.  Never been allowed the freedom of the woods.  It's a shame that so many dogs are kept in an urban environment and never see woods and critters..."

"...do you think they'll catch a rabbit...or something?"

"It's possible.  We could have a rabbit stew."

"We could.  Would you skin it?"

"Sure.  But I thought you'd be okay with that?"

"I've never done it but I suppose I could."

"If Sam or Belle catches a rabbit they'll eat it themselves, not save it for us."

"True."  They walked on in silence for a little while before Gil spoke again.  "What you said about some dogs never coming to woods...some people in the cities never go to the woods either...or maybe have never been."

"Yeah.  Don't know what they're missing."

"The cold?  No TV?"

"Good job I brought my laptop then?"  Nick grinned and Gil smirked.

"I brought mine but then is there any Wi-Fi or connection?"

"Shit."  Nick laughed.  "Probably not.  But I've got a couple of DVD's with me we can play them on the laptop."

"That's more than I've got."

"You can take the boy out the city but you can't take the city out the boy."

"Hardly boys, Nick.  Hardly boys."  He raised his eyebrows and smirked some more.

When they got back to the cabin they were warm from walking and the cabin was hot from the stove.  They had to leave the door open a little while to cool down.

Gil searched his boxes and found the soup while Nick unpacked his clothes upstairs.  There were a couple of racks to hang up clothes and a few shelves and that was it.  The roof had four skylights that opened and the four beds, the racks and the shelving were all along the wooden walls of the cabin with enough room to walk around to the stairs than ran down the side of the cabin to the living area.  The rail stopped you falling off and there was a wooden gate at the top of the stairs to stop anyone falling down the stairs in the dark.

The open wooden steps were difficult for dogs to negotiate...Sam tried first and awkwardly managed to get to Nick.  Belle wasn't bothered at that time because although Sam had gone upstairs Gil was still downstairs and, more importantly, had food.  Not her food, she knew, but it was still food.

"Soup's ready."  Gil called and Nick ran downstairs with Sam looking down at him and wondering if he could actually make it down.  "It's up to you Sam...what goes up must come down."  But he stopped and watched to see if he could do it on his own or whether he would have to launch a rescue mission.

After a few pre-emptive strikes Sam came down the slippery steps, step by step, very cautiously.

"Good boy.  There may be a cracker in it for you."  He rubbed behind Sam's ear.  He went to the sink and washed his hands before sitting at the breakfast bar that separated the kitchen from the living space.  The still steaming bowl of vegetable soup was waiting for him and a box of crackers lay between him and Gil.

"No niceties like plates then?"

"Washing up, Nick.  There's no dishwasher...except you."

"Good idea of yours not to use plates."  He blew on a spoonful of soup to cool it and then stopped before sipping it.  "Why me, we could share...have a rota."

"Okay. The person who cooks doesn't do the washing up."

"You said you didn't mind doing the cooking."

"Which means you've got to do the washing up."

Nick frowned.  "I think I just walked into that."

"You did.   But if you want to cook that's no problem."

After they'd finished Sam and Nick had half a cracker each.  They were rarely fed at the table so it was a special treat, but they were all on a vacation.  Nick washed up and made a pot of coffee while Gil went to unpack his duffel bag.  Belle had no problem at all negotiating the stairs and was up them without the blink of an eye.  Sam watched her but then turned away and slumped onto the floor to sleep...he just didn't care that she could go up the stairs without a problem.

When Gil got down they sat in two armchairs in front of the stove that Nick had replenished with logs and sat looking at the flames as they started to lick around the new damp wood.

"I have chocolate cookies."  Gil said absently.

"Oh my God.  Forbidden luxury.  Where?  Where are they?"  Nick asked urgently.  He never allowed himself to buy or eat cookies but Gil always had a stash since he had a sweet tooth that he did indulge.  His downfall, in Nick's opinion...although he had dropped quite a few pounds since he'd been walking first Sam and then both dogs.

