Title: Worth the Wait
By: angstytimelord
Pairing: Greg Sanders/Ryan Wolfe
Series: 1) Catch Me I'm Falling, 2) Sparks, 3) Holding Steady, 4) More Than Ready, 5) Talk About It, 6) Confessions, 7) Fate's Plan, 8) Exposed, 9) A Matter of Feeling, 10) Loving Every Minute of It, 11) Street of Dreams, 12) One of Our Own, 13) Cold Storage, 14) Life Or Death, 15) Hole in My Heart, 16) Someone To Pull the Trigger, 17) Every Beat of the Heart, 18) No Promises, 19) Perfect Morning, 20) Everything Works If You Let It, 21) Dark To Light, 22) Into Temptation, 23) Covered in Cappuccino
Fandom: CSI: Vegas/CSI: Miami
Rating: PG-13
Author's Note: Mentions of rape.
Disclaimer: This is entirely a product of my imagination, and I make no profit from it. I do not own the lovely Greg Sanders or Ryan Wolfe, just borrowing them for a while. Please do not sue.

***

Ryan closed his eyes as he lay next to Greg in bed, letting himself relax back into the pillows. He couldn't remember ever having felt so satisfied with anyone else; he and Greg had a connection that went beyond love, beyond the physical rapport between their bodies.

He had never thought that it was possible for him to love anyone the way he loved Greg Sanders. And it had all happened so quickly; all it had taken was one smile, one touch, and he had fallen so far and so fast that he knew he would never be able to get up again.

It wasn't in his nature to fall so deeply and so quickly for anyone -- but Greg Sanders wasn't just anyone. There had been an immediate rapport between them, even before he'd known anything about Greg. And that connection had gone far beyond mere sexual attraction.

There was something that had brought them together, right from the beginning. Ryan had never been one to place any kind of belief in fate, but he couldn't help thinking now that he and Greg had been fated to fall in love, right from their first meeting.

He'd never thought that it came easily to him, falling in love, Ryan mused as he ran a hand through Greg's hair. He had always felt that falling in love took time, that he had to get to know someone before he could love them. Greg had proved that theory wrong.

All it had taken was one look, one smile, and he had been a goner. Those incredible eyes had completely mesmerized him; all Greg had to do was smile and hold out a hand, and Ryan's heart had turned over in his chest. He'd held out that heart to the other man, never wanting it back again.

The most amazing thing, to him, was that Greg had done the same. He knew that he wasn't a bad-looking guy; there had been a lot of people in the past who had wanted him. But he'd never thought that he was the sort of man to inspire an all-consuming passion.

Again, Greg had proved him wrong. Greg's love for him had been like a whirlwind, enveloping him when he had least expected it. And he had welcomed that love with open arms, sending out his own so that the two of them had collided, merged, and become one.

Greg stirred beside him, but didn't wake from his slumber; he only tightened his arms around Ryan's waist and snuggled closer to him. Ryan couldn't help but smile at that; Greg was so loving, so trusting. He was what Ryan had waited for all of his life.

He had told himself during the long drive from Miami to Las Vegas when he had been on his way here that he was heading into a new life; no one needed to know about his past, and he certainly wasn't looking to get into a relationship. This had been the exact opposite of what he'd expected.

He hadn't planned to fall in love. He hadn't thought that he would do anything but work, get to know the city, make a friends at work -- and out of it. He'd thought that he would lead a fairly innocuous life, that he wouldn't make any waves at work, that he could settle into a comfortable existence.

Losing his heart on the first day he'd walked into the crime lab hadn't been in his plans, but he wouldn't have it any other way. If he could go back and change anything that had happened on that first day, he'd leave it all as it was, surprises and all.

He wouldn't change a thing about his relationship with Greg. They might not be perfect, but Greg was all that he could ever want in a partner. It didn't even matter ot him that they hadn't had sex yet; that could come later. It was more important for them to be close emotionally.

But he had to admit that he did miss sex, Ryan thought with an inward sigh. He didn't want to push Greg into anything he wasn't ready for, of course, but there were times when he wanted desperately to make love to his boyfriend.