"In the cupboard over the fridge.  Two each or they'll be gone before dinner."

Nick hastily retrieved the treat and by some miraculous timing both Sam and Belle were suddenly sitting front of them.

"No cookies for you...dogs don't do sugar but you can have your own cookies when we've finished."  Nick knew that if he gave them their dog treat while he and Gil were still eating their cookies then they would expect some crumbs...  So after the mouth wateringly good cookies the dogs each had their treat.

Despite the caffeine in the coffee both men drifted off to sleep.  They were awakened abruptly by the dogs going ape shit and then a few moments later there was a knock on their cabin door.  Both dogs were at the door sniffing, but had stopped barking

"Sit."  Gil spoke and both dogs immediately did as they were told but as close as they could get to the door. 

He moved them out of the way and opened the door to be greeted by a big guy hardly wrapped up at all against the cold... in a short sleeved t-shirt and a body warmer.  The cold blast of air from the open door had made Gil shiver, either that or the guy's bare arms.

"Hi, I'm Ted, site manager, just checking everything's okay.  Good pair of guard dogs you have there."

"Hi, Ted."  Gil extended his hand.   "They are. It's great; we've settled in...in fact you just woke us up..."

"...sorry."

"No, please don't be, we need to stay awake or we won't sleep tonight."

"I bet you will...the country air after the city, usually knocks everyone out for the first couple of days."

"If that's the case we'll be sleeping the whole time...we go home on Monday morning."

"The rest will do you good.  If you need anything I'm at the office by where you drove in...about a mile back.  You can get provisions there if you run out."

"Thanks for that."

"You're welcome.  Have a good stay."  He turned to leave and go back to a truck parked some way behind Gil's.

"We will."  Gil called and then closed the door.

Nick was stretching and yawning.

"I bet you feel worse now?  You want to get some more sleep?"  Gil asked, since Nick had been at work last night and had only had a couple of naps in the truck as Gil drove.

"No, if I get too much I won't sleep tonight but judging by what the guy said we're pretty much going to sleep the whole time anyways."

"It won't do us any harm.  Exercise the dogs and rest between."

"What are we going to do?  I anticipated having a kid with us."

"Read?  I've brought a couple of books with me.  There's some games in that cupboard..."  He pointed to a cupboard beneath the stairs.  "...and I've brought a pack of cards with me...I thought we could have taught Eli..."

***

Nick was looking in amazement at Gil and Gil raised his eyebrows at Nick questioning the look. 

"Cards?  His dad was an addicted gambler."  Nick elaborated.

"But there's no reason to think that Eli will become an addict."

"Tell that to the Kennedy's."

"The Kennedy's?"  Gil frowned and looked at Nick as if he'd gone mad.

"Yeah, I saw two Kennedys...JFK's nephews I think they were...on the Today show and they said addiction didn't run in their family...it galloped.  There's a lot of history of alcohol and drug abuse through all the lines of the family.  I mean we have a real big family back home in Texas but I don't know of any one of them having got an addiction...that doesn't mean there wasn't or even isn't one...but I never heard."

"Okay.  No card games with Eli."

"I don't know...maybe not, don't chance fate."

"So, more coffee?"

"Yeah.  I've got a book to read; the latest James Patterson.  I like to find the forensic mistakes."

"One of my books is one my father gave to me and used to read to me at bedtime.  I was going to read it to Eli.  The Wind in the Willows."

"What's that about?"

"What's it about?"  Gil was incredulous.

"Isn't it a Disney film?"   Nick may have been joking...or maybe not.

"Oh Nick, I despair.  What exactly did you read when you were a boy because it's one of the most famous books ever written for children."

"Comics.  Lots of comics. The Hardy Boys...they were my favourites for years.  Tom Sawyer, of course.  I read books that were already in the house from Dan and the girls."

"Then I think I need to read The Wind in the Willows to you, not Eli."

Gil was still chuckling from his remark about reading to Nick and Nick was smiling but then he spoke.

"Let's take the dogs for a good run and then come back, have dinner and then you, Dr Grissom, can read that famous book to me."  He declared with a Texan flourish.

Gil laughed but then said.  "You do dinner...I read to you."

"It's a deal."

They dressed up warmly since it was colder now in the late afternoon than it was earlier; they walked until it was very nearly dark and both men were tired but the dogs were still full of life and enthusiasm.

"I reckon if they could talk they'd be saying, 'oh dad, let us stay out longer'."

"You're right.  You know it was certainly a good idea to have this break from the city and we should make more of an effort to take them longer walks...when we can.  When I'm not at work I could drive out of the city and take them and then on your days off you could do the same.  When the two events coincide we could go together."

"That's a plan."

"It is."

They stoked up more wood in the stove and put their boots, scarves, hats and gloves beside it to dry out and keep them warm.  Nick went off to start dinner.  Steaks cooked in a pan with onions and mushrooms.  He'd prepared potatoes, before he cooked the steaks, by boiling them for a few minutes and then cutting them into small cubes and roasting them in the oven in oil and he sliced a couple of tomatoes to fry in the pan.

When he delivered it to the breakfast bar to them to eat it was a hot and delicious feast.  They both cleared their plates but remembered to save just a small piece of steak each for their canine companions.

When they'd finished Nick grinned from ear to ear.  "Now it's your turn to wash-up!"

"I know it is and after that meal I think I should relinquish all my cooking duties to you.  It was a great.  Thank you."

"You're welcome."

By the time the place was tidied up and they'd sat down with a couple of beers in front of the stove both men and dogs appeared drowsy.

"Okay.  Get started then."  Nick demanded.

"You really want me to read to you?"

"Yeah."

"Okay. It's just that I wasn't certain you weren't joking with me."

"I wasn't."

"No."  Gil stood up.  "I'll get the book."

Gil retrieved the book from his bag upstairs and came back down and made himself comfortable again.

"Ready?"  He asked and smiled at Nick.

"As I'll ever be."

Gil took a few deep breaths and opened the book.

"Chapter One, The River Bank."  He began.  "THE Mole had been working very hard all the morning, spring-cleaning his little home."

He spoke steadily and very expressively giving the animal characters distinct voices.  Nick closed his eyes and as Gil glanced over from time to time he was sure he was asleep, but he continued to read the tale out aloud.

"...'He learnt to swim and to row, and entered into the joy of running water; and with his ear to the reed-stems he caught, at intervals, something of what the wind went whispering so constantly among them.'  End of chapter one.  You can wake up now."

"I'm not asleep.  You read very well.  It was great the way you made the characters all different.  Eli would have loved it...hell, I love it.  Chapter two?"

"Really?"  Gil was surprised but secretly very happy.

"Really."

"Yeah...then I'll make a bedtime drink...I see you brought some drinking chocolate.  You're getting me into some bad habits."

"You're on vacation."

"I am, aren't I?  Maybe we could have cookies with it then."

Nick listened attentively as Gil read chapter two and at the end he declared that Gil should continue his reading the next evening.

They had their drinks and two more cookies each and then let out the dogs for a final pee and run around.  Nick stood on the porch with his flashlight and didn't venture out any further into the cold night.  The wind had picked up and was rustling the trees around the cabin.  Nick smiled to himself, it may have been cold but it was peaceful and he was happy to be there.  He called the dogs and they went back inside.  Gil was just coming out of the bathroom.

"Do you think I should stoke the fire up for the night?"  Nick wanted to know.

"Good idea.  It'll keep us warm up in the roof.  It'll die down before we get up but there's an electric fire we can put on first thing if it's too cold."

"I think I can guarantee it'll be too cold for us."  Nick laughed and Gil nodded.  "Where are the dogs sleeping?  On the spare beds...we can put their blankets on each bed...our single beds aren't going to be big enough for us and them."