He didn't want to take Greg; rather, he wanted to kiss him all over, savor every inch of that slender body, then slide into him and join their bodies slowly and gently. He wanted to show Greg that sex wasn't always a violation, that it could be the best thing to happen to him.

Being the more dominant partner in any relationship had always come naturally to him, Ryan thought, his arm tightening around Greg and drawing his sleeping boyfriend closer against the warmth of his body. It would be the greatest pleasure he'd ever had to initiate Greg.

If the bastard who had raped Greg so long ago wasn't already dead, he would kill the man right now, Ryan told himself, one fist clenching at his side. He wanted to decimate the man, to exterminate his memory from Greg's mind, along with the long-term damage he'd caused.

It didn't matter that the damage wasn't physical. The emotional damage that had been done to Greg at such a young age was what made it so hard for him to be openly sexual, even with anyone he cared about. Ryan's heart ached every time he thought of it.

How could anyone have hurt Greg like that? He could understand how Greg's rapist could have wanted him; he was sure that if he had known Greg at that time, he'd have wanted the young man, too. But he'd never have tied him down and raped him -- and threatened to kill him.

Then again, he'd never have done what those members of the Cuban mob had done to him back in Miami, either, Ryan thought wryly. The two of them seemed to have something in their natures that attracted men who wanted to do nothing but cause them as much pain as possible.

Neither one of them was the kind of man who advertised his masculinity -- or the fact that they were into men, either. Yet they had somehow both been targeted -- and maybe tht was a big part of the affinity they had for each other. They had each recognized a kindred spirit.

Was that why he'd fallen so completely for Greg within seconds of meeting him? Had fate led him directly to Greg, then pushed them together with the knowledge that they were meant for each other, and that all they had to do was meet?

Ryan didn't think that it was in Greg's nature to fall so quickly, either, yet they both had. Somehow, they had managed to find each other; it was as though they'd indeed been intended for each other by fate, and they would have come together no matter what had happened in their lives.

Everything that had happened between them felt completely natural, as thought it had all been meant to happen. Even the fact that they hadn't had sex yet didn't feel strange; with anyone else, Ryan might have been worried, but there were extenuating circumstances for himself and Greg.

But that didn't stop him from wanting Greg more and more with each day that went by. Every night, it was harder for him to have Greg in his arms like this and not want to make love to him. It was impossible to relax, not with his heart's desire next to him.

Greg didn't seem to realize how hard it was for him to hold himself back. And Ryan was terrified that his careful self-control would slip one night, and he would terrify Greg to the point where he would start to back off -- and everything they'd built would come tumbling down.

No, he told himself fiercely, tightening his grip on Greg again. He'd never do anything that would hurt his boyfriend, or scare him. It would be better if he simply sat down with Greg and told him how hard it was for him to keep holding back. Greg would understand.

Or would he? Ryan couldn't help being hesitant to tell his boyfriend exactly how he was feeling. He didn't want Greg to feel guilty -- and a confession like that would undoubtedly make him feel that he had some kind of responsibility to give himself to Ryan, even if he wasn't ready.

It wasn't in his nature -- or in any man's -- to hold back like this, and he was sure that Greg was feeling just as frustrated as he was at times. Maybe they simply needed to talk this out, to tell each other exactly how they felt, and move forward from there.

It was time for some of those walls between them to come down, Ryan thought, sighing again, audibly this time. He didn't think that Greg wanted to keep holding back, either -- it had to be hard for him to be this close and not want to be even more intimate.

He would find a good time to talk to Greg about this, he promised himself as he closed his eyes again, trying to let his body relax. It wasn't easy with Greg's naked frame pressed so closely against him, but he knew that he would eventually fall asleep from exhaustion.

And even if it was against his nature to hold himself back like this, Ryan thought before sleep began to claim him, he wouldn't give this relationship up, not for anything in the world. As long as he was with Greg in the end, it would all be well worth the wait.

***