"Good idea."  Belle was waiting at the foot of the stairs...determined not to be missed.  Sam was keeping an eye on proceedings from the rug in front of the stove.

Nick got ready for bed and the dogs were shown their respective beds and were soon curled up, happy that their masters were close by.

Nick turned out the lights and he and Gil settled in their beds.  They were warm and comfortable.

"Man, you better not snore."

"Nor you.  Although I bet we'll both snore but sleep through it.  I'm tired now...really tired."

"No farting either."

"I'll try and keep them in-house."

"You do that!"

"Night then, see you in the morning."

"You will.  Night."

The men and dogs were all asleep within moments.

When he really thought about it, in the following week, Gil decided that that was the day it had happened.  That was the day he'd fallen in love with Nick...

A/N 2:

The story about the Kennedys really did air on the Today programme and was reported in the British press!

***

Gil was up early, well rested.  Nick was still fast asleep.  Gil went downstairs and put on the electric heater before he did anything else and then he visited the bathroom.  When he came out, two dogs were waiting for him.

"You want a bathroom break too?"  He whispered.

He grabbed his anorak and put it on over his pyjamas, opened the door and let them out.  He waited while the sniffed around a little and Sam pissed up a number of posts and bushes while Belle sedately crouched and did one long pee.

"Okay, come on back.  It's too cold for me.  Come on."  Both dogs ran back into the cabin knowing full well that their food would be served up.

Gil started the coffee machine and then emptied the ash tray beneath the stove.  The ashes were still warm though the fire had long since died out.  He laid out the paper and sticks to start the fire for the day ahead and in a few minutes had a good enough blaze to enable him to place larger logs onto the fire.  The damp wood crackled and the flames faltered a little but then they took hold of the logs.

"Okay.  Heat.  Now coffee.  Then your meals."  The dogs had watched Gil go about his task probably annoyed that he'd chosen to heat the cabin before feeding them

He poured a coffee for himself and Nick and took Nick's drink up to him.  "You awake?"  He put the coffee on the floor by the bed.

"I am now.  Is it morning already?"

"It does appear to be.  Stay where you are, I'll feed the dogs and do breakfast and call you when it's ready."

"Thanks, I could get used to this.  These beds are really comfortable and yet I usually sleep in one probably three times the size."

"They are comfortable but if I'm really tired I can sleep anywhere...but even if your bed is a lot bigger you still only sleep in a space the size of your body."  Gil smirked down at Nick.

"Yeah, okay, smart ass.  What's for breakfast?"

"Bacon, eggs, pancakes and maple syrup.  Oh, and toast, coffee and juice and cereal too, if you're still hungry. "

"I'll probably need to come back to bed if I eat all that."

"You can...you're on vacation."

Nick laughed.  "You think I'd get any sleep with Sam staring at me and silently accusing me of dog abuse for not taking him a walk.  Although..."  Nick smirked up at Gil.

"Although what?"  Gil looked suspicious.

"Although I could stay here and you could take both dogs."  Nick grinned triumphantly.

"If you're that desperate for rest I can do that."

"You would?"

"Sure, I don't mind."

"I'm joking man, but that's real nice of you...you know?"

"Not that nice, I have to take Belle..."

"...yeah, but it's your vacation too."

"I don't work shifts anymore and I know it takes a toll on your sleep."

"I must be used to it by now it's been fifteen years..."  He huffed out a breath.  "...where has all that time gone?  What have I done?"

"Plenty..."

"...no maudlin thoughts...go get that breakfast cooked."  He sat up and flung back his bedding.  I'll have a shower while you cook."  He picked up his coffee and took a long drink.

"Okay. I'll feed the dogs first."

Nick was well and truly stuffed full by the time he'd eaten all his breakfast.  He washed all the dishes while Gil had his shower and then they dressed for the great outdoors.  As soon as they opened the door they we well aware that the temperature had dropped substantially...or the wind chill factor had overtaken it...the wind was biting into them as they started.  Even with their beanies on their heads were cold.  First Nick and then Gil pulled up the hoods of their anoraks for extra protection.

"I had thought we'd take a really long hike this morning but fuck it's cold even with all that food inside of us."  Nick was not feeling happy about the cold.

"You'll warm up as you walk.  Stop whining...the dogs love it."  He grinned out of his hooded head gear.

"It's an adventure for them."  Sam and Belle were chasing around sniffing and peeing...but neither dog ventured too far away from Gil and Nick.

They ended up following a trail in a circle around their cabin and arrived back much warmer about two hours later.  The fire was on its last legs so Nick stoked it up immediately.  Gil set the coffee going and retrieved the cookies.

"We've earned these."

"You've just exercised half your breakfast away and now you're eating cookies..."

"...if you don't want one..."

"...hand 'em over."  Gil passed the packet to Nick and he took two.  "I think these will do for my lunch so shall I put together a chili?"

"I was hoping you'd volunteer a chilli.  I made sure I have everything you need."

"Okay...here's the deal...I'll prepare it and put it on to cook.  You read me another couple of chapters of the book.  When it's cooked we can take the dogs for a quick walk...they've had enough exercise already.  Come back.  I'll make up the dinner and then..."

"...I can read you some more?"

"You catch on real quick."

"You like issuing orders."

"I do, don't I?"  He laughed and took a third cookie.  There was only one left.  "Have you got any more?"

"I might have.  But we could do with fresh bread."

"Okay let's go shop now and have a look around because we need to get something for Eli."

"We do.  I was thinking while we were out walking whether it would have been too cold for him."

"No way if he was wrapped up warm; he would have been playing around with the dogs...but I bet he'd be asleep by now after a two hour hike."

"That's true.  Come on then we don't want to get settled and then have to go out because we won't go."

Nick nodded his agreement and they finished their coffees; Gil had the last cookie in the packet.

They got bread.  For Tina, Nick found a long silk shawl printed with multi-coloured butterflies and for Eli they bought a big cuddly mountain lion toy, a child's book about the canyon and some crayons and a colouring book with pictures of the animals found in the canyon.  Gil bought himself a history of the canyon and asked if Nick would like him to read it to him. 

"When you've finished The Wind in the Willows.  Don't want to get ahead ourselves do we?"

And once again Gil wasn't that sure that Nick was joking.

***

The chili tasted even better than when they were in Vegas and both men were full to the brim with food.  Gil read quite a lot of the book to Nick who seemed to really appreciate the tale of the riverbank animals.  But they were ready for bed really early; the exercise, the mountain air, whatever it was all four of them were fast asleep at nine o'clock.

It was warmer and sunnier on Sunday and they took an even longer hike around the trails.   Nick took lots of photographs and for the first time Gil found out that Nick did know a lot about ornithology and also that he liked to paint using water colours.

"You haven't got any of your own paintings hanging in your home have you?  I'm sure I would have noticed."

"There are two in the lobby.  So much for your observational skills, Dr Grissom."  He thought for a moment or two and smirked.  "And your cleaning skills...I guess you didn't check them for dust."  Nick laughed and then realised that Gil had stopped dead in his tracks and was behind him.  Belle came running back to him closely flowed by Sam...just confirming that they didn't, for one moment, lose track of their owners and a change in their behavioural pattern.

"I did see them and I did dust them.  But Nick..."  He stopped and stared at Nick.

"What?"

"I admired them and I admit I didn't check to see who'd painted them but I thought they were by a professional painter...a professional.  Nick, you're good.  No.  Excellent."

Nick actually blushed.  "Thanks.  I try.  I've always loved water colours and mom and dad bought me a proper painting set-up for my tenth birthday."

"You must have more than two paintings?"

"I have and I've given away some to my family, but I have a crate of them in the spare room."

"When we get back I want to see them."  Gil almost demanded.

"Okay."

They walked on in silence for some time. Then Nick grinned at Gil.  "I could paint something for you if you want."

"Really?  Would you?  A bird?  Or do you do anything else?"

"I do mostly birds as I love them and love to paint them, but I have done a few landscapes."

"If I may, I'll look at the photos you've taken today and chose one for you to paint for me...would that be okay?"

"Sure, that's a good idea."

"I'm really looking forward to choosing."  He smiled at Nick and Nick chuckled.

Just a few minutes later Nick caught sight of a small blue coloured bird perching on a rock.  He stopped and put a hand up to stop Gil, luckily the dogs were behind them checking out a trail of their own.  He put his index finger to his lips to indicate quiet and Gil nodded while Nick gently got his camera ready and started taking pictures of the bird.  He got quite a few before the bird became spooked and flew off away from them.

"What was that?"  Gil wanted to know.

"It was a Steller's Jay.  Quite a beauty."

"It was, you're right."

They walked on for another half an hour occasionally commenting on something or other and the dogs ran around them back and forth.  Suddenly, Nick stopped in his tracks and whispered something Gil didn't hear before grabbing his camera and pointing it up and started clicking furiously as a very large bird swooped and then climbed just a hundred or so yards to the side and above them.

Gil watched in awe as it spent about a minute obviously searching for some food, but then it flew off and got higher and higher until it was just a speck on the horizon.

"What did you say, I didn't hear?"

Nick laughed.  "Holy shit Batman."

Gil laughed.  "What was it...it wasn't an eagle I know that much."

"It was a very lucky sighting of a Californian Condor.  Rare, man, even round here."

"Right.  We've been lucky then?"

"We have."  Nick was grinning and obviously very satisfied with the sighting.  "You'll have to open the next pack of cookies when we get back.  Celebrate.

"I can see why you never buy cookies...if you did you'd just eat the lot in one go wouldn't you?"

"You got that right."

They had two cookies each with a coffee and then the four of them slept for a couple of hours in front of the fire. 

When they emerged from their sleep and had drunk some more coffee Gil read to Nick again.  He'd discovered that he really enjoyed reading the book aloud and it very much reminded him of his dad.  And the animal voices he'd been using, he realised were the voices his dad had used.  He'd been devastated when he died and he remembered just how quiet the house had become.  His mom was inconsolable and although she could speak, she rarely did and the silence only served to heighten their loss.

"What are thinking about?  You look really sad."  Nick asked Gil very quietly.

"My dad.  He died when I was nine and I was thinking about the silence in the house afterwards.  It was hard on mom, and I guess she was severely depressed but I don't remember her seeing the doctor, she just lived with it...it took her three of four years to come round."

Nick was amazed; this was the most personal information Gil had shared since the day they'd met in the park and he'd told him about Sara.  "I cannot even begin to imagine the solitude you must have experienced.  In my house, growing up, I would have killed for a little peace and quiet.  That's why I had no problem settling in Vegas, you know.  On my own for the first time in all my life.  It was heaven...at least it was back in the day.  Now I wonder how I made it to forty-one and am still alone, you know?"

"Being married.  Being with someone isn't all it's cracked up to be.  Maybe I was too old to try my hand at it...I don't know."

"Have you heard from Lady...Dr Kessler?"  Nick knew that Gil had written to her in the hope of rekindling their friendship.

"No.  I can tell you Nick, that there's no fool like an old fool."

"You're not that old...fifty-five?"

"Six."  He looked wistfully over at Nick.  "And I feel it...although not this weekend.  It's been a really good weekend just the two of us...I know we should have had Eli with us and if he'd been here, I'm sure it would have been just as good."

"Busier, I bet."

"All the walks?  He'd have been asleep a lot of the time.  The fresh air."

"Yeah...we can only hope that he would have been because otherwise we'd have been on our knees with exhaustion."  Nick laughed.

"You're not wrong."

"That's my saying.  You copying me?"

"Copying?" Gil thought for a moment or two.  "You know I think I am.  Imitation is the sincerest form of flattery."

"Who said that?"

"Oh, similar words were used for the first time in texts in the eighteenth century...but Charles Caleb Colton popularised it in the nineteenth..."

"...how the fuck do you know that?"  Nick chuckled.

"I must have read it somewhere."

"Gilipedia."

"You flatter me."  Gil was smirking.

"You deserve it."  Nick was serious.

***

Gil had finished reading The Wind in the Willows on the Sunday evening before they went to bed.  On the Monday morning they had a huge breakfast, packed their bags and then set off on their last hike before leaving.  They had to be out of the cabin before eleven and they made it back at ten forty-five.  Enough time for a coffee, a piss and loading the truck.

They settled the dogs in their harnesses on the back seat and as usual they immediately curled up and slept.  Even they weren't used to so much exercise.

"I'll drive; you drove up here."

"I'm okay with that...are you going to get any sleep today?"

"Might get a couple of hours before I have to go in.  See how I feel."

"Okay...I remember the days trying to do that."  He remembered the tiredness and his aching body...he didn't miss it at all.

They got under way and as with journey up to Bryce the roads were clear and the weather fine so Nick made good progress.

It was on the journey back to Vegas that Gil started to think about his friendship with Nick and that how, it seemed to him, it had become more.  Much more...

He must have slept a little because he jerked awake and Nick was parking up next to a diner.

"Coffee, sleeping beauty?"  Nick was addressing Gil but Belle yelped her trademark sound of approval and they both laughed.

"She obviously knows what's good for her."  Gil stretched out.  "You want to give them a run first...how long have we been on the road..." he looked at his watch and whistled, "...two and half hours?  How long have I been asleep?"

Nick laughed.  Since we drove down the path from the cabin?"

Gil laughed with him.  "I remember hitting the highway so that's not true.  What do you say Belle?"  Once more she yelped...obviously totally agreeing with her master.

"You've got that dog very well trained."

"I do, don't I?"  Gil smirked and Nick looked at him and shook his head and remembered the phrase...imitation is the sincerest form of flattery...  Grissom was getting weird...or not.  He laughed. 

"Come on Sam, bring your girlfriend and let's go pee up every spare tree, bush and fence."

"I hope you don't intend to join him."

"Don't worry I'll use the restroom."  Nick smirked back at Gil and Gil laughed.

"My smirks are better practised.  You're not a smirking kind of guy...more a grinner."

"A grinner?"

"Yes, showing those even teeth."

"Leave my teeth out of it...they cost my mom a lot of money."  He grinned at Gil for the effect.

As they walked their dogs around the car lot Gil remembered what he'd been thinking before he fell asleep.  That he had a closer relationship with Nick than he ever had with Sara...or, he thought, with anyone else he'd ever known.  He smirked again but this time just for himself.

They made better time getting home than they did going to the canyon.  Nick dropped off Gil and Belle and all the remaining food and then was ready to leave to go to his home.

"You know, Gil?  I had a real good time.  Best few days' vacation that I've had for years.  We must do it again...and take Eli, of course."

"I agree.  Thanks for your company, Nick."

"You're welcome.  And for yours..."  They actually stood facing each other on Gil's driveway and both men felt awkward.

But Nick grinned and stepped forward and gave Gil a manly hug...their first ever physical contact as far as Gil could remember.  They patted each other's back and then broke apart.

"Do you remember...years ago when you took that sabbatical and I hugged you and said goodbye?  I thought you were leaving for good and you said something like, 'what the fuck are you doing, Nick?'"

"Oh yes, I do.  I wasn't leaving...and I didn't cuss."

"I know now and I lost money on the bet."

"There were bets?"  Gil asked, amazed.

"Of course, man, it's the lab!"  He grinned.

"Of course, I should have remembered that."

"I'll see you around?"

"You will.  Call me if you need me to take Sam in the morning...remember I go to work at seven-thirty.

"I will...hope it's a quiet...

"...don't say it."

"Too late I've probably jinxed myself.  You'd think I'd have learned the lesson by now.  When are we taking the presents to Eli?"

"Tomorrow evening after I've been to work and before you go to work?"

"Good plan."  He jumped into his truck and before he closed his door he spoke again.  "It was a good vakay!"   He slammed his door and reversed off the driveway.

Gil and Belle watched him go and Gil waved to him; Nick flashed his emergency lights in response.

Once indoors, Gil unpacked and put everything away, watched by Belle.  He looked at her and shook his head.  "I know.  You miss Sam.  You know what?  I miss Nick, too."  Belle came to him and put her front paws on his chest and stretched out.  Gil ruffled the hair of her neck with both his hands.  She moved her head back and forth appreciatively.  "I'm going to have to think about this, Belle.  Really think about Nick and how I feel."

The following evening they both drove over to see Tina and Eli.  Eli was better and back at school the next day.  He loved his presents, the mountain lion was the biggest soft toy he'd ever seen, or so he said, and he was also interested in the reading book and the colouring book.  He also made sure that Nick had remembered his promise to take him back to Bryce canyon as soon as he could.  Nick promised that he would.

Tina was overcome with the silk shawl that Nick had chosen for her.  She said it was the loveliest present she'd had for years and she wept.  Eli got up from the floor where he'd been inspecting his presents to give his mom a hug.  The men smiled at each other enjoying the scene.

After the visit they went their separate ways and Gil was thinking about Nick again as he drove home.

In fact, Gil thought of little else for the next few days.  He spoke to Nick several times but didn't see him again and he took Sam a walk each morning since Nick had to work over.

But Gil was confused by his own feelings.  He knew that he loved Nick.  It felt so natural and good.  But the problem was...how did he love Nick?

As a friend?

As a father figure?

As a lover?

He certainly loved him as a friend of that he was in no doubt.  What he needed to discover about himself was whether that friendship had gone deeper...he was pretty certain that it had.  But was it as a cherished son...a son he'd never had and would probably never have.  He was being ridiculous...he would never have a son.  Period.  But was it as lover...were his feelings of a sexual nature?

He had been heterosexual all his life...except for something that had happened at college. 

A friend and fellow science student, Mark, had been gay and had spoken to Gil about his feelings.  Feelings that he'd had for Gil.  Gil was quite open-minded and he'd really liked his friend and with hardly a thought about it he'd decided he was prepared to experiment.  So they dated...if it could be called that...usually a meal with everyone else in the cafeteria and would then go back to one of their rooms, talk a great deal and then make out.  It got as far and mutual masturbation and Mark gave Gil, as he remembered very well, his first and most spectacular blow job...even to this day.

But then a young blond man called Marty accidently barged into Mark and in a matter of hours Gil was dumped and Mark and Marty become a couple.  Gil had remained ambivalent about his own homosexual experience...he hadn't dismissed it as part of his psyche but after Mark he had always chosen women...just a few women at that.  He was never promiscuous.

So he had some...a little...knowledge of a gay relationship.

What was worrying was the father-figure scenario.  Tina had thought that Warrick looked on him as a father figure but Nick had disagreed about that.  Nick had laughed when asked if he thought Gil was father figure.  And if he was honest, Gil didn't feel fatherly to either Warrick or Nick and never had done...but he'd been reading out aloud to a grown man.

And not only that but it was a children's book that his own father had read to him.  Nick had asked him to read it and he'd already established that he didn't look on Gil as a father figure.  But underlying it all Gil had to admit to himself he was sure he wanted Nick in a sexual way...he definitely wanted to kiss him, fondle him and...he couldn't deny it...make love to him.

Gil was tied in knots at all the scenarios his imagination kept reeling out...and in the end he decided on just one course of action. 

Sink or swim...

***

Next part of Making Friends....